How We Are Hungry (a sequel to, "I'll Teach You And You'll Never Be Sure").
Title: How We Are Hungry
Rating: M for mature audiences.
Pairing(s): Bonnie/Stefan
Summary: Bonnie remembers. (a/n: It will make sense to read "I'll Teach You And You'll Never Be Sure" first).
Disclaimer: All of the Vampire Dairies characters in this story belong to that of L J Smith, and CW Network.
While cleaning up, Bonnie finds a necklace under the bed. Bonnie has no idea how the hell it got there; it reeked of vervain, it looked ancient but elegant, and most importantly, Bonnie has no idea how the hell it got in her bedroom. It was not something from her grandmother.
Bonnie put it away, out of sight because she doesn't want to think about anything right now.
Bonnie doesn't remember until Caroline opens up her mouth and asks, "Remember when you went away to California, like two years ago?," and Bonnie wants to say, yes, she did remember. However, she didn't. There were bits and pieces: her aunt, the freedom, the blue California skies, but there is the nagging feeling that she should remember something important.
It happens again at school in History class. Stefan keeps looking at her, which in itself is not all that strange, except he keeps looking at her like he is sad and sorry and Bonnie doesn't feel like it has anything to do with her grandmother.
Bonnie has a dream: her mouth is pressed against Stefan's and it feels so familiar. His hands run all over the surface of her body and that too, is familiar. Then there is a sharp pain in her neck, and Bonnie wakes up in a sweat.
She's at Mystic Grill. Damon tears himself away from Elena long enough to wink at Bonnie like he knows a secret. Bonnie has promised herself that when the time came, she'd do what needs to be done with regards to Damon. She also promised that she'd do the same if Stefan were to try and stop her. She's not so sure about the latter anymore.
There is some type of crisis with Elena and her family, as it always seems to be, and Damon is around, and Stefan is around, and Bonnie is around because who else is going to save Elena.
Stefan keeps giving Bonnie that damned look again, and she just wants it to stop. So, Bonnie pulls out the necklace, the one from under her bed. Damon takes one look at it and then looks at his little brother as if to say, 'how could you be so stupid?' Elena is confused because no one is saying anything. And Stefan stares at the necklace in Bonnie's hand with a mixture of shame and relief: It's just one more thing he has to confess to Elena; one more thing he hopes Elena forgives.
Later one, when the crisis is over and Elena is safely tucked inside her world, Stefan goes to Bonnie and tells her that he will tell Elena everything. Bonnie doesn't know what that means but that doesn't stop him from going on like there is a battery in his mouth, "It's okay, I'll tell her what happened. I'm so sorry I did this to you." Bonnie wonders what the hell Stefan did to her.
Damon stops Stefan from being an idiot and confessing all to Elena. Sure, Damon wants the girl to himself, but not by fault of Stefan's stupidity. Besides, Stefan is bound to reveal Damon's part in the whole sorted summer. Stefan wasn't the only one who had some fun with the little Witch.
Bonnie's on a date with a handsome boy, in a car that is parked and the backseat is too cluttered, so, they make–out in the front seat. The steering wheel is pressed against Bonnie's back and in an instant she remembers a scene similar to this one: Stefan's left hand was buried in her hair, and his right hand was trying desperately to shield her lower back from the wheel, and his mouth was wet and open against hers, and his cock was hot and hard inside of her, and rocking and rocking and rocking, until she saw stars.
Bonnie starts, and jumps off of the handsome youth in front of her. Suddenly, Bonnie wants to go home because she is cold.
It goes on like this for a while: some miniscule thing will jar Bonnie's memory. It's all Stefan, all the time. Damon happens, too, and that disturbs her to no end. Stefan can't seem to control himself in her memories. Damon doesn't need to control himself, it seems.
They are at Mystic Grill, again, and Elena is sitting comfortably between the brothers. Bonnie wants to set fire to Stefan, she wants to punish him for being a monster. But what did she expect? Aren't vampires monsters anyway?
Nothing lasts forever. Bonnie buries this violation like she buries everything else. If Bonnie's not the greatest friend to Elena anymore, there is no worry because Elena stopped being a good friend a long time ago. If Bonnie flinches every time Stefan seems to reach for her, its okay because Stefan's touch should not feel good, she should be disgusted.
And, if Stefan were to apologize one more time, Bonnie would not be responsible for what she does next.