For the record, I decided that this year, I would write stories for my two good friends for Christmas. Marcus (not his real name, but what I shall call him otherwise) wanted me to write a Glee story...but I don't watch Glee enough to even write a fanfic on it. I only listen to the music and not-so-obviously gawk at how totally awesome Darren Criss is (see what I did there?).
Harry Potter is the only fandom we both know, and even though he has never seen AVPM (which is an error that needs to be corrected btw!), I'm going through Pre-Very-Potter-Senior-Year-Depression by watching the previous two musicals, thus all the random references and jokes.
This story was mainly for comical purposes with a few inside jokes. Please don't take this story anymore seriously than it should.
Thank you and enjoy the nonsense!
Chessy and Marcus walked into the Great Hall, eyes staring at them. Chessy expected this type of reaction somewhat, having entered this new fandom, but she wasn't afraid to admit that it was totally awkward and uncomfortable to have them stare at her.
Marcus, however, thought nothing of it. He stood there dressed in his Gryffindor colors, a small smirk on his face.
"What?" Chessy asked him, having noticed the look.
"I'm fine," he said. "I just think this is pretty cool. I mean-." He pulls out a stick from his pocket. "I've got a wand!"
Chessy shoved his arm down, "Are you nuts?! Put that down!"
Marcus refused to move his arm, "I think you need I calm down."
She put her hands on her hips, "Did you even read the whole series?"
"No but, c'mon, what's gonna happen if I say 'Expelliarmus'?" Suddenly, a blast of light emerged from the tip of his wand and hit a kid squarely in the chest, knocking him over. He stood up and glared at Marcus.
"YOU!" His hair was a bleach-blonde color and in was dressed in Slytherin garb. Chessy recognized him immediately.
"Ugh," she groaned, "Malfoy." The Slytherin stormed towards the duo, his two lackeys, Crabbe and Goyle, following from behind.
"Well," Malfoy said, tauntingly, "It seems someone needs to work on their aim!"
"Nah," Marcus replied. "I just got used to this magic thing."
"Well, you won't be afraid to have a duel, then?"
Marcus pondered this for a moment, "Alright, you're on." Malfoy muttered something to Goyle and with a loud roar, the other students immediately fled as they stepped onto a table.
Chessy turned to him abruptly as the Slytherin team prepared to battle, "Marcus, I don't think this is such a good idea. You barely know any spells!"
"Don't worry, I got this!" He stepped onto the table, facing Draco Malfoy. He knew he didn't know any spells. But, hey, he thought, what's the worst that could happen? "Um... Accio Pizza!" A pizza box flew into the room and into his arms. The Slytherin boys laughed as Chessy facepalmed.
"What's a pizza gonna do for you?"
"Hey, I'm hungry. You can't blame a guy for being hungry." He walked towards them, "Want some?"
Goyle inched forward, "Goyle hungry! What kind?" He leaned his head down.
"You know, pepperoni, cheese and... Some punch!" The box flew open as Marcus's fist made contact with Goyle's nose. Goyle flew back into the other two, causing them to fall over like a set of dominos. Malfoy stood up.
"Am I bleeding?" Crabbe shook his head as Malfoy eyed Marcus angrily. "You'll pay for this! Crabbe! Goyle!" The two stood up and grabbed both Shawn and Chessy. "Shake them!"
Crabbe violently shook Chessy's shoulders. She tried screaming for help, but after a while, it was just too difficult. Her head was starting to pound when three other figures in Gryffindor clothes emerged.
"Let 'em go, Malfoy!"
"Well, if it isn't Potter trying to save his friends? Well you won't be able to help them this time!"
"Jelly Legs Jinx!" Crabbe suddenly fell to the ground as Chessy seized her opportunity. She pulled out her wand and pointed it at Goyle.
"Petrificus Totalus!" Goyle froze and fell onto the table. Chessy turned to finally identify their rescuers. The Golden Trio: Hermione Granger, the smart one; Ron Weasley, the always hungry one; and Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived.
Chessy eyed the package of Double-Stuff Oreos in Ron's arm, "Can I have some?"
Ron held it like a newborn child, "No! My Double-Stuff!" Chessy shurgged as the battle continued.
Harry stepped towards Malfoy, "Whatcha gonna do now without Crabbe and Goyle to do your dirty work?"
Malfoy quickly pulled out his wand and said the first spell he could think of, "Serpentsortia!" A snake emerged from the tip of his wand and was heading for Harry's face.
"Look out!" Marcus jumped at the snake and grabbed it. Before it had a chance to bite him, he slit its throat with a pocketknife in his hand. The others stared in shock as Chessy let out a sigh of relief.
"Suddenly, I am glad you have that knife collection!" Suddenly, the door burst open.
"What the devil is going on here!" Snape stood in the doorway, with Dumbledore following close behind.
"Malfoy! Get off the table, you little shit!" Malfoy reluctantly did so as Snape gave him the evil eye.
"I want to see you, all of you, in my office...Now!" The other two Slytherins were released from their jinxes and left the Great Hall.
Dumbledore approached Marcus and patted him on the back, "That was very impressive, young man. I wouldn't mind having a wizard like you at Hogwarts."
"But," Hermione began, "He didn't really cast any spells-."
"Granger, don't ruin the moment! Ten points from Gryffindor!"
The other Gryffindors groaned, "Thanks, Hermione."
"What about me, Professor?" Chessy asked.
"Meh..." Dumbledore began, "You were cute. Just less yelling next time, it gets annoying after a while!" He started walking away with Marcus as she chased after them.
"But... I actually know magic! I know spells! Sir! I'm a frickin' Hufflepuff!"
"What the hell is a Hufflepuff?" Marcus asked, a confused look on his face.
Dumbledore put an arm around him, "My boy, you and I are gonna get along just fine." They left, leaving Chessy alone with the Golden Trio. Silence hung in the air until...
"Butterbeers on me?" Harry asked.
Chessy beamed, "Race ya to Hogsmeade!" They all left the Great Hall to cause more disaster and hilarity.
Btw Yes, I've decided to bring Snape and Dumbledore back from the dead, 'cuz I'm an fanfictioner and I can do that! XD
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this story. Happy Holidays!
Hufflepuffs, RedVines and Ten Points to Dumbledore!
-CG13 AKA Chessy