She Saw Me
Harunomiya
Disclaimer: I don't own Kim Harrison's characters.
Chapter 1: Overture
What in the ever-after am I doing here? I thought frantically.
He's kissing me...
This was wrong. He was all wrong. It was all so wrong.
I drew back, breaking contact as my hands pushed him away.
He recognized the expression on the my face, the one that gave me away. You know, the one when I was thinking of doing something stupid. "Whatever it is you're thinking right now, stop."
"I know. I can't." My voice sounded hoarse, hallow.
He reached for me, worry and hurt etched across his rugged features, my eyes gave me away. I shied away, suddenly revolted at the thought of him touching me again. I pushed him away and lurched for the car door. I needed to get out, get away. As far as possible. I got out of the car, leaving the door open with him calling after me.
"Rachel, come back!" his voice echoed my confusion, as he only managed to drive me further away.
Briefly I closed my eyes and in my mind, her face flashed, her dark eyes piercing. I felt discombobulated.
She was in me, in my blood, invading every cell in my body. She was the one I wanted. She was the one I saw, felt, desired.
"No," I said softly, knowing he couldn't hear me. It was really raining now. I kept walking, hearing him call my name but knowing I couldn't go back to him, that he wasn't what I'd wanted him to be. Maybe he never had been.
As I got further down the path I couldn't hear him anymore, just the rain and thunder. I cut across a small creek on the plank across it and saw the first flash of lightning shinning suddenly above and then disappearing. It was followed by a crack of thunder that seemed to come from right behind me pushing me, forward. The path was different than I remembered it, twisting around the trees and rocks I didn't recognized, but it had been a long time. Everything looks different when you're older, not staring up at the world but down upon it. Another clap of thunder boomed over me. I was sure the path came out somewhere.
I couldn't see houses or lights, just trees followed by more trees, stretching into the distance. Damn it to the Turn! Suddenly I wasn't even sure if I was still on the path at all, and that made me panic and start to run, brushing branches out of my face as the rain pelted my back and dripped into my eyes, slippery and cold. The sky was black above me now as I started to think about tornadoes, the world swirling around and me with nothing to hold on to but trees, and this pushed me to run faster, the sound of my breathing hoarse in my ears. The summer storm reflected my state of mind or rather the flux of my emotions. I couldn't see the path anymore in the rain and the dark, and everything was slippery beneath me as I ran harder, towards what had to be the clearing ahead. I thought of the houses on the street with their warm lights and the even green lawns and all the landmarks, so familiar that I could find them in my sleep. I ran to that clearing, sure that I could see it all in front of me. Until I reached the last set of branches and pulled them aside to reveal more branches, and leaves dripping with rain, and pushed through with all my strength to burst out into open space, my heart racing in my chest, and kept running until I hit something, hard something that moved and jumped back, its own breath hitting my face.
It was Ivy.
It was if my inner turmoil had called her to me.
She was sopping wet, her dark hair sticking to her forehead, in a white T-shirt with a red tank top showing through beneath the leather jacket and black leather pants, a pair of headphones hung around her neck, attached to a iPod clipped at her waist.
What in the Turn was she doing out in the rain? Clearly she was not dressed in the proper rain wear. But then again neither was I. God, I hope I don't get sick frolicking in the rain. It would serve me right for my stupidity.
She was breathing hard, her face flushed and beaded with raindrops, and she was the first person I'd met in a long, long time who stood taller than me and looked down into my eyes. The thunder boomed around us, with another flash of white light, and Ivy and I, breathing hard, stood still in that clearing, close enough that I could see the goose bumps on her flesh. She stared at me with her big sad brown eyes as I stared right back, unflinching even when she raised her hand to my face and tentatively brushed her fingers across my cheek as she wasn't sure I was real.
Her touch sent shivers down my spine and a warmth spread where her slender fingers grazed against my skin, featherlight. I savored the contact, her touch radiated the only warmth in the cold around us, in me.
It seemed like we stood there together forever, Ivy and I, like two strangers in a clearing with the rain pounding down, inexplicably brought together in a summer storm. I wanted to talk to her, wanted words to come so I could say something that would make this all real. Something about what we had in common, shared: Vampiric Charms, our lives in constant danger, a Revelation about a belief once considered sacred. But she only stared at me, her face wistful, a smile creeping across if as she knew me, had lost me along the way and only found me again, here. I think she knew it too in that moment. She knew me.
I could almost read her thoughts. It was times like this that her guard was down. Rachel. God, do you have any idea how much I love you? What you do to me?
Memories played in my head of the day Ivy had asked or tried to force me to be her scion.
Then I heard Ceri's voice.
"Rachel!" and then again, "Rachel! Are you there?"
