This just a SHORT silly little One Shot I did for ilsuocantante (wearingwords) Birthday Surprise. HAPPT BIRTHDAY BB!!!
It is pretty much fueled by three things she loves (which I do as well): Dirty Nerdy Boys, Panera, and Good Music.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to Anntastic23 (of www(dot)twi-fecta(dot)blogspot(dot)com so funny you need to read it!!) and the AMAZING Kimpy0464(who is even more fantastic in person) for pulling out their red pens so quickly.
Stephenie owns all things Twilight....I just own way too many cardigans for one who isn't a librarian.
"That's right whore, keep on walking with your fake blonde hair and stupid skinny jeans. Really, who the fuck wears skinny jeans? They don't look good on anybody. You're lucky I didn't pull my bitchbrow out or you'd be in a world of trouble." I ranted to myself when the Real Housewives of OC-reject huffed and puffed as I sat down at the highly coveted table.
Panera was wonderful, offering Wi-Fi to their customers and all, but what everyone really wanted was a power outlet so they could sit their ass in here all damn day. Luckily, I'd grabbed the last table next to an outlet. I pulled out my laptop and booted up while I did my usual nerdy-boy scan. Today, even the greatness that was Panera hadn't pulled in any horn rimmed hotties.
As I waited to connect to the internet, I turned my attention back to my Tomato Mozzarella Panini and Broccoli Cheese Soup. I was enjoying the mouthgasm so much, I hadn't noticed dripping a little soup on my cardigan, resulting in a large, orangey-green stain.
"Fucking orange-staining-soupy goodness," I mumbled to myself as I removed the stained fabric, leaving me in nothing but a black tank top. I held the cardigan on my lap and wiped at the spot, trying to keep it from setting in. Of course the one day I forget my Tide To Go Pen!
"Excuse me."
"Yes," I answered, my eyes never leaving my lap.
"I hate to ask, but I have to finish something for work and my laptop just died. Would you mind if I plugged it in here?"
Boo-hoo, buddy. You should have been using your eagle eye to scope this place out like I was. Not to mention a little thing called personal space. A two person table is really just big enough for one person, their lunch, and a laptop.
"Well, actually I wa-"I stopped short as my gaze moved from my lap, up to the man looking at me questioningly.
HeyNow.
He was perfect, not in the perfect-perfect sort of way, more in the non-perfect-perfect way. His brown hair, with hints of russet running throughout, was messy, looking adorably disheveled. My breathing became noticeably more difficult when I saw the dark black glasses that framed his incredible jade eyes. His features were strong and angular….especially his jaw. God Bless that jaw; it was accentuated by the perfect "I haven't shaved in a day" beard. My eyes continued down, as if on their own volition, taking in his slightly faded black v-neck t-shirt and perfectly worn jeans. As my gaze fell to his generously-sized feet and noticed that he had a pair of slip-on vans I heard him clearing his throat above me.
"I'm sorry, what?" I asked, realizing I had just thoroughly eye-fucked this poor guy.
"I was wondering if I could use the power outlet here at the table," he said again, looking from my face to his feet a bit awkwardly. His laptop was tucked under his arm as he held the power cord with the same hand, his long beautiful fingers grasping the cord in his palm. He pushed his glasses up on his nose with his free hand, before moving it into his hair where he seemed to almost assault the poor strands.
"Of course you can," I stammered, moving my tray of food and laptop over so he could have some space.
"Thanks, this piece of shit keeps cutting out on me."
Unf. Please to be talking like that all the time you, dirty-nerdy boy.
He bent under the table looking for the power outlet, and I could see the smallest hint of gray peeking out from below his jeans. The fact that his beautiful face was under the table and only a few feet away from my pretty parts did not escape me. I shifted in my seat, thinking of him closing that small space between us and the wonderful things he could do with that dirty mouth of his.
I kept my eyes trained on the screen of my laptop trying to retain the last shred of dignity I had after so shamelessly eye-fucking him earlier. I watched his forearms flex as he opened the laptop, and felt I might have to bite my knuckle soon to keep from whimpering if he did that again.
He looked intently at the screen and messed with the power cord a few more times. His eyebrows were knitted together in concentration and I had the strangest urge to muss his hair even more, because he looked like such a scowling little boy.
"Mother fuck!" He snarled at the computer before slamming it shut. "I'm sorry; I shouldn't have said that in front of you."
You can say 'fuck' to me all day long….or just fuck me all day long, your choice.
