Some Things Are Stronger than Blood

A/N: Heya! I'm back! And, I am changing my pen name. Instead of Texas Aes Sedai, it is going to be Texas Warrior. Thought that would be helpful. LOL.

Oh yeah, I don't own the Black Jewels, blah blah blah. Have fun!

TAS(For the last time. :D)

Surreal woke with a start, her heart pounding, eyes wet. Mother Night. She glanced to the right and was relieved to find the man who had been her husband for 35 years was still sound asleep. She pulled her knees up and rested her head on them. It had been years since she had been chased by that dream and she didn't know why it was back. She didn't need to be asleep to know what would happen next in her dreams, it had happened to her in real life and she knew her dreams wouldn't relent until she had relived the whole painful, wonderous thing. She took a shuddering breath and released it slowly.

"Why now?" she whispered into the darkness. At the foot of the bed, in the nest of blankets he had made, Graysfang lifted his head, alarmed at the panic he scented.

What? What is wrong? he demanded. Surreal shook her head.

"Nothing," she snapped. "It was just a dream."

A dream, or the dream?

"It's just a dream," she insisted. He eyed her for a moment before resting his head on his paws.

If you say so. Go back to sleep.

"If I do, the dream will still come."

It's always best to face your fears. He closed his eyes, clearly ending the conversation. Surreal watched him, feeling a slight sense of abandonment. After a while, she slowly closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep.

Surreal paced the kitchen, glancing at the clock every ten seconds or so. He should have been here by now, shouldn't he? Didn't she tell him five? Or was it six? Oh, what the hell was she going the tell him?

She jumped when someone knocked on the door. Gathering her courage, she opened the door and let the man in.

He was taller than her by a few inches. His shoulder length hair was the silver blonde of the Dea al Mon and his eyes were a deep blue green, overlarge like the rest of his kind. He kisses her softly.

"Hey. What did you need to talk to me about?" he asked, nibbling her ear. She placed her hands on his chest, hoping to make him stop but he ignored her. She took a deep breathe before telling him her secret.

"I...I have a problem, Gavin. I...I'm pregnant."

He pulled back, alarm showing in his eyes.

"What?!"

"I'm pregnant, Gavin. I'm going to have your baby."

"No, you're not," he growled, pushing her away. "You're going to get rid of it, abort it."

"I'm not going to destroy an innocent life, Gavin!!" she declared, fisting her hands.

"You had no problem destroying lives in your former life," he sneered, taking a snipe at her former profession. "You are not going to have my baby."

"This is your child," she repeated, moving to get a table between them. "You don't care?"

"You bitch. You know what a child will do to my career! How could you be so stupid?!" he shouted.

"Don't talk to me like that, it isn't my fault! I told you it was my fertile time, I asked you to be sure you were using a contraceptive, but you didn't listen!"

"Well, it is your problem now. I don't want to see you again!"

"Gavin! Gavin, wait!"

SLAM!

Surreal stared at the door, not really believing he had walked out. She felt for a chair and sank into it. For hours, she sat there, staring at nothing. Suddenly, Graysfang was at her side, whining and shoving his nose under her hand.

What is wrong? he demanded.

"He didn't want us," she answered dully. When she had chosen Gavin as her lover, she knew in her head someday he would leave, or that she would. She just wasn't made to have a permanent relationship with a male, not a relationship that was built on sex. But her heart had different ideas. There was a hole where her heart had been, a raw ache that threatened to consume her. Just like with Falonar. Nothing, not even Titian's death, had prepared her for this kind of heart pain. She felt a pang of cynical humor. It seemed like the only male she could have a steady relationship with that wasn't familial or sexual was a man who didn't even look to the opposite sex for pleasure. Speaking of Rainier, he would be pissed that she was pregnant. Mother Night.

What do you mean, us? Graysfang demanded.

"I am pregnant, Graysfang. And he doesn't want us."

If he doesn't want a puppy with you, he doesn't deserve you, he said sternly.

Surreal gave him a shaky smile.

"I am going to Terreille for a while," she said, standing and starting to gather various personal items from around the room. Graysfang looked at her in alarm.

