Notes: I know I said I would take a break from writing but I listened to a song and this story just popped into my mind. This will be sort of an AU for a short part, but it's mostly Swan Queen as we know it. You'll know what I mean.
I would have loved to elaborate into this story, but I'm a lazy ass and I rather finish this up in four chapters than leave it unfinished forever.
It's been a long time since I watched season 4 (since it was aired) so I don't really remember the darkness plot, but I hope I made some sense.
I must also say that I'm Spanish so you will probably find mistakes in my writing. Apologies in advance!
Enough explanation now. I hope you enjoy this short fic and as always let me know what you think of it!
Chapter 1: the dream
"There has to be a third way, Regina."
Reginasighed, looking at Emma. She had already said goodbye to everyone, but left Emma and Henry to be the last she spoke before she parted. They were at the limit of the town. The paint that served as a reminder of the invisible line that separated Storybrooke from the real word was fading; someone should repaint it soon.
"There isn't a third option this time, Emma. The Darkness will keep chasing after me and it's dangerous both if it catches me or if it doesn't."
"But you can fight it, Mom. I know it," Henry tried one more time. Regina looked at him; he was growing taller and she no longer had to look down. She swallowed the lump when she realized she would never see him grow up to be an adult.
"It's for the best, Henry. It's me it is after; if I'm not in town, it will stop."
"And are we going to just live with that wandering around the streets waiting for you to come back?"
Reginatook a while to raise her gaze from Henry to Emma. The Sheriff could see the pain in her eyes, but also the determination floating in dark brown. "I won't hurt anyone in this town. Not anymore."
Emma squeezed her hands on Henry's shoulders, more to stop herself from the anger the situation caused her than for comfort to her son. She stared back at Regina, her teeth pulling at the side of her cheek and chewing.
"Do you have everything ready?"
Regina nodded and shot a glance to her car, waiting with the door open for her to get in and drive away from town. "New identity, new town, new memories, new life." The sorrow in her voice didn't go unnoticed by Emma and Henry, who pouted at the same time.
"You could at least tell us which town you're going to," Emma tried one last time.
Regina smiled softly, raising an eyebrow, "So you and your Charming army come after me? You know I can't."
"It's not fair." Henry crossed his arms on his chest and her brows furrowed, clearly trying to keep the tears at bay. Regina cupped his cheek, pushing it up gently to force him to look at her. She opened her mouth to tell him something, but before she could, a strong thunder was heard from afar and they all turned to look at the town's horizon.
"It won't be long until the restraints that are containing it no longer succeed at it." Her eyes fell on Emma, whose features were reflecting the deep worry she felt. "I should get going." Her voice was low, like if she was holding back the sobs.
Reginastood in front of Emma. "I expect you to protect this town and the people in it like the good Sheriff you proved to be."
Emma managed to smile, "I thought the election was a sham?"
Both of their eyes were shining, threatening to spill the tears, but still they smiled at each other. Regina rolled her eyes softly, lacking of the venom it used to hold. "Don't push it." She took a breath of fresh air, but it was out of her lungs before she could register it. Emma's hands wrapped around her slender body and Regina's shaky hands found her strong back after a beat.
Everyone they considered a close one was there looking at them, even Hook although he had made it clear Regina wasn't his favourite person and vice versa. Still, it would probably be the last time she saw Emma, so Regina allowed herself a moment to enjoy the hug and closed her eyes, diving into the aroma of cinnamon and clean clothes that usually surrounded Emma like an aura.
The second they separated, Regina felt like it hadn't been enough, but she knew her time was running out, so she turned to Henry. He hugged her the instant she was free of Emma's embrace, tackling much like her other mother had done. Regina held him tight, trying to seal the feeling into her mind. She knew she wouldn't remember a thing about any of it, but she hoped something would remain in the back of her mind.
"I love you Henry. Never forget that."
He nodded, no longer trying to hold back the tears, and sniffed, hugging her one more time. Regina looked at Emma over Henry's head. "Take care of him like I would."
"I'll try," Emma promised with a nod. She wasn't one to make promises, knowing she could change her heart and break it. She was sure though, that promise she would comply.
Regina took a step back, shooting one last glance at everyone. Her family. The ones she had to leave behind for the greater good. Rumple, her mentor, with Belle with whom she hadn't crossed much words, but she was still family. The Charmings, looking at her with tears in their eyes too; they may have had their difference but she considered them family now as well and she wouldn't admit it out loud but she would miss them. It was strange when her eyes fell on Robin. Her long lost soulmate, reunited at last only to take separate ways again. It was strange though, when she didn't feel the same feeling of sorrow she felt when her gaze landed on Emma and Henry. They had been through a lot and it seemed like yesterday when Henry was no more than half a metre and she spent the day bickering with Emma. She would miss them terribly, more than she could ever imagine. Emma had become a pillar in her life somehow and she would miss having her around even if just to jokingly snap at her to earn a smile from soft pink lips.
