A/N: Will anyone read this, let's find out! Hi kiddies. Is it wrong to want to be known as 'that bitch who write niff fics but never fuckin updates anything' because I think i'm well on my way.
Basically, the point of this, if you didn't get it already because I'm pretty bad with words (good for a writer), Jeff Sterling is a superstar who moves to LA (after touring for a while or some shit idk) and he's settling in LA so he's going to a new school, enter Dalton Academy! which is in LA for whatever reason! Yay! Jeff moves in next door to Nick Duval, runner-up of the Warblers, and longtime best friend of Sebastian Smythe. What Nick and Sebastian don't know, is that Jeff doubles as superstar RikeЯ, whom they're both completely obsessed with, because, let's face it, he's the coolest guy on the planet. It's based on Hannah Montana, btdubs, cuz that show was some good tv. I'll shut up now, READ ON!
Best of Both Worlds
Episode One
Jeffery Sterling was starting at a new school on Monday morning. He was a little nervous about it. Not many 15 year old superstars get to go to a normal high school. But more importantly, he was worried about not having friends – and especially if anyone at school found out he was actually a superstar. He didn't think he'd be recognized – he usually looked much different onstage with his guitar than he did on the street.
Jeff finished washing the black, blue, and pink hair dye out of his bangs and flipped his hair back to the other side.
"Jeff, honey, come downstairs! The neighbors are here!" Jeff's mother called.
"Just a sec, Mom!" Jeff replied. Quickly, Jeff surveyed his outfit, face, and hair, to make sure all traces of superstar were gone. He took off his favorite custom-made guitar pick necklace and put it in the drawer under the sink. "Perfect." Straightening his glasses, Jeff trotted downstairs to meet the neighbors. His mother had gotten impatient and taken the adult neighbors into the backyard. Mr. Neighbor was going to grill something. Mrs. Neighbor and Jeff's mother were talking loudly to this effect on the patio.
However, the neighbors' son was standing in the living room, awkwardly scuffing his feet on the carpet.
"Hey," Jeff said as he jumped off the end of the stairs. The other kid looked up.
"Hey," he said. "I'm Nick Duval, I live next door."
"Nice to meet you," Jeff said. "I'm Jeff. Jeff Sterling."
"Cool," Nick said.
"It will probably take them a while to get lunch cooked. Did you want to play a video game or something?" Jeff asked. "Or, actually, I have monopoly…"
"Sure, monopoly is fun," Nick said. "Don't tell anyone, but the only video game I'm good at is Guitar Hero."
"Haha, me too!" Jeff agreed without thinking. "Well… yeah, I'm still pretty bad."
"Me too!" Nick said, giggling. Jeff took the monopoly box from under the stairs to the kitchen table.
Soon Nick and Jeff felt as if they'd been friends for years, laughing at each other's' modified game rules (Jeff never played with hotels, Nick liked to make up fun ways to get extra money).
"What kind of music do you like?" Nick asked.
"Oh, uh… everything," Jeff said. "Some pop, rock, Fall Out Boy, 80s, 20s jazz, musicals… basically everything good."
"Yeah, me too," Nick said. "We get a lot of good bands coming through here, of course, what do you expect, LA, right? But the best talent by far, and I am in no way being modest about this, is the Warblers."
"What's the Warblers?" Jeff asked.
"The show choir at school," Nick said. "Do you sing?"
"Uh… not usually," Jeff lied.
"Oh, my Gosh, but you can dance right? You look like a dancer," Nick said. "All my friends are in the Warblers. My best friend and I actually are sort-of like the co-vice presidents!"
"Co-vice presidents?" Jeff asked.
"Well, we're only sophomores," Nick said. "Next year when Wes graduates, we'll be in charge."
"What's the school like?" Jeff asked. "Is it hard? Are people nice?"
"It's like a big party!" Nick exclaimed. "Everybody's always singing and dancing."
"Oh."
"Don't you like singing and dancing?" Nick asked, almost appalled that anyone could not.
"Course I do," Jeff said with a smile.
"And everyone is really nice," Nick said. "Well, except Sebastian, but I'll make him be nice to you."
