Summary: Just some Christmas fluff, 'cause I've loved Buffy since I was old enough to appreciate her, and I think she'll always be one of my all-time favorite fanfic characters. Faith's majorly out of character, but I like her better this way. Kind of AU if you want to think about it like that. Anyway, hope you enjoy. I might add more, 'cause I've kind of got a plot going in my head, but anyone who's read my other stuff knows how well that goes... plus I've got summer assignments I have to finish, so...
Review if you'd like. It would help convince me to continue if you enjoy this.
The door slammed shut behind her and the cold air immediately began to tear at her small frame.
"I guess this would be a bad time for Merry Christmas…" a quiet voice said.
Buffy's head snapped up at the sudden disruption of silence, and also at the all-too-ironic truth in the statement that had been uttered. Faith was standing before her, hands behind her back, a worried frown on her face. It was dark, but the tiny blonde could see the worry in the dark depths just as easily as the brunette could see the silvery tears streaking the blonde's cheeks.
Buffy sniffled, wiping at her nose. She inhaled deeply. "Yeah, I guess so…."
She didn't want to cry, especially not in front of the other girl; she didn't want her junior Slayer to see her weakness. She had fled to the porch to avoid the questioning gazes and words of her friends, and Giles, and her mother and sister, but she obviously wasn't going to be left alone. She hurt, despite her attempts to will it away, and grudgingly settled for silence, though she wasn't angry. She simply didn't want to cry, but she couldn't stop, and it hurt more.
Faith took a slow step forward, studying the little Slayer intently. She had been hoping to catch Buffy in a good mood so that, just maybe, they could spend a good day together; maybe it would just be a peaceful, quiet day filled with warmth and merriment, a day that they could both forget their calling and be normal teenagers obsessing over gifts and thoughtlessly happy with the Christmas spirit. She'd had hope stretching miles long for a good Christmas, as it was her first one away from home, but apparently something had gone wrong. The first reason being that she was late, and the second being that the blonde she had come to see apparently wasn't under the spell of Christmas.
Buffy stared silently at her tiny steel-toe-boot-encased feet, her arms drawn tightly into her own embrace, shoulders trembling. Perhaps the embrace was protection from the cold, as she was clad only in a thin white cotton sweater and it wasn't exactly the middle of July, or, in Faith's opinion the better explanation, as a form of comfort. She sniffled periodically, and her stance shifted every few seconds, sometimes as simple as the slight shuffle of her feet, but always moving in some sort of constant, distressed motion.
Obviously, the tiny blonde was upset about something, and it didn't feel right to the other Slayer to see her drawn so far into herself, sobbing quietly, avoiding Faith's eyes and looking as if she were trying to shut out the world with just her arms and her tightly closed eyelids, a silent prayer for peace; it was a terrible sight to see, especially on Christmas when her mother and friends were inside waiting for her. Who had hurt the blonde so badly?
"What happened?" the brunette asked gently.
Buffy didn't answer right away, instead raising a hand to brush at her pink-tinged nose. A tiny sniffle followed, and she swallowed against the tightness of her throat. Her eyes hurt.
Sighing and deciding that it would be alright to abandon the precious parcel she had spent days worrying over for the sake of trying to calm the other girl, she deposited the gift on the porch bench and raised her hands to the little blonde's arms, attempting to rub some warmth back into her tiny frame. She had worked meticulously on the first gift for what had felt like forever and a half by the time she was finished, and had redone it nearly a million times, but at that moment, as Buffy sniffled quietly and remained still under her gentle hands, it didn't matter all that much. "B?" she whispered, trailing her hands up to Buffy's shoulders.
Buffy sniffled. It hurt too much; she couldn't keep it in anymore. "I, uhm…" she paused to take in a shaky breath, and continued, "I just got a call… from my dad, that's all…." She closed her eyes, as if the darkness would help her forget the memory of what that call had meant.
Faith frowned, her touch growing firmer and more determined as a gentle shiver rippled through the blonde's body. Normally, she never would have even dreamt of being so forward, but Buffy's need for comfort gave her strength. "Somehow, I doubt it was just to let you know your present would be a few days late…" she said quietly, and the blonde continued to avoid her eyes. She brushed gentle fingertips against her senior Slayer's jaw, urging the other girl raise her gaze. Glistening hazel eyes lifted slowly, fresh tears on the verge of breaking forth. Faith's heart burned, even despite the bite of winter chill. "What did he say, Buffy?"
