SANTA BOBBY
He did not, as so many people thought, dislike Christmas. He liked Christmas. He liked the lights and decorations. He liked the television specials (especially THE GRINCH and CHARLIE BROWN, although he found RUDOLPH disturbing) and the music (although if he never heard "I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas" again in his life he'd be very happy). He liked playing Santa, although he never publicized his appearances. He liked the food, including the peppermint mochas that appeared in coffee shops. He liked the idea of taking time to reflect on life, to appreciate friends and to give them small expressions of affection and gratitude. And, although he couldn't believe as he had when he was a child, he liked the idea of a baby born to save all people from their sins. But in his life, Christmas had rarely been a good time, and it had never been the glorious occasion depicted on cards and in some of those lesser TV specials. Christmas was so often a disappointment that he came to prefer the times he could spend it working, and the few times he couldn't work on the day before and of the holiday he'd resorted to the oblivion of alcohol.
During his suspension, he'd dreaded the holidays, but the calls for his services as Santa fortunately remained. He wondered if the children who came to him knew they were saving Santa that year. He was very grateful that his former captain provided him with work on that year's Christmas Day with a security job, but, as he walked around the warehouse, he wondered just how pathetic it was to want to hear hollow echoes of steps instead of happy voices. There had always been moments when the sight of happy parents and children could both warm and stab his heart, but it was worse around Christmas, and it seemed much worse his first Christmas without his mother. As he patrolled the warehouse, he wondered why he should miss her so much on this particular day. He'd rarely spent Christmas Eve or Day with his mother. He was usually working, and even if he wasn't, he avoided visiting her on those days. There were too many people trying to make up for too many missed visits with too many relatives, and there was always the chance he'd run into his brother. Now there was no mother. There was no brother.
"Oh, Damn," his partner said softly.
He looked across his desk. "What's wrong, Eames?"
"Oh…Minor Eames family emergency. My cousin Brian was going to play Santa at my family's Christmas Eve party this year. He usually does it. But his company downsized because of the recession, and he just found out he's going to have to work."
"Could someone else in your family…"
"None of them really looks like Santa. And we don't have a costume, and I don't think we could get one this late…" Alex sighed. "It's not that big a deal…We can always say Santa left the presents…But…"
"What is it?"
"Well…It's probably going be the last believe in Santa year for about three of my nieces and nephews…And…Some of us adults…Wanted to help them hold on for a while." Alex shrugged. "You know…Adults trying to hold on to being kids too…"
Bobby performed some calculations in his mind. "Uh…Eames…Uh…How late was Santa supposed to come?"
Alex gave him a puzzled look. "Oh…I don't know…Around 5:30 on Christmas Eve. Before dinner…"
"If…If you could move it back to…Well…I…I've got a date to give out presents at one of the juvie centers…If…I mean…I'll have the suit…And it fits me really well…"
"You…You'd do that?"
"Sure…I…I'll need a ride to and from wherever you're having the party…"
"Let me check…But…Bobby…This would be great!" She beamed at him, and Bobby's insides turned to goo.
Bobby had heard that large families were great at organizing things quickly. The Eames family certainly was. Within an hour, Bobby's schedule for the next day was arranged. Eddie, the husband of Eames' older sister and a lieutenant in the Fire Department would pick Bobby up, brief him on the nieces and nephews and their presents, and drive him to the large house of Eames' older brother. Santa would arrive around eight—Bobby gently stressed that he had to fulfill his obligation to the center first, and the Eames family had no objections whatever to that—and hand out the gifts. Alex was thrilled, and Bobby thrilled that he could help her.
"Thank you," she said as she left for the day. "I'll see you tomorrow night…Merry Christmas, Bobby."
"Merry Christmas, uh…Alex."
He lay awake most of the night. He was always nervous about being Santa. He wanted it to be perfect for all the children he saw, especially since he knew he might be all they would experience for Christmas. He'd researched the role scrupulously, memorizing the reindeer's names and details about the North Pole. He'd played the part enough times that Mr. Ceroni, the owner of the costume shop, set aside a suit for him. Over the years the Ceronis had added little touches to the costume so that it was now one of their best Santa outfits, but Bobby noted that the rental price hadn't changed since the second or third year he'd worn it. One of the juvie center's counselors picked him up at Major Case when he got off around two, and the young woman watched in amazement as Mr. Ceroni and his daughter helped Bobby on with the suit.
"Wow…The kids are going to love this," she said. "I'm Jewish, and you make me believe."
Mr. Ceroni grinned. From beneath the beard, Bobby laughed. "I take that as a great compliment. The truth is, I'm always really nervous about this. I know this means so much to the kids…That this may be all they get…I don't want to blow it for them."
