My first story for EXO, woooo!

So I'm really interested in colour psychology, so I was like hey, why don't I write a fic about it?
So that's what I'm doing. I'm writing a Sehun centered chaptered fic revolving around the psychology of colours.. meaning... that each chapter will be taking place at a different time in the past and focusing on one colour.

I hope you enjoy (:

P.S. I apologise if any of my Korean is wrong.. I've started learning it, but if there are any mistakes please let me know. I also put the English translation next to it, so if you don't understand Korean you don't have to keep going back and forth.

~~.~~

The colour blue is the colour of trust and responsibility.

I'm not one hundred percent sure how one describes the rise of a star. Having no firsthand knowledge myself, I have to rely on the second hand moments I was able to latch onto as I watched from the sidelines as a mere spectator.

I hope these counts don't discourage you from reading because it's a story worth telling, and one that I am somewhat eager to share.

In the business of idols you have two choices. Either roll with the changing times or get out. I was never given a choice as I was never an idol.

I met him when the sky was the bluest it would get that year, just before the bitter coldness of winter settled into the bones of the city. I'm not usually one to work in metaphors and beauty, but in the years I spent with him I began to see the world for what it could be if you opened your eyes just a little wider; an orb of colours that have the ability to change in an instant. I learnt that just because the brightness of the colours doesn't hang around for long, it doesn't mean they are meaningless. It just makes you appreciate each one even more.

He taught me that.

In fact he taught me a lot of things, about the world and about myself. But most importantly he taught me how to appreciate and love things for how they were, while they were, because all too soon they would be gone.

I learnt that his colours never stopped changing.

Did you know that there are only a small amount of moments in your life that you can look back on and smile and say, yes, that's the moment that changed my life?

Seems untrue right? Because we make so many choices everyday which change the course we're on, how could we possibly only have a few moments? But I'm not talking about those. I'm taking about the decisions, the big ones that flip your world upside down and make you see everything differently. The ones that at first make you terrified, being faced with the unknown, but eventually warp your way of thinking into positivity and make you so tremendously glad that you did it.

I know what mine was.

The day I met Oh Sehun.

And he was as confident and stable as the colour blue.

I hadn't been in the city long and I had confusing feelings as to what I was actually doing there. I was a foreigner who had a minimal grasp on the language and was more lost than I had ever been in my life.

Why did I think moving to a foreign country was a good idea?

Because I believed that there was more out in the world than what my town offered me. I wanted an adventure. And unknowingly to me at the time, I got it.

It was when the leaves had all but changed from startling oranges and reds to grey and lifeless on the ground that I found myself trudging, not for the first or the second time, down a rain soiled street of Cheongdam-dong back to my apartment that I noticed it. I'd stopped with a huff as I saw my shoelace had untied and caught under my shoe as I bent down to fix it, pulling my coat tighter around me I had to squint against the harsh lights of the building on my right, standing out amongst its surroundings like a Christmas tree that seemed to be reaching for the sky. Curious I'd moved closer, stepping out of the path of the constant stream of pedestrians that passed by eager to get home to their warm inviting beds.

The thought in the back of my mind that I should be doing the same nagged at me, but the building intrigued me more. I watched from the side as a dark car pulled up to the curb, only idling for a minute as three men dressed in dark coats stepped out before it pulled out, joining with the heavy traffic once more.

The men walked towards the building before the shortest of them tapped the tallest one on the arm and they all looked to their right. A group of girls materialised as if out of the shadows, running towards the men with their ponytails flapping in the chilly breeze, flash after flash coming from their phones as they took pictures.

At the time I was curious. I'd heard about how big idols were in South Korea, it was the main reason I was here after all, having attained a scholarship with one of the entertainment companies, but could these men be idols? From where I stood they looked like no more than three friends trying to shield themselves from the cold as they made their way home after a busy day.

I turned away from them, looking back up at the building that had caught my eye in the first place. I marvelled at the way the lights sparkled, almost invitingly, before my eyes were drawn down towards the door as I read the words 'SM Entertainment.'

A smile stretched across my cheeks as I thought that this is the building where I will be spending most of my time in for at least the next two years. It made me feel calm, as warmth settled in my chest that made me sure that I was supposed to be here. And that's when I felt the eyes on me and I turned slowly to confirm that one of the taller men was staring right at me, his face hidden behind a face mask and dark hood. The flash of cameras continued behind him as I heard the frustrated whine of one of the girls reached my ears.

"Can I please get a photo with you now, oppa?"

It sounded like a demanded, but the man never took his eyes off me. Feeling unnerved I pulled my phone out and stared down at the screen, sure that he thought I was some crazy fan come to stalk around the building. I glance back up quickly, and confirmed that he was still staring.

How rude could you get?

I turned on my heel then, walking away from the building that I would come to know better in the daylight of tomorrow and headed towards my apartment, all the while still feeling a stare boring into my back.