What? Why?

"I have friends who will give me a place to stay for as long as I need it."

Very well. When do we leave?

Surreal hesitated before letting out a slow breath.

"In the morning."

Deje welcomed Surreal back with open arms.

"Has something happened?" she asked as she herded Surreal into her office and into a comfortable chair. "Did you decide to come back to the Red Moon houses?"

"No, Deje," Surreal said, giving her a shaky smile. "I'm afraid I couldn't return right now, even if I wanted to, which I don't."

Deje gave her a curious look. "What do you mean? The men here in Terreille still remember you."

"I don't care. I gave it up and there is nothing you could do to convince me to change my mind. I am no man's whore anymore."

"Very well. How long do you think you will stay?"

"At least eight months, maybe a bit longer." She fell silent, listening to a mental message from Graysfang. "Would you mind if a rather large…dog stayed with me?"

"Dog?" Deje frowned. "You have a dog?"

"Well, he isn't exactly a dog…he is kindred. A kindred wolf."

"Wolf?!" Deje stuttered. Surreal gave her a sheepish grin. "Why would you get a wolf for a pet?"

"I didn't choose him," Surreal grumbled, crossing her arms and throwing a cross look out the door. "More like he took a shine to me, curled up on my bed one night and never left."

Deje blinked. "You said he was kindred. Does he…wear Jewels?"

"Yes," Surreal smiled. "He is a Warlord who wears the Sapphire."

"A Warlord?" Deje squeaked, her face paling. "He won't…is he house trained?"

Surreal smiled, thinking back to when Aaron had told her question to that regard. "As one of my friends told me, he is house trained enough not to pee on the carpets. But then again, so are any male of any caste."

Deje swallowed and closed her eyes. "I…I think I should meet your…wolf friend before I make any decisions. I…I don't want him scaring the girls and driving away our patrons."

Surreal gave her a feral smile. "Graysfang won't drive anyone away unless he thinks someone, mostly me, is going to get hurt, or if I tell him to."

"Graysfang?"

"Yes. He is Gray's Fang." Surreal watched the recognition flash in her old friend's eyes and her smile widened. "He has proven to be a better protector than any man ever could."

Deje nodded, her eyes dropping to the Gray Jewel around Surreal's neck. "Would you call him in?"

"Of course." Graysfang, you can come in now.

Finally.

A moment later, the wolf was standing next to Surreal, looking up at her for instructions. Deje squeaked, started by his sudden appearance. At the noise, Graysfang turned his head to look at her. He whined at looked up at Surreal.

"He wants you to talk to him," she told the older woman gently. Deje looked around widely.

"How?"

"I'll show you."

Gently, she reached out for Deje's mind and once she made connection, she reached for Graysfang's. She felt Deje start when Graysfang entered the connection.

You did it! Graysfang rejoiced, wagging his tail. Deje looked like she had been poleaxed.

You are…Lord Graysfang? she said hesitantly.

Yes! Are you going to help us raise the puppy?

Surreal sucked in her breath and glared at the wolf.

Graysfang! she snarled. Deje turned her attention to Surreal.

"Puppy?" she asked, frowning. Surreal sighed.

"He means baby. Most kindred still use their own terms for our words," she said uneasily, sensing the discussion that was about to start.

"Baby? What baby? Are you…are you pregnant Surreal?" she exclaimed. Surreal nodded once. Deje gasped. "I thought…I thought you didn't want children."

"I don't. Didn't. I thought…I didn't mean to get pregnant. I don't want to be pregnant!"

Deje nodded sympathetically. "I see. Who was he?"

"Someone I knew I would leave, but who I was determined to enjoy the time we had. He is a Prince, an artist, a very good one. He was just starting out in his career and a baby would have made things…difficult for him. For the sake of all interested, I…left."

She lies!! Graysfang said, wriggling in delight. Deje glanced from the wolf to Surreal. She shot a glare at the wolf, who gave her a wolfy smirk. Oh, how she wanted to strangle him.

"You are so going to be a muff fur," she muttered, a familiar, though seldom used, insult and threat from Surreal to Graysfang. He, the bastard, merely sent her back loving thoughts. Damn him.

