Ok, first off, I don't own Final Fantasy 7 or the Weakest link. Satisfied?
Good, I hate disclaimers. -_- Also, this is my first fic, so no flaming
please!
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Cameraman- Who the hell are you? You're not the host.
??????- Uh. I'm the new host, the others were killed when I shot.. I mean they died in a car accident.
Cameraman- Well, at least tell me you're damn name.
??????- Uh, call me Kia.
Cameraman- *falls asleep*
Kia- What an idiot, falling asleep right after a question, hehe.
*Kia runs up to the stage to find out none of his contestants are there, but they seem to be hiding in the audience*
Kia- First one up here gets a cookie!
*Kia waves a cookie in the air, not noticing Yuffie stealing something out of his pocket*
Yuffie- Oolala! Wait. What the hell is this? *holds up a banana*
Kia- *turns around* Uh. that's for the monkey god later? Aww damn, just go sit down over there. *points to Yuffie's stand*
Kia- That's it, if the others don't get up here now, I'm gonna give Yuffie the money!
*Every contestant runs to their stand*
Kia- Finally. Anyway, let me introduce our contestants!
Tifa- *whispering* Hey Cloud, I hope he's gonna ask questions about you, I know everything!
Cloud- *disgusted face* What the hell, do you study me or something?
Tifa- Um. yes.
*Cloud backs away from Tifa*
Kia- First we have the so-called hero of FF7, Cloud Strife!
Cloud- Uh, hello.
Kia- Next we have Harvey Vincent! Attorney at law!
*Vincent flips Kia off and makes an angry face*
Kia-Ok then, now we have the infamous guy who died before anyone knew him, Zack!
*Zack is caught licking his hand or sphaghetti noodles and sauce*
Kia- Zack, did you steal from the audience?
*Man in audience raises his hand*
Kia- Tch.
*Kia walks over to Zach, takes the noodles and throws them at Vincent who shoots Zack in the head*
Kia- Uh. security! Take away his body and get us a new contestant!
Guy1- No.
Kia- What did you say?
Guy2- Uh, he's being like this today. come on George.
George- No
*Vincent shoots George in the head*
Kia- Damn, that had to hurt. Why did you do that Vincent?
Vincent- He stole my credit card.
Kia- . Well, next we have uh. *points to Sephy*
Kia- Get the hell up here!
Sephy- I knew this was gonna happen. Stupid fortune tellers..
Kia- First off, the history of Sephy. He used the black material to control Cloud for a servent. Making poor cloud scratch his feet every day. Well, enough of that, next contestant. Sephy- How the hell did you find that out?
Kia-...... Internet?
Sephy- Damn the internet, damn the people, damn you Cloud Strife!
Kia- Yeah, I think Cloud posted it.. Anyway, next we have the horrible rapper and cooker, Barret!
*Barret flips out the audience and raps*
Barret- My momma is betta' den yo momma cuz mine makes cookies fo me!
Kia- I'm not even gonna ask.... Well, next we have Cloud fan #1, who studies his every dang move, Tifa Lockheart!
Tifa- Thankies. Thankies.
Kia- Is it true that you put a video camera in his bathroom just to see how long it takes him to use the bathroom?
Tifa- Not just that, but more stuff that some people don't wanna know. *grins happily*
Kia- I'm sure our next contestant would like to know about it. He is Cid Highwind!
Cid- What the @#%*^(@ hell are you talking about. Are you accusing me of being !^%$&^% gay!?
Kia- Yeah.
Cid- @#$% you jackass.
Kia- Next we have a girl who has been revived by authors to many times, so I'm saying this. She is not real Cloud!
*Cloud pouts*
Kia- Aeris Gainsborough's spirit who has no legs!
Aeris- Hi all. Want a flower?
Kia- Sure. *takes a flower and puts it on his stand* And next, we have our last contestant, Yuffie Kisaragi!
Yuffie- Show me da money!
Kia- Well, will our pathetic contestants be able to win the million? Will the real Naniki please stand up? Find out next time on... Uh, what is this called?
Cameraman- Final Fantasy Weakest Link you jackass.
Kia- Uh, what he said!
