Just Like Her
WANT SOME SUGAR?
… was written underneath his feet in what seemed to be red paint. Of course, considering the history of both Destroy Stadium and his oh-so-honorable profession, Travis was willing to bet that the vibrant splatterings along with the words underneath his feet was composed of a different substance entirely.
"Fucking disgusting shit," He muttered underneath his breath, seeing that he was the only one in the carved concrete hallway underneath the pitcher's mound. About thirty feet separated him from a dull-looking brown door, although he suspected that the door was an entirely different color when the stadium was first built. The Shine in his left pocket rang; Travis put away the beam katana in favor of the slide phone, prepared for Sylvia's usual playful (if sometimes disturbing) banter. However, something about her seemed different; she sounded distant, cold. A far cry from the usual seductress he'd been lusting after for the past few weeks.
'Probably just PMSing. Women.' He thought as he listened to her prep talk for his tenth match so far. Deep in his mind he knew it was something different; however, he wasn't one to question his employer.
"…When you are ready, head inside. Good luck, Travis. Trust your Force. Head for the Garden of Madness."
Click. Gone.
Travis looked to the door, turning it's rusted knob to reveal what appeared to be a… batting cage? Sure enough, green Astroturf stretched out in front of the makeshift plate he stepped out on. Twenty feet in front of him stood a woman, slender build garbed in a small pink dress complete with tutu-like bottom, corset tied with an overly large bow. Her long legs were covered almost completely by white leggings that were torn at the knees and pink ribbons which led down to pink stiletto heels. Travis couldn't see the woman's face; she was gripping a bloodstained bat, readying herself for what Travis presumed was a ball. However, he got much more than he was expecting; a gaunt man, tied at the wrists on his knees and dressed completely in S&M gear came careening down the conveyor belt towards her.
'The fuck…?' Travis thought, perplexed as the woman started to speak.
"Hoooooome RUN!" She shouted, the bat colliding with his face. Travis's eyes widened as he fell into a dark hole in front of the conveyor belt, slumped over as he disappeared into the ground. Two more came after the man; both went out in the same manner, the woman laughing with glee. Clearly she wasn't going to do anything, so Travis took it upon himself to introduce his presence to the peanut gallery.
"This is insane!" He shouted, striding out onto the turf. The girl shut off the mechanism, leaving a thin man to rest at the end of the belt. She swung her bat at her side as she made her way to a small red fridge.
"Phew! What a day. I need a drink." She still hadn't met eyes with him. "So fucking thirsty... hold on a 'sec." The bat went on the small coffee table so she could open the fridge with a gloved hand. Inside were numerous cans of something called CHILLER 7. She grabbed one hastily, opening the can and chugging it down as if there were no tomorrow. Travis raised a brow, confused at this woman's behavior; the can left her mouth as she let out a burp. "Damn, that's smooth." She threw the can aimlessly, not batting an eye as it landed on her subordinate's head. Travis did his best to keep his expression blank, although something seemed vaguely familiar about this woman. "I feel alive again." Hand on her hip, bent legs accented by her outfit as they met eyes for the first time. "Wanna drink?" She slurred, smirking over at Travis.
'… Sylvia?' Travis thought, narrowing his eyes and keeping her gaze. "… I'll pass." He said, choosing to stand on the other side of the coffee table as the woman made her way to a faded pink hued loveseat. She chose to speak, going on a different tangent as she plopped down on the furniture, legs open and back slouched over her thighs.
'Damn… they really do look… but no, this girl can't be Sylvia… too raunchy.' Travis said, blinking away his thoughts as the woman began her so-called monologue.
"Why am I such an angry bitch? Seriously, no matter how many I kill, it's all the same- they're all going to pay. Yeah- with their fucking lives." She said, tone seeming like she was trying to reassure herself rather than the man in front of her as one hand clenched around her beer and another into the air in front of her. Travis smirked- yes, this woman had fire where she lacked in class. But this was Santa Destroy- class was little more than a myth.
"You're a bad girl," He said smoothly, hands in his pockets as his head tilted slightly. This seemed to aggravate the woman; she glared up at him, voice suddenly snapping.
"You have no right to look at me like that! It's just a job… the daily grind." She growled, letting out her frustration on the can in her right hand as she threw it across the room. Travis gathered his courage, stepping forward.
"You're no assassin- you're just a perverted killing maniac!" He protested, voice still and steady even as the woman steadily lost her composure.
"In essence, they're the same." She said haughtily, still keeping with Travis's gaze. "Don't go on thinking you're better than me! You think you're hot shit- who the fuck do you think you are?!"
She grabbed her bat, brandishing it at Travis. The look in her eyes was almost maniacal, insane; identical to the expression on the woman who stole all he called his own.
'Jeane-' Travis began mentally, but was cut short by her bat a foot from his face.