"Oh, not much," the older slayer said, raising her eyes farther to stare at the moon that lurked just above Faith's shoulder, hoping for casualty, though the way her voice cracked as it hit Faith's ears was far less casual than she would have liked. "You know, just that… just that I'm never going to see him again…." Her throat was painfully tight, seeming to collapse upon itself as her eyes stung and burned. Surprisingly enough, she didn't break down, even as Faith's arms encircled her completely and pulled her into a warm embrace.
Was it strange to think that she liked it there, she wondered. Strange that she was focused more on the welcomed sensations overtaking her than the fact that her father was gone from her life? She wasn't sure; she only knew that she felt inexplicably safe in that embrace, even though she wasn't in need of protection, and she was cozier than the warmest and fuzziest of warm and fuzzy, as if she had a human blanket wrapped around her.
She felt, perhaps even… loved?
Satisfied that the older Slayer wasn't in danger of a serious meltdown, and allowing a tiny smile to tug at her lips when the little blonde slid her arms around her waist under the cover of her leather jacket, the brunette sighed. At such a time, humor might have seemed imprudent to anyone else, but Faith made it work, if only for the sake preserving Buffy's stability.
"Some Christmas present," Faith whispered, voice light. Buffy sniffled. "Who taught that guy how to shop for gifts?" Tiny sensations drew together in a feather-light vibration against her chest, but the brunette couldn't tell if her attempts were having the desired affect or one more adverse to her wishes. The thought toyed with her decision, but she continued anyway. "I mean, they've always said shopping for teens is hard, but damn, he's just plain horrible."
The vibrations grew stronger; Buffy was giggling.
"Grandma Summers was never good with gifts either…" the tiny blonde admitted as a soft mumble into her sister Slayer's collarbone; she nuzzled it briefly, failing to notice her action.
Faith smiled softly, glad that she had saved the older girl from impending waterworks. She chose to ignore the blonde's action, focusing on the task at hand: keeping Buffy from falling back into herself. She hated to see Buffy sad. The little Slayer was just too bright of a person; it was torture to put a light like that out. "Like mother, like father, then, huh?" she asked.
Buffy nodded into the brunette's shoulder, and it was an incredibly childish action, but she was undeniably the cutest child Faith had ever seen. She smiled in a silent response and rubbed soothing circles into Buffy's back; the tiny blonde all but melted into her. 'I love Christmas,' the older Slayer gushed and tightened her embrace around Faith's waist. Ridding herself of her final sniffle, the blonde turned glistening hazel eyes upward to meet the brunette's gaze. She pulled back slowly, and the brunette's breath fogged the air before her; her own reached out to meet it, and the two danced between them in the winter chill.
Buffy glanced off to the side, embarrassed. "Thanks…" she mumbled.
Faith smiled softly, raising a hand to tuck silken locks of blonde behind a pink-tinged ear. "You don't have to thank me, Buffy," she whispered, and a flush colored the blonde's cheeks. The blushing Slayer raised her eyes slowly as gentle thumbs brushed against her pink cheeks, a soft caress to wipe away the long forgotten tears that clung to her flesh. She inhaled a shaky breath, and her blood grew heated, the pink darkening to a redder state. The brunette's smile widened the tiniest bit. "I just can't stand to see you upset."
The blonde dropped her eyes and remained silent, ignoring the insistent urge to smile, and playing idly with the hem of the brunette's shirt instead, which was strangely available to her, since she had neglected to drop her arms from around Faith's waist; she was in no rush to let go. Finally catching sight of the small boxes that rested just off to her left on their bench, she turned questioning eyes upwards to her junior Slayer. "What's that?"
Faith blinked, and her eyes fell to the gift. She had almost forgotten about her impending doom. "That?" she asked flatly, as if she was surprised it had been brought up.
"Mmm," the blonde hummed, which, in her own mind, meant a sort of, 'yes, that.'
"That… is… your present…" the brunette said haltingly, and Buffy caught the tension in her words. Faith took a deep breath, and though the blonde expected her to reach for the gift, she slipped her jacket from her shoulders instead. Confused hazel eyes met her own, but Faith only smiled. She fit the jacket over Buffy's narrow shoulders; the older Slayer frowned.
"I'm okay, Faith," she said. The other Slayer was wearing long sleeves, a black thermal-type material with red stitching and sleeves with hems that nearly passed her knuckles, but it was comfortably loose on her frame and the material was too thin, and it wouldn't help at all against the cold. The blonde reasoned that she probably had another shirt on underneath, but she attempted to refuse the jacket still warm with the heat from Faith's body anyway, despite the fuzzy feeling she got in her stomach and the butterflies dancing happily in the same place as a quick dance of hummingbird-paced movements. "You can wear it…."
