A/N: Sooooo… I know that I owe you chapter 24 of ATG, and I'll deliver it soon. I promise! The wedding is an integral part of the story! But for now, I'm delivering you some CrissColfer! Song used 'I Can't Make You Love Me' by Bonnie Raitt. I've been sitting on this story for almost a week. So…enjoy!
Chris Colfer looked across the makeshift cafeteria and sighed. He thought things would be different between him and the co-star he was staring at. They'd shared a kiss, and Chris thought it had been a turning point for them. A giant turning point, but here they were instead, playing this cat and mouse game with each other. Chris broke away from his gaze before the other man had looked up at him. He groaned loudly, and stood up, stalking away from his friends and throwing the contents of his tray in the trash can. But what he didn't know was that those hazel-green eyes were trained on him as he left.
Darren Criss sighed loudly and tried to listen to what Chord Overstreet was saying to him, but he couldn't. His eyes had trained on the tall man who walked out of the makeshift catering area. His mind was still rattled with thoughts of the kiss they'd shared the previous week.
"Dare, dude…hello? Where did you go?"
Chord asked Darren. Darren shook his head and smiled politely at Chord. He knew that he needed to sit down with Chris and talk about what was happening between them, but it had to be discreet. Darren finished up his chicken alfredo and smiled at Chord.
"I'm sorry dude, I've got some shit on my mind. Show this weekend and everything."
"I understand. I've heard you in your trailer, you rehearsing something new?"
Darren nodded. He'd been listening to the song a lot since he and Chris had kissed. He felt that it summed up his feelings. He knew how he felt for Christopher, but he needed Chris to know. He hadn't realized that it was the perfect song. He excused himself from Chord and walked back to his trailer. It was time. Chris needed to know how he felt. He grabbed his guitar, made sure it was tuned and headed out to Chris's trailer. He wiped his palms off, and knocked.
Chris had been dusting. He cleaned when he was stressed out. He heard the knock on the door, and everything stopped. He walked over to the door and opened it, smiling softly at the man standing on the other end.
"Hey Dare."
"Hey Chris. Can I come in?"
"You know you don't have to ask."
Chris said, smiling. Darren smiled back and walked into Chris's trailer. He'd noticed the cleaning products out. He knew that Chris cleaned when he was stressed. He sat down on the sofa that was in the corner of his trailer. He strummed the guitar and smiled at Chris.
"Christopher, will you come sit down with me? I have something I need to say."
Chris put down his sponge and dried his hand on a towel. He walked over to the sofa where Darren was sitting and watched Darren's face. It was impassive, and that made Chris nervous.
"So, what do you have to say?"
"That kiss, it did something to me. I don't know what to do. I can't sleep. I can't eat. I can't do anything. And then I heard this song. And this song sums up how I feel. Because I feel like this is the emotion you have for me. And I can't handle that. I need you Chris…but I feel like you're pulling away. And this song, which I'm debuting this weekend, sums it up."
Darren said, strumming on the guitar, and the opening chords shocked Chris. Because he knew this song. This was one of his favorite songs, and Darren knew it. Darren could feel the tears welling up in his eyes, and he'd wanted the tears to come later. Darren sniffled, and started singing.
"Turn down the lights;
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices
Inside my head
Lay down with me;
Tell me no lies
Just hold me close;
Don't patronize
Don't patronize me"
Chris sighed. He knew what Darren was going to tell him. He knew that Darren was in love with him, but he needed Darren to know his heart too. He needed to sing this song with Darren, to make him see that this was exactly how he felt about Darren, and not how Darren felt about Chris. So Chris picked up the chorus of the song, meeting Darren's gaze.
"'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't.
You can't make your heart feel
Something it won't.
Here in the dark
In these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
But you won't
No you won't
'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't."
Darren could see it in Chris's eyes. The love that had shone deeply for him. Darren wanted the love from Chris, he swore he did. But he didn't know if he loved Chris the same way that Chris loved him. He needed Chris like a drug, though. That he knew. And the kiss had fucked up his entire world. He'd felt something. Sure, they'd kissed several times, but mostly as Blaine and Kurt. Never as Darren and Chris. But he wasn't sure about his thoughts. He stroked Chris's hand softly, then continued playing and started singing the next verse.
"I'll close my eyes
Then I won't see
The love you don't feel
When you're holding me
Morning will come
And I'll do what's right
Just give me till then
To give up this fight
And I will give up this fight"
Darren started to cry, when he noticed that Chris was. He knew that his feelings were a little more intense now. They were starting to run deeper. More deeper than Chris would ever know. He knew singing this song would stir up emotions in him, because it was such an emotional song, but he didn't realize that it would be this bad. He needed to get through this song, and they needed to talk about things. Darren finished playing, as Chris finished out the chorus.
"'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't
You can't make your heart feel
Something it won't
Here in the dark
In these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I'll feel the power
But you won't
No you won't
'Cuz I can't make you love me
If you don't."
Darren finished the song and lay his guitar on the little coffee table in front of them. He turned and looked at Chris and then no words were spoken. Chris leaned in and kissed him again, and this time, Darren couldn't find it in himself to push away. Darren could feel all the love that Chris had for him in that kiss. After a few minutes, Darren pulled away.
"I just…need time, Chris. You understand?"
He asked. Chris nodded, and stood up to put some distance between him and Darren. Darren looked at his watch. He was late for the sound check for the Apocalyptour. Julia was going to hang him by his balls for sure. He was sure his cell phone had been vibrating during that performance, but he didn't care. He stood up, grabbed his guitar, and walked over to Chris, kissing him, and stroking his cheek softly, before heading out. Once he got outside of Chris's trailer, he turned back and looked at the door, he whispered to himself.
"I love you, Christopher."
And dashed to his car, knowing he needed to deal with this. And Chris was inside, sobbing like a baby, holding himself together, knowing that Darren would never love him.
"I love you, Darren."