Warnings: Angst, OOC, AU-ish, Yaoi, Mpreg, cursing...The usual...Going to be a tad dark so don't say I didn't warn you, but also it's going to be so cute and fluffy it fucking BURNS...Also smut, warnings here if you didn't read it you're a nidiot.
Disclaimer: I own nothing right now except some comics :D
Pairing: RenoxGenesis one sided RufusxReno
AN: A fic exchange/birthday present/Valentine's present...Damn right I can kill three stones with one bird. Thanks to Nessa for a few brilliant ideas, would have been stuck without you :)
The Cycle
It had all started again. It always repeated itself, the cycle by which he lived his very life. It ruled his life as much as he fought it, as much as he hated it. But they would never know, not even Rude his partner in crime could see past the perfectly modelled façade he held in place. Only one had ever seen through it. But he was dead... Or so they thought, they had never found his body. But they had never found the body of Lazard, but Rufus still had hope that his brother was out there.
But Reno knew there was no hope for Genesis, he had been gone so long that he had found it hard to cope. Even though they rarely got the chance to spend time together with their conflicting schedules. He'd loved it when Genesis sneaked into his apartment and lay in the bed waiting for him after a long mission away.
But now he returned to his apartment alone and wanting, with only a few dozen bottle of beers awaiting him in the refrigerator. That was where he found himself that evening. On that fateful evening when he walked out that door and into his arms. He knew that Rufus had always been interested in him, especially since the man had made small attempts at getting Reno's attention the past few months. But Reno ignored it, but tonight his wanting was worse than ever. It was his and Genesis' anniversary, they would have been together 10 years today and yet he had to celebrate it alone.
But he drunkenly found his way to Rufus' quarters and threw himself at the man. Rufus took his chance to be with Reno, thinking he would never get another. How wrong he was, because after the first time Reno had felt enough guilt to drink himself stupid to end up in his quarters again and again. Rufus was happy at first until he finally spoke to Reno about it.
"Why not stay for once?" Rufus asked as Reno rose from the bed and went about collecting his clothes drunkenly.
"C-Cause I don't wanna stay...What if he comes back, yo? He could be waitin' for me right now..." Then he left half dressed and clutching a bottle of beer. Rufus had slept alone once again.
This was his life now, he'd just have to accept it.
~XXX~XXX~XXX~
Reno sat on the balcony of his apartment building smoking another cigarette while waiting for his TV dinner to cook. It wasn't that he couldn't cook, he just didn't see the point in cooking if Genesis wasn't there to tease him about aprons or how he sang to himself while he cooked and especially about how the Turk could burn cereal. A lot of things in his life had lost meaning when Genesis left.
"Dunno why I bother missing the ass hole, he's the one who ran the fuck away." Reno grumbled as he placed the cigarette back against his lips taking another drag. He stared at the lit cigarette musing over whether or not to visit Rufus tonight.
Just as he finished his cigarette and was about to turn in for the night something hit him sending him straight into the chair he had been lounging on. As he reached for his EMR a hand grabbed his wrist tightly. He looked up to see his attackers face and recognized it instantly.
"Genesis! W-What..."
Before he could question the man he took his lips in a passionate and slightly desperate kiss.
"I...Have only just awakened. The Goddess kept me as-"
"Not this fucking Goddess crap again! I don't wanna hear it, yo! Last time you started spouting crap about the Goddess you fucking left me!" Reno felt his free hand move to slap Genesis without thinking "You think I'm gonna let you come back into my life just to fuck it up, think again."
'...Wait' Reno thought to himself. 'This is the man I've been waiting for...Why am I pushing him away?'
"Reno..." Genesis began resting his own forehead against the Turks. "I have been waiting to be awakened...I've been in a slumber that was out of my control...The Goddess held me there...I wanted to return to you...I prayed everyday that I would not be too late." He reached up to stroke the soft skin on Reno's face "I was worried that I would awaken and you would have already passed on to the life-stream... But you're here...Alive, hate me all you want my love but I will not leave your side. Not unless I am forced to."
