Pokemon Lecture
by Martial Arts Master
Pokemon and all related characters copyrighted by Nintendo, Game Freak, Creatures Inc., Satoshi Tajiri, 4Kids, TV Tokyo, and Wizards of the Coast. I made up Otis Orange, though. This takes place after the "For Crying Out Loud" episode that aired today. Now on with the story!
***
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu were walking through yet ANOTHER forest.
"I'm glad we aren't lost this time," Misty said. "Almost every time we walk through a forest, we get lost!"
"Yeah, I'm glad too," Brock said.
"So where are we going, anyway?" Ash asked.
Brock sighed and said, "Ash, didn't I tell you before?"
"No," Ash said matter-of-factly.
Brock sweatdropped.
"Ok, maybe I forgot," Brock said. "Anyway, we're going to a lecture on Pokemon. The instructor's supposed to be this guy called Otis Orange."
"Good, let's go to that lecture!" Ash said. "I love learning new things!"
With that, Ash took off running, and Misty, Brock, and Pikachu had to run, too, to catch up with him.
About 5 minutes later, panting, Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu had finally arrived at a building. The building had a sign on it that said, "Welcome to the Pokemon Researchers building! For a limited time only, come see the famous Pokemon lecture, given by Otis Orange!"
"I guess this is the right place," Misty said.
"Well DUH!" Ash said, and they went inside.
Inside, there was a receptionist.
"Hello there," the receptionist said. "Are you here to see Otis Orange's Pokemon lecture?"
"Yes, we are," Ash answered.
"That'll be a dollar, please," the receptionist said.
Brock sweatdropped. He hadn't known they would have to pay to get in. Grudgingly, he got out a dollar bill and handed it to the receptionist, who took it with a smile.
"Thank you," she said. "The entrance to the lecture is over there are your left."
Ash and his friends looked to their left and saw a door.
"Cool, let's go inside!" Ash said, running in. Again, his friends had to run to catch up with him.
Inside the room were many benches, and they were almost completely filled up. Ash and his friends took the only seats left. They then noticed a fiery-red-haired guy in the center of the room, who was dressed entirely in orange. Orange shirt, orange pants, orange shoes, even orange socks.
"Something tells me orange is this guy's favorite color," Misty said jokingly.
Noticing that the last empty seats were taken, the guy cleared his throat, and everyone went silent.
"As you may have guessed, I am Otis Orange," the guy said.
"Gee, who knew?" Ash whispered rhetorically and sarcastically.
"Now that all of the seats are filled up, let's begin," Otis said. He cleared his throat again, and began.
"Now, the first thing all of you must learn is how to have a balanced team," Otis said. "If, for example, all of your team has one characteristic (like some Gym Leaders), your opponent can use that characteristic against you. But if your Pokemon are all different, you'll be ready for almost anything! I need a volunteer to demonstrate."
Immediately everyone raised their hands, including our heroes.
"You, the girl with the red hair," Otis said, pointing at Misty. "How about you come on up here?"
"Me?!" Misty asked, astonished.
"Yes, you, or do I have to pick another volunteer?" Otis asked.
Misty hastily stood up and walked to Otis.
"Good," Otis said. "Now, show me your team of Pokemon."
"You bet!" Misty said enthusiastically. She set down her Togepi, and then tossed the Poke Balls containing her Pokemon while saying, "Staryu, Goldeen, Psyduck, Poliwag, go!"
Staryu, Goldeen, Psyduck, and Poliwag came out of their Poke Balls. Otis began inspecting them and Togepi.
"Return your Pokemon," he said suddenly.
Confused, Misty called back all her Pokemon and picked up Togepi. Otis turned to the audience.
"Now this young trainer has SORT of a balanced team," Otis said. "Almost all of her Pokemon are Water types, but Togepi is a Normal types. Togepi can handle what her other Pokemon can't, and vice versa. So her team is just barely balanced thanks to Togepi."
