-1Title: "Closer To Love" - a 12 Days of Clois ficlet
Author: Christy | brdwaybebe
Category: SR
Prompt: #19 "Closer To Love" by Matt Kearney
Rating: PG
Word Count: 2885
Summary: Untold moments from Superman Returns. Lois deals with the events of New Krypton as they unfold.
Spoilers: Superman Returns
Author's Notes: What's this? Special Thanks to Repmetsyrrah, Hyperion, & Vividly Pathetic for loaning me their eyeballs!

Closer To Love

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Both of their breathing was ragged. Hers from panic, his from pain.

Their eyes locked and for a moment his hand covered hers. Volumes were spoken in this one steady gaze. Where to begin?

The world was ending and there was nothing to be done. If Luthor had gotten close enough to stab a shard of Kryptonite into Superman's side, chances were he had a back up plan if the hero were to return.

Lois mind churned with all the things she wanted to say, but her voice seemed to be lost within the waves of chaos crashing through her mind.

It was he who was able to speak first, and of all the words he could have chosen, he'd asked how she'd found him.

She gaped at him a moment, impulses firing through her, all telling her to do different things; hold him, kiss him, slap him. And while she decided which one to follow, the leather of the passenger seat behind her squeaked and Jason leaned around the arm of the chair in answer to Superman's question.

His eyes strayed from hers unknowingly to those of their son. And Lois kept silent once again, watching in nervous apprehension for a spark of recognition between either father or son, in this their first interaction.

If such a spark occurred, no indication was given. Superman's hand slid from between her fingers, and he made the slow progression to his feet, a gentle 'Thank you.' tumbling from his lips.

Her mind was frantically trying to find a way to keep him from doing what they both knew he would. Don't leave us. Not again. You have a son.

Lois wondered if her mind screamed loud enough his sensitive ears would hear. She wanted so badly to give voice to the cries of her heart but with Richard and Jason in hearing distance, such declarations and entreaties would have to happen later.

If there was a later…

He stood a mere foot away from her, and yet Lois felt the distance between them yawning like the unending abyss she had pulled him from.

His eyes held hers, their sparkle replaced with a weary resigned sorrow. His usually perfect hair hung in dripping strands over his forehead.

He turned away only for a moment, to fling wide the side hatch of Richard's small plane, with his back turned almost completely, she saw him try and fail to conceal a wince of pain.

"What are you doing?" she cried incredulously finally finding her words.

He turned around, his eyes holding moisture that couldn't be explained by the spray of the sea. "I have to go back." He murmured his voice all too telling of the strength he was lacking.

He couldn't possibly. He'll never survive. Her mind clamored. Everything in her being prompted her to declare her love in the hope it would keep him there. But her lips only managed; "You're hurt!" but her eyed broadcasted another message; I love you.

He did not reply. The cerulean of his eyes glinted in understanding and sad smile lifted the corner of his mouth. He took a step backward and with eyes full of unspoken reply he spoke his final words to her. "Goodbye, Lois."

And then he was gone.

Lois threw herself forward, her body moving toward him as a reflex. Her eyes followed him into the sky, knowing that if she spoke again, he would hear her. But her heart was only just healing from losing him once. If she whispered her feelings now and he didn't come back…

His soaring form grew smaller and smaller as the distance grew. Finally, the clouds seemed to open slightly, as if folding him into their embrace, when only a moment ago he'd been in hers. The sun hid its face, withholding its light and warmth from the doomed landscape. Lois' fingers curled around the door handle and numbly pulled the hatch closed.

----------

Lois sat motionless at her desk. Her hair hung in damp strands that clung to the sides of her face. She stared blankly at the bustle of the bullpen, her eyes viewing nothing but a face they may never see again.

Jimmy silently materialized beside her with a bag of frozen peas. He extended them gently, "Here you go, Lois" he said, softer than she'd ever heard him.

Lois pressed the cold plastic to the painful lump on her forehead. She winced at the extreme change in temperature. Richard of course had wanted her to go to the hospital, certain she had a concussion. That was probably true, but she couldn't waste time being poked by doctors when he was still out there.

Suddenly, the room exploded with activity.

"Turn on the monitors!" Gil yelled across the room, sending Jimmy into motion to a small metal canister filled with remote controls. One after another, the television screens that hadn't been destroyed in the earthquake began to spark to life. Each was tuned to a different channel but all showcased various angles of the same image.

An impossibly large land mass, the size of a small island was floating in midair, climbing almost imperceptibly upward.

