Disclaimer: The X-Men, associated characters, and likenesses are the exclusive property of the Marvel Company. Many of the lines are the intellectual property of the X-Men writers and the issues or TPB's from which they come are cited. This is a work of fan fiction and no profit is being made from it.
Thanks to: The French Quarter, The Joker and the Queen, Uncanny X-Men. net, and Gambit Guild UK for their fabulous info, and of course the writers of X-Men who write such awesome stories.
Southern Lovin'
Part One: In the beginning...
The stage is set plainly in the style of a staged reading. No costumes, some special lighting and select props. Enter our two stars of the show: Gambit and Rogue to their own mikes on the stage as does the narrator of sorts, Anna, the fanfic writer.
Anna: Hello, and welcome to my recounting of the Romy saga. In all reality a fangirl tribute to my favorite comic book characters. (A beat.) Well, I have only ever read one comic book title.
Rogue: 'Scuse me, sugah. Who the hell are ya anyway and why're ya tellin' our story.
Anna: I'm Anna, Anna, and I'm one of you and Gambit's biggest fans.
Gambit: T'anks for th' compliment.
Rogue: How the hell do ya know mah real name?
Anna: I read the comic, silly. Ok, on to the story. We start at the beginning. Who wants to go first?
Rogue: Since Ah joined the X-Men before him, we should start with meh. Sorry, Remy.
Gambit: S'okay. Whatever the lady wants.
Rogue: Ah was born in Caldecott County, Mississippi 25 years ago...
Rogue's mother, Priscilla, with a little bundle in her arms, and her Aunt Carrie appear.
Priscilla: Ain't she just the sweetest 'lil peach ya ever seen?
Carrie: Oh, she is. Here lemme hold her. Ya must be exhausted.
Priscilla: (Handing her the baby.) There ya go. (Pause.) Ah was thinking ah'd name her Anna-Marie after Mama.
Rogue: Yeah, that's mah real name. (A beat. Priscilla and Carrie exit.) Mama died not too many years after Ah was born. Ah'll spare y'all the details, but let's just say it was real strange.-
Anna: She got stuck in the Far Banks after your father and the other men used her and the other women to get there.-
Rogue: Okay, ya can shut up now. Well, mah Daddy brought me ta mah Aunt Carrie 'cause he couldn't raise meh on his own. She was really strict and Ah didn't like her. Ah thought she hated meh, but she really loved meh. She always called meh a rogue. The name really stuck, ya could say. Ah ran away from home when Ah was ten and lived in the woods for a while. Stole what Ah needed. That lasted 'til one day Ah met a certain woman...
Mystique appears.
Mystique: Well, hello there, sweetheart. What are you doing out here all alone? Aren't your parents looking for you?
Rogue: Mah parents are dead. Ah grew up in the woods.
Mystique: Oh, I'm so sorry. Would you like a hot meal and a nice place to stay?
Rogue: That'd be nice, Ma'am. (A beat.) So Ah went to live with Mystique an' her lover, Destiny. Ah found out that they were both mutants, and that was fahne with meh. They were both part of this 'lil organization called the Brotherhood of Mutants. One day Ah found out Ah was mutant too, 'cept my power turned out ta be real awful. (A beat.) There was this boy Ah was sweet on, Cody. We'd been friends for a really long time. One day he decided ta kiss meh an' Ah was excited, 'cept all ova sudden Ah felt this pull an' his thoughts were in mah head an' he just passed out. He neveh woke up. Ah soon realized Ah'd could neveh be 'mong normal people, mah power bein' instantaneous absorption. Ah joined Mystique and Destiny on their missions doin' terrorist activities. It wasn't raight but Ah didn't know any better. Ah used mah power ta hurt people.
(A beat.) Mah first real mission, Ah nearly killed a woman, a real hero...Ms. Marvel of the Avengers. Ah went to attack her an' when Ah put mah bare hands on her, Ah couldn't let go 'til she was 'bout dead. From that point on, Ah had her powers of superhuman strength, invulunerability, an' flight and her mind in mah head permanently. Ah was goin' crazy and Mystique couldn't help meh an' Ah was startin' ta not wanna do bad things anymore. So Ah went ta mah enemies, the X-Men, 'cause they were mah only hope. (taken from Uncanny X-Men #171) They took meh in, even though Ah didn't deserve it. An' after nearly dyin' to save Wolverine's fiancé they knew Ah had a good heart. (Pause.) Okay, Remy, yoah turn.
Anna stares at Gambit intently.
Gambit: Merci, chère.
Rogue: (To Anna.) Stop starin' at mah man.