Eddie Santos, wearing his NYFD jacket, marched down the main hall of the St. Francis Center. Even if the receptionist hadn't given him such good directions, he could've found the room with the holiday party by following the cheerful, raucous sounds. He knew from what his sister-in-law told him that the kids in this center weren't bad kids, but kids who'd got in trouble because their parents couldn't or wouldn't take care of them. But he was still uneasy about being in this building, partly because he'd grown up with so many kids who'd spent too many holidays in places like this. He was even more uneasy about meeting his sister-in-law's partner. Alex told Eddie that Bobby Goren was a good guy and cop, and Alex's word carried a lot of weight with Eddie. But Eddie also heard that Goren was more than a little weird, and the oldest Eames kid, Mike, viewed Goren with more than a little suspicion. Eddie hoped that the hour or so he'd have to spend with Goren wouldn't be too uncomfortable.
Eddie followed the sounds and entered a room blazing with light and joy. Kids ran everywhere, all clutching a new toy. Several table scattered with the remains of food and drink sat near the door. Three older boys stood near the drink table and shared the last bottle of soda.
"That Santa is great," Eddie heard one of them say.
"Yea," another boy said. "I don't believe any more…But he's terrific…He knows his stuff…And…I mean, look at that outfit!"
Eddie looked into the far corner of the room. Santa sat on a large, old, frayed chair. A flock of children surrounded him, staring up at him with wide, happy eyes. He was, Eddie agreed with the boys, a great Santa. His long white hair and whiskers shone. His red hat and coat were brushed crimson velvet; the white fur lining them spotless. His boots shone so brightly that the children's faces reflected in them. As Eddie grew closer, he heard Santa's low, warm, gentle voice.
"Around September and October, the reindeer start taking longer practice runs. They come down as far as the middle of the United States."
"Do they fly over New York?" a little girl asked breathlessly.
"Yes," Santa said. "All of them take a practice run over New York City and all the big cities. They take some special effort because there's so many buildings and children." Santa saw Eddie. "I'm sorry, kids. My escort has arrived. I have to get going if I'm going to deliver all of those presents. If you want to know more about my reindeer, go to the libraries and get books about them. Ok?"
A chorus of "Oks!" and "Don't go, Santa!" followed. Santa raised his hands.
"You're great kids. I'm glad I got to make my first stop here. But I've got to make my rounds. I bet my reindeer are bursting to go. Is that right, Lieutenant Santos?"
Eddie snapped to attention. "Yes, Sir. I'm here to make sure you get to them as soon as possible."
"Wow," a little boy said. "You're a real fireman?"
"Yes, he is," Santa said as he stood. "I know who the real heroes are who can help me."
Eddie and the center's staff gently cleared a path for Santa. It was slow going, since Santa frequently stopped to receive hugs from the children. They finally reached the door, and Santa turned. "Remember," he called. "You're good kids. Merry Christmas!"
A chorus of "Merry Christmas!" and "Thank you!" followed them out the door.
The staff showered Santa with praise and thanks as Eddie led him to the car. "Thank you," Santa said. "I had a great time."
"Can anyone see us?" Santa asked once he and Eddie were in the car.
"I don't think so." Eddie looked around carefully.
"Good." Santa carefully removed his hat, wig, and beard to reveal a slightly disheveled Bobby Goren. "Edward Santos?" He extended a gloved hand.
"Yea…Eddie…"
"Bobby Goren…"
"Here…" Eddie pulled a bottle of water from the back of his truck. "Figured Santa might need some water."
"Thanks…" Bobby swallowed a third of the bottle. "That can be hot work."
"You're…You're really good," Eddie said admiringly. "Even the nonbelievers in the back said so."
Bobby smiled. "Good to hear…"
"The kids are going to love this," Eddie said. "Thanks for doing it."
"I owe Eames…Alex…a lot…I'm glad to do it. Now…" Bobby sat back. "Tell me everything you can about these kids…"
For the next hour, as he weaved through the holiday traffic, Eddie told Bobby everything he could about the Eames nieces and nephews and cousins. Bobby listened intently, occasionally interrupting to clear a point.
"You gonna remember all of this?" Eddie asked as they neared the house.
"I hope I can remember enough," Bobby smiled. "Listen…Make sure I get to the littlest kids first. They're probably going to be the most tired and impatient." He reached for his wig, beard, and hat. He turned the car's mirror towards him and carefully reapplied the elements of his costume. "How do I look?"
Eddie stared at him. "I think I want to tell you what I want for Christmas."
"Sorry," Bobby said from beneath his beard. "You've aged out."
"Are you ready? I'm supposed to give Alex a call when you're on your way," Eddie said.
"I think so," Bobby said. He stepped from the truck and warily examined the large bags of presents in the truck's back. "I may need some elves to help with these."