Otis motioned for Misty to go back to her seat, and she did.
"However, everyone, sometimes you'll need more balance than that," Otis said. "I shall demonstrate by sending out all of MY Pokemon."
With that, Otis sent some Poke Balls flying, saying, "Go Pokemon!"
Six Pokemon appeared. Everyone noticed a Charizard, a Fearow, a Poliwrath, a Primeape, a Raichu, and a Kadabra.
"Now THIS is a balance of types," Otis said. "Wouldn't you agree, everyone?"
Everyone nodded. Otis, satisfied, recalled the Pokemon.
"Also, when I said you need a balanced team, I didn't just mean balance in type. After all, type isn't everything," Otis continued. "You also need a balanced team in LEVEL! Don't fall into the trap of raising one Pokemon to be a higher level than the others, for if that Pokemon is defeated you'll be left with only weaker-level Pokemon to fight with, and you'll get creamed."
"Pay attention, Ash," Misty whispered, elbowing Ash with a grin on her face. "You could learn a lesson from this."
"Oh shut up," Ash muttered back.
"Quiet you two," Brock whispered.
"I have heard of many trainers who raise one Pokemon to be more powerful than the rest," Otis said. "I heard a tale of a trainer named Otoshi, who raised his Marowak to be much stronger than his Doduo. As a result, when he had to use Doduo instead of Marowak in a battle after Marowak had left him, Doduo was losing and was saved only by the return of Marowak. That is why it is important to train all of your Pokemon equally well."
"I will now move on to the next subject," Otis continued.
"Another thing you need to remember is proper care of Pokemon," Otis said, beginning his next subject. "After all, they have to be in Poke Balls most of the time, so you owe them the opportunity to have some fun. People who use Pokemon only for battles and don't take care of them are gonna get a nasty surprise when their Pokemon either lose all their battles or DIE!"
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu remembered Damian, a nasty trainer who had left his Charmander behind, and when told that Charmander would die if left in the rain, he didn't seem to care. That Charmander was now Ash's Charizard.
Suddenly a trainer with long blue hair, a green shirt, red shorts, and sandals on raised her hand.
"Yes, what is it?" Otis asked, facing her.
"Well, what if you have a Pokemon that's so weak it can't win any battles despite your best efforts?" the trainer asked.
"There IS no Pokemon that's too weak!" Otis snapped. Then he composed himself.
"Here is a motto you should all adhere to," Otis continued. "'Even Magikarps have Tackle and Flail.'" (Author's Note: For those of you who don't know what Flail is, Flail is a new Pokemon Gold/Silver move whose damage is determined by how little HP the user has.)
"What's THAT supposed to mean?" the trainer asked.
"It means every Pokemon has a use, and therefore deserves to be cared for properly," Otis said. "In fact, I think I'll demonstrate. I'll take suggestions for which Pokemon appear to be useless, and I'll explain their uses."
"My Psyduck is almost completely useless!" Misty shouted immediately. "If it weren't for its headache-triggered Confusion and Disable attacks, I'd have left it behind a long time ago!"
"What you apparently don't realize, young lady, is that Psyducks can be trained to use those attacks at will," Otis said.
Misty then remembered Marina's Psyduck, who had proven this very fact by creaming her Staryu with Confusion, sending Staryu's own Water Gun back against it. But Otis wasn't finished.
"Also, Psyducks also have the Hydro Pump attack," Otis continued, "which is the most powerful Water-type attack there is!"
"Well, what about Vulpix?" another trainer asked. "Vulpixes seem to be weak."
"You obviously don't know about Vulpix's Confuse Ray," Otis replied. "With that alone, some Vulpix trainers have won matches by confusing opponents' Pokemon and then defeating them with Vulpix's other attacks."
"What about Metapods and Kakunas?" asked another trainer. "All they know is Harden, so they're useless in battle."