In hindsight I shouldn't have been as surprised as I was that my first day didn't go as smoothly as I had planned for it to.

I had of course researched the job and put a decent amount of effort into learning the Korean language, but as I stood just behind my new mentor, who would be training me in management, as they spoke in a rushed voice in their native tongue, I found myself more lost than up to paces for most of the day. I was clicked at in quick succession as I spaced out, no longer even attempting to understand what they were talking about. But the stern face of my new boss soon brought me back to my senses as I managed to stutter out.

"정송함니다." (I'm sorry)

And was quickly waved off with a hand and told to take notes.

I could hear the sound of feet stomping over wood floors as I passed by certain room and was curious to see what was happening behind the closed doors. I follow behind the manager as if on a leash, my notebook and pen ready as I took down everything he told me in a messy English scrawl that I would later have to go over and translate for extra practice.

We stopped abruptly outside of a closed door and I looked up to find my boss staring down at me.

"This is one of the lunch rooms where you can sit on your breaks," I was surprised by his easy to understand English pronunciation. "I'll ask you to eat something now and then head down for coffees and meet me outside door nineteen in twenty minutes."

He thrusted a piece of paper towards me that had me fumbling with my notepad before I grabbed it from him, staring at the writing in confusion. I looked up again to ask him to confirm with me, but he'd already turned and begun walking down the corridor telling me once again that I had twenty minutes.

I pushed the door open, walking into a modern room which was equipped with a full kitchen and large benchtop and a white couch pushed against the wall, with a low sleek black table placed between them. I sat on the couch pulling the sandwich I had packed this morning out of my bag and begun to eat it, my hungry stomach grumbling as it was finally satisfied.

I leaned back against the cushions, finally giving my sore feet a well needed rest. I thought about the size of the building and how I had seen no more than five other people the whole morning including my mentor and his boss. Then my mind turned to the men that I saw last night, remembering the one who stared after me that if I'm being honest I've been keeping an eye out for the whole morning. Not that I'd be able to tell what he actually looked like without the face mask and the shadows ghosting over his face, but I had the absurd feeling that I would just know it when I saw him. That would be it.

I opened my phone, contemplated messaging my best friend to tell them about my first day, but the time standing out at the top of the screen caused panic to rise in me. I'd forgotten about getting the coffees and there was no doubt in me that I was going to be late getting back. I picked up the paper my boss had given me and stared at the hangul scrawled on it. It took me a few minutes to decipher the words and another five minutes to make it out of the building and find the coffee shop on the corner. I stood impatiently in line, my foot tapping restlessly against the ground as worry nagged at the forefront of my mind.

How much trouble am I going to be in?

Finally the coffees were in my arms and I sped walked back to the building, riding the elevator anxiously as the floor numbers changed almost teasingly slow. I made it to what I was about seventy percent sure was the correct floor and stepped off, striding down the hall as I searched for room nineteen. It turned out to be at the end of the corridor and I stopped, looking around for my boss who should have been waiting for me outside. I shifted the large amount of drinks supported in plastic bags to one hand and grabbed my phone out of my back pocket. I sighed, as the time told me I was ten minutes later than I should have been.

I huffed in annoyance at my own time management and knocked firmly on the door in front of me, figuring that my boss has already gone inside.

There was no reply.

I knocked again louder this time, but the nose coming from the room only served to drown my presence out. Without prior thought of the consequences of barging into a room unannounced I turned the door handle and stepped inside tripping over my own feet slightly and righting myself just in time to meet the curious gazes of a group of men sitting on chairs towards the back of the room where my boss was standing staring daggers at me.

I mumbled an apology and closed the door behind me, walking over to the group as confidently as I could and placed the coffees on the table in front of them. I felt unnerved as not one of the sets of eyes watching me looked away for even a second. I looked over at my boss hoping that he would give me some sort of indication as to what I do now, but his face was like a statue as he watched me just as curiously.

I sighed, straightening my shoulders and glanced at the men in front of me. I counted them quietly in my head, my final number coming to twelve. So this must be the group I would be looking after while I'm here. The freshly debuted EXO, twelve member South Korean/Chinese idol group.

Great.

I drew in a deep breathe, eager to fix their first impressions of me, something that is not an easy feat.

"안녕하세요. 저는 Y/N-임니다. 만나서 반갑습니다" (Hello. I'm Y/N. Nice to meet you)

Nobody made a sound.

My biggest worry about myself back then was that when I got nervous I rambled, saying anything to cover the awkward atmosphere. Unfortunately this is a lot easier done in English, when everyone can understand English.

I moved to the table that held the coffees and begun pulling them out of the bags, having no idea what each man's name was, and what coffee they ordered, but that wasn't stopping me.

"Anyway, so I went down and got you guys all coffees and if you could help me figure out who's is whose, that would be a big help to me. And I'm so excited to get to work with you all and get to know you better."

