Author's note: Inspired by the speech from 'Macbeth', Act V, Scene V, which is the long italicised part in the middle.
In the same theme as my previous story, 'Prepared To Love'
I am fascinated by the idea of love in a show like 24, which is essentially a love story, particularly in Seasons 1, 4, 5 and 6. I mentioned Coldplay's 'Don't Panic' due to the fact that there is a poster of Coldplay's album 'Parachutes' on Kim's bedroom door in Season 1, and that is my favourite song from that album.
Oh, and sorry if there are some spelling goofs. I'm Australian, you see, and we write words the proper way.
Disclaimer: I don't own anyone or anything here. Except, you know, the actual words. The characters are Fox's, as is the show, and the song is Coldplay's. The speech is Shakespeare's.
SHE SHOULD HAVE DIED HEREAFTER
There were tears, and there were stifled sobs. There was heartbreak and sadness and grief. Pain. Agony. Utter despair. It was a familiar, and necessary, if sad, state of affairs here.
After all, this place had been built on those things, and had prospered. It was a graveyard. A cemetery. Jack Bauer had been to a dozen of these places. But he never thought that he would be burying his wife at one of them. He had always though that it would be her burying him, in another twenty years, or, knowing his job, sometime in the next five.
Still, it was he burying her.
His family, hers, all her friends, some of his. Teri had been one of those special people, able to make friends with anyone in a heartbeat. Her smile had been enough to outshine the sun; her touch had been enough for him to know that he would be loved for the rest of time.
Even when they were having problems, and he had sought solace in the arms of another, he had known that she would always, and forever, love him, and that he would love no one as long as he could still love her.
But now she was gone, her life ended in the most horrible way; on the concrete floor of a cold, hard room in an anonymous government building, betrayed by one of the people she, and Jack, had trusted most.
Nina Myers.
Jack still saw the bitch, squirming beneath grip. He still felt the gun in his hand, pressed into her neck. He still heard her voice, sniveling, so desperate for some kind of escape from the man she had cheated. He still smelt the fear, and still tasted the hate he had had for her at that moment, the rage and disgust and self-loathing for trusting Nina in the first place.
He had allowed himself to trust her, allowed her near his family.
And now Teri, his beautiful wife, his soul-mate, his angel, the first woman to ever break through his shell of emotional detachment, was dead.
And then the time came. The crowd of mourners parted for him, and Jack saw the black coffin in which his wife would spend her eternity, raised above the pit in the ground in which it would spend its eternity. He felt a hand on his shoulder, and saw the tear streaked face of his brother, and his brother's wife. Their little boy was grim and stoic. Much like Jack himself.
And then there was Kim, her eyes covered by dark sunglasses.
Jack reached into the pocket of his suit jacket, and took out a single sheet of paper.
He had never been a philosophical man, never interested in literature. But one famous speech had stayed with him since high school. He made his way to the front of the crowd, stood to attention before the coffin that held his angel, and turned towards the crowd.
He saw Graem, and Marilyn, little Josh. Saw Teri's friends, and that doctor who had helped her, just out of the hospital. He saw Carol, Teri's sister, and some of his friends from work. Milo Pressman, Tony Almeida, Paul Wilson. And, at the back, he saw his father, a giant, gaunt figure above the crowd.
Even further back he saw a single black car, its windows darkened.
But in the centre, he saw Kim.
Everyone had told him how much she reminded them of him, but jack saw only Teri in her face, and her movements. It was enough to break his heart just knowing that every time he saw her he would be reminded of the tragedy that had snatched Teri away from them.
He cleared his throat, and began to speak. "I'd like to share with one of Teri's favorite quotes, and one of mine.
She should have died hereafter;
There would have been time for such a word,
Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day,
To the last syllable of recorded time;
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out brief candle.
Life's but a walking shadow…"
Jack trailed off, and paused, a lump rising in his throat. She was gone. It hit him hard then than it had before, and he felt tears spring into the corner of his eyes. He swallowed before going on.
"…a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing. "
Jack paused, and heard a renewed round of sobbing from the crowd. "Teri loved that speech. But she also disagreed with it. She told me once, that she thought that life didn't signify nothing. To her, it signified everything. And she felt that those 'poor players' were only those who could not accept that death was a part of life. She was a rare person. She was a radiant person. I love her, and I will miss her. Goodbye, Teri." He turned back to the coffin, as it started to lower into the ground, as a song his daughter had chosen played over the loudspeakers. A band called Coldplay, Kim had told him, something called 'Don't Panic'.
It was beautiful. Teri would have loved it.
He stepped aside. His role done. But he wasn't satisfied. He didn't find solace. And so, under his breath, he added one final thought, something he had said before, as he had held her lifeless body in his arms.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
The funeral was over, the crowd's dispersed, and people offered their condolences to Jack, and to Kim. Then they left, and their lives would continue, go on the same. They had said their goodbyes to their friend, their family member.
But Jack's would not.
Kim's would not.
Their lives had been irrevocably altered on the day of the California Presidential Primary, because one evil man hadn't been killed two years to the day before. It was, in essence, Jack's failure on that mission that had killed his wife, and his actions on that day had lead to her death.
Finally, almost everyone had departed, save five people. The closest to him was Tony Almeida, so Jack made for his friend. Tony proffered his hand, and Jack took it.
"Jack, I'm so sorry."
"Yeah," Jack felt another pang of guilt and agony remembering how he had taken Teri into this. And he how hadn't gotten her out. "Tony, thank you for helping Teri and Kim when I couldn't. Thank you."
"Jack, don't worry about it. If you ever come back to CTU, we'll be ready for you." Tony said, patting his friend on the back. "We will."
"Yeah, I don't think I will." Jack said, his face still a grim mask.
Tony nodded in understanding, told Jack to call him if he ever needed anything, and left. Jack turned to the next person who hadn't yet left. His brother, standing with Marilyn and Josh.
Jack walked towards them, and Graem towards him. They hugged, awkwardly.
"God, Jack," Graem said, a look of concern on his face. "I'm so sorry. This is horrible. Dad wanted to stay longer, but he had a meeting."
Jack glanced sidelong at the man he had grown up him. All he could say was "Yeah."
There was some more of the pleasantries, some vague offerings of condolences, some equally vague acceptances, and three more people had left what was left of the gathering.
Only Kim remained.
Jack walked towards her, placed his arm around her shoulders. She turned to him, buried her face into his chest, tears streaming down her cheeks, onto his suit. He hugged her tightly, and, on another level, enveloped her with his love. He had long ago turned away from the family he had been born with, had invited them to the funeral merely as a courtesy. He had immersed himself in his job to fill in his emotional holes, and had eventually had made a new family for himself of Teri, and of Kim.
Now Teri was gone, and he no longer had a job. All he had was Kim.
That was all he wanted.