"Come on!" Bad Girl challenged, kicking aside the table as Travis ducked away, getting out Tsubaki. Travis grit his teeth as Bad Girl skipped towards him, swinging her bat almost happily. "Batter… UP!" She yelled, forcing the bat into the ground where he was not two seconds previous. Before Travis could land any hits in, she backed away, holding the bat in her hand idly once more as she stared at him.
"What's wrong? Scared to get hit?" She taunted, practically prancing to a tempo unknown to Travis. Instantly she launched into a flurry of swings, vocalizing her efforts. Travis blocked most of her hits, feeling the recoil from his katana as the weapons clashed; he pushed forwards, overpowering the smaller woman. As she gained her composure, Travis then picked her up over his shoulder, doing a backbend and forcing her into the ground. He backed away as she got up.
"Asshole," She muttered, staggering to her feet. Travis moved in to get a few hits on her; of course, Bad Girl countered almost effortlessly, giggling as her strike sent Travis sprawling on the floor. As he struggled to his feet, Bad Girl switched the batting mechanism on, smirking as a man came down the conveyor belt. She positioned, aiming for her wounded opponent.
"What… the…" Travis muttered, shaking his head.
"Hoooooome RUN!" She yelled, hitting the scrawny man towards Travis. The assassin quickly dodged, hearing a sickening crunch behind him; seemed like it was too much for the man being hit. He readied his katana, eye on the next 'ball.'
"Come on, bitch!" Travis yelled, readying himself. Bad Girl laughed, hitting another one towards him with everything she had. This time, however, Travis swung home, sending the man straight to his assailant. Bad Girl was hit; she fell to the floor soon afterwards, hand to her face. Travis edged closer to her, katana at the ready- was that crying he heard from her?
'No. She's tricking me.' He thought methodically, watching her sob into her gloves. Sure enough, one hand was on her bat, and a few seconds later she glared up at him, just out of reach.
"Fuck." She muttered acidly, getting up and jumping up above Travis, grinning. "Go to hell!" She screamed, lowering her bat as she touched down to create a large shockwave. Travis dodged hastily, but was still sent on his back as she hit him in the torso. After doing a slight pirouette, she pulled out a small canteen.
"You wouldn't." Travis muttered, astounded. Bad Girl simply chugged the liquid, spraying the last mouthful onto her bat. From her corset she pulled out a lighter; with a slight spark, her weapon was crowned with flames. She laughed, swinging towards Travis at full force; Travis's eyes widened as he narrowly dodged her onslaught.
"This bitch is fucking insane!" He thought aloud, eyes wide as he took the brunt of her next barrage.
"Say that again, you bastard!" She yelled, swinging for his sword arm. Travis ducked, feeling the bat singe his hair slightly. She left herself wide open after the fullbodied swing; Travis took his chance, sending Tsubaki into the girl's stomach. A scream of pain emerged from her lips as she stood, frozen, impaled on his katana. Her mouth formed into a soft O of surprise as crimson blood sprayed in both directions from her wound.
"Naughty girls need spankings!" Travis said, keeping his grip tight. Bad Girl leered over at him as her bat came swinging towards him, unfazed.
"Maybe you forgot- I'm a bad girl!" She shouted, hitting him over the head with her weapon, still standing with the sword through her gut. She kneeled over Travis, proceeding to beat his body with her bat. He let out grunts of pain with each hit; there was no escaping her snare. Yet Travis could see that his opponent was fading fast; the katana was still in her, taking everything she could offer.
'So… persistent… just like…'
"I won't lose! I won't lose! … I will never… lose!" She screamed, breathing haphazardly. Travis saw no point in letting this continue; he raised his arms above his head.
"I give up, you win!" He grunted, afraid for the next swing. Bad Girl's torso dropped so they were face to face, she over him; take a few inches and the sword through her gut and it would have been an entirely different situation.
"Yes! … I won…" The blonde giggled, smiling down at Travis before going limp on top of him. Her breathing stopped; Travis had won. He lay beneath her for a few moments, eyes wide.
'Just like me…'
Footsteps; two men, both with cleaning supplies. They pulled Travis out from beneath Bad Girl's corpse, one scrubbing his body free of blood while the other addressed him in a formal manner.
"On behalf of Sylvia Christel, I am here to tell you that you are officially ranked second." The man said, face obscured in shadow. Travis nodded, exhausted both physically and mentally.
"… Thanks. That was a close one. Almost… didn't make it…" Travis said breathlessly, barely able to stand. The man nodded in agreement.
"It was a fine fight, sir." He said tonelessly. Travis went to his knees.
"Shit, that was close," He muttered, falling to the ground and blacking out.
'She was… just like me…'
Authoress notes! Yay.
I tried to do this fight justice, but you're the judge of that. This has always been my favorite fight out of all of the assassin fights, I even wrote this while listening to Pleather For Breakfast. Ha. Anyway.
Please review! It would make my day. :D You'll be seeing more from me here.
Disclaimer: No More Heroes belongs to whoever, blah blah blah. You know it. Oh, credit goes to Blitzmage on YouTube for uploading the fight; couldn't have written this without that reference. Much thanks for reading.