welcome to hell!
yeah this is the baccano! texting AU that no one asked for. here are some screen names to keep everyone in check:
Thing 1: Isaac
Thing 2: Miria
Sound of Silence: Keith
Bergameister: Berga
ReadingPoe: Luck
YoungestCamorrista: Firo
Just Ennis: Ennis
TheBookkeeper: Maiza
WellNoMatter: Ronnie
Thing 1 has added Thing 2, Sound of Silence, Bergameister, ReadingPoe, YoungestCamorrista, Just Ennis to the group.
Thing 1 has renamed this conversation to "#immortals"
YoungestCamorrista: something new?
Bergameister: ? what is this
Just Ennis: It looks like a group chat.
Thing 1: That's exactly what it is!
Bergameister: obvisouly its a group chat
Bergameister: *obviously
Bergameister: but what is the purpose
Thing 2: For us to chat! Isaac thought it would be a good idea, and I thought so too!
ReadingPoe: Sorry I was reading something. What is this?
Thing 1: A group chat for all of the immortals! Well, some of them, anyway.
YoungestCamorrista: i was gonna say
YoungestCamorrista: theres not too many of us in here
Sound of Silence: …
Sound of Silence added TheBookkeeper, WellNoMatter to the group.
Sound of Silence: Have fun.
YoungestCamorrista: NO
Just Ennis: I think Firo just choked. Are you okay?
YoungestCamorrista: i repeat, NO
Bergameister: hey look its firo's dads
TheBookkeeper: I'm not sure he likes us having that title
Thing 2: Should we introduce ourselves?
ReadingPoe: We all know each other.
ReadingPoe: Also Firo, your typing skills have gotten worse since the last time we talked. You stopped capitalizing your "I"s.
YoungestCamorrista: fuck u i type how i want
Bergameister: #edgyteen
YoungestCamorrista: im not a teen fuck u too berga
Just Ennis: Firo, be nice
WellNoMatter: Yes Firo, be nice. That's an order from your father
YoungestCamorrista: Ronnie i stg u r not my dad
YoungestCamorrista: ill listen to ennis but not to Ronnie
TheBookkeeper: It's okay Firo, we still love you
YoungestCamorrista: ffs
Bergameister: what a beautiful family
YoungestCamorrista: ok technically we r family but
TheBookkeeper: So that means we're your fathers
YoungestCamorrista: gdi maiza no i wasnt gonna say that
Just Ennis: I think you two would be great dads, Firo just doesn't want to admit it.
YoungestCamorrista: why do you all hate me
TheBookkeeper: Thank you, Ennis!
WellNoMatter: So kind of you.
WellNoMatter: If only our son could be more like you.
YoungestCamorrista: rude
YoungestCamorrista: i guess this is my life now
Thing 1: Wait, Ronnie and Maiza are a couple?
ReadingPoe: Yes.
Bergameister: yea
Just Ennis: Yep!
WellNoMatter: Where have you been that you didn't know that?
ReadingPoe: Well, you two aren't exactly open about it.
YoungestCamorrista: dont encourage them to be more gay
Thing 2: What's wrong with being happy? :)
YoungestCamorrista: oh you know what i meant. gay, as in homosexual, as in what they are
Thing 2: Oh. Well, they can be gay if they want to, right?
YoungestCamorrista: yes but they cant be like super gay
TheBookkeeper: Just because of that, we're going to kiss in public now
WellNoMatter: Are you being petty?
TheBookkeeper: Yes I am, but only to spite our son
YoungestCamorrista: STOP CALLING ME UR SON
ReadingPoe: I have a feeling this is going to be a very eventful chat.