He awoke abruptly to the sound of his cell buzzing against the wooden coffee table. Rubbing his eyes, he cursed the device for interrupting his much needed sleep. He'd only recently been discharged from hospital after having returned from the dead, and though he'd done his best to hide it from Scully, the experience had seriously taken its toll on both his body and psyche.
"Mulder" He yawned down the line.
"Mulder, it's me. I need your help, can you come over?"
She sounded distressed.
He bolted upright, adrenaline surging as he grabbed blindly for the car keys. His heavily pregnant lover, the most important woman in his entire life had also recently become the object of his worst nightmares. Time and time again he'd find himself thrown harshly awake at the sight of her mutilated body left for dead, their enigmatic child absent from the picture.
"What is it Scully, what's wrong?" He panicked, fearing the worst.
"I'm fine, Mulder, it's this damn cot mobile, it's making me want to rip my hair out. In fact I've got a whole stack of unboxed baby things that I've yet to tackle. I was wondering… if maybe…"
"I'll be right over."
He flicked the cell closed tossing it back on the coffee table. Relief washed over him as he pulled himself up off of the coach and searched his apartment for a clean shirt.
He still had no idea how to comprehend the baby situation. He'd prepared himself to be a 'hands on' father back when they were trying fertility treatment and she'd asked him to be her donor. He'd accepted the offer gladly, knowing that it would make her infinitely happy. This pregnency however, this was unplanned, it was a miracle, their miracle, and he wished he knew how to appreciate it as such.
He pulled up outside her house less than an hour after he'd hung up the phone, and found her amongst a pile of partly assembled fixtures and half a dozen screwdrivers dotted amongst the scene.
"You look like you could do with a break" Mulder smiled, "Coffee?"
She nodded, flopping into the nearest chair.
Mulder placed the kettle on the stove and searched her cupboards for the sachets.
"I'm on decaf now" She yelled from the other room.
Oh yeah, of course, he thought to himself as he found the tin of individually packed coffee grounds. He returned to her moments later with two steaming mugs in hand.
"Thanks" She murmured as he sunk beside her.
She took a sip before turning to him, "Thanks for coming over. I've been working so much recently I haven't really kept on top of all this" She gestured to the pile of baby things.
"Not long now before 'junior' here makes an appearance, huh?"
"I know" She smiled, "It's all happening so fast..."
"You anxious?" He asked without really thinking.
"I'm terrified"
He knew she wasn't referring to the birth. She'd tackle that as she tackled everything else, methodically, sensibly, controlled. Or, as much as you could do when it came to pushing out a baby. It was what followed that they both feared most. The future of their child was already tainted; he'd been marked since conception. His safety was in their hands; in more ways than any parent could ever envision.
"How are you doing?" Scully probed, clearly talking about his discharge from Maryland Naval.
"Fine." He replied bluntly.
"The nightmares?"
"Gone" He lied.
"Surgical scars?"
"Completely healed" This time he told the truth; the physical ones had certainly disappeared but he couldn't honestly say the same for the marks left on his conscience.
He'd insisted she take a step down from acting as his personal physician despite her protests otherwise. He wanted her to focus her energy on the baby, not on whether his white cell count was back on track. Instead he'd assured her he'd attend all of his check ups, and jump through all of the hoops necessary to be cleared for fieldwork once more.
Mulder made a face as he took a swig of coffee.
"You enjoy this stuff?" He cringed.
She smiled, and when she didn't answer Mulder set to work on the array of brackets and woodwork that was supposed to somehow resemble a highchair.
"Don't fret Scully, I'm great with my hands. We'll have all this up and running in no time at all"
She rolled her eyes, thankful for his efforts yet painfully aware of his complete incompetence when it came to DIY. She loved him for trying.
He knelt down, trying to figure out where on earth to start and she couldn't help smirk a little.
The baby inside her came alive with movement as she placed her hand over her belly, content knowing he was protected within her.
"He's definitely yours, Mulder. Relentlessly restless"
"He's kicking?" Mulder looked up.
"More like playing a soccer match with my insides"
Mulder grinned, "Can I…?"
"Sure, come here"
She took his hand gently and placed it where hers had lay so that he could feel the flutter of movement.
"My god, Scully…" He breathed, "He's really moving in there"
"Tell me about it" She agreed, pretending the novelty was wearing off, but she couldn't kid herself; it was the greatest feeling in the world.
He crouched a little lower to her tummy, "Go easy on your Mom, kid, she's been through a lot these last few months, what with me flying around New Mexico with ET" He joked.
He rose to full height and studied the redhead beside him remembering how much he missed her, and how the thought of seeing her again was the only thing that kept him alive in that horrific place.
"I'll finish this," He suggested, suddenly having an appreciation of just how tiring carrying their son around must be.
She didn't look convinced, more concerned for his own wellbeing.
"You take a long bath, relax, I've got this baby stuff under control. Trust me."
She let herself indulge in the bath for far longer than usual. She'd been on edge with worry for so long she'd forgotten how to take it easy. Draining the water, she pulled her robe over her shoulders fastening it loosely around her bump and padded into the living room. She vaguely wondered what state of chaos she'd find him in.
It was dark out now, evening but not too late. The streetlight shone in through the partly drawn curtains to reveal the outline of a fully assembled cot. He'd even fixed the baby mobile that had driven her crazy for the majority of the afternoon. The little flying saucers drifted in circles above the empty cot. She was impressed. The remainder of boxes lay untouched indicating he'd come to a grinding halt with the success of the first attempt, but still she was pleased with the result.
She moved into the room and turned the lamp on the coffee table on low. Mulder lay sprawled on the coach snoozing silently with an arm rested across his face. As frustrating as it was having to deal with his depression and emotional distress when he first came back to them, she loved this man to the edges of earth and beyond. She was struggling to understand him right now as he fought hard to find his place amongst a world that had moved on and left him behind. She wanted to act as if nothing had happened, wanted to erase those months of his pain and her inexorable searching.
She covered him with a fleecy blanket and tucked a strand of wayward hair out of his face before planting a soft kiss on his forehead. She whispered the three words that were rarely spoken between them, words that didn't need saying; after all, they'd always loved one another, they just hadn't always appreciated the extent of that love.