Alfred sees Arthur under somnacin.
The dreamscape is wild and unpredictable in its irregularities—Alfred traverses it with the joy and expectation of a young boy, for he can be young in this little world of himself, made by him and dictated by him, and the colours of the sky can change according to his will.
A green-eyed man with a smile like icicles (infinity) and a tube connected to a silver briefcase. "We need you," he says, and Alfred responds.
("I love you," Alfred says, a good long while later, and the green-eyed man reacts with shock, horror, and a brief flash of anger.)
The place is sprawling, massive, beautiful, and Alfred can walk and walk and walk until he can't feel his legs, but the world will never end. There are Penrose steps everywhere he can see, and when he is tired he would climb them, to forever and beyond.
The sky fluctuates from green, pink, purple, all the colours of the rainbow—but when Alfred is tired it stays blue, with white clouds, and the sea-breeze is in the air.
(They kiss under the shadow of the Eiffel Tower, and the green-eyed man is wearing a beige-coloured scarf that Alfred can twist his hand in to tug him closer.)
But when he has walked for so long, and the horizon is barren and dry, Alfred lies down and closes his eyes, and just like that, buildings would sprout up like weeds around him, all stone and concrete and metal and glass. There are Penrose steps in each of them.
(The green-eyed man is smiling, and he draws Alfred close, and he leans in just enough for Alfred to see every strand of his eyelashes. "I love you," he says in return, and Alfred laughs happy and loud because it's been a long time in coming.)
(Prague. They meet there again. The green-eyed man has a coat and gloves on, and he slips the clasp on the silver briefcase and lifts the cover off. He turns and gives Alfred a tube.)
When you have gone on for so long, forgetting is just part of the process.
Alfred tells himself never to forget. And he doesn't think he has.
(Too deep—far too deep a dream, and it was a bullet that had got him in the chest, simple and effective, his fingers slipping in blood as he starts to fall into nothing. Everything is hazy as the green-eyed man shouts Alfred's name.)
Then one day. (A day or a night, Alfred wonders, because everything is the same here.)
There is someone on the beach before him, washed-up and making rough choking noises as he clambers onto shore. Alfred runs over and drags him up by his arms.
The man tosses and turns and spits out water. He looks at Alfred, and there is breaking emotion over his face, crumpling in relief and sorrow and worry. "Alfred, you," he says and clutches onto Alfred, holding tight, "I've finally found- you look older, I can't…" And he takes a gun out and presses it into Alfred's hands.
The man's eyes are green, wet with tears.
"We can walk into infinity," Alfred says wonderingly, but the green-eyed man shakes his head and looks to the gun.
"Come back," the man says, soft, pleading, and Alfred raises the gun, places his finger on the trigger and watches as the man's face turns horrified, scared.
"Alfred, please…"
"I," and Alfred's voice breaks, shatters, and there is nothing but the raw emotion in those green eyes, "I'm so sorry."
The green-eyed man growls, wrenches the gun from Alfred's grip and backs up quickly. "You can't stay here!" he hisses in frustration, pointing the gun straight at Alfred. "You'll be better when you get up top, please…"
Alfred smiles. "This is my topside," he says, calmly, and the man starts to shake his head, say something about no and impossibilities, but Alfred knows himself and he knows his world. He's been here so long, after all.
The green-eyed man shudders and brings the gun back down, arms hanging limply by his side.
"We can walk into infinity," Alfred repeats.
The man laughs, a hysterical sound, and nods his head. "Yes," he says, "we can," and he takes Alfred's hand and lets Alfred pull him forward, into their broken world with its changing skies and Penrose steps and the difference in their heartbeats.
Alfred could never forget Arthur, and now he doesn't have to—he has Arthur at his side.