Otis frowned, and said, "Not many people realize this, but if you train Caterpies and Weedles until they evolve into Metapods and Kakunas, they won't lose their Tackle and String Shot attacks, in Caterpie's case, or their Poison Sting and String Shot attacks, in Weedle's case."
Someone with a blue shirt and a white bandanna, who Ash recognized as one of the trainers who had beaten Lapras with sticks, said, "Well, Lapras sucks."
"Lapras, too, has Confuse Ray," Otis said. "Trainers sometimes use the same strategies with Lapras as they do with Vulpix, plus Lapras has those Water and Ice type attacks."
Seeing as no one else was offering anything, Otis said, "I reiterate: NO POKEMON IS COMPLETELY USELESS!"
"Now, as for evolution stones," Otis said. "It is all right to use an evolution stone on your Pokemon, but ONLY if you ask the Pokemon first. If you force it to evolve without asking it first, it may get mad at you and not listen to you."
"It also might make them grateful that you didn't waste time asking them before making them stronger," another trainer snapped.
"True, but it's best not to take a risk," Otis replied. He checked his watch.
"I am almost out of time, so I will move on to the two most important things about Pokemon," he continued. He turned to a middle-aged woman dressed in the latest fashions and said, "What do you think is more important about a Pokemon: how good it looks, or how well its inner strength is doing?"
"Good looks, of course!" the middle-aged woman said. "I mean after all, what's the point of showing off Pokemon if they don't look good?"
"Wrong, wrong, WRONG!" Otis snapped. "If you think the outside is more important than the inside, you shouldn't even be a Pokemon trainer! If all one cares about is a Pokemon's looks, a Pokemon won't be happy, and its inner strength will be lost."
"But sometimes Pokemon like to get dressed up!" Misty called.
"How do you know?" Otis asked, turning to her. "Did you ever ASK them?"
Misty's face turned beet red, and after a few minutes, she sadly admitted, "No."
"Well, there you go then," Otis said. "You judge Pokemon by appearances, so you train Water Pokemon because most of them are 'cute', but that is a mistake. Think about that after this lecture."
Misty nodded, and it was Ash's turn to elbow her and grin, remembering how she had preferred Salon Rocke's methods over Susie's methods, even though all Jessie and James cared about were pretty faces.
"My final lesson is THE most important one," Otis said. "It can be summed up in a simple word: knowledge."
That got confused looks on everyone's faces.
"Knowledge is the most important thing about Pokemon training," Otis said. "If you have full knowledge of a Pokemon, not only will you have more options in battles but you also will be better able to take care of that Pokemon."
"For example, everyone knows a Pikachu's Electric attacks, but they know jack about more obscure attacks like Swift and Light Screen!" Otis continued. "And everybody knows about a Staryu's Water Gun, Tackle, and Swift attacks, but they know nothing of Recover, which can save matches for more knowledgable trainers thanks to its ability to recover health, or Light Screen, which offers protection against special attacks like Water, Fire, Electric, Ice, Psychic, Grass, Dragon, and Dark type attacks."
"My lecture's over now, so if you will all line up and walk out the door, I can get ready to lecture others like yourselves," Otis finished.
7 minutes later...
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu were sitting on a bench, thinking about the lecture.
Ash turned to Misty and said, "Well, I hope you learned something about judging Pokemon by their appearances!"
"And I hope you learned something about favoritism!" Misty said.
"I don't favor Pikachu, if that's what you're implying!" Ash retorted.
"Wanna bet?" Misty challenged.
"If I favored Pikachu, my other Pokemon wouldn't stay with me!" Ash shouted back.
"If you didn't favor Pikachu, why did Chikorita once get jealous of it?" Misty asked bitingly. (Author's Note: See the Chikorita's Big Upset episode, which also aired today, for details on that incident.)
"Just because it THOUGHT I favored Pikachu doesn't mean I DO!" Ash retorted.
Brock and Pikachu sighed. This was going to be a long day.