Jeff's nerves were a little calmer as Jeff's mom dropped him and Nick off at school Monday morning. At least he had one friend. Nick pulled Jeff into the dining hall, where a lot of students, maybe the entire student body, was eating breakfast.
"Sebastian!" Nick called, hurrying over to him. "Sebastian, meet my neighbor, Jeff Sterling. Jeffers, my best friend, Sebastian Smythe."
"Nice to meet you," Jeff said awkwardly.
"The pleasure's all mine – or it will be, I hope," Sebastian said, eyeing Jeff up and down. "Not that you won't have the pleasure too, of course."
"How you use lines like that and still get laid, I'll never know," Nick said, sitting down and stealing some of Sebastian's home fries. Jeff sat down awkwardly as well. "Hey, Blaine!" Nick shouted across the room, motioning him over. "Jeff, our soloist, Blaine Anderson. Blaine, my neighbor, Jeffery Sterling. And also, tell Sebastian to stop hitting on all the new recruits, or we won't have any new members."
"You're joining the Warblers?" Blaine asked Jeff.
"I don't know if I should," Jeff said. "I sort of have a lot on my plate, with the move and everything. And I'm probably not that good."
"Don't sweat it, new kid, you'll fit right in," Blaine said.
"Thanks…" Jeff said off-handedly. Really, he was afraid if they got him singing, they'd recognize him. Speaking of.
"Gentlemen, my brother says he can score us tickets to the RikeЯ concert this Friday night!" Blaine said.
"Really?" Sebastian said, totally excited, then– "I mean, that'd be cool, if I had, like, an 8-year-old sister."
"Bastian, we already know you're obsessed with him," Nick said.
"God, can you blame me? Have you see that boy's ass? Or, like, his perfectly flawless face? And his hips? Tell me you've never thought about licking his fucking abs. Even his smile! It makes Nick weak at the knees," Sebastian said in his own defense.
"I told you that in confidence!" Nick protested.
"no, you didn't, you practically moaned it while we watched his last interview," Sebastian said. "But how is Cooper getting tickets? It's sold out."
"Who knows? It's Cooper," Blaine said. "He's probably sleeping with the ticket agent. I just tell him how many I want, and he'll get them. Us three, Jeff, you wanna come?" Jeff looked up from his lap.
"Come where?"
"RikeЯ, in concert, this Friday!" Nick said. "He's so gorgeous."
"Oh… um, no thanks," Jeff said.
"What?!" Sebastian practically shrieked. "You don't like RikeЯ? How can you not like RikeЯ?"
"No, uh, I like him fine," Jeff said quickly. "I just have plans Friday night. I told my mom I'd help her unpack and stuff."
"Aww," Nick said. "You're gonna miss an awesome show! Everyone keeps saying how seeing him live is nothing like listening to his album. He's so alksadiasdlkjdk!"
"Maybe next time," Jeff said.
Except not next time. It would be pretty impossible for Jeff to go to his own show, since RikeЯ was Jeff's alter ego superstar persona.
Three days later, Jeff had reluctantly joined the Warblers. They were all at lunch on Thursday, excited about the concert.
"Cooper could only get me three tickets," Blaine was saying to Nick and Sebastian. "I can't wait to see him. I heard he was doing autographs at his dressing room."
"I just want him to sing Cali Girls," Nick said. "I always imagine he's singing Cali Boys." Nick sighed dramatically and fell into Jeff's shoulder laughing.
"Yeah, right," Sebastian said. "You'll have less luck getting RikeЯ than I do of seducing Jeff."
"What do you think, Jeffy?" Nick asked.
"About what?" Jeff asked.
"RikeЯ. Gay or straight?" Nick pressed.
"Oh… um… I don't know," Jeff said. "Never thought about it. He looks straight, I guess. Sings songs about girls."
"Really?" Sebastian sighed, absolutely heartbroken. "You think so? I mean…"
"Bastian. You're obsessed with him, we already know," Nick said.
"I'm like in love with him!" Sebastian bemoaned. Jeff nervously readjusted his glasses on his face.
"You think RikeЯ's hot, though, right?" Blaine asked Jeff.
"He's not my type, I guess," Jeff said.
