She was finally alone. Her mom wasn't around to chastise practically everything she did. No Octavia to do nothing but glare at her. No Bellamy to convince her to go back. No Lexa to break her trust. She was free. Free to do anything she wanted without having to worry about her friends. It was the first time since the drop ship had landed that she felt truly free. And she was loving every minute of it.
She didn't know where she would go yet, she didn't feel welcome back at camp Jaha and she would never look at any of them the same. Not without feeling the guilt for what she did in Mount Weather. Going to Lexa was not an option. The commander had betrayed her trust, left Clarke and her people alone to die. She would never be forgiven. Clarke was sure of that. So, she was currently resting inside the drop ship that had originally brought the hundred juvenile's to Earth. It was funny, really. She never would have thought that she would be back here. She wondered what would have happened if the grounders had not broken their alliance. Maybe they would have been able to rescue their people without so many deaths. The blonde shook her head. She should not think about it. She did what she had to, and now it is over. Life will go on. Her friends are safe at camp, and she was no longer a problem for them. She let out a sigh, deciding that she needed to sleep now that night was coming. So, she shuffled into a laying position and closed her eyes, sleep soon overtaking.
It was only a few hours before Clarke was woke by nightmares. She dreamed about what had happened in Mount Weather. What she did to so many innocent people. She was haunted by their spirits, and she couldn't seem to shake it off. She had too much blood on her hands. Clarke found herself beginning to wish that her mother was here, to offer comforting words. But that would never happen. Abby wouldn't look at Clarke the same, knowing she killed so many innocent people. It did not matter that their people were saved, so many died inside that mountain. They could have been spared. If Clarke had only waited another minute for Jasper to kill Cane. Clarke had to stop herself from bursting in to tears. She had to be strong. And for once, it was for her. Not for the people that looked up to her. She needed to be strong for herself. If she cried, she would break. And she wouldn't return. If she was to survive out here alone, she needed to be strong.
Only a moment later, and the sound of metal clattering outside startled Clarke. She hesitated before rising to her feet, her heart beating faster as she looked around for any kind of weapon. She mentally berated herself for not bringing a gun from camp with her. She had no way to defend herself if she was attacked. Cautiously, she reached out for a metal pipe near the ladders to the upper floor. But, before she could grab the pipe, a reaper ran into the drop ship. It didn't take long for Clarke to be pinned down, but she desperately fought against the reaper. She tried to shove on his chest, but the reaper was a lot stronger than her. The only thing Clarke could think of was the pipe. She needed that to get the reaper off of her. She reached out with her left hand, but she was too far away. She tried to struggle to the pipe, but it was no use. The reaper was trying to bite her neck, and was almost successful but Clarke kneed him in the stomach, temporarily winding him. She pushed the reaper off before rolling for the pipe. Not long after, the reaper was on his feet and towering over Clarke. The girl quickly got to her feet and readied herself to hit the reaper with the pipe, but before she had the chance, the reaper couched up blood into her face before dropping to the ground. She studied the dagger protruding from his back before looking up to up t the entrance to the drop ship just in time to see an unfamiliar grounder run out. She quickly followed out into the open, but she was alone. The grounder was no where to be seen.
Clarke had since returned into the drop ship and disposed of the reaper's body. She sat by the ladders, fiddling with the dagger. She could not figure out why a grounder would want to save her. The only grounders that seemed to like her were some of those from the Woods Clan under Lexa's command. But after what happened the other night, it could not have been any of the commander's warriors. Surely. Just to be sure, Clarke decided it was best to confront Lexa. She needed to know. And if it was Lexa, she needed the commander to understand that she no longer wanted anything to do with her. Or the other grounders. She could protect herself. She needed to protect herself.
With her mind made up, she finally stood up as the sun was beginning to rise. If she went to speak to the grounder commander now, she would be able to try and find food before dark tonight. So, the girl took her first steps outside the drop ship since the reaper had attacked. She took in a breath of fresh air, taking a moment to appreciate the beauty of the forest. Skeletons of burned grounders still somewhat scattered the clearing, but new grass was beginning to grow. And even some flowers. She had never had a chance to enjoy her surroundings. It had always been about surviving or looking out for her people. So she took advantage of the moment before she set off to Tondc where Lexa was most likely to be. She made sure that she was not being followed, and she remained quiet as she trekked through the woods. She stayed alert, almost continuously looking around to make sure the grounder from the night did not return. She had a weapon now, so she could at least defend herself.
The journey to Tondc was fairly quiet. Only the sound of leaves rustling and birds chirping in the trees filled her ears. But the journey also went quick, and before she knew it she was standing in the middle of Tondc surrounding by grounders about to attack her.
"I want to speak with Lexa," Clarke explained.
The grounders looked as though they did not care. They were ready to attack her when Indra called them off.
"I will fetch the commander," she told Clarke before disappearing in to a hut.