The brunette would have none of it.
"It's alright," the younger slayer said, and tugged the leather tighter on the blonde's slight frame, indulgent smile curving her lips, eyes shining brightly.
Buffy finally relented and gripped the lapels of the jacket tightly. It was at least a size too big, and the cuffs met her second set of knuckles at their full lengths, but it was warm and she got the feeling that she might have a hard time relinquishing it. She snuggled into the leather, but hoped it wasn't too obvious. Faith was just the kind of person who would have let her keep it if she knew how much she really liked it. Although, honestly, the jacket looked better on the brunette, and it felt better to be drawn into the warmth from the front with those strong arms around her rather than just wearing it herself, but she was sure to keep that to herself.
Faith's smile dimmed as she reached for her gifts. She had been worrying about giving the gifts to the blonde for weeks, as they were both very personal and could very well give reason for the older Slayer to never speak to her again, or at least change something between them, but in the end, she decided to take the chance and hope for the best. She had always been told that if you didn't take an opportunity as it came, you'd never get anything out of life. 'What's life without a little risk here and there?' her uncles would say, and she believed them.
But as she stood before Buffy, reaching for her gifts with shaking hands, hoping the other girl didn't notice, it seemed that she was taking a risk too great for chance. She breathed deep through her nose, attempting to steady herself, but it only helped minutely, if at all. Ignoring the slight shiver that passed through her, she centered herself before her senior Slayer.
Buffy was waiting patiently, and the brunette took a deep breath.
"Merry Christmas, Buffy."
The brunette's voice was soft, nervous, and it woke the millions of butterflies in Buffy's stomach that had begun to settle and shook them into hummingbird motion once more. She took the offered gift slowly, anticipation playing at her nerves, shaking her hands slightly as she did. There were two black boxes, both in small stature, the smallest resting on top of the larger one. They were tied together with a delicate length of silver ribbon.
Hazel orbs fluttered between the gifts and Faith's eyes, brown depths alight with the same anticipation coursing eagerly through the other girl. Buffy smiled softly and tugged gently at the pretty silver ribbon that shone bright in the moonlight; it gave way easily. She held it out to her sister Slayer. "I want to keep it," she said quietly, and Faith nodded.
She also held out the larger box, and Faith accepted it while the blonde's trembling fingers worked at opening the smaller box. Inside, nestled gently into a pearly-white, silken cushion, lay a bracelet. The base structure was a smooth thread, braided together beautifully, like those complicated hemp designs she could never figure out, but in an elegantly crafted order, several polished stones were woven into the designs. She smiled softly, tracing its outline lightly with gentle fingertips. 'Where in the world did she find this?' she wondered.
"I know it's not much…" the brunette said quietly, shoulders hunched slightly, a nervous tension coloring her voice. "It's the thought that counts, though, right?" she asked, as if she was trying to reassure herself rather than ask the question. Truly, that's what she was doing. It seemed like a brilliant idea when she thought of it so long ago, but just then, she wasn't so sure. "I just thought maybe it would be worth more in meaning because it took me forever to finish…." Her voice was rushed, and it seemed that her heart might explode at any minute.
Buffy raised her eyes, fingers stilled over the chilled surfaces of the little stones. Faith had her bottom lip clutched nervously in her teeth as she waited for a response, her hands shoved deep into her pockets. It was terribly endearing, and the blonde smiled softly at the sight. "You made this?"
The younger Slayer nodded hesitantly. "Mmhmm." She fidgeted, uncomfortable, chewing on the inside of her lip, but her next words came soon after. "I'm sorry it's not better…" she said, and paused briefly; she continued almost immediately afterward. "I must have re-braided it a thousand times," she admitted, rolling her eyes at herself. "And those stones took forever to polish into the right shape…." She was growing increasingly nervous. "I'm sorry."
"No," Buffy whispered gently, finally tearing her eyes away from the gift. She looked up to gaze into the other girl's eyes. Her eyes were soft, full of the reassurance Faith needed, and her voice was completely honest when she said, "No, it's beautiful. I love it."
Faith nodded slowly, letting out a tense breath.
Buffy trailed her fingers lightly over the stones. There were different colors, all of them perfectly polished into tiny, gleaming spheres. "Do they mean anything?" she asked.
