Peter sat at the kitchen table, waiting, waiting…

He was waiting for Sirius, James and two other Order members. His apartment had been turned into a safe-house. They were supposed to have arrived an hour before, and they hadn't done so. He was getting nervous. If something happened to them…

There was a series of resounding cracks right outside the kitchen. Peter tried to get up, but he was so relieved he couldn't move. James, Sirius and Benjy Fenwick came into the small room, looking extremely exhausted.

"Where's Edgar?" asked Peter.

None of them would reply. James took a glass from the table and filled it with water using an Aguamenti Charm. Sirius sat down on a chair and leaned back as far as the chair could go. Benjy wiped his wand with a napkin.

"Well?" asked Peter anxiously, not entirely sure he wanted to know now that they were skirting the issue.

"He's dead," said Benjy, and he carefully placed his wand on the table.

Peter stared at him, speechless. "Dead?" he whispered finally.

"Yes," answered Benjy. "Dead."

Peter couldn't say anything. Dead. The word sounded alien to him. Edgar had been at his apartment just two days before. He had had dinner there, eaten pasta salad and drunk wine. He couldn't be dead. He just couldn't be, and Peter made the mistake of speaking his thought aloud.

"HE'S DEAD!" shouted Benjy, and he took up his wand and walked out of the room.

James had been rinsing his glass. He came and sat down next to Peter. "Don't take his anger to heart, Peter. Benjy and Edgar were close."

"Classmates," continued Sirius. "Went to Hogwarts in the same year, and now he just found out Edgar's dead. His whole family's dead."

"Whole family," mumbled Peter. "Dead." He rolled the word in his mouth as though trying to make out its taste. "Where's Remus?" he asked abruptly.

"Full moon," replied Sirius.

"And we aren't there with him," said Peter. "He's alone. We've abandoned him."

"No, we haven't," cut in James. "We have more pressing matters on our hands, Peter. Remus can look after himself for now. He understands why we can't be with him."

Peter didn't reply. He turned towards the window, and stared at the shining orb which was clearly visible.

James shook Peter slightly. "Peter, everything's fine."

When Peter didn't answer, James shot an alarmed look at Sirius. Sirius let his chair fall on the ground. "Peter," said Sirius robustly. "This is war. You can't lose it because one of us has died. All of us knew what we were getting into, and Edgar…"

Sirius couldn't continue.

"Things have changed, haven't they?" asked Peter.

James let out an audible sigh, apparently relieved that Peter was at least speaking. "Yes," said James, "but it'll be all right as long as we stick together."

James always said those words – it'll be all right if we are together. So, Peter wondered, why was it that two minutes later, Death Eaters appeared right outside his apartment and blasted the door open? How was it that they had managed to invade their "safe-house" so easily? His room, where he used to sleep easily every night knowing that he was "safe"… Why was it that even though he was with Sirius and James and Benjy, he still felt scared? How could the three Death Eaters slash Benjy's thigh open? That was blood flowing – that was real blood; that was life they were ready to take without a second thought…Why was it that Sirius and James, his heroes, the most talented students he had known at school, had failed to prevent that from happening? Why was it that one of the Death Eaters had stopped fighting and was looking in his direction? Why couldn't he raise his wand and strike when the Death Eater was not moving? It would be so easy, but the Death Eater would then know for sure…if Peter didn't hesitate, his stand was final…and he didn't know if his stand was final…and he didn't like making decisions hastily…and he…he just wanted to be safe, but he knew he wasn't…all he knew was that he and the Death Eater kept looking at each other for an eternity until James shot a curse flying at the masked man…and Sirius had grabbed Benjy and James was rushing towards him…pulling at his arm…and then, he twisted into nothingness.

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DISCLAIMER: I am not J.. Although everything you can recognize belongs to her.