This is probably the worst thing that has ever happened to Kaoru. Her and her adoptive sisters' adoptive father decided that the best move for the company he runs is marrying her and her stepsisters to the sons of a different company's CEO to "seal their companies' partnership for good", as he put it. Kaoru didn't know who paired them, but she was pissed off. Momoko was going to marry Brick, Miyako was marrying Boomer and Kaoru was marrying Butch. Momoko wasn't very happy, but she didn't complain, as their father promised them that if after a year they're unhappy with their husbands, they're free to go, as long as one of them is still married to Mojo Jojo's sons. Luckily, Boomer Jojo happened to be Miyako's boyfriend. Kaoru thanked heavens for that. What she wasn't thankful for was the fact that they paired her with Butch, her biggest enemy. He always seemed to be better at everything in school. Not by a lot, but enough to make her annoyed. Just when she thought she was free from the Jojo's, Miyako announced that she is dating Boomer. Not that she didn't like him, he just came over often and talked to them about his two brothers' shenanigans. It was mainly about Butch, though. He told them how Butch is always pissed off, and how he scares off anyone who's interested in him. Boomer considered the fact that he may be aromantic or asexual, but Butch vigorously denied that he is by telling him who exactly he's interested in, and telling how that girl would "most likely laugh at him, be disgusted, or just straight up cut (his) dick off". Kaoru immediately wanted to tell the girl, but Boomer always went silent whenever they asked him about that girl's name, saying that Butch would skin him alive if he found out.
That's why Kaoru wasn't happy about the choice for her. Not that she would be happy with Brick, he's the type of person that if you don't talk to him about anything "intellectual" (or whatever the fuck) or can't keep up a conversation with him, he most likely will tell you to fuck off and not talk to him. Luckily, Momoko is able to keep that kind of conversations with people. But contrary to Brick's bullshit, she's not stuck up and can talk casually as well, meaning she'll most likely be the savior of every person Brick will try to talk to.
Kaoru decided that she'll do the whole ordeal, under two conditions. 1. That the trial period will be shortened to a week. 2. This won't be called a marriage. Her dad waited with the response until he could call the Jojo's. Her dad approved, under the condition that they have to spend the first day doing everything together (apart from the obvious bathroom needs), and that the whole trial period will last a month. No working either. Kaoru cringed, but agreed.
Boomer and Miyako weren't legally married, but they got rings, a ceremony and so on, just to see if they feel better as husband and wife or just boyfriend and girlfriend. Momoko, Brick and Butch all decided to agree with Kaoru's terms. Well, Momoko agreed because she didn't really have anything to say. Brick just wanted to get the whole thing over with as quickly as possible. Butch shrugged at everything, according to her dad.
And so here they sat. On the couch, apart from each other. The silence was very awkward between Kaoru and Butch. He seemed stiff and annoyed too. Normally, she'd just try to cope with it by completely ignoring Butch and play games or watch that series she didn't have time to finish earlier. But her dad knew that this would happen, so the first day is electronics-free. Shit, might as well try to be nice to the asshole.
"So… Uh…" She started awkwardly.
"What?" He snapped.
"Jeez, who pissed in your cereal?" She muttered. Even if he heard it, he sure as hell didn't let her know that. "Well… I just thought that you know… We could talk to kill time." She coughed and said. 'Well, this is fucking awkward.' She thought. Kaoru glanced at Butch. He changed from the kid with a buzzcut, crooked teeth and bruises that she always made on his face. He was actually nice to look at now. He also happened to sport long hair, which was her favorite. If not for the piled up hate she had for him, she may have considered him hot. She shook her head at that disgusting thought. Butch seemed more tense than a second ago. Kaoru sighed.
"I know that I'm not as pretty as Momoko and I don't have Miyako's charm, and I may have annoyed the fuck out of you in school, but that's no reason to not talk to me. I mean we can't kill time in any other ways, at least today." Kaoru turned to Butch. 'Good job Kaoru, be as nice as possible, maybe he won't try to be such a major dickwad this way.' She thought.
Butch muttered something, but Kaoru missed it completely, lost in her own thoughts. She blinked a few times.
"Did you say something?" Kaoru asked. Butch grunted disapprovingly. She sighed. Butch's stomach started to growl. 'Maybe if I feed him, he'll stop being a total douche?' Kaoru thought. "I'll order something. Any preference?" She asked, but Butch just turned away. "Jesus, okay fine, you don't like me, but do you really have to be such a dick?" She rolled her eyes. She looked around for the phone in silence until she remembered. No electronic devices. Including phones. Meaning either of them has to cook today. Butch may poison her, and she never really had the need to learn how to cook. Luckily for her, there was a cookbook on the counter. Following directions is easy, right? She decided to make stew. Kaoru put an apron on, and decided to chop the ingredients and just do whatever feels right, mostly neglecting the cookbook in the process. After a bit of time, she was all done, but… The stew looked very unappetising. And smelled like pineapples and old moldy cheese. Which was odd, considering she didn't add either of those ingredients. She felt a little brave and ate a spoon. It tasted like cheap instant noodles and her old gym socks. She gagged. 'Fuck. I'll have to do it again. If he eats this, my ass will a 100% be murdered. I'll just go to the bathroom for a second to scrub my entire tongue and get back to it.' She thought. Kaoru sighed and walked to the bathroom.