Gambit: Enthusiasm always appreciated. (A beat.) I was born in New Orleans 'bout 28 years ago I reckon...
Thieves 1# and 2# run on, one of them carrying a baby.
Thief 1#: C'mon, we gotta get dis bebé t'de Antiquary b'fore dey come after us.
Thief 2#: Alright, I'm comin'. He gon' pay us real well. We got de diable blanc f'r 'im.
Thief 1#: 'cordin' t'de prophecy dis p'tite gon' unite de T'ieves an' Assassins.
Thief 2#: Don' care 'bout no prophecies, I jus' wan' de money.
They run off.
Gambit: I didn' stay long wit' dat man 'til de patriach of de T'ieves Guild, Jean-Luc LeBeau, heard 'bout me an' placed me wit' dis man named Fagan t'raise me up on de streets, an' arranged my future adoption. I developed my skills, an' a certain appreciation for de ladies. One day I met a certain jeune fille who later became my wife...
Belladonna as a kid runs on chased by some men. Gambit picks up a charged rock and is about to throw it when she expertly fights them off.
How'd you do dat?
Belladonna: My daddy's de head of de Assassins an' he trained me up good.
Gambit: You real deadly.
Belladonna: You a t'ief. Bet you real good too.
Gambit: Non, jus' an amateur. (A beat.) I light t'ings up, wan' see?
Belladonna: You're a mutant. I hope Candra, de external, gon' give me powers some day. What's your name?
Gambit: Remy.
Belladonna: Belladonna Boudreaux. I gotta go now. Don' you worry, you're life gon' get better soon, I know.
She runs off.
Gambit: Well, you could say it got better, 'cus one day I picked de pocket of a certain man. Turned out it was all a set-up...
Jean-Luc LeBeau enters. Gambit sneaks up behind him and tries to steal his wallet. Jean-Luc turns around and seizes him.
Jean-Luc: Got you boy. What you doin' stealin' from de head of de T'ieves Guild!?
Gambit: Not'ing, lemme go!
Jean-Luc: (Lets him go.) You one damn good t'ief. You wan' live wit' me, be my son? I teach you to be de best t'ief in de world. What d'you say?
Gambit: Don' look like I get no other option. (A beat.) Well he trained me up real good, an' I got myself a family, got a brother, Henri. Got my whole life planned out up to my wedding t'my best friend, Belladonna. Dey made us get married to unite de T'ieves and Assassins, b'fore we even ready... (taken from X-Men #8)
Gambit and Belladonna walk down a pretend aisle and pantomime wedding vows, etc. Julien runs in and confronts Gambit.
Julien: LeBeau, you have no right to marry my sister!
Belladonna: You get outta here, Julien!
Gambit: I don' wan' fight you, homme.
Jullien: We finish dis here.
Gambit and Julien get swords and fight, but Gambit being the better fighter, charges his sword and takes Julien out. Julien is on the ground seemingly dead. Random thieves and assassins run on as does Jean-Luc, and Belladonna and Julien's father, Marius. The assassins and Marius carry Julien off. Jean-Luc remains.
Gambit: I didn' mean to.
Jean-Luc: I know. But to prevent a guild war I need to banish you from New Orleans. You better be on your way. I love you, my son. (Gambit LS '94 #4)
He exits.
Gambit: I went 'round doin' what jobs I could. 'Course I also realized dat my powers were out 'o control. I didn' know what to do, so a friend 'o mine tol' me 'bout dis scientist, Sinister. I didn' know at de time dat his help came wit' a price...
Sinister appears.
(To Sinister.) I can' do dis no more. Someone gon' get hurt.
Sinister: One last task, Remy, and only then will I let you go.
He disappears.
Gambit: He had me gather up some real bad people, his Marauders, and lead 'em to the Morlocks, people wit' mutations so dey can' live wit' normal humans, in de sewers of New York. I didn' know dat dey were gon' massacre 'em all... (The Marauders appear attacking the Morlocks and killing them. Gambit tries to stop them but can't. He sees a little girl, Sarah (Marrow), in peril and scoops her up as quickly as he can and rushes her to safety.) Could only save one o' dem, a 'lil girl wit' bones sticking out ev'rywhere. (To Sarah.) Please forgive me, p'tite, 'cause I ain' never gon' forgive myself. (taken from Uncanny X-Men #350) (Sarah exits.) I felt damned. I kept runnin' from ev'ryt'ing doin' more heists 'til one day I met a certain weather goddess. She'd been de-aged t'adolescence an' I jus' happened t'be in time t'save her from drownin' in a pool. We fought de bad guys an' I taught her some o' my tricks, an' we got 'er back to her ol' self. Den, Stormy, she invite me t'join de X-Men. I didn' have not'ing better t'do, so I said sure.
