This is what happened to me at the age of 10...
The pain was unbearable. It was like the world was saying 'your life is spiralling down anyway might as well go down with it'. But I wanted to live like they were still alive, I wanted to grow up to be a person they are proud of, a person that they would never forget. As I lay there on my bed as the fat tears rolled down my cheeks, sobs escaped my lips. My heart was broken into a thousand pieces and I didn't think I could fix it. Waves of agony and frustration crashed into me.
"Why did you have to go? Why won't this hurt go away?" I cry into the still air. I knew no one would answer but I wanted to put the question out into the world, even though I didn't expect an answer.
This is my life now at the age of 15...
OK, new school, new town, but no new me. After five years of foster care and different versions of my body and mind. But now I am in a small town called Amity Park and I won't change, no I will be who I was when my parents were alive. I will be Samantha Manson, a girl with amethyst eyes and raven hair that falls around my shoulders, a Goth, a recyclo –vegetarian and foster child. I have been an emo, loner, geek, techno geek (I was never really good at that one), popular or trend setter (that one cost a lot of money).
After my parents death I inherited everything. And I do mean everything. The money, the house and the company. But I was only ten so I couldn't live in the house by myself and I couldn't run the company. So I spent some of the money making the house into a school for children with all types of disabilities. I had to sell the company to the highest bidder, who was happy to pay over $25 million for. But that gave more money (a much bigger amount than I spent to develop the house for the children) so I decided to give just less than half to charity. All sorts of charities! Cancer research, animal rights, animal shelters, homeless shelters, child abuse clinics, all the charities you can think of that is where my money went.
But I still had money so I kept some and then put the rest in a large bank account for future investments (such as collage). Even though I have done all this I am still a parentless teenager in a foster home, in a small town know for the supernatural. Lucky me...
"Sam! Get your little butt down here! You don't want to be late for your first day!" Lenore shoats.
Lenore is my rock. My big algae covered rock. If rocks have deep coffee toned skin, almond slanted eyes in the colour of melted dark chocolate, dreadlocks the colour of honey that reach her waist and a foster child worker, then yes she is the biggest rock of the bunch. A rock that could pummel me to a pulp if I was late for my first day at Casper High School.
"OK, I will be down in a second!" I call back.
Lacing up my combat boots I walk over to my full length Victorian mirror. I see my odd coloured eyes with thick lashes, black eyeliner and raven hair but then all I see is a stranger. A girl with high sculpted check bones, thin arched eyebrows, milky skin with a pink hue in the checks and a mouth painted purple (to match my eyes) in the shape of an arches bow. My once non-curvy body, is now in the shape on a hour glass. My black crop top with a purple skull on it does justice to my well developed chest and flat stomach. My black mini skirt with purple leggings make my legs look five miles long (I am 5ft 8inchs anyway and the thick sole of my combats help).
I smile shakily at the angelic stranger trapped behind the glass and take a deep breath.
"You can do this Sam, you can do this!" I chant to myself. This might not be so bad...
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The rusting SUV sputters to a wheezing stop outside of a school that looks as if it is falling to pieces. 'Don't judge a book by it cover, Sammykins.' My mom would chirp at me in a way that would make my blood boil and make me snarl at her but now I miss her so much it hurts. The waves of agony wash over me, drowning me in sorrow. I miss you mom. But this book looks like it needs a new coat of paint and remodel.
"You ready to rock that school Sam?" Jokes Lenore.
"Hmmm, just as much as I am ready to bathe in acid rain." I reply.
"Aww, Sam. Give it a chance. It might even surprise you." She giggles and prods mu knee with one long hot pink talon from the driver's seat.
"Great, now I need to burn my leggings..." I mumble. I hate pink!
"Bye, now Sam!" She says in an overly excited voice.
"If only you weren't twenty-five, you could go through this torture with me," I groan as I slip out of the car and into the golden sun, letting her old fingers caress my skin reassuringly.
"Yeah, if only. Ha, but I always did hate high school!" Lenore Shoats as she squeals out of the parking lot.
As I stood there on the curb, butterflies dance around in my stomach. I walk to the stairs in what feels like slow motion; my limbs feel as if they are made of cement. When I finally reach the door I take a deep breath through my mouth and push open the doors.
So this is what hell looks like...
I am swept up in a mass of teens gossiping about a so-called 'Danny Phantom'.
This is going to be a long day...