Hook placed a hand on Emma's shoulder, startling both the blonde and Regina, who was watching them. The pirate nodded once, her hand squeezing on Emma's shoulder. Regina decided to skip the sadness on Emma's face, repeating inwardly she was doing the right thing. Smiling one more time to Henry, she swallowed and turned to get into her car.
"Don't look. Don't look." She kept repeating it like a mantra while she put her seatbelt on and turned the keys. The car roared to life and she clenched her teeth, looking ahead of her instead of through the rear mirror like she wanted. In less than a minute she would forget everything. There would be no pain.
Regina eased into first gear and released the breath she had been holding, pressing on the accelerator and leaving Storybrooke and the only family she had behind.
Regina woke up abruptly with her face and hair wet. She sat up in the dark, her breathing heavy. The calming sound of the city in the background helped her to come back to reality as she took in where she was. It was too late to bother to check the hour, but still the lights from the streets brought light into her room, helping her notice the body that was lying next to her on the bed.
When she raised her hand to move her dark hair off her face, she realised it wasn't sweat what made it wet, but tears. She dried them and brought her hand up to inspect it. She was unsuccessful due to the lack of light, but before she could give it another thought, the body next to her stirred.
"Regina?" a soft voice called. The girl sat on the bed next to Regina, brushing her eyes and yawning.
"We fell asleep." Regina said more like a fact and less like a question. She barely fell asleep after sex; she just dismissed whoever she was with and she didn't fall asleep until they were out the door.
The girl giggled, the slumber still clear in her voice, "I don't know about you but last night left me kind of tired."
"You should leave," Regina mumbled stepping off the bed. The covers slid gracefully down her body, revealing her nakedness. She wasn't embarrassed about her body, she was proud of it so she didn't pay no mind to it. Instead, she leaned down to pick the other girl's clothes, handing them to her once she had everything.
"But—" the girl started.
Regina flashed her teeth in a smile that would seem genuine if not the fact it didn't reach her eyes. "I need to wake up early tomorrow for work. I'm sorry." She noticed the girl wasn't really convinced by her excuse. She couldn't blame her; it was lame.
Regina sauntered over to the bed and sat, folding a leg underneath her so she was sitting on it. She played with a loose strand of blonde hair that fell on the girl's collarbone. "Last night was good. I'll call you, Claire." Regina was surprised she even remembered her name, but it was enough for Claire, who smiled and looked down bashfully. "I'll leave you to get dressed."
Grabbing a robe she had hung outside the closet some time the previous day, Regina covered her naked body and left the master bedroom. Without hesitation she walked to the kitchen, her bare feet whispering against the cool marble of the floor. She hissed slightly at the coldness of it; she had forgotten to leave the heater on and now the cold of the streets was reigning in her attic. While she prepared a tea, she tugged her robe closer to her.
It had been the weirdest dream she had had in a long time. Probably since forever. Regina with a child? That was impossible; she couldn't have children on her own. The doctor's surprise to the unknown causes of her infertility matched her own when she had visited her a few months ago. It was great for Regina's life style though. She didn't have to worry to get pregnant from any of her lovers. She used protection, but one could never know.
And the blonde. Emma, she had called her. Something inside her twisted at the thought of her and Regina felt like she was missing something but couldn't quite pin it. Her hand was absently stirring the tea while her mind wandered about that blonde when the sound of the door opening startled her.
Regina looked over her shoulder to see Claire closing the door of her bedroom, her shoulders down with shyness. She had found her purse and was carrying it on her hand now. Regina shot a glance at the clock and, after releasing a sigh, she walked around the kitchen island to the coffee table, where her own purse was resting. "I'll give you something for a taxi."
Claire put a hand over Regina's to stop her. "It's okay." She reached into her purse and fished out a card Regina knew very well. "I hope you don't mind I wrote on the back." She tip toed to plant an innocent kiss on Regina's cheek and walked away.
Regina heard the click of her front door as she closed it. She shuffled over to the window, making sure Claire got into a car and only when the taxi disappeared into a sea of other yellow taxis, she raised the card to take a look at it.
"Regina Howlett," she read out loud. Underneath her name she could read Attorney and her number below. She rolled it between her fingers and read Claire's name with her number written on the back.
She would have to wake up in a few hours but she just took a seat by the window and stared at the city. The city that never sleeps. When she moved in last year she thought it was a crazy idea, but she needed a change and she had just jumped into it. She had gotten used to it though. She quickly found a job in an important firm and found a great place to live. Anyone could say she had luck. Anyone but herself.
Yes, she had a great life, but she felt like there was something missing in it. She wouldn't define that missing piece as a romantic interest, but definitely something about the tenderness of a relationship, a family, that she felt like would fill right in. Not really knowing exactly what she needs, she lives trying to fill that something with strangers warming her bed almost every night. It still doesn't feel right, but at least she can forget about that for a while.
Regina sighed and finally stood up. She shot a glance at the presumably now cold cup of tea resting on the kitchen counter and turned off the lights before stepping back into her bedroom. She disrobed and slid between the soft covers of her wide bed, closing her eyes to try to get some sleep before the alarm went off, her mind still going over the dream she had had and how for a second she had felt the gears of her life working in unison.