"Oh I think I can handle it, I have a pretty fucking dirty mouth myself," I smiled at him, thinking of how easily and often certain four letter words fell from my mouth.
His adam's apple bobbed noticeably as he swallowed, his eyes never leaving my mouth. I felt blood coursing to my cheeks as I thought about what I had just said. I laughed nervously and took a sip of my drink, wishing I could crawl under the table.
And between his legs.
"I'm sorry I haven't introduced myself. I'm Edward Cullen," he spoke in a smooth voice as he extended his hand to me across the table. The name seemed to ring a bell, but I was not able to place it.
"Bella Swan." I took his hand in mine and felt the undeniably roughened skin on the pads of his fingers, leading me to thoughts of Edward and a guitar. I felt a jolt of electricity run through my body from the mere touch of his skin against mine. I pulled my hand away, slightly stunned by the sensation, and looked up to see a similar expression bloom on his face.
"So your computer isn't working?" I asked dumbly, knowing full and well it wasn't.
"No, and I am supposed to email this over to a new client in fifteen minutes for approval. I don't know what I'm going to do now; there is no way in hell I can make it over to my office by then." He shrugged, holding up what looked like a mini skateboard in his hand.
"Is that a jump drive?" I asked, unable to hold my laughter at bay.
"Yeah, I always back everything up on it. A lot of good it does me if I can't get my computer to work."
"Well shit, I happen to have a working computer right here; would you care to use it?" I asked, pushing my it across the table to him.
His green eyes met mine from across the table and they showed both his thanks and relief. I waved his thanks off and went back to eating my sandwich, which I knew was absurd since nobody should feel comfortable eating in front of the hottest guy on earth, but it was a Panera Tomato Mozzarella Panini.
"Bella, I'm sorry, it's asking for your password. I guess it was idle for too long."
"Sure," I said getting up and moving behind him. His scent insidiously assaulted me with its warm spicy aroma as I stood by his shoulder; he was simply intoxicating.
I leaned forward to type my password and he moved his body to the side to allow me access. He had not moved all the way to the side; and my breast grazed his strong, broad shoulder, causing a clit-twitch heard 'round the world. My fingers waivered momentarily as I tried to remember my password after the most action I'd had in a while. I finished entering the password and returned to my seat as Edward shifted awkwardly in his.
"Do you have PhotoShop on here? I need to check the design before I send it out."
"Yeah, I do. Are you a graphic designer?"
"I do photography and graphic design. This is actually for a marketing company we were just hired to do a huge new ad campaign for."
We sat in silence a little longer while he worked away on my laptop and I sifted through all of my work emails on my Blackberry. We both kept stealing glances of one another across the table, looking away shyly once we were caught. I felt like a twelve year old girl who just got a note from her crush that said "I like you. Do you like me? Check Yes or No."
I think that's what they mean by the term "giddy as a school girl."
I looked up from my phone to see a slightly crooked grin across Edward's face.
"What?" I asked, wiping at my face, worried I had food somewhere else.
"Nothing, you just have great taste in music."
"Are you snooping around my computer?" I asked, feigning a shocked tone.
Umm, actually there missy, you should be worried. Did you forget about all of that porn you have on that computer?
"I wasn't snooping! I just saw the folder labeled "Pedro the Lion." Though I have to say, if that is on your desktop, it might just be worth it to snoop around and see what else you have in here," Edward said in a teasing tone.
"Oh, my dear boy, I don't think you could handle that," I said, unable to control the flirtiness that he seemed to pull out of me.
*Ding*
I looked down at my Blackberry as the notification for a new email chimed in my hand. I opened my mail and scrolled to the new message.
Sender: EC Designs
Subject: New Campaign Designs for Approval
I looked up from my phone, my heart soaring as my mind raced to put all the pieces together.
"Edward, it looks like I'm going to get to tell you what to do for the next couple of months," I said, smiling at the hot, glasses-wearing, good-music-listening, dirty-mouthed man sitting in front of me.
A/N: The title is actually a take on a Pedro the Lion song "Bad Diary Days" which is so amazing.
Just a little PSA here folks….if you don't listen to Pedro the Lion or David Bazan you really should. It's Hard to Find a Friend is one of the BEST CDs.
ALSO...this little Birthday Surprise popped not 1 but 2 Fic Auth's Cherries!!!! Go read...and leave them LOTS of love!!
Imdominating wrote: Guess Who's Coming to Lunch www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5602098/1/Guess_Whos_Coming_to_Lunch
Wisdomous wrote: Rub My Ass and Call Me Bella www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/5601972/1/