Genesis leaned forward capturing Reno's lips in his own, tasting the beer he'd been drinking. He could smell cigarettes on Reno, the same brand he'd always smoked. Upon gently sliding his tongue into Reno's mouth he felt Reno shift underneath him. His hands snaking up to Genesis' back gripping what he could of his leather coat. Genesis smelt and tasted the same as always, Banora Apples. Reno separated the kiss gasping for air while Genesis began ripping open his shirt, Reno shivered as the cold night air hit him.
"We ain't going any further out here, yo... Kinky but way too cold..."
Genesis nodded in agreement and stood back as Reno rose from the chair and lead him inside his apartment to the bedroom. It had been Reno's apartment when they first met and formed their relationship and luckily after everything that had happened in Midgar, it was still the exactly the same as it was when he last saw it. No new furniture and no drastic changes. It was almost as if he'd been away for a week.
He was shocked when he felt a hand on his chest pushing him onto the bed roughly. He looked up at Reno to see his expression had darkened slightly. His eyes held emotions he'd never seen in them before, but he recognized them from seeing them in the eyes of others. Mainly, his late and missed friend Angeal Hewley. That anger was a look Angeal gave him many times for not returning his feelings. It was the same combination of heartbreak and fury.
But on Reno it was much more terrifying.
"You ain't getting away with what you've done, yo." Reno growled as he pinned Genesis arms above his head with one hand as his free hand searched blindly for the handcuffs he knew were there. Upon locating them he captured Genesis wrists in them. "No you're mine..."
Genesis looked up in shock to see that they were wrapped around one of the metal poles which consisted of the headboard. Genesis smirked confidently knowing that he could easily get out of this position if he so wished, but maybe it was a good idea to let Reno take the reins for once.
Reno leant down kissing Genesis passionately. Genesis smirked slightly pulling back.
"You taste like an ashtray."
"You taste like dog shit, you always did have the worst morning breath, yo." Reno grinned triumphantly as he reacquainted himself with all the buckles and straps of Genesis' coat, unfastening them and throwing them across the room in record time. "Much better... I like you like this..."
Genesis resisted the urge to frown. Now was not the time for him to have a tantrum.
"You're wearing far too much, Reno..." Genesis grinned and raised his hips to grind them against Reno's.
Genesis couldn't help but stare at the look that came across Reno's face, he looked beautiful like that. Genesis couldn't help but continue grinding their hips together, wanting to stain that image into his mind forever. If he should ever leave again he wanted to be able to remember Reno like this.
"S-Stop it, Gen..." Reno finally gathered himself enough to lift himself away from Genesis and start undressing himself quickly and throw his clothes into a pile to be collected in the morning and worn again. He then yanked the drawer open in a frenzy and reached for lube and a condom, but before he had even touched them a guttural growl caught his attention.
"Don't you dare make me wait another second just fuck me, I don't care if it will hurt."
Reno smirked and slammed the drawer shut before kissing and stroking Gen.
"You always did like it rough, yo."
"Either shut up and fuck me or I break these stupid cuffs and fuck you."
Reno didn't bother continuing the banter and instead just slowly inched himself into Genesis listening to every hitch in the groans and gasps he made as he slowly filled him. He stopped for a while staring at the pained look on Genesis face, it had been so long since they'd done this together. Years that had passed by agonizingly slow for Reno and hadn't passed at all for Genesis.
"You can move now...Don't hold back."
Reno nodded unsure and pulled out until just the tip was inside Genesis and thrust in as fast as he could. The noises coming from Genesis were enough to make him spill inside Genesis there and then. But he held back biting his lip as Genesis tightened around him.
"Idiot, you make me wanna come like a fucking teenager."
"Less...Talking...More fucki-AH! THERE!"
Reno continued to pound into Genesis without thought until they were both spent. They needed this, this was the only way they'd ever known to express their feelings to each other. Reno pulled out of Genesis and reached for his cigarettes in his pants on the floor. He couldn't help but smile when he heard the noise he'd been half expecting. The same frustrated groan he always heard every time he had smoked after their love making.
"Still a nagging bitch then." Reno grinned like the bastard he was while lighting his cigarette looking to Genesis who had already crossed his arms and was frowning.
"Still a suicidal addict." He then flicked his hair in his usual arrogance glaring as hard as he could at Reno without smiling at how beautiful he looked with his hair loose and in a mess. His determined frown broke when he saw Reno's grin turn to a genuine smile.
