CALL YOUR DOCTOR IF…

A DaveKat Romance

One fateful evening them bois were chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool on the couch where they had fucked each other many times before. This couch was in a way sacred to these bros. This disgusting piece of furniture had been their place of all bro sessions, including games, deep conversations, the sharing of the most dank memes and rap battles, as well as countless beejes and ass play Dave liked to call "bro time".

But today, they gave their anuses a break and played video games. This only lasted a few hours until shit got freaky once more.

They were sweaty and on the verge of tears after finishing an especially heated round of Mario Party 2. Palms hot and worn from joystick abuse, Karkat threw his arms in the air.

"That is bullshit," he cried, "I can't believe your dumb ass won again!"

"That's what happens when you go against the master of timeless games." Dave stated. His killer shades refracted light in a cool timely manner.

"Timeless. THIS is considered timeless?!"

"Yeah."

"By who?!"

"Me, bitch" His shades glittered once more.

"Wow, how in the FUCK are you so fucking arrogant?!"

Once again for the five billionth time, Karkat went on some stupid monologue speech that no one gave a fuck about. His passionate rant on how much of a shitlord Dave was turned Dave on. Dave noticed that Karkat was hot and bothered as well, and took action.

"Bro." Dave put a hand on Karkat's gross alien thighs. "Bro… Bro time?"

Karkat huffed and repeated, "Bro time."

Shit man after that they just went at each other. Little did they know that this bro time would change their lives. In the heat of the moment the gross alien bit into Dave's neck, but much deeper than before. After that, Karkat couldn't help but notice a little problem. Did I say a little problem? I meant a big problem. Big as in Dave's massive dick. Like I'm talking an abnormally massive erect donger.

Karkat showed concern, but he decided to talk about it after their loud steamy bro time. Their couch lost it's will and collapsed from under them, but it didn't matter. They continued, shoving couch scraps up each others asses. A pillow was absorbed by Karkat's ass, due to a troll's biological process of absorbing water and nutrients via their anuses. *Certain bugs irl do that. Isn't that crazy?*

Regaining their breath from bro time, Karkat spoke, "Your bone bulge is still so fucking big and erect, you should probably get some help—"

Before he could say anything else, Dave grabbed Karkat's thicc insectoid ass and whispered, "Bro. Our bro time is the only help I need."

Karkat lost his shit to that fucking smoothness and so they banged like another 3 times for the sake of a glorious bro time. Afterwards they showered together and it made bro time complete. That is until Dave fainted and had to be taken to the ER.

He awoke in a white room with Karkat at his side.

"What's going on?" Dave asked nonchalantly. His shades glimmered in confusion.

The doctor, in utter disbelief and ready to quit his job, explained, "When you were bit during your… "bro time", a chemical reaction made something commonly called the Never Ending Boner."

"That's fucking sick." Dave said

"No it's not sick it's fatal, Mr. Strider"

"That's even more sick" He gave into a fit of coughing and became lightheaded. Dave's shades sparkled just a little dimmer.

Karkat, on the verge of tears, shook him violently and begged for his beloved bro to make it through the Never Ending Boner.

But alas, death came, and his killer shades gleamed one last time. Karkat fell upon his still veiny, monstrous cock that stood like a mighty redwood tree and mourned.

When night fell, Karkat still mourned over Dave. However, a blinding light shined. It was his signature shades! With his shades came his ghost.

"Bro." Dave echoed down, "The fuck you doing? Let's go, we're missing bro time."

So, they went home and had more paranormal bro time, and used the remainder of their couch to shove up each others asses.

THE END