A/N- This is my first oneshot. Ever. I hope it's really good. By the way this is plot...actually I already erased this plot from my yellow notebook...I don't know what number it is now...I'm sad!! T.T Oh well, anyways,I just now came up with the title. Don't forget to vote in the poll on my profile~!!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. And if I did, Sasuke and Naruto would be in love. Madly in love.
God shook his head sadly down at the boy who was leaving to join his parents. If he did, the other one would be here as well. He turned away.
"Naruto! Naruto open up!" Sakura called, banging on his apartment door.
Kakashi sighed and opened the door.
"Naruto!" Sakura was the first one in there. "Where are you?" she said, worried. She was nervous for her friend, he was no where in sight. That was why team seven was summoned to the Hokage's office, Naruto went missing, that's why they were in his apartment looking for him. "Naruto!" she called again anxiously.
Sasuke looked around the room, it was clean. Where did that dobe go? he thought, rolling his eyes. Naruto didn't show up for training that morning not even after they had waited for a while. That's when an Anbu had summoned them to the Hokage's. Tdunadehad seemed very worried that something was so seriously wrong because a villager had reported seeing Naruto leave the village secretively. Now why would he do that?
Kakashi sighed again and put a hand on Sakura's shoulder to consol her, but it barely worked, she was very concerned over Naruto's whereabouts. "Sakura, Naruto's not here. I can't see any trace of a struggle." he explained, "That can only mean Naruto ran of his own free will." He sighed again. What was that boy thinking?
Sakura looked at her sensei anxiously and sad, "Why would he run away sensei? You don't suppose something happened to him, do you?" Naruto seemed fine yesterday. The same as everyday, happy and bright. Soemthing must've happened last night. Or maybe they were just being paranoid and Naruto went out for a morning walk. A very long one too.
"It is Naruto, the dobe must have his own reasons." Sasuke said. And he said it as if he didn't care. "I'm sure he'll be back." He continued to look around Naruto's unusually tidy room. Naruto wasn't exactly the type of person you'd call "clean".
Kakashi shook his head, "I wouldn't be so sure of that Sasuke. You don't see? There are a few items that are missing. Items that are used for survival in a runaway." he explained.
Sasuke looked around the room again, Kakashi was right, a few things were missing. He looked at the nightstand next to his bed, the silver picture frame that usually held the team picture was still there, but the picture wasn't. Why would he take that?
Sakura was very sad, her friend ran away and they didn't know why. "Kakashi-sensei, what are we going to do?" she asked worriedly. "If Naruto's gone, then shouldn't we go after him?"
"Right now, we should go report our findings to Tsunade-sama. Sasuke," he looked at Kakashi, "Stay here and see if you can find anything that could help. Turn the place upside down if you have to." he said. "Sakura, you and I will go to the Hokage."
Sakura nodded and left. Kakashi and Sasuke stared at each other. After some still and extensive body language communication, Kakashi left behind Sakura. The door clicked shut and Sasuke turned to face the rest of the apartment.
"Tch…" Sasuke sighed. For once, the dobe decided to clean. Probably didn't want to leave anything that could help us… Figures.
Sasuke looked in several places in the room, under the bed, in the closet, kitchen, under the table, hidden in the window seal. He couldn't find anything. The room was practically spotless. But even Sasuke knew Naruto wasn't that good at concealing hidden things, and no one else had been in here before team, Sasuke hadn't sensed any trace of foreign chakra.
He looked at the nightstand for a moment before walking over to it and opening its drawers. Scrolls, weapons, chopsticks, a red book, more scrolls, a few trinkets. That was all. Sasuke grabbed the red book, it seemed like a notebook or journal of some kind. The dobe wrote? Let's see… He opened it to see little funny doodles and Naruto's name in big orange letters on the first page. Bingo.
Sasuke began to read it. The first entry was dated when they had became team seven… Sasuke took a seat on Naruto's bed and leaned against the wall.
June 6
I can't believe it! (Well actually I can, but let's not get technical) I'm finally on my way to being the greatest Shinobi and the Hokage! This is gonna be great! I'll finally show them that I'm worthy! After stealing that scroll-
Wait, you mean that was Naruto who stole that? he thought in surprise. He remembered hearing that a sacred scroll had been stolen, though he never got a name.
-I learned a really great jutsu that's gonna blow 'em all away! But on the down side, I now know the reason all the villagers hate me, even if it wasn't my fault!
But I'll show them! I'll show them all, I'll be the greatest Hokage ever and they'll have to stop treating me like dirt.
