A/N: Mmkay. My attempt at a Kagome/Kikyo one-shot. Hopefully you'll like it enough to review! Flames because this is Shoujo-Ai will be ignored most graciously and constructive criticism is love.
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or any of it's characters. XD
---
It was hard. So hard to keep up a constant façade. To hide the truth from those that trust and believe in you. Those who view you as innocent, incapable of deceit. But she was deceitful. She was a liar. And she loved it. But she could never understand why she loved something that made her feel so guilty, so shameful. It was wrong. So very wrong for her to feel this way, she knew, but she couldn't stop. She needed it. It made her feel in ways she thought impossible.
What she got in return for her lies and deceit was something she once thought she'd never experience. It was beautiful, amazing. Yet she knew it was also ugly, wrong. She could never tell. She could never even breathe a word of the truth. She was committing a sin, she was committing betrayal, she was damning herself. If they knew the truth…they would never forgive her, never understand. She knew that and wouldn't allow it to happen.
She just couldn't. She loved her friends. She really, really did. But this was something better, so much better. She longed for it when she couldn't have it. Dreamt about it while she slept. And they all watched her. Unsuspecting of the truth. They were fooled by the dreamy looks she had while she gazed at the half dog-demon. Fooled by the way she hmped every time Inuyasha brought her name up. Fooled by the fake hatred and jealousy she showed towards the undead priestess.
And he was the most oblivious of all. Inuyasha. He had no idea. Couldn't detect it under the heavy lavender scent of her body wash, or the overdone perfume. She did it on purpose…the heavy perfume. She knew he didn't like taking the scent in directly. It was overpowering, even for a humans nose. It turned him off from sniffing her, from fully taking in her scent. Because she knew the scent was always on her, even after a long soak and harsh scrubbing.
She felt bad though…for little Shippo. He wouldn't lay with her at night anymore. The heavy perfumes to overpowering for his enhanced senses. Instead he moved on to Sango, snuggling with her at night to keep warm. He distanced himself from her during the day as well, but as much as she missed playing surrogate mother she needed her so much more.
It had started mere months ago. After a brief encounter she just couldn't stop her want, her need, her desire. It was the most overpowering thing she'd ever experienced. And she'd been afraid. Terrified of the things she was thinking, fantasizing. It was unexplained. She just didn't know why. Still doesn't know why. But she didn't have her schoolgirl dreams about Inuyasha anymore. They vanished completely. Her crush gone faster then it had come.
Those innocent dreams of just pecking Inuyasha on the lips with her own were no more. Replaced with erotic, passionate kisses given to her by the woman Inuyasha had once loved. Still loved. But it never stopped with just kisses. It only started with them. Expanding to hot lustful caresses, sensual moans. Always ending with absolute nirvana. Ecstasy that bordered on pain.
The disappointment when she woke to find it all a dream was nearly enough to make her sob. But she never did. Never let her façade slip. She carried on day to day, the only thing getting her by were the fantasies that had manifested in her once innocent mind. But it wasn't enough. She wanted more. She wanted the real thing and in a moment of insanity she'd taken it.
She had a connection with the other priestess. One that let her feel what her other felt, their shared soul connecting them in a way no one else in her time or this time would ever be connected. And she'd found her after slipping away from camp unnoticed. Found her gazing at her reflection in the water of a lake, Shinidamachu floating about her. It had been the most beautiful and most mournful sight she'd ever seen.
And when she had turned, she already had an arrow drawn back. The string pulled taut, her long pale fingers steady and accurate. Her eyes were empty, uncaring. Beautiful brown so void, so vacant. Long, silken strands of black lifting only slightly in the warm summer breeze. She was a goddess made of clay and bone. A goddess who could only survive on the souls of others.
The Shinidamachu glowed silver in the pale moonlight, hovering like streamers in the wind. Dancing and circling around their goddess, delivering to her the essence of others. And she could do nothing but stare in awe. Entranced. Enthralled. Spellbound. She'd whispered her name, and she'd broken free. But she'd been unable to say anything.
Her storm blue eyes locking with the other woman's beautiful brown ones and the bow was dropped. She'd never in all her sixteen years of life experienced something as powerful as the kiss she'd received. It wasn't magical. It was so much more than magical. It was beyond anything she could have ever dreamt and she gladly took it. Gladly begged for more. Gladly screamed her name into the night sky.
That had only been the first of many night she'd spent with her other self. Their shared caresses and kisses were burned into her mind, her skin. She'd never forget. She knew she'd never forget either. And her need always over powered her guilt. Her shame. And she wouldn't let it end. No matter how wrong she knew it was. Because she knew it was right as much as it was wrong.
And she would never let it end. Never.
---
A/N: And…it ends! Definitely not my best piece of work. Probably one of the more faulty pieces I've done. And it's definitely different from the kind of stuff I usually do. But all the while, I hope you like it! I would REALLY like reviews. Constructive criticism earns one a big hug! XD
On a side note. I have yet to go through and correct any mistakes, so if you notice any, let me know? Thank you.