Written by Sans Amour

Enjoy )

And for those of you who haven't:

read "Life of Pi", Richard Parker is a tiger

read/watched "The Princess Bride", Inigo Montoya is a skilled Spanish Swordsman

read "Animal Farm", Napoleon is an evil pig.

Now for the disclaimer: Finny (Phineas) and Gene belong to John Knowles, Napoleon belongs to George Orwell, Richard Parker belongs to Yann Martel, and Inigo Montoya belongs to William Goldman.

True Love

Once upon a time in a magical kingdom of magicalness, there lived two best friends. Richard Parker and Finny. See, Finny used to be the Prince of all of Magical land, but the citizens of magical land found out that he was gay and they exiled him. The Land of Magic wasn't very kind and accepting.

So Finny and his darling best friend, Richard Parker, built themselves a magical castle of cotton candy in the sky. It was very lovely in their home. The outside walls were made of a dark pink colored cotton candy that tasted absolutely delicious. The inside was decorated with light blue cotton candy furniture that Richard Parker usually had to hold himself back from eating. That castle was gorgeous, and soon became the envy of all of Magic Land.

Despite Finny's wonderful home, and living with his best friend, he still wasn't happy. You see, the boy Finny was in love with was being held captive in the town of Magical Land by the very evil Napoleon. Napoleon was an evil fat little piggy that knew of Finny and Gene's secret love, and he wanted Finny's castle.

"Oh Richard parker, what am I to do?" he cried one afternoon as they sat in the background eating their biscuits and sipping lemon tea. Richard Parker just growled, expressing his discontent with Napoleon.

Finny was very sad that he had lost his lover, and could not go back to save him. The magical barriers around magic town kept him from entering again.

"That's it!" he said, standing up, dropping his cup of lemon tea on top of Richard Parker's head, who was not to pleased. "I shall get a stranger to go save Gene for me!"

Richard Parker, forgetting that his friend had just dumped tea on his head, nodded ecstatically. He was glad he had figured out a way to save his love, he hated seeing his best friend so depressed.

Finny went into the kitchen, picked up the cotton candy phone and called up his old friend Inigo Montoya.

"Inigo my good friend, I need you to save my true love!" He begged.

"True love you say? Why there is nothing greater then true love! I shall be there in an instant." And there, in an instant, he was. He had taken the rainbow express. Very fast traveling I must say.

Inigo set off to save Finny's true love, and Finny cuddled up with Richard Parker, praying for the safety of Inigo and his love. The hours passed and the clock seemed to be mocking them, the hands moving extra slow.

Around three thirty in the morning, there was a knock on the door. Finny sprinted there, and Richard Parker ran joyfully behind him. They then opened the door. It was not what they expected. Why, it was Napoleon!

"I have defeated your friend! And I will never give up your love, unless you give up what is most precious too you." said Napoleon evilly, and Finny gasped and threw his arms around Richard Parker.

"Oh no! You wish to take Richard Parker way from me, don't you?" He cried. Richard Parker looked horrified. The thought of living with that revolting animal frightened and sickened him to no extent. He vomited at Napoleons feet.

Napoleon looked down, thoroughly pissed off. "Ugh! Of course not you fool! YOUR CASTLE!" He exclaimed, "It is your lovely castle I wish for!"

Finny let go of Richard Parker, and Richard Parker look very relived. "Oh? My castle? Is that all you wish for? Fine! Take it, if it means getting I'll be getting my Geney-poo back." He said happily.

So Napoleon took Finny and Richard Parker to see Gene. Gene and Finny embraced and the three of them lived happily ever after together in an even larger castle made of oatmeal cookies.
Later that night it rained, and Napoleon's newly acquired cotton candy castle melted away in the night. Just shows that gross, ugly, little piggies never win. Finny and Gene later went on to get married and live happily ever after.

It turned out that Napoleon had learned from his cousin, Chuckles the Silly piggy, how to hypnotize people and he had done that to the council of Magic Land. That was why Finny had been exiled. They later made him the Prince again.

Oh, what a happy story!