Deje eyed Surreal, nodding in understanding. "I see. Well, don't worry. If you won't work, that isn't a problem. You are more than welcome to stay here, Surreal, you and Graysfang."

"Thanks Deje. You're the best."

"I know."

Surreal gazed at herself in the mirror, a faint sense of horror gripping her as she ran her hands over her slightly swollen belly. She still wasn't sure if she wanted this child. She knew that she would get no help, financial or otherwise, from Gavin. Not that she needed financial help. Her male relatives had made sure of that.

No, the problems weren't monetary.

Surreal wasn't sure she was ready to be a mother. She had no idea how to care for a child, had never bothered to get to know many children. She herself hadn't had much of a childhood, she had started whoring to survive at the age of twelve. And in two months, she was going to be a mother. Not that it showed much. Surreal had seen pregnant women who didn't really show for most of the pregnancy and she was relived that she was one of those people. A giant belly wouldn't have helped her temper any.

Knock, knock. "Surreal!"

Delighted barking at the door alerted her to Graysfang approved of her visitor. Cautiously, Surreal let down the physic shield and lock Graysfang had put up for Surreal's sanity and her paranoia about locks.

Prince Rainier! Graysfang cried, diving through the door. Surreal stepped back from the door, contemplating her choices. The locks were Sapphire, they could keep Rainier out. But then again, Graysfang had put up the shields. He could just as easily take them down. She sighed and opened the door.

Rainier looked at her, his green eyes full of worry.

"Are you alright?" he demanded. She felt her eyes fill with tears and cursed her weepy emotions. His eyes narrowed and he caught her arm and dragged her inside, slamming the door as soon as Graysfang was through. He picked her up and carried her to a chair, ignoring her protests that she could walk. When he placed her in the chair, she looked up at him mutinously.

"Why?" he demanded. "Why didn't you tell anyone where you went?"

"I didn't think anyone would care where I went," she muttered. He raised an eyebrow. She folded her arms and stared back at him. He looked away first.

"I am sorry I didn't tell anyone where I went, but that doesn't give you any right to come barging in here and disrupting my life."

"I have every right as a male you accepted," he retorted. Behind them, Graysfang whined. "And you will get used to it, because I am going to be staying with you for now, until you return to Kaeleer."

"Who said I was going to return?" she demanded. He pulled a sealed envelope out of his jacket and handed it to her. After a moment, she took it and studied the seal. Damn it. Muttering about males who didn't know how to keep their noses out of her business, she slit the seal and opened the letter. Rainier, satisfied that she would stay still for a few minutes, looked around and found the small kitchenette in the little cottage. Deje had built it several years ago for the women who needed to get away for a while and had given Surreal the use of it for as long as she needed.

Ignoring the sounds of food preparation, Surreal read the letter, her annoyance growing as she read.

Surreal,

Jaenelle found you in Terreille. She also said that something was wrong and asked that someone be sent to stay with you. Rainier volunteered. Please treat him well and don't try to shave him. He just wants to help.

Everyone here sends their love and hopes you will return soon. Chaosti has several words for you when you come home.

Take care little witch.

Daemon

Idly, Surreal wondered if she would be able to just throw Rainier out. Then the smells coming from the kitchen distracted her. Curious, she stood up and walked into the kitchen, rubbing the small of her back. Damn it, she wasn't built for having children!!

Rainier looked up when she entered the kitchen, a small smile on his face. He motioned to the bubbling water and simmering, creamy looking soup.

"I figured you would be more receptive to me if I fed you," he said with a grin. She nodded and took a seat at the table. He slid into the chair opposite hers. "Am I allowed to comment on your pregnancy?" he asked. She snarled. "I guess not."

"Why are you here, Rainier? I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself. And Graysfang is more than able to do any craft that needs doing."

He smiled and leaned back in his chair, eying her. She shifted, uncomfortable with his scrutiny.

"I am here," he said slowly, "because Prince Sadi said he wanted someone to make sure you were alright and I figured you would be more receptive of me than Lucivar or Chaosti, since I have no family ties to you and I…I am not interested in being your bedmate."

