Omg, I wrote something! I know I haven't updated in AGES, but I just had to write something for Christmas!
After becoming obsessed with this show called The Mighty Boosh (which is my new religion), which is this British comedy written by Noel Fielding (Vince Noir) and Julian Barratt (Howard Moon), I had to write something about it. The show is only in England on the station of Channel 4. I recommend you watch some clips of it on or something.
Paring: Howard/Vince
Warnings: Nothing much, just mentions of guys kissing. There really isn't a plot to it at all. It also jumps around a bit.
I DON'T OWN! Howard Moon and Vince Noir belong to Julian Barratt and Noel Fieldings, not me.
It is written in Howard's Point Of View
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(by the way, I am aware that it switches between past and present tense, but I'm too lazy to fix it. I promise to after Christmas!)
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With Vince, it's the thought that counts more than the action itself; especially when it comes to Christmas.
I watch him as he prances around the shop, holding various Christmas decorations; hell bent on making the shop look like Christmas had thrown up in here. I tell him this, but he ignores me and puts even more tinsel up. I sigh, but I still continue to watch him. I mask the annoyance on my face and my opinions when Vince glances over at me, not willing to make Vince sad.
He catches me looking at him often, but I always look away. If he asks me about it, I just reply with something about the new jazz record I ordered for the shop and he tunes out and goes back to doing whatever Vince does in his spare time.
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Vince gets even more excited when it gets closer to Christmas, and somehow every year convinces me to go Christmas shopping with him. It gets harder to keep the annoyance that Vince can cause out of my face when he takes me Christmas shopping. I choose to grunt as he drags me to stores upon stores of the same kind of crap, pointing out things that I could get so and so as a gift, despite the fact that they hate me. He rolls his bright blue eyes at me when I start to complain, a cheeky smile on his lips as he says 'It isn't that bad...' I strongly disagree with him every time, because it is that bad. I don't voice this out loud, because seeing Vince happy, happiness that I have given him, is worth this torture. After getting everyone a gift, which Vince makes me carry, we go into the all the clothes stores to find Vince the perfect Christmas outfit. I always dread his part, but I take deep breaths, in and out again, while I smile and tell Vince 'Okay, little man.'
We go into every clothes store Vince wants to. I'm like his bitch, the way he has me well-trained. I resist the urge to groan as he suddenly grabs my arm and cuts quickly into another store, as I'm left to be dragged around, muttering apologies to every person who happened to had got in the way of Vince.
Don't think I'm mean, now. I love to spend time with Vince, he's my best mate. But, you see, I don't like going clothes shopping with him because I know that he has to get naked behind that curtain before trying on any clothes.
I know it's wrong of me to think about my best mate naked with only cheap curtains in the way, but I can't help it. It's the little things he does that make me want him. The little touches he gives me, the way his eyes light up when he's happy, the cheeky grin on his face as he explains to me another exciting adventure that could happen but never does.
It's not my fault he's so sexy.
My thoughts were interrupted when the curtain I had been staring at was pushed aside and out came Vince, in all his glory. I stopped breathing just for a second upon seeing him, studying every little detail about him, memorising how he looked in that outfit, before stuttering out a 'that looks nice'. He usually says something but I'm too busy staring at him to really notice. He then turns around and goes back behind the closed curtain and it starts all over again.
After the clothes shopping adventure, in which I am left again to carry everything that Vince has bought, we return home and have a cup of tea.
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Vince always gives me something handmade as a gift. I smile at him when he hands me the present, laughing at the gift and telling him that I love it, even though it was clearly made at the last minute. I do get a bit hurt, as Vince clearly wasn't worrying about what present to get me as he was with everyone else, but I don't mind; at least he got me a gift, even if it is crappy. But who cares, I think all the gifts he has given me are perfect and I have kept all of them in my draw since the first time he gave me one.
Nothing usually goes wrong on Christmas Day, but I always find some way of screwing it up, whatever it may be.
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We were sitting around the Christmas tree when I made the first mistake. We always sit under it as we go through our presents, and this year was no different. I notice quietly to myself that Vince has more presents then I do, before laughing at myself (on the inside, of course) on how much I sound like a child. I finished opening mine before Vince does, so I have to wait from him. I causally glance at him every couple of seconds, though looking away quickly as I don't want him to notice, and my eyes glance around the room. Out of the corner of my eye, as I was looking away from Vince at the time, I notice something green falling down the roof. I look up and I realise that there's a plant-like thing hanging from it, which could only be mistletoe. Now, this did surprise me, as you'd think I would have seen it before hand, but I didn't.
I saw my chance there. It could've been the only chance I would ever get in kissing Vince. So I took a deep breath, mentally prepared myself for the worst and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and before he could ask what was going on, I closed the distance between us and kissed him full on the lips.
It was an OK kiss, but I haven't been kissed or kissed anyone before so I really have nothing to compare it to. I awkwardly moved my lips against his for a couple of seconds; Vince was frozen in place, before realising just how awkward the kiss was. I drew back and looked into Vince's eyes, which were filled with confusion. I smile sadly, while pointing up. 'Mistletoe' I say quietly as I move slightly away from him. The confusion is quickly replaced with understanding.
Vince looked me in the eye and said 'I didn't know you were into that tradition'. From what I can tell he doesn't look bothered by the fact he was just kissed by his best mate, but I don't even start to pretend to know what goes on in Vince's mind.
I replied with 'I am now.' And I hope that he doesn't start to yell at me. But he doesn't, he just smiles and announces he's going to make a cup of tea and If I would like one.
I'm now sitting by myself under the Christmas tree, fighting back tears and thoughts of loneliness, knowing full well that Vince will never get how I really feel about him. I let out a shaky breathe, telling myself to forget about it, as I go into the kitchen to join Vince with making the cups of tea.
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Like it? Hate it? What is this crap? Please review and tell me! Flames will be now given to my editor, who will grammar and spell check them and maybe add sentence or two, and send them back to me so I can then send them back to the senders. But, instead of putting me through that hard process, you can just not flame.