The End
***
E-mail all questions and comments to bleifer@msn.com.
by Martial Arts Master
Pokemon and all related characters copyrighted by Nintendo, Game Freak, Creatures Inc., Satoshi Tajiri, 4Kids, TV Tokyo, and Wizards of the Coast. I made up Otis Orange, though. This takes place after the "For Crying Out Loud" episode that aired today. Now on with the story!
***
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu were walking through yet ANOTHER forest.
"I'm glad we aren't lost this time," Misty said. "Almost every time we walk through a forest, we get lost!"
"Yeah, I'm glad too," Brock said.
"So where are we going, anyway?" Ash asked.
Brock sighed and said, "Ash, didn't I tell you before?"
"No," Ash said matter-of-factly.
Brock sweatdropped.
"Ok, maybe I forgot," Brock said. "Anyway, we're going to a lecture on Pokemon. The instructor's supposed to be this guy called Otis Orange."
"Good, let's go to that lecture!" Ash said. "I love learning new things!"
With that, Ash took off running, and Misty, Brock, and Pikachu had to run, too, to catch up with him.
About 5 minutes later, panting, Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu had finally arrived at a building. The building had a sign on it that said, "Welcome to the Pokemon Researchers building! For a limited time only, come see the famous Pokemon lecture, given by Otis Orange!"
"I guess this is the right place," Misty said.
"Well DUH!" Ash said, and they went inside.
Inside, there was a receptionist.
"Hello there," the receptionist said. "Are you here to see Otis Orange's Pokemon lecture?"
"Yes, we are," Ash answered.
"That'll be a dollar, please," the receptionist said.
Brock sweatdropped. He hadn't known they would have to pay to get in. Grudgingly, he got out a dollar bill and handed it to the receptionist, who took it with a smile.
"Thank you," she said. "The entrance to the lecture is over there are your left."
Ash and his friends looked to their left and saw a door.
"Cool, let's go inside!" Ash said, running in. Again, his friends had to run to catch up with him.
Inside the room were many benches, and they were almost completely filled up. Ash and his friends took the only seats left. They then noticed a fiery-red-haired guy in the center of the room, who was dressed entirely in orange. Orange shirt, orange pants, orange shoes, even orange socks.
"Something tells me orange is this guy's favorite color," Misty said jokingly.
Noticing that the last empty seats were taken, the guy cleared his throat, and everyone went silent.
"As you may have guessed, I am Otis Orange," the guy said.
"Gee, who knew?" Ash whispered rhetorically and sarcastically.
"Now that all of the seats are filled up, let's begin," Otis said. He cleared his throat again, and began.
"Now, the first thing all of you must learn is how to have a balanced team," Otis said. "If, for example, all of your team has one characteristic (like some Gym Leaders), your opponent can use that characteristic against you. But if your Pokemon are all different, you'll be ready for almost anything! I need a volunteer to demonstrate."
Immediately everyone raised their hands, including our heroes.
"You, the girl with the red hair," Otis said, pointing at Misty. "How about you come on up here?"
"Me?!" Misty asked, astonished.
"Yes, you, or do I have to pick another volunteer?" Otis asked.
Misty hastily stood up and walked to Otis.
"Good," Otis said. "Now, show me your team of Pokemon."
"You bet!" Misty said enthusiastically. She set down her Togepi, and then tossed the Poke Balls containing her Pokemon while saying, "Staryu, Goldeen, Psyduck, Poliwag, go!"
Staryu, Goldeen, Psyduck, and Poliwag came out of their Poke Balls. Otis began inspecting them and Togepi.
"Return your Pokemon," he said suddenly.
Confused, Misty called back all her Pokemon and picked up Togepi. Otis turned to the audience.
"Now this young trainer has SORT of a balanced team," Otis said. "Almost all of her Pokemon are Water types, but Togepi is a Normal types. Togepi can handle what her other Pokemon can't, and vice versa. So her team is just barely balanced thanks to Togepi."
Otis motioned for Misty to go back to her seat, and she did.