"No one is interested in being my bedmate right now," she snapped. "Anyway, this cottage only has one bed and…"

"Surreal," he said quietly, reaching across the table to take her hands in his. She avoided looking at him. "You aren't going to get rid of me that easily."

"I…"

The front door opened and Surreal heard Deje's cheerful greeting to Graysfang. Hell's fire. She had forgotten Deje was coming to spend the evening with her. Deje took a step into the kitchen and froze.

"I am sorry Surreal," she said quickly. "I didn't realize you had a visitor. I…"

Rainier stood and offered her his hand, a warm smile lighting up his handsome features. Surreal felt a stab of jealousy as he kissed Deje's hand.

"I am Rainier," he said. "I am going to be staying with Surreal for a while."

"I…are you the child's father?" Deje demanded, her eyes narrowing.

Surreal's "no" was silenced by Rainier's quiet, "yes, I am." She struggled to hide her amazement at his immediate answer. Deje raised her eyebrow and looked at Surreal, who kept her head down.

"I see." She turned and left the kitchen. With a glare at Rainier, Surreal hurried after her.

"Deje…"

"I thought you said you left him because he didn't want you or the baby," Deje hissed, stopping before the door. "It is obvious that he does want you, Surreal, very much. Whatever happened, you didn't tell me the truth. Why?"

"I…I was trying to figure things out," she said softly, hanging her head. Mother Night, why was she feeling guilty? "I am sorry, Deje. I…"

"I have only one thing to say to you," Deje said just as softly. "Get back into that kitchen and show him that you feel the same way for him that he obviously feels for you. That will go a long way towards fixing anything between the two of you. Graysfang can stay with me tonight."

"DEJE!!"

The older witch gave her a wicked grin before calling Graysfang and disappearing. The wolf gave her a satisfied look and followed Deje. Surreal stood rooted to the ground, stunned. She stiffened when Rainier laid a hand on her shoulder.

"Are you okay?"

"NO I AM NOT!!" she shouted and pulled away from him. "What the hell did you think you were doing, telling her you were my baby's father? I could…"

"I was giving you a reasonable excuse for why I was there," he said calmly. "Your friend doesn't seem like the kind to let men stay in her house without a sufficient reason. And Surreal, I can see how much this whole thing is upsetting you. Why…"

"I don't want it! I don't want this baby, this whole mess! And I don't want you here! I…I want my mother!" She collapsed into sobs and didn't resist when Rainier put his arms around her and held her. He was fighting the primitive instinct to kill to protect his Lady.

Surreal didn't know it, but she had long ago replaced Jaenelle as the one he looked to for comfort. She had comforted him several times when he was in rut, given him jobs around her home that needed doing, things she usually did herself or, on the occasions that she was unable to do them, had Lucivar do. He loved her as much as he could and he doubted she would ever know it. He had answered Deje's question like he had because he loved Surreal and wanted to protect her. He would claim the child was his and fight anyone who questioned him, because he loved her.

Rainier waited until Surreal had calmed down before leading her down the small hallway to the bedroom. He smiled when she willingly sank into the chair he steered her to and closed her eyes. He hesitated over what to do next. He didn't have much experience with pregnant women and she didn't look like she wanted to move any time soon. The smell of burning soup drew him back to the kitchen.

After a while, he returned to the bedroom to find Surreal had fallen asleep, one hand resting on her belly. He set down the tray of soup, crackers and the fruit he had been delighted to find and studied her. He had his suspicions over who her child's father really was, that bastard she had been bedding, Gavin.

He felt himself rising to the killing edge, red filled his vision at the thought of the Dea al Mon Prince. The day after Surreal had disappeared he had been seen with a young Glacian actress at a party in Amdarh.

After several minutes, he got himself under control and gently woke Surreal up, stepping away just in time to avoid her flailing arms.

"Surreal, Surreal, it's just me! Wake up!"

She opened her eyes and growled at him.