She walked out of the bathroom to see that Butch sat on the sofa with the expression of a man who's about to die. Kaoru walked to the kitchen to throw away the questionable stew and start again, this time following instructions closer. Upon arrival, she noticed that the pot was where she left it, but the stew itself was gone. That dumbass Butch ate the entire stew. Kaoru started to sweat. 'R.I.P. my ass. You have served me well.' She hurried to Butch.
"Why'd you eat it?!" Kaoru yelled, starting to panic.
"You made it for me right? So I ate it." Butch's tone was quite unusually nonchalant, considering the fact that his face showed a lot of pain. He stood up, and calmly walked to the toilet, closing the door. A second later, Kaoru very clearly heard him throwing everything right up. Kaoru stood there, frozen, until Butch opened the door, looking normal, and calmly sat back down on the sofa.
"Are you a complete dumbass?" Kaoru asked Butch after she unfroze. Butch was silent.
"You know what? I'm going to sleep. You can crash on the couch. You know where the blankets are." Kaoru said, went to the only bedroom and slammed the door shut. She didn't even change, she just threw herself on the bed and fell asleep nearly instantly.
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"Butch..." Kaoru moaned softly as his lips slowly explored her body. He raised his head slightly, but enough for her to see the smirk that she loves to see on his handsome face. He neared his face to hers, capturing her lips in a kiss. "Butch… Come on, you're still fully dressed." She looked at his body, stopping at his crotch for a second, before meeting his eyes. He just smirked at her again.
"Not yet, my Buttercup." He brought his hands to the hems of her boyshorts and slowly, agonizingly, took them off. He brought his face to her crotch and gave a quick, teasing lick to her clit. Kaoru pouted. Butch grinned. "How much do you want me?"
"Very." Kaoru's answer was short. She was getting quite impatient. Butch smiled at her, before continuing to lick her with his surprisingly skillful tongue. She moaned his name again and again. Her breath quickened simultaneously with his tongue. She was near her climax, and she instinctively grabbed Butch's head. She cried out his name as her grip on his hair tightened. Butch raised his head and backed off a little bit for Kaoru to see most of his body, including his very obvious erection.
"Now we can get to the fun part." He grinned yet again as he unbuckled his belt, freeing his coc…
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Kaoru jumped out of the bed, completely red, falling with her face straight on the floor. "What the fuck did I add to that stew?" She muttered to herself as she got up and rubbed her nose. She looked at her underwear to see if this… "nightmare" "affected" her. Her fears proved to be true. Her boyshorts were soaking. She was legitimately excited to fuck Butch? That stew was definitely dangerous. What's worse, Butch might have heard her voice. He can't get the wrong idea. He would never forget this and will very likely make fun of her whenever he sees her. 'Could've been worse,' she thought 'at least Butch isn't half bad in the looks department.' She widened her eyes at her conclusion. What is she thinking? He's one of the worst people she ever met! She can't be attracted to him. Anyone but him. Cautiously, she opened the door and creeped up to the sofa. He was sleeping soundly. She let out a breath of relief. Looking closer, she saw something she would want to unsee. Butch's morning wood under the blankets. Her cheeks went apple red. But… She was a little bit curious. Her dream broke off before she could see it. She grinned, thinking that it's probably micro-sized. 'No, what the fuck is wrong with you, just go back to the bedroom.' She thought to herself. She stood there for a while. Then, Kaoru touched his arm. He didn't even stir. She then squeezed it. He turned his head, but otherwise there was no reaction. She delicately lifted the blanket. He was in his underwear. Kaoru started to sweat. She grabbed the hem of his underwear and slowly pulled it down. 'Huh, he shaves?' She thought as she pulled low enough to see the base of his dick. Then, Butch shifted. 'ABORT, T' Kaoru thought as she hastily draped the covers back on Butch and dashed at top speed to the bedroom. She rested her back against the door, her heart beating so fast and hard that she wondered if other people would be able to hear it. She decided to wait until he wakes up.
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"You could at least put some pants on." Kaoru grunted.
"This apartment is my home for a month. This is how I usually dress at my regular home." Butch grunted as he ate his cereal. He frowned at the bowl, deciding that he needs more cereal. He stood up, slowly striding to the kitchen. Kaoru absentmindedly looked at him, and accidentally gave his ass a good long stare. She nearly choked on her own spit. 'He's my enemy, why does his ass have to be perfect?' She thought in horror. Butch got back to the sofa with a fresh bowl of cereal. Good thing they finally got electronics back. She could distract herself with whatever was on tv. Except she still stared at Butch, specifically at him waist down. Luckily, he never caught her looking. She shook her head and watched whatever bad sitcom was on.