Nothing but silence, until one of them speaks up, a smaller looking one with a soft face.

"그녀는 뭐라고 말했습니까?"(What did she say?)

I looked up at him, worry on my face as I realised that most of them probably can't understand what I was saying. That was confirmed when the man beside him shrugged.

This was going to be harder than I originally thought. I took another minute, pushing the thoughts of everyone staring at me out of my mind and bring everything I've learnt so far about the language to the forefront of my mind. I take a deep breath and speak in what I hope was an easy to understand tone, hoping that my pronunciation was right.

"Uh, the white iced coffee?"

The one with the small smile jumped up and began to make his way over to me, bowing slightly he took the coffee from my hand.

"Thank you, I'm Chen."

I nodded my head slightly in acknowledgment and turned back to the coffees.

I handed out almost all of them before there are three left on the table. I picked up the café latte and looked around.

"That's Suho's," My boss spoke up for the first time since I entered the room, gesturing to one of the many with short, dark brown hair.

I walked over in the direction he pointed, heading towards two of them that have yet to get there coffee. Both have brown hair. Both are looking at me expectantly. I have to make my decision, if no one here is going to help me.

"That's Sehun, not Suho!" My boss practically yelled as I tried to hand the drink to the taller one, who watched me curiously, but did not speak up about my mistake.

I turned and handed the drink to the correct guy, who took it from me with a small smile.

"Well they all look the same," I mumble in English under my breath, turning back to the other drinks.

My boss almost choked as he shot me a dirty look. I heard laughter coming from one of the boys and turned to see that it was Suho, who obviously understood my English. I just shrugged and gave him a small smile.

They broke away into smaller groups after that and I was left standing off to the side with my boss, who's scowl looked permanently placed on his face. I glanced at him, watching his eyes scan over the others as they talked and laughed amongst themselves. I followed his gaze and my eyes immediately locked onto one of the men who was staring uncaringly at me. I shuffled on my feet slightly, not expecting the attention when my boss clears his throat, forcing me to look away.

"We don't have anything planned for the rest of the day, so why don't you take it off. We'll see you back here at eight tomorrow."

I nodded quickly, eager to get out of the room that had my nerves on high alert since I walked in. I picked up my bag and headed for the door, before turning back around remembering my manners. I was going to be spending a lot of time with them after all. With a bow I spoke quickly.

" 안녕히 계세요." (Goodbye)

I shut the door firmly behind me and had every intention of heading straight for the elevator and out the front doors, still not one hundred percent sure if I would be returning tomorrow morning or not. But as I walked down the long corridor I passed a room with large windows that looked out over the city. I couldn't resist stepping inside.

The room was empty, only occupied by a long white sofa and sleek black coffee table, the same as in the lunch room. I walked to the windows, placing my bag on the table as I passed by and stared in awe at the site in front of me. The city seemed to stretch on forever as the shades of grey stood out against the reds and left over greens of the plantations around it. The sky was so blue that I had to shield my eyes even through the glass to keep from squinting. It truly was beautiful.

There was nothing like this at home.

I was so entrapped in the cityscape that I didn't hear the door opening behind me, until a soft voice sounded to my left.

"Are you…okay?" The unsteady voice asked in shaky English.

I would have smiled at the attempt if the sudden appearance of the man didn't have me jumping back in surprise. He looked worried as I stared at him with wide eyes, my mind tying to comprehend if he intentionally snuck up on me, or if I really was just too caught up in my surroundings.

He looked uncomfortable with my silence and gestured a hand to himself. "I'm Sehun."

"I'm Y/N," I replied, stretching out my hand for him to take.

He did immediately; his large hand almost completely covered mine as he shook it twice before letting go.

"Did you follow me out here?" I asked, not accusingly, but out of mere curiosity. Hoping that he understood my horrible Korean.

He'd shrugged as if it wasn't a big deal, he seemed to understand. "You seemed flustered; I wanted to make sure you were okay."

I couldn't help the smile that made its way onto my face. Being in close proximity with him was like nothing I had ever felt before. It was as if just the act of being near him was serving as a kind of support that held me up and made me confident. It was an interesting quality and not one that I would take for granted.

"I'm okay," I answered, my voice soft.

He smiles, as if he needed to hear me say it for himself. "You're coming back tomorrow?"

I stared at him, wondering why it was so important to him that I was even here at all. I wondered what it actually meant to him, if he thought I was just a pretty face for him to look at, or if he just wanted someone to tease. But I don't think that's the kind of person he is. I couldn't help but feel at ease as I looked up at him. I couldn't help but feel that if he was waiting for me somewhere I would have every reason to return.

"I'll come back tomorrow."

His smile split into a grin then, which had me grinning too.

I couldn't help but think that I could do this.

If Sehun was here with me; I could do anything.