The grounders that were previously surrounding here dispersed, but still sent glares her way. Some of them nodded to her, the ones who didn't hate her anyway. Clarke ignored the grounders for now and tried to listen in to the conversation in the hut Indra had disappeared into. She recognized both Indra and Lexa's voices, but she could not understand what they were saying. She caught 'Klarke kom Skaikru' since she knew what that meant, but she had no idea about the rest of the conversation. But the one line indicated that Indra was telling the commander that Clarke had come to see her. It was only a few more moments when Indra exited the hut, a cold gaze on her face. She nodded to Clarke before heading further in to the village. The girl took it as the go ahead, so she entered the hut and was met with Lexa sitting on her Throne, playing with the dagger she always carried.
"Why are you here, Clarke?" the commander asked.
She was glad that the girl had come, but she was unsure of her intentions. She assumed that after the deal she made with the Mountain Men, that Clarke would never wish to speak with her again.
"You should know why I am here." Clarke began, her face now angry.
Lexa was taken aback by the blonde's abrupt start to the conversation. She looked at the girl with a slight confused expression. Was this about the deal? It had to be, it was the only thing she could think of.
"I am sorry for what I did, but I was thinking about my people. I had to-" Lexa began, but was soon cut off when Clarke raised a hand.
"No. That is not why I am here." Clarke said, assertiveness lacing her tone. "You sent a warrior to follow me to the drop ship. He killed a reaper that was attacking me last night."
Lexa's brow raised slightly. "I can assure you that I had nothing to do with this."
"Then why would he try and protect me? None of the Clan leaders like me enough to send someone to keep me safe. And your warriors would not do something like that without orders." Clarke retaliated, fuming at the fact that Lexa was trying to deny this.
"I have ordered my warriors to stay away from all Sky people." Lexa replied, shaking her head. "I do not know who would want to disregard orders to keep you safe , but it would be best to return to your camp. More reaper's may come if you're alone again." She added, now wondering why Clarke was alone at the drop ship to begin with.
Before Lexa had a chance to say anything else, Clarke had dismissed herself. She would not listen to Lexa's lies any longer. Why should she believe anything that traitor said anyway? She could not be trusted. Coming here was a bad idea, it had just made Clarke mad and gave her nothing as to why someone felt the need to protect her. Clarke let out an exasperated breath before leaving the village. She needed to be alone. She only felt safe when she was alone. She had no one else to worry about and could think about herself for a change.
Now back in to the woods, Clarke made no effort to be quiet. She did not care. She was angry. Angry at Lexa. Angry at herself. Angry at everything. The blonde let out a groan when she felt spots of rain drip on her head. She picked up the pace, not wanting to get stuck out in a storm. Before long, the rain was pouring and thunder clashed above her head. The sky grew dark as grey clouds engulfed it. Every so often, a strike of lightening would brighten up the sky but it was no better. Clarke had no idea where she was walking. She didn't know if she was going in the right direction or if she was anywhere near the drop ship. She had completely lost her bearings. She had let her mind wander off, and now she was stuck in the rain. There was no where to go, so she sat at the base of a tree. She hugged her knees tightly to her chest before burying her head into her lap, drying to drown out the terrifying sounds of rain thumping down around her and the thunder echoing through the sky. Maybe being alone was not really that great after all.
Clarke stayed there until the rain stopped, unable to see the dark figure watching her from a distance. He made no effort to hide himself. The storm did not bother him. Clarke needed to be kept safe. He knew she would not survive on her own, so he needed to keep her safe. He kept at a distance, just watching Clarke. He did not need to take his eyes off of her. He was trained well enough to know when danger was near that he did not even have to look around.
If Clarke had looked up, she would have seen the grounder watching her. She would have seen his dark brown hair, his piercing green eyes and the black paint around his eyes now running down his face. If she had looked up, she would have seen the man that saved her.
But she did not look up. She stayed where she was until the rain subsided. She was not strong. She was weak. She was scared of the storm. She wanted to go home. But she could not stand to go back. She still felt guilty about what she did, and she had not seen her friends since they escaped two days ago. She needed more than two days. It was not enough time for her to be okay with what she did. Perhaps she will never be okay with it. She was a monster. She would be alone forever. Clarke allowed herself to be weak. She allowed herself to sob. She let her body tremble from both the cold rain and the crying as she was forced to accept that this could be her life. Alone and afraid. There was nothing she could do about it.
AN: So, thanks for reading. I just managed to catch up on season two, so I just finished it and I could not help but wonder what Clarke would do alone. So, I kind of explore a little bit on her feelings and how she will manage to survive. More characters in chapters to come, but the focus will be on Clarke, and I may explore the relationships with Bellamy and Lexa. But I will say this right now, Clexa is most likely going to be end game.
I think you will be able to figure it out, but 'Klarke kom Skaikru' means Clarke of the Sky people.