Naruto
It was relatively short. Sasuke hoped the whole journal wouldn't be like this, chanting about Hokage on every page. He flipped it, the next one was dated about a week later…
June 15
Even though I'm a real Shinobi now, the villagers still treat me like crap! It's really starting to get on my nerves. Not like I do much about it anyways, if I kill one of them, it'll just make them all say that they were right about me. They're NOT, I'm NOT a monster.
Sigh…
Lately, I've been getting really lonely at night… Even though I've lived alone all my life, I never ever get used to the cold silence around here… I've never been able to laugh at the T.V. with my dad, never been able to bother my mom when she was cooking… That cold, cold silence at night makes me wanna go insane. The pain that I bear feels like too much for me.
Ah…man, I can be so freaking selfish sometimes huh? I just read over what I wrote. I'm being a big baby. At least I know I fucking saved this goddamned village from its ultimate destruction.
Those ungrateful people should be treating me like their savior! After all that's what Yondaime Hokage wanted for me, right? You'd think I'd get the respect I deserve. But no, I'm just a damn demon to all of them, my dad gets all the credit. Not that I don't love my dad…I mean he was pretty great for saving the village and all…but why? Why the hell did it have to be me?!
You know, I bet if that damned fox was sealed up inside someone else, take one of those fuckers for example, they'd be bitchin' about it too! But no, it's not right for me to say that, the fox is in me and I just gotta deal with it.
Naruto
Wow… Sasuke thought, he stared at that one for a while, wondering how all the other ones would be. He's right though…if the fox would've been in me, I probably wouldn't act the way I do now… Sasuke shifted into a more comfortable position on the bed. He was starting to feel some guilt and pity for his teammate. How come he'd never mentioned anything before? Naruto was usually so happy, it all couldn't have be a mask, could it?
He flipped the page. It was ripped in parts and kind of wrinkled. Ink splatter was everywhere and some of it was smeared because it had gotten a little wet. The next entry was dated quite a few months after the last…
November 22
Some of the other Genin in the village have been practically forcing me to play a game with them. They don't know I'm the fox, and getta load of this, the game's called Hunt the Fox. Even though they don't know that's me, I'm always they fox. Not that I really mind, I guess…sometimes I win, but others…
I hope all my cuts and other stuff heal before training again… If Sasuke-teme sees them, the bastard will never let me live it down. I know it…not that he's a bad person, but seriously, looking down on me all the time? I value his friendship and our rivalry, and putting down comes with the package, but instead of doing it all the time Sasuke, get a goddamn new hobby.
Whatever, he's still a good friend.
I've been wondering…something these people really don't think about is that without me having the fox, they would all be dead. I think that calls for some gratitude. But then again, all the villagers are shit heads who don't really give a fuck.
I might act all happy n stuff all the time, and maybe sometimes, it's real, but a lot of times I laugh and smile to hide what I really feel…and it's enough to fool them all, even hot-shot Sasuke…But there's really only one person who I can't fool…
Myself.
I cry, cry, cry…I'm so pathetic, so very weak. So damn weak… People as weak as me don't deserve the name of Hokage…
And Naruto's name was scribbled so badly that it was pretty much illiterate. Sasuke felt terrible… All the guilt he felt was so uncontainable. He always knew Naruto was hiding some form of pain, but he never knew how much pain it was or how drastic it was.
Sasuke sighed. He never realized the actual reason Naruto acted the way he did, so chatty and loud all the time. It really suited him more than this angsty stuff he was reading. He knew though, that the journal couldn't be full, maybe just a few more entries…
He flipped the page again, looking at the date. It was dated yesterday. Naruto hadn't written in this journal in years, about three… The page was clean and what was written was semi-long…
June 6
It's been three years since the very first entry in here. And know what? The villagers still treat me like shit. But that's alright because I'm not staying here any longer, I'm gonna go insane. So much for Hokage…
I know the people here will be happier anyways.
So, to Tsunade: I always really liked you, old lady, you'll continue to be a great Hokage.
Iruka-sensei: no matter what happens, you were the greatest father figure I ever had. Thank you for everything. You're such a great person.
Kakashi-sensei: You were really cool, I liked you a lot. Thanks for teaching me all I know. You'll live out a great life with Iruka-sensei. Heh heh, don't think I don't know.
Konohamaru: You will be a great Hokage just like the old man was. Do a great job for the both of us.
Ero-sennin: Keep being you're same perverted self. Get another student, try out Sasuke, he's good. Thanks for the Rasengan and everything else.
The other rookie nine: You guys were great, grow up to be great Shinobi, make sure some of you get into the Anbu. Live out your dreams, just cuz mine didn't work out doesn't mean yours won't.
Sakura-chan: Don't give up on Sasuke, he'll come around, if that is, he decides to stop being a stoic bastard heh heh. You'll be a great medical nin. Sorry for annoying you all those years.