"Okay, that's it, I give up, I can't tell," Blaine sighed.
"Thank God, me neither," Nick said.
"What?"
"Dicks or chicks?" Sebastian asked.
"Um…" Jeff said.
"Are you gay, straight, bi, pan, ace, something else, or completely undecided?" Nick asked.
"I – I like boys, same as you three," Jeff said. "Sorry, I would have thought that was obvious." Sebastian grinned while the other two dug for their wallets.
"So, after school, I have to help my mom do something stupid, then I thought I could come over and we could play Guitar Hero," Nick said. "Sebastian has Lacrosse, Blaine has boxing, so just the two of us?"
"Oh, sure," Jeff said with a genuine smile. "Just text me before you come over. My mom and I might be doing something stupid." Jeff had a RikeЯ wardrobe fitting after school. "Four-thirty?"
"Sounds good," Nick agreed.
At 4:25, Jeff's phone got a text message.
"Nick alert, two minutes," Jeff announced. Jeff's mom kindly thanked the wardrobe gentleman and showed him to the door. Jeff raced upstairs to wash the hair dye out before Nick got there, scrambling to take out his contacts, and get rid of his necklace and bracelets all at once. As Jeff ran back downstairs, straightening his glasses on his face and flipping his bangs into position, the porch door opened and in walked Nick, holding his skateboard.
"Ready?" Nick grinned.
"Oh yeah! C'mon upstairs. The stuff's in my room," Jeff said. He'd made a conscious effort to Nickproof his room earlier that afternoon. "I've got, uh, Warriors of Rock, that's my favorite, also Smash Hits… Band Hero, and Rock Band 2. The rest are around somewhere, just haven't unpacked them yet."
"Awesome," Nick grinned. "I like Warriors of Rock too." Jeff made a point of letting Nick play guitar (as opposed to bass), and of doing badly on purpose. He thought he was probably taking too many precautions, but he didn't like the idea of the guys finding out he was actually RikeЯ, especially given how obsessed they all were.
"Can I use your bathroom?" Nick asked about an hour later.
"Umm…" Jeff said, trying to remember if he'd put his jewelry and hair dye away. "Yeah, sure."
"I won't tell your mom about any porn I see, I promise," Nick laughed as he left in the direction of the bathroom. All was fine for a minute or two, then… "Iiiiiii knew ittt," Nick sang, skipping out of the bathroom gleefully.
"Knew what?" Jeff asked.
"You're a closet RikeЯ fan!" Nick exclaimed. "It's okay, you don't have to be afraid of your feelings. You can come out of the RikeЯ closet. But more importantly than that, where did you get the necklace?"
"Um… it's… you can buy them on his website. Ten bucks," Jeff said. "The chain is pretty cheap, though, I'd get a better one if I were you."
"Aww, you put a J on the back of it," Nick said, peering at a tiny doodled J on the back of the necklace.
"Wouldn't want to lose it," Jeff shrugged.
"Are you sure you don't want to go tomorrow night?" Nick asked. "You can have my ticket. I'll see him next time."
"I really can't," Jeff said. "Maybe next time. You and Blaine and Sebastian will have a great time, he really does put on a pretty good show."
"What's your favorite song, though?" Nick asked.
"Cali Girls, of course," Jeff laughed.
"I'll video it for you," Nick promised.
"Nah, just enjoy the show," Jeff said.
"No, come on, you're my friend," Nick said.
"Really?" Jeff asked.
"Best friend," Nick avowed. It was in that second that Jeff almost confessed the whole thing, but just as the words were about to tumble out of his mouth, Jeff stopped. Now wasn't the time.
As promised, Friday night's show was awesome. From onstage, Jeff easily picked out the Warblers, often singing or pointing in their direction. Sebastian swooned more than once and actually yelled out, "RikeЯ, I love you!" during a gap in the music.
"Thanks!" Jeff replied brightly. "I love all of you! Thank you so much for coming tonight. I've got one last song for you." He plucked some chords on his guitar. Out of the corner of his eye, Jeff saw Nick losing his shit and falling into Sebastian.
