I don't own Yu Gi Oh…

                                                          Kicked to the Curb

   Bakura grumbled to himself as the last of his luggage was sat onto the curb and the taxi pulled off. Of all the days to be evicted, it just had to be one where it was raining. Turning around, he looked up at the place that was going to be his home for a while. As much as he didn't want to, Bakura was forced to call his hikari and beg for a place to stay. (Which was no easy task due to the fact that Ryou had already kicked him out twice for…uuh…happening to find random bodies in the basement.)

   Bakura struggled to carry his belongings up the steps and through the door. (It happened to be locked so he had to scrounge around for the spare key, which only made him grumpier.)

   "Why the hell did he lock the door?" He muttered to himself, entering the foyer and dropping his luggage right on the spot.

   The first thing he did was make a b line for the fridge. He was starving, and the only shit that was left at his apartment (after the refrigerator had been taken) was mayonnaise that had some funk growing on it.

   Before he opened the fridge door, he noticed a note put there by Ryou.

   ::Bakura,

         I'm on a date, don't know when I'll be back but make yourself at home.

         Ryou

            P.S. When I say make yourself at home…I use the term loosely.::

   Bakura simply snorted as he crumpled up the letter and proceeded on his quest to find food. Looking through the fridge all he could find were some bean sprouts, and other assorted veggies, sake, and some gray looking shit that when he picked it up, felt like putty.

   Becoming desperate he continued his search in the cabinets, but nothing looked any better. That funked up mayonnaise was beginning to look quite appetizing.

   Scowling, he slammed the cabinet door shut and walked into the living room, tracking mud in with him. He flopped down on the couch, and decided to watch some TV while he drifted off to sleep.

                                                * * *

Ryou was met with a nasty surprise when he led Malik into the foyer. Bakura's luggage was sprawled out all over the place.

   "Is there something you wanna tell me?" Malik asked curiously. Ryou had "failed" to tell him that Bakura would be living with him for a while, because he knew that it would dampen Malik's spirits. Which is something that Ryou didn't particularly care to do because, when Malik was angry…shit happened.

   "N-no, why?" He asked nervously. He peered into the living room, and saw Bakura, out like a light. 'Oh god.' He sighed mentally. "How bout we go into the kitchen." He suggested, wanting to keep Malik from seeing Bakura.

   "The kitchen huh?" Malik said with a grin as he playfully nipped at Ryou's neck. "Sure…we've never done it there."

    "Uhhh heh…s-sure." He replied, wanting to do anything to keep Malik from seeing the knocked out mess on the couch.

   Now, it wasn't that Malik didn't like Bakura…well, he didn't like him too much…but Malik tended to get jealous over the two, even when he and Ryou weren't even dating.

   Ryou had also failed to tell Bakura that he was seeing Malik for fear that Bakura would do everything in his power to try and ruin the relationship. He had asked Ryou out before. Ryou tried it, and came to the conclusion that even though they looked alike…they acted nothing alike. Bakura was a slob and a narcissistic sex freak. Although…Malik wasn't much different in that area.

   The two entered the kitchen to find it ripped to shreds. Drawers pulled out and cabinet doors left open, along with mud tracks on the floor. '

   "Oh my Gods Ryou…what happened?" Malik said, assessing the damages.

   "Uh…erm." Ryou darted his eyes around the kitchen, to afraid to be mad at Bakura at that moment.

   "Well, obviously we can't have sex in here." Malik said with a grin as he made his way through the kitchen and to the living room.

   "No!" Ryou yelled, grabbing onto Malik's arm. "No, that's ok…I-I like it dirty." He said, trying his best to sound sexy, but there was still a quiver in his voice.

   "That's foul Ryou…seriously…mud everywhere. C'mon, we can try the living room once." Malik pulled on his arm as Ryou braced himself for hell.

   Coming to a halt in the middle of the living room, Malik's jaw dropped.

   "What the hell!" He screamed.

At that, Bakura shot up so fast that he fell off the couch.

   "I didn't do it, I swear!" He yelled, still half asleep. Coming to grips with himself, and finally realizing who was in the living room, he felt his face grow hot.

   "How long has he been here Ryou? Huh? And how long did you think it would last before I found out!?" Malik yelled, advancing on Ryou. "So, are you seeing him again? Or is he just "staying here" like he always does?"

   "Oh, sorry Malik." Bakura spoke up as he walked over to Ryou and put his arm around him. "Hate for it to be like this but he's mine."

   "No I'm not!" Ryou ripped Bakura's hand off of him and gave Malik a pleading look. "Malik, I'm sorry…I should have told you sooner. Um…Bakura's gunna stay here for a short time. A SHORT TIME!" He repeated glaring at Bakura. "But, that doesn't mean anything, honestly."

   "Oh, Ryou, I got a question." Bakura said.

   "What!" Ryou snapped, loosing his temper with Bakura already.

   "Where the hell is all the real food? I'm starving!"

   "Malik's a vegetarian." He stated simply, feeling that it needed no explanation.

   "So?" Bakura asked, wanting to know what that had to do with anything.

   "Well…uhh…" Ryou looked at the ground, blushing slightly.

    "We're getting married." Malik said definably.

    "Huh-wha?" Bakura's eyes shot wide open, and he couldn't believe what he had just heard.

   "Yea…and I've called a marriage councilor." Ryou added. "We have a ten o'clock meeting tomorrow.