"However, everyone, sometimes you'll need more balance than that," Otis said. "I shall demonstrate by sending out all of MY Pokemon."
With that, Otis sent some Poke Balls flying, saying, "Go Pokemon!"
Six Pokemon appeared. Everyone noticed a Charizard, a Fearow, a Poliwrath, a Primeape, a Raichu, and a Kadabra.
"Now THIS is a balance of types," Otis said. "Wouldn't you agree, everyone?"
Everyone nodded. Otis, satisfied, recalled the Pokemon.
"Also, when I said you need a balanced team, I didn't just mean balance in type. After all, type isn't everything," Otis continued. "You also need a balanced team in LEVEL! Don't fall into the trap of raising one Pokemon to be a higher level than the others, for if that Pokemon is defeated you'll be left with only weaker-level Pokemon to fight with, and you'll get creamed."
"Pay attention, Ash," Misty whispered, elbowing Ash with a grin on her face. "You could learn a lesson from this."
"Oh shut up," Ash muttered back.
"Quiet you two," Brock whispered.
"I have heard of many trainers who raise one Pokemon to be more powerful than the rest," Otis said. "I heard a tale of a trainer named Otoshi, who raised his Marowak to be much stronger than his Doduo. As a result, when he had to use Doduo instead of Marowak in a battle after Marowak had left him, Doduo was losing and was saved only by the return of Marowak. That is why it is important to train all of your Pokemon equally well."
"I will now move on to the next subject," Otis continued.
"Another thing you need to remember is proper care of Pokemon," Otis said, beginning his next subject. "After all, they have to be in Poke Balls most of the time, so you owe them the opportunity to have some fun. People who use Pokemon only for battles and don't take care of them are gonna get a nasty surprise when their Pokemon either lose all their battles or DIE!"
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu remembered Damian, a nasty trainer who had left his Charmander behind, and when told that Charmander would die if left in the rain, he didn't seem to care. That Charmander was now Ash's Charizard.
Suddenly a trainer with long blue hair, a green shirt, red shorts, and sandals on raised her hand.
"Yes, what is it?" Otis asked, facing her.
"Well, what if you have a Pokemon that's so weak it can't win any battles despite your best efforts?" the trainer asked.
"There IS no Pokemon that's too weak!" Otis snapped. Then he composed himself.
"Here is a motto you should all adhere to," Otis continued. "'Even Magikarps have Tackle and Flail.'" (Author's Note: For those of you who don't know what Flail is, Flail is a new Pokemon Gold/Silver move whose damage is determined by how little HP the user has.)
"What's THAT supposed to mean?" the trainer asked.
"It means every Pokemon has a use, and therefore deserves to be cared for properly," Otis said. "In fact, I think I'll demonstrate. I'll take suggestions for which Pokemon appear to be useless, and I'll explain their uses."
"My Psyduck is almost completely useless!" Misty shouted immediately. "If it weren't for its headache-triggered Confusion and Disable attacks, I'd have left it behind a long time ago!"
"What you apparently don't realize, young lady, is that Psyducks can be trained to use those attacks at will," Otis said.
Misty then remembered Marina's Psyduck, who had proven this very fact by creaming her Staryu with Confusion, sending Staryu's own Water Gun back against it. But Otis wasn't finished.
"Also, Psyducks also have the Hydro Pump attack," Otis continued, "which is the most powerful Water-type attack there is!"
"Well, what about Vulpix?" another trainer asked. "Vulpixes seem to be weak."
"You obviously don't know about Vulpix's Confuse Ray," Otis replied. "With that alone, some Vulpix trainers have won matches by confusing opponents' Pokemon and then defeating them with Vulpix's other attacks."
"What about Metapods and Kakunas?" asked another trainer. "All they know is Harden, so they're useless in battle."
Otis frowned, and said, "Not many people realize this, but if you train Caterpies and Weedles until they evolve into Metapods and Kakunas, they won't lose their Tackle and String Shot attacks, in Caterpie's case, or their Poison Sting and String Shot attacks, in Weedle's case."