"You're so fucking cute when you're like this you know." Reno wrapped his arm around Genesis pulling him close to his chest snuggling him. "Now go to sleep, we're both too tired to argue" He stubbed out his cigarette and looked down at Gen to see he was already half way there. Reno let a small smile play on his lips before he kissed Genesis softly on the forehead and relaxing enough to let himself fall asleep.
~XXX~XXX~XXX~
It had been three whole months of hardships for the couple. Rufus ordering Genesis to be killed for the atrocities he had committed in the past. He had dragged Rufus' own brother down in his corruption, killing him also with the pathetic attempts at regaining his whole health. Reno sighed as he remembered the argument he had with Rufus.
"HE DOES NOT DESERVE LIFE, RENO! THE DAMAGE HE CAUSED WAS ON A RIDICULOUS SCALE! WE HAVE TO KILL HIM NOW BEFORE HE PURSUES HIS MADDNESS!"
"WELL IF WE'RE GONNA GO ABOUT IT LIKE THAT, YO! WHAT ABOUT ME? I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE I KILLED WHEN I LET THAT PLATE DROP ON THE SLUMS! AND WHO ORDERED THAT YO! I DIDN'T EVEN REJECT THE ORDER ONCE I JUST FUCKING DID IT! NO SECOND THOUGHTS! IF WE'RE GONNA CHOOSE WHO LIVES AND DIES ON THAT SCALE YOU'LL HAVE TO KILL ME WITH HIM, YO!"
They stood there both seething with rage glaring at each other from across a desk. Reno saw the tears in his boss' eyes. This wasn't about Lazard, or even Genesis. This was about them, that they were over and were never to become involved again if Reno could help it. Rufus looked Reno in the eyes anger and pain still there in his own, threatening to consume him.
"Does he even know about us?"
"There was never and us, yo. Never will be. He knows I slept around, yeah. But he ain't mad. I'm clean so we're good."
Rufus simply hardened his glare pointing at his office door.
"Leave and tell Genesis he is to report to Reeve tomorrow morning, I suppose he could help train the WRO soldiers..."
The memory still pained Reno, though he'd never loved Rufus they'd still been friends. He'd cared so deeply about his boss, but they could have never been more than friends with benefits. Even though he'd always thought Genesis might never come back, he had never been able to move forward. The only thing that had changed when Genesis left was that he'd go to bars, get wasted and after time fuck Rufus and them stumble home.
But now his life was made up of a brand new cycle, a cycle he was ecstatically happy with. He'd get up in the morning with Genesis, they'd have breakfast together, he went to work, came home, had dinner with Genesis and almost every night they made love. Reno had been the cat who got the cream, grinning like a bastard day in day out.
However, for the past few morning Genesis had been throwing up and staying in bed instead of working. Reno assumed it was his cooking so he started buying TV dinners, calling for take out or just letting Genesis cook which was never as disastrous as his own cooking, thank Gaia.
But it had been weeks and it carried on, Reno couldn't stand the thought of losing Genesis when he'd only just returned to him. It kept him awake at night listening to his lover shift around uncomfortably in the early hours of the morning before bolting across the room to their bathroom to be sick. Reno couldn't keep track of how many mornings he'd been laying there listening to these sounds before he finally snapped.
"That's it. We're not doing this any more, yo! We're going to the fucking doctors up at Healin! I don't wanna hear you bitch about the price of those old bastards time, I'll cover it. Get ready to go as soon as...I'm gonna ask Rufus for the Chopper..."
He grabbed some pants and shirt and looked up to see Genesis sat on the bed with his head in his hands. He was just as scared as Reno was about this, he'd been losing a lot of weight and his appetite lately. His strength slipping from between his fingers as his sickness just got worse. Reno sighed sadly and turned away making his way up to Rufus penthouse suite. He stood in the elevator pacing as much as he could in the tiny space waiting to reach the top.
As soon as those doors opened he rushed to Rufus' room and stared in shock at the sight he found, Rufus laying underneath Tseng. He couldn't help but smile, he'd known about Tseng's little crush on the young President since they'd rescued him from the Shinra building. Reno grinned even wider thinking of exactly how he was going to use this to tease both of his bosses, but right now he had more pressing issues.