I like them Cali Girls, valley girls
Like the way they move
Love the things they do
Keep me up at night
"Thank you, Los Angeles! I'll be signing a few autographs at my dressing room. Good Night!" Jeff left the stage, dropping his guitar off with some sound guys before heading upstairs.
Jeff toweled most of the sweat from his hair. As usual, the washable hair dye had bled onto the towel. He sighed – he really had to get a better brand, although this was convenient for quick changes. Jeff quickly dabbed the black, blue, and pink streaks back into his bangs. Finally, he opened his dressing room door. He signed a few pictures of his face for some little girls. Then he was actually more surprised than he should have been when the next person in line was Blaine.
"Hi," Blaine said.
"Hey there," Jeff replied.
"Could you make it out to Sebastian?" Blaine asked. "Sebastian's my friend and he'd kill me if I didn't get an autograph for him. And can you do another one for my little brother, Blaine? He loves you. Not that I don't love you…"
"Sure thing," Jeff laughed, making out the two autographs.
"Thank you, RikeЯ, you're the best," Blaine yelled as security cut off the autographs and ushered Jeff back into his dressing room. And then promptly left Jeff alone. Jeff decided to take a shower because ew.
Unbeknownst to him, the dressing room window pushed open and there was Nick Duval's head.
"Higher!" Nick said.
"You're already standing on my head!" Sebastian snarked. "And you're not exactly light."
"Jump!" Nick suggested. Sebastian jumped and Nick heaved himself in the window. Holy lax security, Batman. Brushing himself off from his fall, Nick looked around the dressing room. "RikeЯ's hot dogs!" On another table… "RikeЯ's tie!" The tie in question was turquoise and white plaid. The bathroom door opened and out walked– "RikeЯ!" Jeff immediately turned his back, readjusting his bathrobe.
"Whoever you are, you better get out of here right now, or I'm gonna call security!" Jeff said.
"No, wait, my name's Nick Duval, and I'm a huge fan!" Nick exclaimed. Jeff cringed, it would be Nick, wouldn't it? He looked around for anything he could hide with. He'd only known Nick a week, but they'd hung out almost every second of every day, and he knew Nick would recognize him. Jeff's hair was in a towel, but… Jeff took a deep breath and smashed his face into a cream pie. "Did you just shove pie in your face?"
"It's a foaming facial wash… pie," Jeff said, dropping his voice an octave or two.
"What happened to your voice?" Nick asked.
"This happens after every show," Jeff said, hiding behind a rack of button up shirts and faded, ripped, and studded jeans.
"You give so much!" Nick exclaimed, parting the clothes down the center and stepping through the rack. Jeff turned his back and walked around the rack. Nick followed him. "I just wish Jeff was here…"
"Who's Jeff?" Jeff asked quickly. "Jeff's a nice name."
"Jeff is my best friend in the whole world," Nick declared.
"Well great!" Jeff said. "Why don't you run right out and get him?" Jeff opened the door to indicate Nick should leave.
"Great idea! I'll call him!" Nick exclaimed Jeff slammed the door.
"No, cell phones don't work in here…" Jeff began, but then his iPhone, upside down on the table, started to ring as Nick held his phone to his ear. "I guess they fixed it." Nick stared at the ringing phone.
"Are you gonna get that?" Nick asked.
"No, I'm talking to you, that would be rude," Jeff said. A few more rings, then– "Well, I guess he's not home." Jeff took Nick's phone, mashing the end call button. Jeff's pone on the table immediately silenced.
"Wow, that was weird," Nick said.
"Why don't I just give you an autograph for him?" Jeff asked, quickly taking a poster and signing it to 'Jeff'. Suddenly from the window came another voice.
"What about me? I'm the one who loves you!" Sebastian yelled. Finally his head came over the window ledge and saw Jeff with whipped cream all over his face. "You're much paler in person.'
"Yeah… I am," Jeff agreed. "Gosh, it was great to me you guys, but I gotta go." He pushed Nick to the door.
"Can't I shampoo and condition your beautiful blond hair?" Sebastian asked. "Or… actually, I can think of a whole slew of shower related things we could do." Panicking, Jeff threw a nearby towel at Sebastian.
"Really, I'm flattered, but no. Have a towel," Jeff said.