"Don't worry," Eddie said. "The big guy in red is here, Alex," he spoke into his cell phone. "He looks great. And from what I saw at the center, he's going to be great with the kids."
"You're putting some pressure on me," Bobby said. "This may be a tougher crowd."
"Maybe…But here comes some more help," Eddie said.
Alex's oldest brother Mike jogged from behind a corner of the house. A weight descended in Bobby's stomach. His encounters with Mike weren't always pleasant. Mike had nearly attacked Bobby when they met in the hospital parking lot while Alex recovered from her kidnapping. Only Alex's father's appearance saved Bobby from the beating he wouldn't have fought. Bobby was terribly uncertain of what kind of welcome he might receive from Mike.
Mike stopped a few feet from Bobby. "Wow," he said. "I'd heard you were good…But…Wow."
Bobby was enormously relieved.
"C'mon," Mike continued. "Alex has the kids convinced you're coming in the back door. So, we're going in the front."
"Ok," Bobby said.
"We've got the presents," Eddie said as he handed one of the bags to Mike. "After you, Mr. Claus…"
Bobby nodded. He stepped up to the front door, shook the bells hanging on it, and in a strong, cheery voice called out, "Ho! Ho! Ho!"
Alex Eames regretted few things about her partnership with Bobby Goren. She never regretted the existence of the partnership—one of the few things she did regret was that she couldn't convince Bobby of that. One minor regret was that, due to her many obligations during the holidays, she'd never seen his legendary performance as Santa Claus. She was happy that Bobby was able to step in to play Santa for her family for many reasons; one was that she'd finally get to see him in the red suit. Another was that she hoped she might persuade him to join her family's celebration for at least a short period.
Eddie's phone call alerted Alex to Santa's arrival. Eddie's positive assessment and the reports of Bobby's efforts as Santa didn't prepare Alex for this particular Santa. He looked the part more than any Santa she'd ever seen, but it wasn't just his appearance. Bobby was Santa. The youngest Eames family members rushed into the front room when they heard Santa's deep, glorious laugh. Their first sight of him, filling the front door, stunned them into silence. Before chaos could return, Santa raised his white gloved hands.
"I understand," he said in a voice Alex wouldn't have recognized as Bobby's unless she knew it was his. "That you've all been very good this year. I hope you can be good for a few more minutes." He walked towards a large chair near the Christmas tree. "I'm sorry I'm so late. But I'm sure you understand that this is a very busy day for me."
The wide-eyed children nodded.
"But I promise I hand out all your presents before I go and talk to you if you want. So, let's start the youngest…And if the older children could help the little ones…That would be great…"
He was wonderful with the children. His good and warm nature inspired them to their best behavior. Even the youngest, who at first seemed overwhelmed by this big man in a bright red suit, relaxed in his presence. The children loved him within five minutes, the adults in six. He was infinitely patient with both, taking time to listen to the kids and allow the grown-ups to take pictures. Alex's mother and father, who still took very seriously their roles as the hosts of the Christmas Eve Party, beamed. "Lex," her older sister, the one who tended to take everything very seriously and went into a funk if a fork was out of place, whispered. "He's terrific. It was a great party, but he's made it something special." Even her brother Mike was pleased. "The kids will remember this," he told her.
Alex worried a little about her nephew Nate. He knew Bobby from visits to Major Case, museums, the beach, and the zoo, and he was an exceptionally bright kid. If anyone could see through the beard and the wig and the red suit, it'd be Nate. He waited patiently for his turn with Santa. Alex nervously watched as he graciously accepted his present and thanked Santa. Nate leaned forward and whispered gravely in Santa's ear. Santa didn't move for a moment, and Alex feared the game was up. But Santa leaned forward and whispered in Nate's ear. The little boy smiled and skipped away.
Every present was finally distributed and every picture taken. Several of the children begged Santa to stay, but he gravely shook his head. "I'd love to stay," he said. "There's wonderful Christmas spirit here. But I have a lot…A LOT…of places to visit tonight."
"How can you do that?" one of the children asked.
"Magic," Santa replied simply. "Like this…" He stepped up to the child, reached up to her ears, and held out several Hershey kisses to her. "And this…" He turned to Nate, reached behind the boy's shoulders, and brought his hand back with a candy cane. A delighted Nate seized it.
"Remember," Santa said. The children gazed at him. "Be good. Be kind. Remember that you're special…Merry Christmas!"
Alex waited for him at the front door. Santa paused, and a little girl cried out, "Mistletoe, Santa! You have to kiss Aunt Alex!"
As the other children took up the cry, Santa looked at Alex, who smiled warmly at him. "I don't think Mrs. Claus would mind, do you?" she asked, and stood on her toes. Santa leaned over, and gently brushed his lips against her cheek.
