DOG TAGS
Chapter 1 DYING MEMORIES
Dog tags, a peace of metal with a name given to the men and women of the military. Put on there so people can identify your body by looking at your tags. It's just like an expiration date, once dead they check the name and your marked off the list, forever. But this isn't about some army tags, no this is about dog tags with names and a promise. A promise to me, telling me they will be there when I come home, if I come home. And even then they will wait, I know they will. Dog tags that I grip till my knuckles turn white, whiter than snow. I grip them when I am in a situation like I'm in now, blood flowing out my mouth while I lay under the pouring rain. Trying to savior every breath I take, knowing that it could be my last, trying not to think about the two medium size bullet holes going into then out of me. Trying not to think about dying, but even I know that living is out of the question, all the medical training in the world can't help me now. Right now my vision is already beginning to fog up, turning white just like my knuckles from gripping theses dog tags, given to me by the one whom I think of most. As my vision fogs, I start to see her standing over me with worried eyes, just like they where before I left, it was the last night I saw her. And in thinking of her, I remember the promise I made to her, I promised I would come back alive. And not in a box, thinking of how hurt she would be it brings light back into my eyes. But even I know it may not be enough to pull through this, but I'm stubborn to stubborn to just give up. I knew what I was getting into when I joined, nobody tried to stop me, and if they were worried then they didn't show it much. She's crying now, standing over me, watching me die slowly I cant say I'm in pain anymore, I cant feel anything it's so cold. She was always one to get cold, even if it was a hundred degrees outside. Just like that night, my senior graduation.
I stood in that gym, tall and proud wearing my digital army uniform, while everyone else wore their blue gowns. I stood there like a statue while everyone shook hands hugged to congratulate one another of this being it, the beginning of the rest of their lives. "Lives that I will protect." I thought as my friend who I see as a brother, walked up to me, grabbed my hand and gave me a hug. I didn't hug back I just kept my arm by my side as he gave me a long thoughtful hug.
"She's waiting to talk to you." he whispered to me before he pulled away. "Please, don't leave her with nothing." he said to me before he shook my hand one more time and walked off towards his girl friend.
I stood there ideal, as I watched him walk to his girl and hug her, lift her up and spin him and her around laughing. He looked back towards me and waved me off, I gave him an empty smile and a wave before making my way towards the exit. You could call me coward I wouldn't have cared, I just couldn't do it. I didn't want my last memory of her, being of her holding hands with that someone I couldn't be, I wouldn't have been able to focus I would have been glaring at the joined hands. I mean it's surprising that she wanted to talk to me. Before the ceremony started, I saw her walk in hand in hand with her boyfriend, she walked right by me, I stand out like a sore thumb in my uniform. But I guess it was a conversation that was meant to be after wards.
But instead of doing what I was asked, I just tried to leave cowards way out. But for some reason my plans never work out for me, because it's like she's able to read my mind to stop me from whatever I'm about to do. I pretended I didn't notice her leaning against the chain link fence, and just kept walking praying she wouldn't say anything. But when has that ever worked for me either.
"You just going to leave without saying anything to me?" She questioned as she stood away from the fence with her arms crossed.
I stopped walking and turned towards her with the best smile I could muster . "Hey Sakura, sorry I was in a hurry. I wanted to get home and get my bags ready." I said as I looked into her eyes, which looked to be glistening with tears. But I shook it off as my imagination getting the better of me.
She seemed to what looked like shiver as she said, "Yeah, your shipping out tomorrow aren't you." She rubbed her arms. It really wasn't cold out, mid May, but she always did get cold easily.
"Yeah, you cold?" I asked with a questioning eyebrow raised.
She just shook her head saying. "Yeah, a little."
I took off my zip up army top and walked closer to her and wrapped it around her shoulders. She just looked up at me with a smile and slid her arms through the sleeves. "Thanks, you always did say I should get me one of these." She said as she ran her fingers over the patch with my name. To which it made me smile.
"Well then, why don't you take mine." I said as I put my hand on her shoulder.
"I cant, it's yours." She said lamely as she looked away.
I just rolled my eyes at her, but smiled none the less. "Just keep it, besides I'll only end up getting bullet holes all over it." I said trying to make a joke.
Saying that didn't make her laugh, but clutch the jacket, and those imaginary tears became real. "Why?" She asked as she squeezed her eyes shut as if to stop her tears from falling.
I took my hand off her shoulder and gave her a worried look. "Why what?" I asked pretending not to know what she was asking.
She looked up at me with anger in her eyes, "Why would you say that!" she said in anger. " Do you not want to come back home?" She continued choking on her tears, she looked down towards her feet and tried to rub the tears out of her eyes.
I looked at her with sad eyes, and steeped forward and brought her into a hug. "Of course I want to come home." I whispered into her ear. "But we cant pretend that there isn't a chance I wont." I continued to whisper.
She rested her head on my shoulder and sobbed a little. "I know I always said do what you want…" She paused to catch her breath. "But why did this have to be it?" She said clutching my white shirt. "Why do you have to risk your life for something that might never end?" She continued.
I wrapped my arms around her a little tighter, " Because, I'm going so you or anyone else wont have to." I said pulling away giving her a smile. To which she just looked up at me with tears still flowing out of her eyes slowly.
"I could still join, just because you go doesn't mean I wont." She said rubbing her eyes.
"I know, but I like to think that me going, will be enough to protect you." I said smiling down at her tear streaked face.
She just shook her head, but smiled through her tears and rested her head back on my shoulder. I smiled down at her again and rested my chin on top of her head. "You know something?" I asked taking my chin off her head and looking at her face.
"Well I know a lot, but not what your thinking." She said smiling.
I just shook my head laughing a little. "This is the first time I've seen you cry." I said looking her in the eyes, with a smile.
She just looked away. "Well this is serious, you cant blame me my best friend is leaving for god knows how long." She said as she looked down trying to rub her eyes free of tears. "So yeah, and I don't use this excuse often, but I am a girl. And girls worry, a lot especially about the people she really cares about." She said as she gave her best friend another hug.
I just looked down at her, her head resting on my chest, but I could see her eyes, they were squeezed shut. As if, as if she was trying to keep the tears from falling. "I'll be back, before you know it I will. And when I do you'll beg me to go back because I'll be annoying the hell out of everyone." I said trying to make another joke, but I didn't even have the enthusiasm to make it sound as if I was joking. But she hugged me tighter, and I could feel my shirt getting damp from her tears.
"I'm scared." she whispered.
"Of what, what are you scared of?" I asked as I rubbed her hair trying to relax her.
"I'm scared your gonna walk out of here and I'll never see you again, this place is where I will see you last. And your only memory of me will be me crying into you like some weak girl." She said grinding her teeth in frustration. "It's so damn frustrating, I don't wanna lose you, no I can't lose you, your so important to me." she said squeezing me tighter.
I continued to rub her hair, trying to calm her down, but it didn't seem to be working so I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her back. "Sakura, I'm still here, I haven't left just yet." I said trying to comfort her with words.
"But your leaving tomorrow." she said into my chest.
"Sakura, do you want to watch the stars with me?" I asked dodging the last statement.
She looked at me for what seemed like eternity "Sure, it sounds lovely." she answered with a smile. "I'd love to watch the stars with you." She said as she hugged me again.
Ok peoples of fanfictiction, its been forever since my last story. But I'd like to say I think I have improved greatly. Even if it was just a little lol. But I'm not gonna write another chapter till I see how many reviews I get. And if anyone even likes how this one sounds, but please tell me what you think.