"I'm here," I said softly to Ivy, and she pulled back from me, dropping her hand. I felt the loss of the contact keenly. I could see in her dark eyes a glimmer of hope, painful to see, because I realized what an ass I've been to her. Ivy who offered everything to me. The beautiful and powerful last living heir to the Tamwood line, scion to Piscary. She could have anyone she desired, but from the look from her eyes said she desired only me. But for all her power, I had the power to crush her with a single word, if I so chose to do so. Power over her that she willingly handed over. It was heady stuff that.
But one word, one look, one gesture from me could crush her. Some days I hated the power that I held over her. It made me responsible, as Kisten had often reminded me, and Ivy was a lot to be responsible for.
I caught sight of a raindrop that clung to her thick dark lashes, until it grew too heavy to be contained any longer. I was mesmerized by that particular raindrop as it freed itself from those lashes, that marked its passing down that sculpted cheek, from one place to another. It gathered finally in the fullness of Ivy's lips, that dew, the source of life.
I was standing in the middle of a storm, rain pouring down, yet my throat felt dry and parched. But water was the furthest thing on my mind. It wasn't enough.
All I had to do is step forward, and drink my full of that dew, long and deep until my thirst was quenched and sated. But once I dare take that first drink, I knew with utter certainty that I would thirst for more. Crave it.
These unusual thoughts were singular enough to give me a moments pause, the intensity of them, was startling. Who was the Vamp now? Was that how it felt for her? This constant need, incessant craving that was like a living thing, enough to driven to distraction. Her willpower was staggering backed by discipline. I could not hide myself from the truth, there was no vampire whammy behind this. I will not bring myself to trivialize this moment.
The need to reach out to her was overwhelming, to touch her. I found myself leaning forward, towards her, all else forgotten. Ceri's voice broke the moment, bringing me back to myself with a start. What would have I done if Ceri weren't looking for me, there to stop what might happen? I don't know. Standing before her, in the rain, utterly wet and cold to the bone, I came to an epiphany. I'm tired of the push and pull between us. What I want... what I want will change everything for better or worse, I don't know. So much was left to the unknown. I accepted what I was feeling for Ivy, what I had felt for her for some time and hadn't wanted to acknowledge. I was a damn good runner, it was time to stop running from the truth.
Ivy's smile warmed, spilling the raindrop down her chin, rapidly speeding down her throat, disappearing in to the folds of the plastered T-shirt, that clung to her chest like a second layer of skin. My gaze lingering at the sight of the rapid rise and fall of her chest, brought a furious blush to my wet cheeks. She must have read something in my face, or picked up with her vampire senses. Flustered, I turned to look for Ceri, who was still calling through the rain and the trees. "I'm here," I said again.
Ceri was bursting through the brush now. She was bare-legged wearing a shinny yellow raincoat, pulled tight. The trees were bending overhead, wind whistling through as the rain blow across me. I turned back around; Ivy was already running down the path I'd came, a blur of black leather.
She's going to have a devil of a time getting out of those leather pants.
She was giving me space, this I knew. I will have to deal with everything when I returned home, without further intrusions. If only Ceri hadn't shown up...
Pull yourself together. You'll feel better when you get home, I thought, beginning to shiver as my bodily needs caught up with me.
Home? Home is where Ivy Tamwood is. She's probably already had a pot of coffee ready for me when I get there.
A smile curbed on my lips, warmed with the thought. Why did she love me? Before I could ponder this mystifying thought, Ceri interrupts yet again. My smile disappears as my brows contract in a scowl, marking my displeasure.
If she wasn't a good friend, I swear...
"Rachel?" Ceri was closer now and I turned to the sound of her voice. Her raincoat was dripping wet, shining and bright among all the green. I could see the headlights of her car now beaming into the clearing. "Are you okay?"
Pushing back my displeasure I answered her. "I'm fine," I said. "I got lost on this path."
"We were so worried," she said coming to stand in front of me and wiping her hair out of her eyes.
I opened my mouth to say something reassuring to her when instead, a fit of uncontrollable sneezing hit. Crap!
"You've caught a cold!" Ceri said, stating the obvious.
Lucky me...
Author's Notes:
End of Chapter 1: Overture.
This is my first attempt at trying to write a fan fiction for the Rachel Morgan books. I love Kim Harrison's writing style and cast of characters, most notably the Rachel/Ivy angst. It has endless possibilities. I hope that I didn't disgrace myself too badly.
More Fanfics needed! Rally to the clariton call Rachel Morgan Fans!
Ahem... where was I? Ah, yes, thank you for reading! All reviews are welcomed. Comments and critiques, thoughts, ideas, excetra, excetra.
P.S. I revised the story and made due adjustments and corrections. Such errors made because of my haste. Thank you for pointing them out.
-Harunomiya