   "Psh…well have fun ruining your life." Bakura snorted.

   "You're coming." Ryou said sadly to him.

   "What!!" Both Bakura and Malik screamed in unison.

   "I told the counselor about our…uh…circumstances…and he finds that it would be best if you were to come along."

   "Oh, hell no. No nonononononono!" Bakura screamed shaking his head. "I came here to stay for a while…not to get caught up in your uuh…disgusting love life." He added staring at Malik with the look of utmost loathing.

   "And if you wish to continue living here, you'll go to that marriage counseling or your sorry, freeloading ass can sleep in a dumpster!" Ryou snapped. "Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm going to make dinner."

   With that, he walked out of the room followed by Malik, who didn't look all that happy.

   Bakura flopped back down on the sofa and scowled. "No good…goddamn bastard…going to a freggin' councilor." 

                                       * * *

   "Ryou…I mean…I, don't think this is such a good idea." Malik whispered softly while the two set the table. "Bakura…isn't the most civil person. Hell, if we keep him there too long he might end up killing the counselor."

   "Like you wouldn't?" Ryou sniggered as he put the pot of tomato based sauce on the table.

   "Well…yea, but I haven't tried to kill anyone in a long time. I know you don't like it. But Bakura doesn't seem to get the picture." Malik put down two plates, but Ryou scolded him and made him put down another one, insisting that Bakura was going to eat with them.

   "I tried…" He whispered to himself. Ryou heard him and gave him that look that he couldn't stand.

   "What?!" He whined.

   "I want you two to be nice to each other. You don't have to talk to him, but just be civilized."

   "Ok…" He responded gloomily.

   "Thank you." Ryou gave Malik a short but sweet peck on the lips before he sat three pairs of chopsticks down.

   "What's for dinner?" Bakura asked, marching into the kitchen and taking a seat. He saw the pot of sauce and smiled. "Ooo, spaghetti and meatballs-"

   "No meatballs." Ryou said as he and Malik took their places.

   "What the…oh yea." He flopped his head in his hand. "I'm gunna die here." He moaned.

   Ryou ignored him and served up the noodles, pouring the tomato sauce over them.

   Malik began with a salad, and Bakura just stared at him, muttering something that sounded like "Sissy food."

   "So, Malik tell me something." Bakura started.

   "What?"

   "Why is it exactly that you don't eat meat?" He asked with a hint of amusement.

   "Well, it's cruel. Have you ever seen the conditions these animals live in before they're heartlessly slaughtered?" Malik responded.

   "You've got to be kidding me…you mean to tell me that you don't eat meat because you feel sorry for a cow?" Bakura struggled to keep from laughing when he noticed the look on Ryou's face. "So, you can kill people and be all heartless and cruel, but you can't eat a meatball?"

   "That's enough Bakura." Ryou said calmly.

Bakura snorted, and Malik glared at him as he stuffed his mouth with noodles. The three continued their meal in silence, until Ryou felt Malik playing footsies with him. Ryou smiled coyly at him, and Malik stared back, not in a cute way, but looking confused.

   Ryou felt Malik's foot rub up his leg and he raised an eyebrow. Malik continued to look clueless and Ryou looked under the table to find Bakura's foot on his leg.

   "Bakura!!" He yelled.

   "What!?" He shouted, trying to sound innocent.

   "You are so annoying! You act like a five year old!" Ryou slammed his chopsticks down on the table, excused himself, and left Bakura laughing uncontrollably at the table.

   Malik couldn't stand to even be in the same room with the annoying fucker, so he left as well.

   Bakura seemed to not have noticed, because he continued to laugh.

   "I can't stand him!" Ryou said as Malik hugged him close. "If that counselor doesn't get through to him, I'm kicking him out."

   Malik raised his eyebrows a little. It wasn't like his little Ryou to be this heartless, but having Bakura out of the house did seem rather appealing.

   "Shh…it's ok." He said soothingly. "I'm sure he'll get through to Bakura. Somehow…"

   "I hope…for Bakura's sake."

   "Lets stop thinking about Bakura…we haven't had a moment to ourselves all afternoon."

   Ryou smiled as Malik pushed him down on the couch and climbed on top of him. Slowly, Malik unbuttoned Ryou's shirt and spread it open, trailing his fingers down his lover's stomach.

   Ryou chuckled. "That tickles." He said, picking up Malik's hand and moving it up to his lips, kissing it softly.

   "You're too cute." Malik smiled, coming in close until he could feel Ryou's warm breath on his face. There was absolutely nothing about Ryou that didn't drive him crazy. Ryou, the sweet innocent little boy that Malik had met months ago while teaming up with Bakura at Battle City. Every little thing that Ryou did to him was amazing.

   He brought his lips down on Ryou's when he felt movement at the other end of the couch. He didn't want to move, he wanted to kiss those lips forever, but when he felt someone push his legs, he had to pull away.

   "Get a room."

   Turning around Malik and Ryou scowled at him as they sat up.

   "What? I'm trying to watch TV here." Bakura said, as if he had done nothing wrong.

Discusted, Ryou got up from the couch, and ran to his bedroom.

   "You know, this is Ryou's house. You could show some manners you pig." Malik snapped before he too left the living room.

   "Blaa blaa blaa." Bakura mocked. "Good, now I have the whole couch."

                                            * * *

 That's chappie one. Don't forget to review!! Arigato!