Someone with a blue shirt and a white bandanna, who Ash recognized as one of the trainers who had beaten Lapras with sticks, said, "Well, Lapras sucks."
"Lapras, too, has Confuse Ray," Otis said. "Trainers sometimes use the same strategies with Lapras as they do with Vulpix, plus Lapras has those Water and Ice type attacks."
Seeing as no one else was offering anything, Otis said, "I reiterate: NO POKEMON IS COMPLETELY USELESS!"
"Now, as for evolution stones," Otis said. "It is all right to use an evolution stone on your Pokemon, but ONLY if you ask the Pokemon first. If you force it to evolve without asking it first, it may get mad at you and not listen to you."
"It also might make them grateful that you didn't waste time asking them before making them stronger," another trainer snapped.
"True, but it's best not to take a risk," Otis replied. He checked his watch.
"I am almost out of time, so I will move on to the two most important things about Pokemon," he continued. He turned to a middle-aged woman dressed in the latest fashions and said, "What do you think is more important about a Pokemon: how good it looks, or how well its inner strength is doing?"
"Good looks, of course!" the middle-aged woman said. "I mean after all, what's the point of showing off Pokemon if they don't look good?"
"Wrong, wrong, WRONG!" Otis snapped. "If you think the outside is more important than the inside, you shouldn't even be a Pokemon trainer! If all one cares about is a Pokemon's looks, a Pokemon won't be happy, and its inner strength will be lost."
"But sometimes Pokemon like to get dressed up!" Misty called.
"How do you know?" Otis asked, turning to her. "Did you ever ASK them?"
Misty's face turned beet red, and after a few minutes, she sadly admitted, "No."
"Well, there you go then," Otis said. "You judge Pokemon by appearances, so you train Water Pokemon because most of them are 'cute', but that is a mistake. Think about that after this lecture."
Misty nodded, and it was Ash's turn to elbow her and grin, remembering how she had preferred Salon Rocke's methods over Susie's methods, even though all Jessie and James cared about were pretty faces.
"My final lesson is THE most important one," Otis said. "It can be summed up in a simple word: knowledge."
That got confused looks on everyone's faces.
"Knowledge is the most important thing about Pokemon training," Otis said. "If you have full knowledge of a Pokemon, not only will you have more options in battles but you also will be better able to take care of that Pokemon."
"For example, everyone knows a Pikachu's Electric attacks, but they know jack about more obscure attacks like Swift and Light Screen!" Otis continued. "And everybody knows about a Staryu's Water Gun, Tackle, and Swift attacks, but they know nothing of Recover, which can save matches for more knowledgable trainers thanks to its ability to recover health, or Light Screen, which offers protection against special attacks like Water, Fire, Electric, Ice, Psychic, Grass, Dragon, and Dark type attacks."
"My lecture's over now, so if you will all line up and walk out the door, I can get ready to lecture others like yourselves," Otis finished.
7 minutes later...
Ash, Misty, Brock, and Pikachu were sitting on a bench, thinking about the lecture.
Ash turned to Misty and said, "Well, I hope you learned something about judging Pokemon by their appearances!"
"And I hope you learned something about favoritism!" Misty said.
"I don't favor Pikachu, if that's what you're implying!" Ash retorted.
"Wanna bet?" Misty challenged.
"If I favored Pikachu, my other Pokemon wouldn't stay with me!" Ash shouted back.
"If you didn't favor Pikachu, why did Chikorita once get jealous of it?" Misty asked bitingly. (Author's Note: See the Chikorita's Big Upset episode, which also aired today, for details on that incident.)
"Just because it THOUGHT I favored Pikachu doesn't mean I DO!" Ash retorted.
Brock and Pikachu sighed. This was going to be a long day.
The End
***
E-mail all questions and comments to bleifer@msn.com.