Hi! Well this is my first fic and it suprised me. i'm a ususally happy person so when i thought about writing about bulimia it confused me, but i had to do it, idk y. Well this is basiclly a story about how Sakura hides her hurt from the world and deals with her troubles by well bulimia.
Summary: Sakura Haruno: always happy, always smiling, seems like she could never be sad or hurt. Well that's what you'd see if you looked on the outside, if you looked a little deeper you'd see a totally different person, a girl who hurts everyday, and handles it only one way, binging and purging everything.
Disclaimer: don't own it, wish i could though, that'd b so cool!
"Sakura! Guess what happened?!" Ino screamed into my ear.
"I don't know what?" I asked, not really caring what the answer would be. I had to study for my math test. If I got lower than a 98 then my grade would slip down to an A-, and my dad would kill me.
"I said guess, come on, please?" she pleaded.
"Ok, fine, you bought a new shirt at Hollister?" I guessed, hoping that was it and she would leave.
"No, I wish. Sasuke asked me out!" she squealed. I nearly fell out of my chair.
"W-what?" I asked, completely confused.
"Sasuke asked me out! After school today I was talking to him about the new poms uniforms when he just asked me, like out of no where! And of course I said yes! We're going out to the purple shellfish (A/N Red lobster, get it? Eh… no? ok neva mind) I finally got my dream guy, can you believe it?!"
"No, I can't, I'm really happy for you Ino," I lied. "Well, um, I go tot go study for my math test tomorrow so I'll talk to you later,"
"God, you are such a nerd," she teased. " Ok, call me when you're done,"
"Ok, bye," I hung up the phone and stared at my math book, not able to concentrate.
How could this happen? I wanted to be happy for Ino, but I just couldn't. Ino and I had been competing for Sasuke since we were 7 years old. When we were in the 7th Sasuke, Naruto and I had every single class together and I really got to know him. Underneath that mysterious hot guy we all saw was a hurt angry boy, who felt the world was resting on his shoulders and more than anything he wanted it to stop.
By 8th grade we were all best friends. We knew everything about each other, from Sasuke's brother, to Naruto's parents, to my dad, no problem we had was kept from each other, except for one. The more and more I got to know Sasuke, the more I fell in love with him. That's probably why he asking Ino out hurt me so much. No matter how much I wanted it to change, no matter what I would do him and I would only be friends.
And it hurt even more because it was Ino, the girl who had everything. I don't hate her, or even dislike her, I mean we are best friends, but why did she have to have him? She was already pretty, popular and plain amazing, why did she have to get the one thing I wanted the most in my life? But all our lives we always had to one up each other, and this wasn't any different, sadly.
I stood up from my chair and started walking to the kitchen. I suddenly had this strong craving for food. I started making my way towards the fridge when I saw a note in my dad's handwriting on the counter.
Sakura,
I went out for drinks with some friends.
I'm not sure what time I'll get back, so don't wait up for me.
Take care of Sano and Fuuka until I get back.
Love you
Dad
I crumpled up the note and threw it away. 'At least he left a note this time. But even if he didn't, we all know where he goes at night.' I thought angrily. At least four nights every week my dad would go out to drink with friends, probably have plenty of sex with numerous women and come about 6 in the morning smelling like booze and women's perfume.
The craving for food intensified after I read the note.
I made my way towards the fridge and took out yesterday's leftover lasagna, half of a blue berry pie, some ramen and two cans of sprite. I opened all the containers and started to wolf it down. I started to eat it with a fork, but soon I found out that I was so ravenous that it just got in the way, so I started to eat with my hands.
Food was my safe haven, when ever something went wrong in my life I would always turn to food. Then I would eat until I was so full I could barely breathe. I work usually have to work it off for hours the next day, but it was always worth it.
After I finished the food I opened the first can of sprite and chugged it down. The soda burned my throat as it went down and my eyes watered, but I always loved that feeling. I finished the first can in a matter of seconds and cracked open the second one and drained it faster than the first one. I turned on the TV and waited for the relief to wash in over me, but for some reason it didn't. Maybe, because this time my problem couldn't be forgotten with food.
I wanted it all out right now. Not just the food, but everything. To me being full right now was a symbol; it was all my problems pushing down on me, until I couldn't handle it, until I couldn't breathe.
I abruptly got off the couch and ran to the bathroom. There had to be some way to get all of this out of me. Just then an idea hit me.
I kneeled down in front of the porcelain toilet and stuck my index finger down my throat. Then presto, it all came rushing out, the lasagna, pie, ramen, spite and all my burdens just like magic. As soon as it was all out I felt loads better. I stood up, flushed the toilet and washed my hands.
I guess I had found my new safe haven, eating bunches upon bunches of food, and purging it all, as well as what was troubling me. Food coming up felt so much better that it did going down.
I exited the bathroom, and started to make dinner for my siblings, and started to study for my math test tomorrow.
Well, that all she wrote! I hope you enjooyed reading it. Oh and incase you didn't pick this up, Sano and Fuuka are her little brother(sano) and sister(fuuka). Well reveiw and if you have any questions then um, PM me,email me or ask it in a reveiw. R&R!!
Make love, not war (from the fresh prince, love that show!)
Max aka xoflowrinbloomxo (i messed up on it it's supposed to read xo flower in bloomxo)