Faith blanched. She had hoped the blonde wouldn't ask if there was any intention behind the stones, for each time she thought about it, the idea grew increasingly childish in her mind. "Yeah… stuff like those bracelets in the mall, you know…" she replied quietly; there was no point in lying. "Blue for strength, green for health. Stuff like that…." A short moment later, she frowned, continuing, "It was a stupid idea, but… I don't know…. I just remembered you said you used to collect them when you lived in LA, but you lost them when you moved here, so…."
Buffy smiled softly; it was such a Faith thing to do. "Thank you," she said sincerely, and the unhindered honesty in her voice caused an easy smile to overtake Faith's face, unbeknownst to her. The blonde gently lifted the bracelet from the box and offered it to its creator. "Help me put it on?" she asked, and the brunette nodded. Trading boxes and items to allow Faith to tie the bracelet on Buffy's delicate wrist, the blonde smiled. She kept a light grasp on the still unopened box, and gave the smaller box and the ribbon to the younger girl. She didn't fail to notice the brunette's huge intake of breath.
Faith's heart hammered in her chest. 'Here it comes….'
Buffy held in her gasp of surprise. Inside the second box was a shining silver choker, the links drawn together in a delicate embrace of tiny rings. Dangling from the bottom on its own silver ring was a sparkling silver heart set with tiny diamonds and a beautifully scripted letter B.
"Oh, Faith, it's beautiful!" she gushed quietly.
Faith smiled at her reaction, but her joy didn't last long.
The blonde treated the necklace in the same manner she had treated the bracelet, trailing gentle fingers along the smooth coldness of it. She glanced up at the fidgeting girl before her. "This must have cost a fortune…" she said, frowning at the thought.
Faith exhaled a tense chuckle. "Yeah, a small one…."
Buffy's frown deepened.
The brunette smiled and continued, "But it was worth it…."
The smile tugging at her lips couldn't be denied, and Buffy returned her gaze to the lightly shimmering treasure in her hands. "It really is beautiful…" she whispered quietly.
Faith smiled lightly, but her throat was tight and her hands were shaking, and it wasn't the cold that shook her. It was then or never. She took a deep breath, one of the deepest she had probably ever taken in her life, and said, "There's, uh, there's something on the back…."
Buffy glanced up at the brunette, small smile still playing on her lips, and slowly flipped the heart over. She expected maybe a reference to being a Slayer, possibly a message bearing, 'The Chosen One,' or something of the sorts, but what she saw instead was another letter in the same elegant script as her B, except without the diamonds; a single letter F.
She blinked slowly, confused; Faith gulped.
"It's… it's a figurative way of giving you my heart, B… 'cause you have it…."
Buffy raised glossy eyes to look at the other girl. Faith's hands were shoved deep into her pockets and she stared intently into the glistening hazel depths, tense, awaiting the inevitable letdown. Her heart was faltering, a dying beat beneath her ribcage. It hurt just waiting for the older girl to say something, and she wasn't looking forward to the real thing.
Buffy opened her mouth; Faith closed her eyes.
"Help me put it on?"
Faith blinked open disbelieving brown eyes, but Buffy was smiling softly. With trembling fingers, the brunette removed the necklace from its cushion, and the smaller Slayer turned so she could fasten the catch. When Buffy turned back to her sister Slayer, Faith was still tense.
"It's kind of fitting that the F faces down…" the blonde said quietly, reaching up to trace the silver heart thoughtfully with gentle fingertips, and Faith's small hopes fell instantly. She sighed in resignation, swallowing the hard lump in her throat, and waiting for dismissal. Buffy continued softly, "It's realistic. It shows how close you are to my heart…."
Once again, Faith looked up, surprised.
Buffy blushed; the red tinge reached from the tips of her ears across her cheeks.
Together they shared a nervous chuckle, which turned into quiet laughter of relief.
A bold hand took hold of Buffy's brain. Rising to her tiptoes anxiously, bouncing lightly on the balls of her feet, she dropped a quick kiss on Faith's cheek, so fast that the taller Slayer barely felt the brush of lightly-glossed lips against her skin or the hands that took hold of her elbows to garner a slight balance. Buffy returned flat on her feet just as quickly as she had risen, casting a nervous glance skyward before dropping her eyes to stare at her feet, silent, cheeks burning fiercely.
Faith smiled and looked up as well.
Mistletoe.
Buffy raised hesitant eyes to see the other girl's reaction, an insistent, although hesitant, smile tugging at the corners of her lips. The brunette held Buffy's gaze as she leaned forward slowly, and the blonde leaned in too. It was a tradition, after all….
