Hi everyone! This is for the Starvation March 2012 prompt: Insanity. I hope you like it, and go check out the forum!
He can feel the mutts, ripping at his skin. Briefly, he wonders how he managed to screw up this much. But that thought is pushed away as he struggles to get back on the the cornucopia, and kill the stupid loves from twelve. That is, after all, what he's good at. Killing children and not looking back, that is.
He can see her smile, eyes shining and hair blowing around her face. She's laughing, and he is too. She's the only one he laughs around, the only one he cares for even a little bit. She stops laughing, only to start again when he mutters "Turtle.". She's trying to slap him, but before she can, he moves away.
He never thought he, a Career, would be killed by a rat from 12. It's almost funny, that he would suffer the same fate as his best friend. Still, he doesn't want to die. He wants to make them pay. He hates every part of them, their silly lovers act and her talent with a bow. He hates that he was outscored by her, and shown up by him. They should be dead already, and he should be the Victor.
He remembers how she never held a grudge. He would be pissed off one second, and perfectly cheerful the next. That was how they became friends, through arguments and insults. It was a strange way to become friends, but then again, they were strange people. They would fight when they were friends, but it was a different type of fighting. One of friendship, and petty insults. One of her favorites was "Go die in a hole", and she used it more that necessary.
He wonders if Lover Boy knows she's faking. Probably not, he isn't too smart after all. He knows what love is-contrary to popular belief- and she doesn't love him. Sure, he supposes she'd feel guilty if he died, but her eyes are empty when she looks at him. They're cold, hard, and gray. Like stone, he decides, the kind of stone you find buried a hundred feet under ground. He hates how empty they look, because they remind him of dead things- dead people. Just one more reason he hates her, he supposes.
She didn't believe in love. It was, in many ways, a foreign concept to her. He didn't like love either. It was a weakness, and they both hated being weak. She still had feelings, happiness, and anger, and joy, but it wasn't the same. She never trusted anyone with the power to break her. She was stone cold when she needed to be, and as warm as the sun the rest of the time. He remembered she loved to laugh, and did so often. It was a sign of friendship more than a sign of love.
The mutts don't leave him alone. They look like the tributes, all the ones he killed and all the ones he was allied with. There's Marvel, glaring at him as he tries to get away. The girls from 8, 10, and 3 circle him like wolves. They scratch at his stomach, right where he stabbed them. Then, he sees the Glimmer mutt. It looks like her, the same blond hair and the same eyes. It's almost disturbing.
He remembers her hair was blond. It actually was a gold color, but she said it was blond. Her eyes were ocean colored, blue, green, yellow, and brown. They swirled in the light, different colors every day. She hated the way she looked, although he thought she was pretty. Honestly, she never saw herself the way others did. It was almost funny to him, she really underestimated herself.
He looked back up at lover boy and the fire girl. She was saying something to him, unaffected by his screams. He wonder if she ever cried. Probably not, she was cold as ice. It was almost inhuman, how she could kill without a second thought. Looking back, she had killed pretty much everyone he allied with. Glimmer and that girl from four, Marvel (Although he did kill her ally) and Clove-in a way. He hated her for that.
She never cried. If she was bleeding, she would calmly wrap it up and go get help. It was really creepy, how she could bleed a ton and not freak out at all. He always admired that about her, she was tough. "A doctor in the making" he would say, and get a slap in return. He only saw her cry once, when her parents called her worthless, and kicked her out. She had cried as she tried to tell him, and then didn't speak for a month. She was, for all intents and purposes, a mental Avox. It scared him more than he would admit.
He was bleeding a lot now, the body armor ripped to shreds. He wondered why they didn't just kill him already, there was no way he could win. Of course, the audience needed a good show. They sickened him, every last one of them. He never thought about how barbaric it was, all that mattered was winning and becoming famous. It seemed rather pointless now.
She ranted a lot. About anything, the games, people at school, her parents. He would listen sometimes, but mostly he would tune her out. She didn't care really, it was just to let off steam. She called him an idiot a lot, when he was training and when he was boasting about how he would win. One time, she hid all his weapons and tied him to his chair. He really hated her, although sometimes he liked her.
The mutts left him, finally. He groaned, and there was movement on the horn. Fire Girl and Lover Boy peered over the side at him. There were some whispers as they wondered why he wouldn't die. He wanted to tell them to just kill him, to go home and be victors. He couldn't move though, so he just whispered one word. "Please." she understood, and fired an arrow. He heard the cannon shot, and he heard her voice, "About time loser, I was beginning to think you weren't going to get on with it."
He remembered her death vividly. She was lying, broken, cuts and bruises decorating her frail body. There was a crimson river flowing from the cuts, and her eyes were blank, dead. He wanted her to be faking, like she did all the time at home. She wasn't though, because when she was faking she would hold back giggles and her eyes would shift ever so slightly. She really was dead this time. Something snapped inside his mind, and the shock was replaced with anger. She never wanted to be a victor, that was his dream. It wasn't fair, that she would just die while he watched.
Maybe he was insane, he did hear her voice after all. Maybe she was right when she told him he had been dropped as a baby. Honestly, he didn't care anymore. The voice stopped him from doing anything stupid, like she did when she was still alive. It haunted him in a way, but it reminded him of why he was fighting. He would embrace insanity if it meant he could be with her again.