There was one more section that was separated from the rest. It had Sasuke's name on it, like Naruto knew Sasuke was going to be the one to find this…
Sasuke,
You really are a bastard. But still, you're the best friend I ever had. All that time we shared, I felt really connected to you, you know my pain and for that, I'm grateful. I'm sorry about your clan…One day you can revive the Uchiha. Just make sure they're not all like you teme. For the very longest time, there has been a lot of things that I've wanted to say to you, guess I could just never bring myself to say them. I was just a little cowardish and I'm sorry. All that time we spent together, it really meant a lot to me. More than you could ever know. More that I would ever say.
Stay put, I know you're gonna try to look for me. Good luck with that heh heh, you won't find any remains, believe me. You're a great guy, get along better with Sakura and smile more dude! Don't look so…temeish all the time.
Make sure you show this to all the people listed. Do it, and DON'T look for my body.
Exiting stage right, Naruto
At first, Sasuke didn't know what to think. All this writing, it didn't really seem like Naruto wrote it. It was deep and filled with sorrow, hate, grudges, and angst. That was not Naruto's style at all. Sasuke finally realized it then. In this last entry, Naruto made his last wishes. Naruto...was going to kill himself.
"WHAT THE HELL NARUTO!" Sasuke shouted angrily. He was planning on suicide?
Without a second thought, Sasuke dashed out Naruto's abandoned apartment and headed for the Hokage's place. He was there within seconds. Burst through the door to the Hokage's office. He slammed Naruto's journal on Tsunade's desk. "I have to go after Naruto! He's going to try suicide!"
Tsunade's eyes widened in shock, "What? What did you say?" she exclaimed outraged.
"This! This last entry is a suicide letter!" Sasuke explained in a rush, jabbing his finger at the entry, "No! I don't have time for this Tsunade, I have to go after him before it's too late!" He didn't even want to hear what Tsunade was going to say. As if he could, he was already out the door, listening to Tsunade shout after him. Something about....if he didn't stop Naruto, then he was going to have to pay the price.
Sasuke had to find Naruto before it was too late. He rushed through the village, receiving countless stares from the villagers he passed. What they hell are you all staring at, you drove my best friend to his death! Naruto was right, the villagers were very selfish and ungrateful, laughing like they were with their family's not having a care in the world. None of them got it, they had no idea what not having a family could do to a person. It was insanity, it was painful. It definitely wasn't something for somebody of a weak heart.
It took a lot of strength and perseverance just to go on without having any family. Sasuke should know, he didn't have anyone left, not even his brother who he wished so much that he wouldn't have killed him. Sasuke knew, that for Naruto, it had to be so much harder. He never had a family his entire life, and the village, who adored his father, Yondaime, hated him. It was terrible, it was sad.
Those years ago, when Naruto was trying to stop Sasuke from leaving, Sasuke said that his pain was worse. It was worse having a family and losing them than never having a family at all. He was wrong. Very wrong. Sitting behind the scenes watching some one else share their love with the ones they cared about must've been hard for Naruto. But he got past it and gained a new family, one Sasuke knew Naruto thought he would never have. Them. It wasn't his real family, sure, but it was the closest thing, and for Naruto, Sasuke thought, that was so much more than he could ever ask for.
Sasuke thought he was one of the only people who cared for Naruto, truly. Other than him, there weren't very many other people that did. He knew what was inside the blonde boy, but Sasuke didn't hold it against him. It wasn't his fault that the villagers were mistaken about the wish Yondaime had made for his son.
He soon passed through the gates, heading into the forest where he caught the surge of Naruto's chakra; he was close by and Sasuke was catching up to him. "Naruto!" he shouted, his voice carrying well through the forest.
Some ways ahead of Sasuke, Naruto heard his name called. He stopped and gritted his teeth, "Damn you Sasuke, didn't I tell you to stay?" Of course he knew Sasuke was going to be the one to find that journal. He left it somewhere only Sasuke would look. Naruto thought ahead, which was unusual, but this was an unusual case. He knew Kakashi was going to order Sasuke to search his place. He knew Kakashi would take Sakura with him. Kakashi wasn't stupid, he knew how much Naruto cared for Sasuke, and if anyone was going to search his small little apartment, it would be him.
He began to run as if his life depended it, or in his case, his death. There was no way Sasuke was gonna catch him before he killed himself. None.
"Naruto!" Sasuke yelled again. He was getting closer to Naruto, he could feel his chakra becoming more vivid.
Sasuke was starting to feel a twinge of a feeling he'd never felt before…he was scared. He was scared of the thought of Naruto disappearing, it would put a gap in his life. It was only just now that Sasuke realized just how much of his life Naruto held, how much of his heart he held. Sasuke didn't want the blonde to die, no- not now. He had to keep living. Otherwise, he would stop living too.