"RikeЯ's towel!" Sebastian exclaimed. Then he promptly fell from where he was hanging onto the second story window. "It's okay, none of my blood got on the towel!" Jeff opened the door and motioned Nick should leave.
"Well, I guess I'm leaving too," Nick said, dragging his feet, because he is a 15-year-old boy and this is such a plausible thing that he would do, obviously. "Without even a towel as a souvenir… Nothing but my memories… which will fade too, too quickly…" Jeff sighed deeply.
"Here," he said, picking up his tie from the table and handing it to Nick.
"Oh, my Gosh, the actual tie you wore on the actual stage!" Nick exclaimed. "I can't believe it!" Jeff bounced up and down as he impatiently waited for Nick to leave. As he did so, his necklace bounced out of his bathrobe. "Hey, my best friend has a necklace, just like that!" Nick said, reaching for it. "He drew this tiny J on the–" Nick stopped as he turned the pick over and there was the tiniest J doodled on the tip. "Just like that." Nick took the towel from Jeff's hair, letting the pristinely blond, streakless hair fall down, and used the towel to wipe the cream off Jeff's face.
"Ta-da…" Jeff said, cringing. Nick was stunned silent. "Sorry?" Nick sank onto the nearby couch. Jeff sat next to him, wiping the rest of the cream off his face. "Nick, I know you're upset I didn't tell you. But you can't just freeze me out like this. Please talk to me."
"I thought we were friends," Nick said. "But I guess I was wrong, since you kept basically the biggest secret ever, Jeffery Sterling –slash– RikeЯ with a backward R!"
"Okay, well, other than that… did you enjoy the concert?" Jeff asked. Nick just looked at the piece of paper in his hands.
"I am so out of here," Nick finally said, getting up and storming into the hall.
"Nick, wait!" Jeff said, hurrying after him. "I wanted to tell you! It's just… I was afraid. You know, I thought maybe you wouldn't be my friend anymore and you'd like RikeЯ more than you like me."
"That's what you thought?" Nick asked. "That will never happen, Jeff, don't you know that? RikeЯ's a celebrity I get obsessed with one week out of the year. You're my best friend, who I happen to have only known for that specific one week."
"Really?" Jeff smiled.
"Yeah," Nick said.
"No more secrets," Jeff said. "And to prove it, I want to show you something."
"You ready?" Jeff asked, huge smile on his face.
"Why are we in your closet? I came out of one of these a long time ago, and I am not going back now, not even for fucking Narnia," Nick said.
"Because behind my closet is… my closet!" Jeff grinned, pushing aside a curtain. "And also, I was lying about not being unpacked. I did this the first day." Nick's eyes went wide. A rainbow of colored and patterned button-ups, 150 different ties, rack after rack of Holister sweatshirts, leather jackets, and skinny jeans. An entire wall of converse, and even a few pairs of leather lace-up books. At least six guitars were standing there as well.
"This is one closet I can get on board with," Nick exclaimed. "Wait til Blaine and Sebastian find out! Here, take my phone. Get a picture of me with one of these guitars!"
"Nicky," Jeff whined. "You can't tell anyone!"
"Why not?" Nick asked.
"Once people find out I'm RikeЯ, they won't treat me the same!"
"Duh! That's the whole point!" Nick said. "You'd be promoted to lead solist of the Warbelrs faster than lightning. I'm talking mega-popularity for both of us. Solos every week!"
"No!"
"How can you be so selfish?" Nick asked. "I thought you were my best friend. You should want this for me!"
"Well if you were my best friend, you'd understand why I can't do it!" Jeff exclaimed.
"Come on, cut me some slack, RikeЯ!" Nick whined.
"RikeЯ? I knew this would happen," Jeff sighed.
"Did I say RikeЯ? I didn't mean that, it was a mistake," Nick said.
"No, the mistake was trusting someone I've only known for six days," Jeff said. Nick was stunned silent.
Jeff's mom was downstairs when Nick came through.
"Hello, Nick dear," Jeff's mom said. "I think things are going to be a lot better around here now that you know our little secret." Nick didn't say anything, just stormed out. "Or not." 20 seconds later, Jeff came downstairs, grabbed a spoon, a pint of Ben and Jerry's, and sat on the couch.