Authors notes- Yes yes, I know I used tons of different slogans and all but please give me credit. This is my first fic after all. I hoped you liked it, so click the review button and send away! ^-^ *runs into the distance*
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Cameraman- Who the hell are you? You're not the host.
??????- Uh. I'm the new host, the others were killed when I shot.. I mean they died in a car accident.
Cameraman- Well, at least tell me you're damn name.
??????- Uh, call me Kia.
Cameraman- *falls asleep*
Kia- What an idiot, falling asleep right after a question, hehe.
*Kia runs up to the stage to find out none of his contestants are there, but they seem to be hiding in the audience*
Kia- First one up here gets a cookie!
*Kia waves a cookie in the air, not noticing Yuffie stealing something out of his pocket*
Yuffie- Oolala! Wait. What the hell is this? *holds up a banana*
Kia- *turns around* Uh. that's for the monkey god later? Aww damn, just go sit down over there. *points to Yuffie's stand*
Kia- That's it, if the others don't get up here now, I'm gonna give Yuffie the money!
*Every contestant runs to their stand*
Kia- Finally. Anyway, let me introduce our contestants!
Tifa- *whispering* Hey Cloud, I hope he's gonna ask questions about you, I know everything!
Cloud- *disgusted face* What the hell, do you study me or something?
Tifa- Um. yes.
*Cloud backs away from Tifa*
Kia- First we have the so-called hero of FF7, Cloud Strife!
Cloud- Uh, hello.
Kia- Next we have Harvey Vincent! Attorney at law!
*Vincent flips Kia off and makes an angry face*
Kia-Ok then, now we have the infamous guy who died before anyone knew him, Zack!
*Zack is caught licking his hand or sphaghetti noodles and sauce*
Kia- Zack, did you steal from the audience?
*Man in audience raises his hand*
Kia- Tch.
*Kia walks over to Zach, takes the noodles and throws them at Vincent who shoots Zack in the head*
Kia- Uh. security! Take away his body and get us a new contestant!
Guy1- No.
Kia- What did you say?
Guy2- Uh, he's being like this today. come on George.
George- No
*Vincent shoots George in the head*
Kia- Damn, that had to hurt. Why did you do that Vincent?
Vincent- He stole my credit card.
Kia- . Well, next we have uh. *points to Sephy*
Kia- Get the hell up here!
Sephy- I knew this was gonna happen. Stupid fortune tellers..
Kia- First off, the history of Sephy. He used the black material to control Cloud for a servent. Making poor cloud scratch his feet every day. Well, enough of that, next contestant. Sephy- How the hell did you find that out?
Kia-...... Internet?
Sephy- Damn the internet, damn the people, damn you Cloud Strife!
Kia- Yeah, I think Cloud posted it.. Anyway, next we have the horrible rapper and cooker, Barret!
*Barret flips out the audience and raps*
Barret- My momma is betta' den yo momma cuz mine makes cookies fo me!
Kia- I'm not even gonna ask.... Well, next we have Cloud fan #1, who studies his every dang move, Tifa Lockheart!
Tifa- Thankies. Thankies.
Kia- Is it true that you put a video camera in his bathroom just to see how long it takes him to use the bathroom?
Tifa- Not just that, but more stuff that some people don't wanna know. *grins happily*
Kia- I'm sure our next contestant would like to know about it. He is Cid Highwind!
Cid- What the @#%*^(@ hell are you talking about. Are you accusing me of being !^%$&^% gay!?
Kia- Yeah.
Cid- @#$% you jackass.
Kia- Next we have a girl who has been revived by authors to many times, so I'm saying this. She is not real Cloud!
*Cloud pouts*
Kia- Aeris Gainsborough's spirit who has no legs!
Aeris- Hi all. Want a flower?
Kia- Sure. *takes a flower and puts it on his stand* And next, we have our last contestant, Yuffie Kisaragi!
Yuffie- Show me da money!
Kia- Well, will our pathetic contestants be able to win the million? Will the real Naniki please stand up? Find out next time on... Uh, what is this called?
Cameraman- Final Fantasy Weakest Link you jackass.
Kia- Uh, what he said!
Authors notes- Yes yes, I know I used tons of different slogans and all but please give me credit. This is my first fic after all. I hoped you liked it, so click the review button and send away! ^-^ *runs into the distance*