A Matter of Trust
Honestly, she wasn't sure what compelled her to go through this routine once every few days. It was so strict and unchanging she'd have thought she was suffering from obsessive-compulsive disorder if she didn't know better. "Better" meaning that right now, Emma could be plotting against her, and Regina had to do everything in her power to prevent that.
Even though she had known long ago, the painful stab of a knife in her chest still struck her speechless as she read the words written on a bright piece of paper that lay in Emma's drawer in a fearful whisper. See you again tonight! xoxo ~Ruby
Fuming, Regina slammed the drawer closed, crumbled the filthy piece of paper and stormed off, not even bothering to take the damn car, to Granny's. Everything about her screamed get the hell out of my way or get ready to die and so most customers politely excused themselves as soon as the doorbell's tingle interrupted their evening chatter. Just in time, too, because the first thing Regina came face to face with was Emma Swan having a hearty laugh at something unbelievably stupid Ruby said - the same Ruby who was sitting across the table from her girlfriend, with her red streaked hair and her sorry excuse for panties, er, shorts, and her pouty lips and ugh and god damn Regina if she shouldn't have crushed both of their hearts right away and spared herself all this unwanted nonsense.
As she inspected Emma's face, eyes widening in horror when realization hit the spot, Regina realized she couldn't do it. She couldn't kill her heart's heart.
But she could, most definitely, watch life seep from another.
Composing herself, she hissed, "We are done, Miss Swan." She threw a hard look at Ruby that made the waitress want to shrink in her seat and die spontaneously. "Done."
Regina was starting to turn away when a voice stopped her dead in her tracks. She would have ignored it if it were the voice she was hoping for. It wasn't.
"Wait, Regina, listen, I can explain!"
"What is there to explain?" Regina snapped, turning around swiftly to see the two people up on their feet with Ruby in the lead, looking at her with the same fear in her eyes that the then-seven year old Henry had had when his mother had found pieces of a porcelain vase lying scattered on the carpet. On the contrary, Emma didn't show any signs of guilt, remorse or the much preferred terror, which struck Regina speechless. No, strangely enough, Emma kept looking her right in the eye, lips pursed in a straight line, like she had every god damn right to - which she did not.
In the end, it was the fact that Henry had been innocent that made her listen.
"I-It was a stupid idea—I never thought you would actually fall for it," Ruby stuttered and immediately regretted her word choice when Regina's eyes narrowed at the word fall. "I just—I thought Emma was overreacting so I—We bet—"
"Start making sense!" Regina commanded, effectively silencing her rambling.
Ruby took a deep breath and started over. "Emma was here one night, drinking, and, and I noticed she was feeling down so—" Regina rubbed the bridge of her nose; she knew exactly where this was going. "So I asked her what was wrong and she told me you guys were dating." Yes, yes, now get to the point. Regina would have normally been bothered by the fact that Emma disclosed their secret relationship, but at the moment, this was the least of her worries. "She said you didn't trust her."
Regina blinked. Once, twice, to make sure she wasn't imagining things. "What?"
"She said you were always going through her stuff to see if she was cheating on you, so, so uh, I had the idea to plant that letter in there, just, because we, we bet," Ruby finished, oblivious to how downright stupid that excuse sounded. What came next was but a whisper. "I thought you wouldn't do that."
"Why should I trust you?" Regina asked.
That was when Emma decided to intervene, stepping in front of Ruby as if to try to protect her from the daggers Regina was throwing. Despicable. "That's exactly what I asked her. Because you don't, Regina. You never do."
The next thing to surprise Regina was the watery glimmer in Emma's eyes and suddenly, she felt less like the victim and more like the criminal, which was absurd. She frowned.
Emma threw her arms in the air. "So decide. Either believe all the times I proclaimed my love for you were a lie, or get it through that thick skull of yours that the one letter you found was. I don't care anymore, because you don't trust me and I don't even know what I'm doing here." There was something resembling the first thunder before a giant storm in the undertone to her voice, venomous and much more daring than usual; much more like Regina herself.
Ruby was just about ready to die.
Now, Regina could put two and two together. Emma could have just been trying to make her feel guilty, so that she'd think this whole affair is in some preposterous way her fault. Emma could have been making up an excuse to make her doubt herself, certainly. But if she were, wouldn't she storm out and leave Regina and Ruby alone to eat themselves alive, putting an end to the relationship before Regina could to avoid public contempt? Instead, Emma's feet stayed firmly in place, her eyes calmly awaiting Regina's next move - not pleading. Not angry. Not scared. Not mischievous, either. Waiting. Waiting while the whole world stopped to think for a minute - a minute that was perhaps way too long, but a minute that Regina needed.
Because you don't trust me.
Regina closed her fingers around the crumbled piece of paper in her coat pocket. This woman not only stole her town and her son and her heart, but now she was asking Regina to willingly give her her trust, too. In exchange for… what exactly?
A single tear rolled over Regina's cheek. "I'm sorry," she whispered to no one in particular, knowing she had been this close to committing yet one more thing she would regret forever. Rage? Gone, replaced by emptiness because she refused to fill the hole with debt.
Emptiness and then hope when Emma wrapped her arms around Regina's neck, pulling her into a tight hug. "Thank you," she said, watching Ruby wink at her before disappearing on the staircase in the back.