"Yo! Guys, if you can stop sucking face for a minute I need to borrow the Chopper for a few days!"
Rufus groaned rubbing his forehead and Tseng moved with the stealth of a cat off of Rufus. Rufus just lay there staring up at the ceiling contemplating asking Tseng to snap Reno's neck. It would be very easy but then they'd have to carry on with his body in the room...Not preferable. He sat up.
"Of all the times Reno..."
"Genesis is sick, I need to get him to Healin. He just keeps getting worse, yo... Please Rufus..."
"Fine, you know where everything is. Just...Get out and for the love of Gaia knock in future."
Reno didn't even bother to reply and instead just raced out and back to his apartment to get Genesis who was curled up on the sofa sleeping. Reno couldn't help himself, Genesis looked so beautiful when he was sleeping. So he decided to leave him undisturbed, gather him into his arms and make his way to the chopper so he could rest while Reno flew. It was going to be a long flight and hopefully Genesis would sleep through most of it.
~XXX~XXX~XXX~
Reno stood there staring at Genesis in shock. He should have expected this, they'd never been careful. All these modifications would have probably had some effect on his body just as they had before. But this, this was a brand new bucket of weird due to Jenova cells, Mako and who knows what else that resided in Genesis body.
"So...You're pregnant?"
Genesis sat on the bed staring at the photo from the scan, he had a strange peaceful aura surrounding him as well as a smile on his lips.
"Yes... It appears so." The smile never shifted, never went as he stroked the ink on the paper that was supposedly their baby.
Reno fell back into a seat. A baby. Could he even care for one? He'd killed babies, never directly. But when he dropped that plate...How many innocents had he slaughtered? How many had Genesis himself killed? They couldn't do this. They were killers, cold blooded, heartless murderers.
"Genesis... You...You wanna keep it don't you?"
There was a silence in the room, a silence that was so oppressive Reno felt it weighing on his chest. Restricting his breath, he was not going to panic and hyperventilate over this. He was a Turk. He'd suffered through so much worse than a pregnant lover.
"Of course I do, this a gift Reno. The Goddess has blessed me with-"
"NO! THE GODDESS HASN'T DONE JACK-SHIT! I'M SICK OF THIS GODDESS SHIT! YOU CAN'T KEEP THAT...THAT THING JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK THAT'S WHAT THE STUPID GODDESS WHO APPARENTLY SEALED YOU AWAY WANTS!"
Genesis lay in the bed, picture forgotten and jaw slack staring at Reno who was storming around the room still screaming at the top of his lungs kicking and punching everything in his path. From the wall to the chair he had been sat on. Genesis just sat up in the bed and watched him. He wanted to cry, but he wouldn't. He could not allowed himself this moment of weakness. If Reno would not stand beside him because of his childish fears of responsibility, he would stand alone.
"Are you done?" Genesis asked in a dull lifeless tone.
"YES! I AM! I'M FUCKING DONE! I DON'T WANT TO BE A FATHER! WE HAVE NO PLACE RAISING CHILDREN!"
"I'm still human! I have every right to all the other things people take for granted! I want to experience a real family... You never had one either-"
"Don't. Don't bring up my past..."
They stared at each other from across he room for a while, this uncomfortable moment where neither knew what to say to the other. What could they say to make the other see it their way. Eventually Genesis broke the silence.
"I'm keeping my child, you can leave me or stay with me. It will not change my decision, Reno. I have enough blood on my hands from those I loved without adding my child to it also..."
Reno stood staring at Genesis for the briefest moment, Genesis swore he saw sadness in his eyes before he turned his back and walked out of the room.
"Do whatever you fucking want...I'm done."
~XXX~XXX~XXX~
Reno lay in his bed a few weeks later, everything was back to his old cycle. The way it was before Genesis came back. The only exception was that instead of it being Rufus, it was whoever he could find at a bar that night. He would take them all to his bed, sometimes they didn't even make it that far, sometimes the bathroom, an alleyway and occasionally he woke up in their beds wondering where he was.
He'd seen Genesis around the Shinra building, being escorted around by a gloomy Tseng. Genesis himself didn't look any more cheerful than Tseng. He seemed to just be following the Turk around while he went about his daily business. Reno was snapped out of his thoughts of Genesis by a mail on his phone from Rufus. He opened the message for it to show a picture of a sleeping baby in an exhausted Genesis' arms.
