I'm setting you free Elena

It was ironic how not long ago Elena Gilbert had told Damon Salvatore the almost exact same words I care about you Damon, which is why I have to let you go. Caring, she had cared, cared enough to let him go by not putting him through the turmoil of hell, and he had done the same thing tonight, he had let her go, not because he cared, no it was much more then that, he had set her free because of how much he loves her. More than anything Damon had wanted to fight through this sire bond, to tell it to go straight to hell, but he kept reminding himself over and over how it had been the right thing to do. Each new statement that he delivered he found himself holding onto the foolish hope that maybe, just maybe they had been wrong, maybe she wasn't sired, but then he watched as recognition processed on her face, her expression taking in his each word, obeying her master.

This is what I want

That had been a flat out lie, what he wanted was what he had told her this morning to throw her back into his bed and never let her leave, and yeah clearly that was impossible considering they had lives to live and evil to kill, but all Damon had wanted was to isolate the world for just a bit more and revel in those last sweet moments with Elena. It had been the sole reason for why Damon had agreed to go on the road trip with her to put a five second pause on their hectic life, on their doomed relationship if you could even call it that considering it had never even had the chance to start. Unfortunately for Damon even five seconds he wasn't allowed to have, because the moment his brother called him asking if he had seen Elena, Damon had lied, and to make matters worse when Stefan had asked if Damon had gone through with it he found himself taking the cowards way out and fibbing about that only in the end to have his little brother ask if he was okay. The phone call ended abruptly because Damon felt if he stayed on the line any longer he would have confessed right then and there.

This is what will make me happy

He had actually been so surprised that he had been able to coolly deliver that line without choking up, because having Elena sent away was far from the definition of making Damon happy. For years Damon hadn't had the chance of being happy, and then finally, finally after the aching, longing, pain and all those other negative emotions he had been given happiness, and then just like that it had been violently ripped away from him leaving the Vampire feeling like nothing but an empty shell.

It had taken everything in Damon to keep his feet planted to the ground as he watched Bonnie's car disappear from view, his gaze locked on the back of Elena's chocolate tresses the whole entire time trying to memorize every beautiful detail of her not knowing when the next time he'd see her would be. Pathetic, he found himself feeling absolutely pathetic, because she hadn't even been gone a whole five minutes and already he felt the earth shattering beneath him, or was that his heart?

The sound of the door shutting caused the blue eyed man to move from his spot, his gaze shifting towards the cabin, like hell he wanted to be there right now. Professor Shady Pants may had been all wise and revealing but Damon still found himself suspicious of him, not to mention his cock blocking skills were perfectly in tact considering every time him and Elena would have a conversation he'd just have to pop right up "Baby Gilbert might have some competition in the who's the true cock blocker skills category he murmurs to himself before walking over to his car, popping the trunk open and grabbing another bottle of bourbon from his secret stash.

Deciding he'd spend his night here outside rather than inside with those morons, not to mention he wanted space to grief over the relationship that never had the chance to begin. "No...no...no pity thoughts until this puppy is open" tapping the cap as he meanders his way over to the dock, taking a seat just like he had this afternoon.

Is that part of the sire bond, or just that I'm so happy to be here with you

His gaze shifting to staring straight ahead, uncapping the bottle he places the cap down onto the bench, a heavy sigh escapes his lips as he raises the bottle to his lips taking a deep swig. Setting the bottle down he raises his hand to his cheek, closing his eyes as he tries to recall her touch from this afternoon. Happy, she had admitted that she was happy with him and the way she had been looking, gazing at him today he could see the tenderness reflecting in her eyes, the unspoken words conveying through her dark orbs, if he had been selfish he would have gotten lost in that moment, but then he reminded himself that it wasn't real, the words, the looks, the touches and the feelings they weren't real.

This was the right thing to do, he kept repeating it to himself over and over in hopes that it would sound convincing but each time it came out miserable then the last. Things would return to normal, Elena would fall back into Stefan's arms, back into the right choice because like she had painfully stated time and time again it's always going to be Stefan. Just the thought of seeing them together, just the thought of seeing her look at Stefan the way she had looked at him moments ago was enough to cause the Vampire to desperately reach for the bottle latching it to his lips as he drowned the liquid down. He had expected to feel that satisfying string down his throat as the alcohol slid it's way down, but instead he felt the stinging pain in his heart. Ripping the bottle away from his lips he releases an agitated growl before launching the bottle skyward watching as it lands into the lake along with his dreams of happiness.

Wetness encases on his cheeks as he harshly uses the sleeve of his jacket wiping it away, but a few seconds later he finds himself repeating the action great just great now it's raining so I'll have to go inside with those idiots and make meaningless most likely non pleasant small talk he irritatingly thinks to himself rising off the bench. Baby blues flick up towards the sky expecting to fell more heavy raindrops, his brow furrowing in confusion until it takes him a few moments to realize he's crying. Damon Bad Ass I'll Snap Your Neck in Less Than Five Seconds Flat is crying, shaking his head he lets out a bitter laugh "oh and now I've surprised myself I didn't think I could get anymore pathetic...but this...this takes the cake" he shouts out as if he's talking to the universe, and he's pretty sure Creepy McShadester and Baby Gilbert can hear him, but at the moment he finds himself not giving two shits "go ahead laugh it up...laugh at the Big Bad Ass Vampire crying his eyes out...because he didn't get the girl...because he got a fleeting chance of happiness and it was ripped away...laugh at the fact that I'm going to have to stomach seeing the epicness of Elena and Stefan yet again" growling in annoyance at his weakness "I didn't get the girl Ric" he whispers wondering if heaven and hell really do exist does that mean you're watching me break down he thinks to himself before releasing a defeated sigh.

Silence drapes around him for a few moments before a weak smile slowly shows itself "if this is punishment for my past sins then I get it no matter what I do or who I try to be I'm always going to be destined to watch from the sidelines...I had to when I was human when Katherine was with Stefan it seems only fitting I fall back onto the sidelines again watching my brother find happiness with Elena...this is my punishment for being the bad guy seeing the woman I" swallowing hard "love...love my brother...well played." Violently blinking away the new tears he feels starting to well in his eyes I better go back inside...that'll keep me in check he tells himself wanting this weakness crap to get the hell away from him as he turns on his heels and retreats back towards the direction of the cabin with a heavy, but more importantly broken heart