"Naruto, you'd better not die!" he yelled, because if Naruto did die, Sasuke would die right with him. He very well might fallow him in death… "NARUTO!" he yelled even louder. He'd finally caught up to Naruto who was running away from him, "STOP!" he yelled again. As soon as he was close enough, Sasuke grabbed the back of Naruto's collar making him stop in his tracks.
Naruto immediately turned to glare at Sasuke, grabbing his collar in turn, "What the hell? Didn't I fucking tell you to stay in the village?" he yelled. He was so furious that Sasuke ha fallowed him after he'd strictly said not to. Very deeep down inside, though, he was greatful. But that didn't make up for him disobeying.
Sasuke glared at him right back, "Yeah, you did, but I don't think you were sane when you wrote that! So it doesn't count!" he said angrily. Naruto didn't tell him what to do, so even if he would've said it in person, Sasuke still would have fallowed. It was just natural, or at least, that's what he wanted to believe.
Naruto clutched his collar harder, "I believe I was sane enough- don't you see Sasuke, if I go back to the village I'll just be hated more. Those fuckers are probably all laughing and celebrating that I'm gone. I'm a monster, remember?" he said, now yelling at the ground, still having a tight grip on Sasuke's white collar.
Sasuke slammed Naruto on the ground and straddled him, "You're being so goddamned selfish! Didn't you ever think to give a shit about the people who care about you? Huh? The people whow would miss you?" he yelled. Sasuke was so angry and he didn't want Naruto to die. "Iruka, Jiraiya, Tsunade, Kakashi, Sakura! All of them, the whole rookie nine, your student, Konohamaru! Didn't you even give a thought about how they were gonna feel about all of this?" he said, trying to talk sense into the dobe below him. No matter how thick a head the idiot had, something Sasuke said had to get through to him.
Naruto frowned, now being quiet. Who cared if they all cared about him? Most likely- no, he couldn't lie, he had seen good in the eyes of those closest to him. Iruka and the rest, they were all so caring about him. And what would the old man say…what would his dad say? Naruto clenched his eyes shut. They would be ashamed, ashamed that they had once been so proud of the boy who aspired so much to be Hokage. Ashamed that he was giving up his dream just because of a petty little thing like hate.
The raven above him became surprised. His face smoothed out and he was frowning as well. Tears were streaming down Naruto's face. He felt remorse, Sasuke could tell.
"Sasuke…" Naruto mumbled, "Don't you get it? They village, they all hate me…they all see me as a liability, a hazard. And…I don't think I'm being selfish, this is better for every-" Sasuke cut him off.
"No, it's not…" he said closing his eyes in pain. He was trying his best not to cry, he had to be strong in a situation like this. "Naruto, you don't understand, if you disappear, I will too..." he said.
Naruto opened his eyes, "…What?" he said softly in surprise. He looked at Sasuke. Sasuke tried, he really did, but he couldn't help it. Tears were streaming down Sasuke's face, Naruto had never seen Sasuke cry before, this was new to him. And it didn't help with his own crying, it only made him cry harder. "Sasuke…" he said.
Sasuke straitened out his voice, "Naruto, please don't go. If you do…I'll just have to fallow you." he said. He felt like he had no choice, if Naruto was gone, then so was he. "You may not know it, but the village, we all really need you Naruto, you're the one that holds us all together. Without you, we're nothing…I'm nothing…" He climbed off of Naruto sitting next to him.
Naruto sat up. Was Sasuke trying to say what he thought he was?
Sasuke turned to look at Naruto, still having tears coming down his face. He couldn't believe the mood change he'd had, just an hour ago, he was calm and collected. Now was the time for Sasuke to come clean. No turning back. "Naruto…" he said, and then he took a deep breath, "You've always been more to me than just a best friend or rival." he said.
In his head, Naruto nodded. He grabbed Sasuke's hand. "Sasuke, me 'n you are broken aren't we?" he said, looking away.
Sasuke pulled Naruto into an embrace, Naruto placing his head on Sasuke's chest. "Yes Naruto. You and I are broken. But we're broken together." he said. "Naruto…I- I love you." But he felt no body reaction from the blonde he was holding.
"I…love you too Sasuke. And only for you will I go back to the village." Naruto replied softly.
Sasuke smiled warmly.
And when no one else saw, God did. He gave a slight nod of approval to the four people standing in the shadows. "Be proud of your sons." He turned away.
So, how was it? Like it? I hope so~!!
I'm really sorry it was so short, I didn't really know what to put in there. I know the plot was kinda rushed as well.
Such is the mistake of me and my first one-shot. Please review~!!