"Never wake up a pregnant lady," she snarled. He backed away and watched her warily. When she calmed down, he carefully picked up the tray and offered it to her. After a moment, she took it and devoured the food. She growled when he took his bowl but didn't stop him. He kept well away from her, careful to let her eat as much as she wanted before taking anything else.

When she sat back, content, he saw the sleepy look in her eyes, vanished the food and offered her a hand. She eyed him before taking his hand and standing up, rubbing her back and muttering under her breathe. She shooed him out of the room and slammed the door shut, turning the lock. Once she was alone, she hurriedly dressed in her nightclothes and climbed into bed. She was so tired. All the emotions of the past hour had exhausted her. She closed her eyes and didn't notice the door opening as she fell asleep.

Rainier watched her silently as she fell asleep. He had noticed that she didn't show nearly as much as he had expected. Maybe she wasn't as far along as he had been told? No, she had disappeared six months ago. She must be at least seven months pregnant. Interesting.

He vanished his boots and shrugged out of his jacket. Carefully, so she didn't wake, he slipped into bed next to her and draped his arm around her, inching her closer to him. She muttered something and snuggled close to his chest, using his arm as a pillow. He smiled and closed his eyes as well, drifting into a deep, dreamless sleep.

Warmth.

That was the first thing Surreal registered when she woke up. A delicious warmth that she was snuggled up to, not like anything Graysfang had ever produced. Then she realized an arm was wrapped around her waist and she was using another, well muscled arm, as a pillow. Slowly, she lifted her head to see Rainier's sleeping face resting on the pillow. Confusion filled her then the events of the previous evening came back. She frowned. She should be angry that he had barged into her home, lied to Deje and now had the audacity to be sleeping in her bed. Somehow, she couldn't summon the willpower to do so.

Moving her hand a bit, she jabbed him in the ribs. He woke up with a start and looked around wildly. When he got his bearings, he gave her a hesitant smile.

"Good morning," he said quietly. She smiled back, a quiet smile that made him shiver with delight.

"You are in my bed," she stated matter of factly.

"As you pointed out last night, there is only one bed in this house."

"I should be angry with you."

Hope stirred in his heart. "Are you?"

"No. You are a much better heater than Graysfang. I think I will keep you." Her smile was one that he had never seen, quiet, gentle, loving. It gave him a glimpse at the child she had been, of the woman she might have been if her mother hadn't been murdered.

Slowly, he let his hand drift until it rested on her womb.

"I am sorry if I upset you yesterday, with the whole father thing," he said. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's okay," she whispered. Tears stung her eyes and she buried her face in his chest to hide them. "I wish…"

"…that your mother was here?" he guessed.

"That and, I want my baby to have a life different from mine. I know I can give him or her that now, but I want them to have more than just uncles who smother them trying to make up for a father who doesn't care or even know them."

Rainier felt his heart constrict at her confession. He made a spilt second decision.

"Let me be your child's father," he said softly. Surreal looked up at him with wide eyes.

"What?"

"Surreal, I love you as much as it is possible for me to love a woman. I…Lady Angelline used to be the one I turned to, just as the rest of us Warlord Princes did, for comfort and stability. But, for years now, it has been you I came to. Couldn't you tell when I came to you for comfort during the rut? All the times I made myself a nuisance during your moontimes? Did you think I was just trying to make you feel…wanted?"

She was silent for several minutes, gazing up at him in astonishment. Finally, she took a deep breathe and let it out slowly.

"I…I knew you cared for me, but I thought it was as a brother, a friend. Not…not love."

"I know I am not the…best choice, given who, or what I am, but I had hoped…I am willing to be the father that you desire for your baby. I want to, Surreal. Will you accept my offer?"

Again, she was silent, mulling over his words. Did she really want this? If Rainier claimed her child, she was also giving him permission to take care of her, to meddle in her affairs even more than he already did. Did she want that?

Looking at him, she realized that he was the one she had been searching for, the man who could love her no matter what her past and accept her as an equal. Yes, he preferred to warm a male's bed, but than again, what did that matter? She didn't have to take him as her lover. What would she decide?

"Rainier, I thank you for your offer. I am sure my baby would be proud to have you as its father."