"...Sources from the marina say they saw Superman fire himself into the water only minutes before the giant expanse of land emerged from the water and began its ascent." came the strained voice of one reporter. "These same sources say the mass seems to be made up largely of green rock. It is speculated that the make up could be that of the mysterious kryptonite, that is believed to be the one thing on the planet that can harm Superman." The reporter paused a moment, the gravity of the situation falling nearly audibly on all those watching. "The eyes of a nation are on Superman as he appears to be trying to move the hulking burden into space..."

It seemed a lifetime before the island finally penetrated the cloud line and disappeared from view. The camera lingered there momentarily before it panned down to the worried face of the reporter.

"A hush has fallen over the crowd as everyone seems to be holding their breath. The earthquakes that rocked the city earlier are almost certainly a result of the massive-"

A horrified cry broke the anxious silence of the crowd and was joined by a dozen others. The camera fumbled a moment before finding the cause of the commotion, the lens straining to focus on the tiny form that was falling ever faster toward the earth below.

"It's difficult to see from where I'm standing, but it appears that Superman has been successful in lifting the small island into space, however, he doesn't seem to be flying. In fact-"

The reporter's voice shook before stopping completely as the camera followed Superman's descent before he disappeared behind a line of trees. The sound of a great impact shook the branches and another series of cries burst from the awestruck crowd. The camera shook momentarily as the shockwave of the impact reached the ground beneath their feet.

Shocked silence spread from the scene and spilled through the television screens into the bullpen where the entire staff of the Daily Planet stood spellbound by the broadcast being presented.

The reporter stared wordlessly into the camera for a moment, shaken to her very core. A muffled murmur seemed to come from behind the camera, bringing her back to attention.

"L- ladies and gentlemen, the status of Metropolis' own Man of Steel is unknown at this time. I can say we encourage our viewers to extend their thoughts and prayers toward a man whose bravery has saved the lives of millions. We can only hope he has not lost his own, today..."

"Turn that trash off right now!" Perry's voice boomed across the bull pen. The attention of an entire room refocused on the older man who stood in the doorway with his hands on his hips. "I don't want a single bit of hearsay being reported, you hear me? I want facts." He began pointing to various staff members, sending them out like soldiers, barking orders with all the authority of a general.

Lois sat frozen at her desk. Her heart pounded painfully in her chest as it pumped blood that had rapidly turned to ice through her veins. No. No no no....

Beside her, the phone one her desk gave a shrill cry for attention, causing her to jump in her chair. It rang again before her thoughts collected enough information to command her to pick up the handset.

"L..Lois. Lois Lane." she stammered bewilderedly.

"Lois? It's Jeremy down at Metropolis General. I just heard it come over the box that one of the ambulances picked up Superman and it's en route. I thought you'd wanna know..." Jeremy had always been a dependable source and this was the first time in their professional relationship, Lois wished he was giving her false information. "And Lois..." He said hesitantly. "They say it isn't looking too good..."

Lois opened her mouth once, ready to shout her disbelief, to scream at him for the suggestion that Superman somehow might not make it. But the words could not overcome the strangling knot building in her throat. Unable to summon forth even a goodbye, she replaced the handset in the cradle. Please, God. No.

Her whole being seemed to be frozen in time. She sat there, unable to move.

In all the times Superman had saved her life, she never once entertained the idea that he was anything but the invincible god he seemed to be. Even in the five years after his disappearance, the thing that fueled her anger was the knowledge in the depth of her soul that he wasn't dead as people speculated, but rather had chosen for whatever reason, to leave.

Now with the evidence of his possible demise staring her in the face, she didn't know what to say, how to react.

Her eyes fell to her son who sat beside her, quietly scribbling a portrait of his hero. His blue eyes turned up toward hers and for a moment she was looking into the eyes of his father, so honest and open...

"We can leave anytime you want." Richard's voice came softly from behind her.

Lois's head turned slowly. A similar shade of blue, Richard's eyes held both determination and uncertainty as he extended an invitation to escort her from his, to the side of the man she loved.

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The city passed by in a blur on the other side of the car window. With every moment the distance between them and the hospital grew smaller even as the traffic grew thicker.

The silence seemed to be a tangible, oppressive thing, seeming to draw all the air from the car. Finally, Jason reached between them from the backseat and clicked on the radio.

"She got the call today

One out of the gray…

And when the smoke cleared

It took her breath away…

She said she didn't believe

It could happen to me…

I guess we're all one phone call

from our knees...."

Richard swallowed with difficulty, his eyes never left the road as he turned the corner to the road leading to the hospital.

"We're gonna get there soon...."

The streets were full of people holding pictures and signs, each one depicting the earnest, smiling face of the man who held the heart of the woman he wanted to marry.

"If every building falls

And all the stars fade…

We'll still be singing this song

The one they can't take away..."