The message attached read: 'Get a good look at him because he's leaving tomorrow to live with another family.'
The rage Reno felt inside him was indescribable, how could Rufus still be that much of a bastard? Didn't Genesis want to keep him? Had he agreed to have his daughter raised by strangers? He wouldn't stand for this. If Rufus was doing this against Genesis' will, Reno was going to stop him. He had no idea how, but he just would. He stormed out of his office and straight to Rufus' to find it empty.
Except of course for the still gloomy looking Tseng who was stood inside staring out the window.
"What are you doing here, Reno? You're supposed to be finishing paperwork." Reno almost flinched at the sound of Tseng's voice, it held no emotion. Not even the sadness that was clearly present in his eyes.
"Fuck paperwork, where is he?"
"I'm assuming you mean Rufus," That lifeless voice remained present in the presence of Reno's pure anger "He's in the infirmary with Genesis, making sure that he's kept incapacitated. I'm sure that Lockheart and Strife are there to see the baby before they pick him up tomorrow."
"HE'S GIVING MY BABY TO THE EMO-CHOCOBO AND BOOBS?"
"Why not, Reno? You have made it abundantly clear that you do not wish for any involvement with the child. It's in his best interests. Genesis has not been stable emotionally or mentally throughout the whole pregnancy and the child can't be raised by him. He has given him a name though, Rufus allowed him to do that at the very least."
"...I'm going to fucking kill that bleach blond bastard!"
"I can assure you Reno that my hair is not bleached. Now if you're quite done causing a scene, could you leave my office and go back to whatever it is you do. Drink, I'm sure."
Reno turned to see Rufus stood in the doorway of the office, leaning against the frame casually checking his nails. Reno's rage was uncontrollable at this point. He was across the room and at the doorway in seconds, gripping Rufus shirt and slamming him against the wall near the door.
"What the fuck is your problem, yo? Genesis is going to be a fucking brilliant mother, why take away the one thing he fucking wants?"
"As Tseng has told you, he has become unstable. Therefore leading him to suffer from depression, that's an awfully dangerous situation for an infant to be in. I'm doing what's best for both of them, something you probably can't understand. Must be nice to run away from responsibility. So leave and continue running, it doesn't bother me what you do to ruin everyone's lives. I'm never cleaning up your messes again, I did this because Genesis asked me to help him. Something you could have done yourself, but you're too much of a coward."
Reno was so angry that he couldn't even hear that tiny voice of reason inside his head. He could only feel nothing but pure hatred for his boss, so he did what he did to everyone he hated. He punched Rufus square in the jaw. Before he had time to think of what he'd done or even think of apologizing to Rufus, he was on his ass with Tseng's hands around his throat.
"Never touch him again, do you understand?"
Reno nodded his head gasping for breath struggling under his superior. He saw a pale hand on Tseng's shoulder.
"Let him go Tseng, I'm fine. Don't bother hurting him, he's perfectly capable of doing that to himself." Rufus' voice sounded oddly soft and gentle for someone who'd just been assaulted.
Reno gasped for breath desperately when Tseng finally let go of his neck and got off him going over to check on Rufus.
"Tseng, I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me, I'm not that easily harmed. You just reacted before I could and floored him."
"Of course I did, I wasn't going to stand there and let him pummel you."
Reno finally gained back enough breath to stand, but not without support. He stood leaning against the wall watching Rufus and Tseng interact. Acting so nonchalant as he stood here still gasping for breath.
"W-Where is he?" He had tried to sound threatening, but failed completely with only managing to sound nervous due to his shaking voice.
Rufus' eyes changed in seconds when he turned away from Tseng, he had his cold calculating eyes on. The same eyes he had on while making business deals or threatening people who were trying to mess with his company.
"Why would I tell you? You're the last person I'd want to see if I was in his position."
"Well Rufus, you ain't him. I'm sure you'd fucking love to be if you weren't with Tseng, but you fucking ain't! Is he still in the infirmary? Or is he somewhere else? Did he take a fucking trip to Disney land? Stop fucking staring at me answer me before I get seriously fucking pissed rich boy!"