"Why are you sweating so much? You're red too. Don't tell me you have a cold?" Butch scooted away quickly. Kaoru was surprised at how much he just said at once.
"No, I'm just thinking about this embarrassing nightmare." Kaoru muttered. Butch sat in silence for a second.
"You walked around in town nude?" Butch tried to guess what was the dream about. Kaoru furrowed her brows. "You lost a match? You were in one of those weird chick flick scenarios? Disturbing wet dream?" Kaoru widened her eyes. Butch grinned. "Jackpot." He set his bowl down and scooted closer. "So, who was it about? Someone famous? Someone you know?" He scooted closer with each sentence. "Perhaps…" He was now close to her ear. "Was it me?" Butch murmured in her ear. She went red and cringed.
"As if." She said, her voice shaking. Butch smirked and rested his hand on her lower thigh.
"You know, I…" He grabbed her chin with his other hand. "... Would never do that to you. Ever. Have you seen yourself in the mirror?" He let go of her entirely, scooting back to his spot. He closed his eyes and cringed, but Kaoru didn't notice. Kaoru got up and started stripping down to her underwear angrily. "What the fuck are you doing?"
"This is how I usually dress. You shouldn't have any problems, since I'm so ugly, right?" Kaoru scowled at Butch. He rolled his eyes.
"Alright, I'll go put some pants on." Butch said as he stood up.
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"I'm going out with Boomer and Brick." Butch said as he passed Kaoru. "We'll be drinking."
"Look at all the fucks I don't give." Kaoru answered.
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Kaoru woke up at the sound of the front door doorknob being turned. She hesitantly got up and walked to the front door. It wasn't opening, it was just making unnecessary noise. She opened the door to see a drunk Butch leaning against the doorframe. He immediately fell into Kaoru's arms. She stumbled a bit. She closed the door with her foot and led/carried Butch to the bed. She cringed and pulled his shoes and pants off. Before she could leave, Butch pulled her to him. She fell on the bed next to him. Butch hugged her tight, making her unable to leave. Fuck.
"Let go, dick." Kaoru tried to push him away.
"I will, if you give me a kiss" He muttered. Kaoru rolled her eyes and kissed his forehead. "Not here." Butch pouted. "Here." He grabbed her chin to keep her face in one place and kissed her lips. "Like that."
"Let go now, then." Kaoru struggled.
"Nope. I kissed you, not the other way around."
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A/N: Alright, so this needs a bit of an explanation. After my most recent one shot, I attempted to make a comeback with a new story, I assume. I remember being dissatisfied with the stories I already had going. I thought they were ridiculous, cringy and uninteresting, and for good reason. I was 12 when I created that concept, maybe 11. That's right, I was a little snot-nosed baby. Probably obvious in my writing. I really dislike the stories I wrote and I won't continue them, just because they make me physically cringe (because they remind me that I was… a pretty big weeaboo). They'll be up for good times' sake, though. I didn't even want to rewrite them (I still don't), so I wrote two intros to two new stories, this is one of them, probably the better written one. This was last edited in august 2016, just after I turned 17, but I believe I begun writing this when I was still 16, so it was around the time I started moving on from my weeb phase and started my edgelord phase. So, while writing this, I was a weeb edgelord. (A weeblord? An edgeweeb?) The fact that I was a big weeb made me change my username to something I don't actively use as a nickname (Not my original, the one right before the newest one) so that my friends wouldn't find my fics.
This concept is… so dang ridiculous, and convoluted (the intro is so awkward and desperate to explain the concept I half-made, half-borrowed). I know. I think I read a manga with a similar concept but i was so dissatisfied with the male character, how the plot was progressing, how and when it ended. I think it's fairly obvious that this is lifted off from a weird ass manga concept. (So I guess this is technically a confusing crossover, except no characters from that story show up in this fic?)
This was also around when I started swearing more liberally, and I kind of like this style. It's… Interesting. Don't think it sounds quite like me anymore, but it's interesting. I laughed at my own jokes here and there, how sad is that?
And GOD that "smut" scene. It's not as bad as my previous attempts, but… Is this working? Like, on anybody? I find it a bit awkward, but that's maybe because I found and read this while at school. It's on Google Docs (like anything I write on the go with no computer), so to top it all off I wrote it on the bus with my phone. Who am I, E. L. James?
But, strangely, I could possibly see myself continuing this (I actually remember bits and pieces of how I wanted to continue the last scene and some lines from the day after). Just for shits and giggles. That doesn't mean that I'd write it parody-style, I'd actually attempt to make it somewhat seem serious, but not nearly as serious as I was when I initially started. But since it's not a passion project, just something I'd like to see having an end, I'd be updating it only whenever I actually feel like I have an idea, unlike last time where I desperately tried to write as much and as often as possible, it actually creatively burned me out.
Anyway, ramble over.
Thoughts?