He tried not to notice the tears in Lois's eyes as they traveled slowly from sign to sign, caressing the two dimensional image of the man who called to her without need for a voice.

After all the years Richard had spent by her side, saying every word he knew to try and reach her heart, Superman had said more to her in his silence than Richard could ever hope to with any kind of poetry.

A soul connection, it seemed, had little need for words.

Richard turned on his hazard lights and brought the car to a stop in front of the hospital. Lois turned to him, unsure if she would be able to get into the building that held the most important man in the world.

He offered a smile and a few words of reassurance before she leaned across the seats and their lips met in a kiss. It was a goodbye kiss, in every sense of the word.

His eyes followed her into the crowd, until it swallowed her up, sweeping her into the hospital and he felt it with all certainty, out of his life.

"I'm gonna get there soon

She's gonna be there too..."

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The buzz of the crowd outside faded into the hushed sounds of a hospital. In the distance, heart monitors blipped and beeped. Nurses shoes squeaked as they made their rounds.

But the same silence that had filled the bullpen, had followed her into the car, and was now spreading throughout the halls of the hospital. A great commotion had happened here today and now, with the rest of the story hanging so precariously in the balance, no one dared speak their collective worries aloud.

Jason's hand was soft and warm in hers. She found the heat reassuring, familiar. He squeezed her fingers gently and she tilted her head to look down at him, trying to remember the complicated process of creating a smile.

They passed a nurse's station, and strains of music floated upward from the counter.

"And don't apologize

For all the tears you've cried…

You've been way too strong now for all your life…

I'm gonna get there soon

You're gonna be there too..."

"This way, Miss Lane..." The doctor offered gently as he led her toward a nondescript room just off the main hallway.

Lois struggled to take slow, deep breaths, feeling as though an unseen hand was crushing the life out of her. When she saw him, this would all be real.

She stepped up to the door and hesitated. With one breath she found the strength to push against the wood and walk into the living manifestation of her nightmare.

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It was usually in his nature to oppose the darkness.

His very strength came from the sun. It supplied him with the energy he needed, the strength to do the impossible. It was the physical embodiment of all he sought to protect; life in all its beauty ...truth uncovered by the light of day.

He lay motionless, his skin having drunk every errant drop of sunlight that had found its way through the slated window beside him. It had drained dry every particle of energy to the most essential parts of his body, struggling to sustain life.

But the sun had set, and with the dying of the light, the darkness seemed to close in all around him. He was so cold, but he lacked even the strength to shiver.

His heart labored sluggishly in his chest, exhausted, and tired from all he had put it through. His eyes were unseeing behind unmovable lids.

Everything was slowing down, sinking.

It wasn't entirely unpleasant, dying. It was a lot like going to sleep except it seemed to take longer. The falling wasn't terrible, just slow… and final.

A part of him that he struggled to remember opposed his descent. His thoughts were lazy fragments drifting on a sea of oblivion. He remembered some things… Sorrow. Pain. Loss...

He felt himself sinking again. This way was so much easier...

Then a muffled sound reached his ears. Small. Boy...

"Is he going to get better?" the small voice asked.

Jason.

"I don't know..." a softer voice answered.

He paused his descent momentarily at the sound of the voices. They sparked something new into his consciousness… Smiles. Joy. Love....

Lois.

A burst of energy bloomed inside him. Lois. He tried to say, but his lips were uncooperative, unmoving.

Beyond her voice, strains of music from the hall floated on the air to his awakening ears...

"Oh it's your light…

Oh it's your way…"

He felt her breath against his ear as she whispered. "I wanted to tell you. Jason. He's your son. And he needs you. I need you. Come back. Come back to us...I love you... Come back."

And then her breath touched him only a moment before her lips.

Lois! He called from the darkness. A son. He marveled. I have a son. He turned from the seductive call of darkness, and fought against the force seeking to drag him down into nothingness.

"Pull me out of the dark…

Just to show me the way…"

"I love you." Her words called him upward with a siren song far more compelling than the darkness's had been.

For the second time that day he reached through the abyss toward the light above. And for the second time that day, she'd found him and pulled him away from the jaws of death.

A soft, tiny pair of lips pressed momentarily against his temple, and within himself Kal El smiled. Something more powerful than the energy of the sun coursed through him now…

Hope...

Love...

Family...

The sound of the door swishing closed was clear now in his ears. The barest hint of a smile gradually began to rise like the sun on the horizon over the features of his face.

"Cryin' out now

From so far away…"

The gentle strains of music washed over him as his chest rose unassisted, taking in a long slow breath of air.

Color returned to ashen cheeks, and a shade of blue thought to be lost to the world was found once again, as Superman opened his eyes.

"You pull me closer to love…"