Alex led him out the front door as a chorus of cheers and good wishes followed him. "This way," she said and guided him into the garage attached to the house. "Back here…This part is heated and there's a shower…Eddie brought your clothes in here and the bags for the suit…"
Bobby looked around to be sure no children could see his transformation. He carefully removed the hat, wig and beard and handed them to Alex. "Could you put these away? The bags are marked…"
"Sure…" Alex carefully placed the pieces in their proper places as Bobby removed the other parts of his costume. His hair and T-shirt were damp with sweat. "Looks like this is hot work…"
"Yea…But I don't notice while I'm doing it. The kids were great."
"This is a beautiful costume," Alex said. "Do you need to have it cleaned or anything?"
Bobby shook his head. "The Ceronis take care of that. I'm not sure they'd trust it to anyone else. They tell me they use this one as the template for all the other Santa outfits."
"The shower's in there…You can hand me the pants and I'll put them away."
"Thank you…" Bobby turned. "Is Eddie taking me home?"
"I am," Alex said evenly. "And I'm afraid my family insists that you stay for at least a little while."
Bobby rubbed the back of his neck. "Nate," he said softly.
"Did he know it was you?"
"No…But…But he told me that…That I reminded him of a friend…A friend that he wanted to come and see him…" Bobby glanced at her. "I…I guess I gotta show up…If Nate asked Santa…"
Alex concentrated on putting the boots in their box. "I…I guess you do…"
Fifteen minutes later the Santa costume was carefully stored in the trunk of Alex's car, and Bobby, wearing a dark green sweater and black jeans and his leather jacket over his arm, followed Alex into the hours. He hesitated when they reached the door.
"It's ok, Bobby…They want you here…"
"It…You're sure? I mean…This is…"
"Listen." She faced him and placed her hands on his chest. "You're wanted…Really…Besides, I'm not taking you home for a while, and no one else is going to do it. And I'm not letting you stay outside and freeze. Ok?"
"Ok…"
Bobby had always thought one of the most pleasant sensations of winter was the experience of going from the cold outside to a warm inside. The house glowed with physical and emotional warmth and light. The excitement of Santa had cooled to a gentle buzz among the kids, who were happily playing with their gifts. The grownups spoke in a happy harmony. Bobby shyly followed Alex into the kitchen; before he knew what was happening, someone took his coat and handed him a drink and a plate of food. He was showered with "Thank you" and "Great job" and other praise as Alex guided him through the kitchen and into the living room. He feebly protested, but everyone insisted he take one of the seats of honor near the Christmas tree. Nate saw him and moved quickly through the crowd.
"Bobby! You came!"
"I did…Your Aunt Alex insisted…" Bobby carefully placed his plate and cup on a table near his chair.
"I knew you'd come." Nate hugged Bobby. "Santa promised."
"Well…If Santa promised, it had to happen." Bobby tried not to look at Alex.
The food was wonderful, and Bobby's plate was never empty until he finally begged the various Eameses to stop bringing him more. He shyly accepted holiday greetings and watched as the family celebrated. Nate sat next to him most of the time and spoke excitedly about Santa's visit. Bobby hadn't planned to stay long, but he didn't want to pull Alex away from her family. And, he admitted to himself, he was having a good time.
The kids finally began to fall asleep; Nate collapsed leaning against Bobby. Parents and children drifted away. Some of the adults prepared to go to Midnight Mass. Alex appeared in front of Bobby. She smiled.
"Nate bother you too much?" she asked.
"No," Bobby said. "He could never bother me too much."
"Well, I know you plan to work tomorrow. I better get you home…"
Bobby carefully eased from his chair trying not to wake Nate. The boy yawned but didn't open his eyes. Alex handed him his coat, and they slowly made their way through the remaining Eameses to the front door. The air was crisp and cold as they walked to Alex's car, and Bobby thought one of the other great winter sensations was walking out into the cold from a warm room. They were quiet for several minutes in the car.
"You ok?" Alex asked gently.
"Yea…Just…A little tired. I really don't know how Santa does it…"
"He has a lot of help…You…You can have that too, you know," Alex said.
"I…I know…I…I'm trying to be better about asking for it…Accepting it…"
"I know…I'm glad about that, Bobby…"
They rode in a comfortable silence for most of the drive to his home. She pulled up in his drive, stepped out of the car, and helped him carry his Santa suit inside.
"You'll be ok?" she asked.
"Yes…Thank you…Alex. I…I had a great time…"
"Thank you…I suspect Brian will have a hard time getting back the role of Santa…"
Bobby smiled. "I…I'd like the chance to do it again…"
"One other thing I'd like," Alex said softly. "I know there's no mistletoe, but…" She stepped up on her toes and kissed his cheek. "Merry Christmas, Bobby…"
"Merry Christmas, Alex…"
END
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