"I am so mad!" Jeff yelled.
"Want to talk about it?" Mama Sterling asked.
"No," Jeff said, with a big mouthful of ice cream. "Everything I was afraid would happen, happened. How did I manage to me so wrong?"
"Nick just needs time to process, sweetie. He'll come around," Jeff's mom told him.
Jeff spent most of Saturday by himself, in his room, doodling in his song book. No lyrics were coming to him. He honestly couldn't get Nick's heartbroken face out of his head. Around three, Jeff was curled into a chair in the living room, doodling in his book when a lonely skateboard rolled in the open door.
"Nick alert," Jeff said sadly. Nick stood in the door, not coming in, just looking.
"Hey… can I talk to you for a second?" Nick asked.
"That depends. Talk to who, Jeff or RikeЯ?" Jeff asked.
"Jeff," Nick said, finally crossing the threshold.
"Well, he's not talking to you," Jeff said, getting up and walking across the living room to the kitchen.
"Wait, Jeff, I'm sorry I called you RikeЯ," Nick said. "That was major news, but I was acting like a 12 year old girl and I'm really sorry."
"What happens if you can't get used to it?" Jeff asked. "What happens the next time Blaine beats you for a solo or Sebastian makes a pass at you? Are you just going to lost it and burst out yelling about how your best friend in the whole world is secretly a superstar?"
"I'll want to, but I won't," Nick said. "Because my best friend is Jeff Sterling and he trusted me with his deepest, darkest secret. And that means more to me than any solo." Jeff looked at his feet. "I've said everything… so I'm just gonna go." Nick started dragging his feet in the direction of the door he'd come in. "Here I go… Headed for the door… after making the best apology I could possibly think of…" He turned and gave Jeff a pout. Jeff raised his eyebrows skeptically, so Nick continued. "Still hoping he forgives me! Halfway there…."
"You are a 12 year old girl," Jeff laughed. Nick turned around to see Jeff's unbelievable smile.
"Friends again?" Nick asked.
"You bet," Jeff agreed. Nick rushed across the room and hugged Jeff tightly.
Monday morning at school, Blaine and Sebastian were telling anyone who would listen about the concert.
"We were right next to the stage," Blaine said. "RikeЯ sang Cali Girls right at us!"
"Which isn't as big a deal as the fact that RikeЯ gave me his towel," Sebastian said. "In his dressing room. He really did."
"Yeah, right," Trent said, rolling his eyes.
"But he did," Sebastian grumbled under his breath.
"Forget it, Bastian, it's not worth it," Nick advised.
"No, it's true," Jeff interjected. "And he gave Nick something too."
"What are you doing?" Nick hissed as Jeff pulled the turquoise tie out of Nick's bag.
"Trust me," Jeff winked.
"That's RikeЯ's tie!" Blaine exclaimed. "From the concert!"
"Yeah, RikeЯ gave it to him," Jeff said proudly.
"But you know what…" Nick said. "You guys are much cooler than me. I mean, after all, your brother got us the tickets. You should have it." Nick handed the tie to Blaine, who stared at it, awestruck.
"Oh my God," Blaine exclaimed.
"What about me?" Sebastian asked.
"Pipe down, you got a towel," Nick said.
"Let me see that tie," Trent said, reaching for it, but Blaine tugged it away.
"Bastian, you might want to run," Nick said in an undertone. Sebastian got up and stood behind Jeff. Jeff and Nick looked at each other, then at the same time.
"Hey, everybody, look, it's RikeЯ's tie!" Nick and Jeff shouted. Jeff pushed Sebastian out of the way as 200 guys trampled Blaine and Trent.
"It's a gay school, I don't care what you guys say," Sebastian said, shaking his head as he pulled ahead of them, walking towards homeroom.
"I really liked that tie though," Nick said sadly.
"Maybe he'll give you another one," Jeff shrugged. They caught each other's eyes and grinned. "No, but really, it's from Express, we can go to the mall after school."
A/N: Do we like it, do we not like it? Leave me a review.
Should I bother writing more? Next episode's already done... so...?
Samantha.