Disclaimer – Yeah You don't really need me to tell you that I'm not J.K. Rowling, because if I was then I'm completely sure I wouldn't be doing fanfics and I wouldn't be broke. So again all acknowledgments goes to the all-mighty J.K. Rowling!

This is a re-haul of an old story I wrote a few years ago. It's very random, and very funny. Weirdness will ensue soo you have been warned

~ This pretty much ignores a lot that happened in book 6 and 7 as it is basically a random spoof of the Harry Potter Universe ~

Weird Days at HOGWARTS SCHOOL of WITCHCRAFT and WIZARDRY

Chapter I

Of Candy And Alcohol

For once in Harry's life he was certainly not counting on anything to go wrong.

It was his first day back at Hogwarts, and he was planning on starting his 7th and final year there with his two best friends Ron and Hermione on a good note.

Harry had his mind made up, he was absolutely going to have a having a normal year... well as normal as possible that is, considering he had a murderous raving lunatic after him that had been trying to kill him since he was like one.

BUT no his fate had other plans for him this year!

Harry had awaken particularly early on his first official day back in the castle. He made his way drowsily over to his trunk and grabbed some clean clothes, along with his dress robes and made his way sluggishly to the shower.

By the time Harry had left the bath the rest of the boys were up and stammering around blindly in the dormitory, looking for clothes and anything else.

Harry slowly walked over to his bed and sat down looking out his window at the blue sky, and green lands surrounding the castle, yes he was definitely back home.

Ron came stumbling over to his bed and sat down, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and yawning wildly.

"Their planning on having a little beginning of the year party in the common room later tonight to honor our last year here at dear old Hogy Hogy Hogwarts!"

Ron yawning again as he stood up from Harry's bed.

"Oi almost forgot, Fred and George are sending some of their products today to sort of eer test them out, so be warned!"

Ron finished talking to harry, before walking over to his own bed and laying out across it trying to get get a few more minutes of sleep

Harry, Ron, and what seemed like everyone else in 7th year Gryffindor sulked through the entire day of their classes. Everyone was waiting impatiently for the party later that night.

Well that is everyone but, Hermione. Unluckily for her though it did finally come.

The party that night was anything short of ordinary, or small as Ron had so graciously put it that morning for harry.

Fred and George had somehow mysteriously managed to send in 5 crates full of their latest products.

Including a few such as: Mountain Mothballs, Forget-Me-Not toffees, Crack smackers, and Dimension Shifters.

Nearly everyone in the entire common room had tried at least one of the products from the twins for fun. They were all so very tempting, and their reactions where usually very amusing, getting many laughs from the students.

Also, not to forget to mention nearly everyone in the room was completely smashed. Both Seamus and Dean managed to get their hands on 3 bottles of Fire Whiskey, and smuggled them into the the common room. The results were disastrous, but funny non - the – less.

Lavender had puked in Padma's hair, Neville was running around the fire place with no shirt on, the words, "I love my pet plant" written over his chest. While Ron had somehow been jinxed, as he had passed out hours ago, and was now sleeping on the sealing.

Hermione was the only one that refused to join into the festivities.

She had locked her self in the girls common room and did not come down once. (It was even said that if you got close enough to the girls common room, that you could hear her mumbling to herself and cursing the lot of them down at the party...)

Harry honestly had no idea what time he managed to crawl drunkenly back to the boys dormitory, but neither did anyone else, they were all far to plastered and screwed up on Fred and George's products to even care-

Harry himself had bravely been the only one to want to try the 'Dimensions Shifters''. He was highly disappointed though, as nothing had happened when he bit into the large, soft red candy earlier that night.

Little, however did he know that his world was about to be drooped of the Astronomy Tower then Pimp Smacked in the face.

What lay next to Harry's bed was one of the candy wrappers (close up) which read,

" WARNING do take while under the influence of alcohol, side affects may vary"

Doing the happy dance, "REVIEW...REIVEW...REVIEW"