Rufus finally stopped staring at him long enough as he ranted to give him an answer, in a voice that told Reno, Rufus was most definitely not happy with him and didn't appreciate insults. The voice spoke for itself. It was Rufus' 'Don't Fuck With Me' voice.
"You're right, Reno. He is in Disney Land, in fact right now he's dancing with Cinderella oh wait now they're swapping hair care tips. Where the fuck do you think he is you ignorant slum rat?"
Reno stared at Rufus who'd finally lost his cool, he was breathing heavily with his fists clenched tight enough that Reno was relatively sure that Rufus' perfectly manicured nails had broken skin. Reno paled as he noticed Rufus' was now shaking with rage.
"Seriously, yo. What crawled up your ass and died?"
"GET TO THE FUCKING INFIRMARY BEFORE I THROW YOU OUT THE FUCKING WINDOW!"
And so he did, he raced to the infirmary as if the devil himself was on his heels. Reno was pretty sure that he would have been if he'd stood there for a minute longer. When he arrived at the infirmary he looked around in confusion. Where would Genesis be? He probably had a private room. Reno stood for a few seconds in thought. Did he risk asking a nurse to show him or just find it himself?
After looking around Reno noticed that there weren't any nurses around so he'd have to find Genesis' room himself until he found help. But luckily a few minutes into his search he heard a baby crying. He saw an open door in his current corridor, and leaning against that doorway looking in was Cloud Strife.
Reno approached slowly and stood beside Strife who didn't even turn his head to regard him. Inside the sight he saw, it broke his heart. Genesis was clearly exhausted, laying in bed only propped up by pillows. Reno the sadness in his eyes, Genesis was watching Tifa comfort his crying son.
"Excuse me, yo. But I think you'll find that's our baby. Go get your own."
Reno had shocked himself for a moment. Did he really just say that? Was it him who said that? Not the evil demon of family togetherness? Reno stood his ground though, even if his mind was having arguments with itself. Tifa smiled at him and handed him back the baby. Genesis on the other hand, was staring at Reno like he'd just joined a church. Absolute shock and horror was plastered all over his face.
"Hey, Gen. You named him yet?"
'Don't run away. Do not run away. You can do this, Reno. You can be a parent...Shit...He's...Well...Shit...How do you change a diaper? Does Gen know? CRAP! Tifa would have known and he'd just sent her away!'
"...R-Reno...? I thought...Well you said..."
Reno looked down at the balling baby in his arms and was so grateful when it was swept out of his arms and placed onto a changing table by a nurse. He watched as the nurse changed him and put him down for a nap. Once Reno was sure the baby was going to be fine he turned to Genesis and kissed his forehead.
"Gen...I say and do a lot of stupid shit... You of all people should know that. I don't think about anything... I open my mouth and say shit before I've even thought about what could happen next...I...I'm sorry that I've fucked you over these past few months...I'm sorry I'm such a fucking ass hole... But I wanna be here, yo...I wanna help."
Reno bit his lip and watched Genesis face for a reaction. The last thing he expected was tears. Genesis started bawling uncontrollably, Reno stood in panic just watching him. This had never happened before. Genesis didn't do crying. Oh god what if he'd seriously fucked up.
"Y-You're right, Reno... You are a great big fucking ass hole...But I do need your help...I need your help with him...If I do it alone I'll fuck up..."
Reno grinned and wrapped his arms around Genesis.
"Then let's fuck up together."
~XXX~XXX~XXX~
"Minerva?"
"For the last time, Gen. We're not naming him Minerva … Johnny?"
"Too common." Genesis groaned as he lay in their bed watching their 2 week old baby sleep. They had yet to come to an agreement on any name.
"...Hey... How would you feel about Zack?"
Genesis flinched slightly. He had been the direct cause of Zack's death. Sephiroth's, Angeal's and Lazard's too. They all weighed heavily on his heart. He stared at their red haired little baby boy. He was getting chubby, but all babies were meant to be chubby, right?
"Zack Angeal Rhapsodos... I think it's perfect..."
Reno grinned to himself. He'd done it, broken the cycle. No more drinking, it was the same person in his bed every night. His life was his own now, but he'd found 2 people he wanted to share it with. So far, anyway.
THE END!