Rogue: 'Kay, sugah, time's up.
Gambit: C'mon, Roguey. You don' wan' hear me talk anymore?
Rogue: Not on ya life, Cajun.
Anna: And now on to the first meeting--off panel of course.
Part Two: Getting to know you...
Rogue: Well, Ah had just come back from the Savage Land-
Anna: And spending time with Magneto.
Rogue: That's enough outta ya. How'd you know that?
Anna: Fan websites. (Pause.) Let's get on with it, sorry.
Gambit and Rogue walk towards each other each too caught up to notice where they are going. They bump into each other. Rogue extends her hand straight out to keep her distance and to shake his hand. He kisses it instead.
Rogue: Rogue.
Gambit: Gambit.
Rogue: That ain't yoah name.
Gambit: Rogue ain't yours.
Rogue: Whatevah.
She walks away and back to her mike.
Gambit: She was très belle an' I couldn' stop lookin' at 'er.
Rogue: He was gorgeous but Ah knew Ah could neveh really love anyone 'cause I couldn't touch 'em. Besides, he had a certain treacherous look 'bout 'im.
Gambit: Doesn' mean I wasn' gon' try.
Rogue: Ah was gonna give 'im a run for his money.
Anna: And now a song for my good little audience. Cue the music.
Raucous New Orleans piano jazz starts playing. Gambit obviously not giving up goes right up to Rogue, who doesn't appreciate the attention.
Gambit: Maybe I should tell you more 'bout m'self.
Rogue: Shove it, ya sleaze, an' keep yoah hands ta yaself.
Gambit: Ok, if you wan' it dat way. (Sings. Rapid fire delivery.)
I been all 'round dis world
From Madripoor to Japan,
Six come eleven straight up to the seven,
I don' never stop.
Ain' never met a woman
Who couldn' resist my charm,
Played my cards right,
I never did no harm.
But I guess, wit' you,
Dat ain' gon' be de case!
Nous faisons l'amour
Tout les nuits,
Le canaille diable
Etl'ange sans souci.
(We make loveevery night,the mischevious deviland the carefree angel.)(Speaks.) So what d'you say?
Delta Blues starts to play and drowns out the New Orleans jazz.
Rogue: (Sings.) Ya can stop raight there,
It ain' never gonna happen.
It's too much strife,
'Cause one touch from me baby
Could end your life.
Yes, it could,
Why don't ya listen ta me?
An untouchable woman
Cain't have love,
She can pray ta tha stars above,
But she ain't gonna have it.
Gambit: We'll jus' see 'bout dat.
Gambit and Rogue join Jubilee and Wolverine in a game of pantomimed basketball.
Rogue: (To Gambit.) Yoah usin' yoah powers.
Gambit: Am not. (He charges the basketball and throws it at her. She flies backward. And then he picks her up and sweeps her backward.) Chère, I win de game. I'm gettin' a date wit' you.
Rogue: Fahne, ya win. (Gets up.) We didn't get much ova date, thanks ta Omega Red.
Anna: Things soon began to get more interesting as certain things Gambit had kept secret began to come to light. And our two lovers faced their first challenge. It started with the time-traveling mutant, Bishop...
The X-Men: Cyclops, Jean, Wolverine, Storm, Jubilee, Beast, Iceman, Psylocke, and Professor X are all gathered with Gambit and Rogue. They all greet Bishop one by one. Bishop stops abruptly at Gambit.
Bishop: LeBeau! You were the traitor to the X-Men. I should have known.
Gambit: It's très guache t'mention a body's name wit'out dat body's permission!
(X-Men #8)
Cyclops: Gentleman, that's enough. We can discuss this later.
All exit except for Gambit and Rogue.
Anna: All the X-Men had a picnic and Rogue made Gambit Cajun food complete with a blackberry pie.
Gambit and Rogue sit down and are enjoying themselves when suddenly Bishop crashes their picnic and he and Gambit get caught in a struggle. Gambit picks up part of the pie, charges it, and throws it. Bishop ducks and the pie hits Rogue. She angrily runs after them both. Suddenly, an explosion is heard, and Belladonna appears. Bishop tries to shoot her but Gambit jumps in the way.
Gambit: Stop...it's my wife, Belladonna.
Belladonna: I'm here f'r Remy LeBeau. You're needed back in New Orleans.
Rogue: Yoah what?
Belladonna and Bishop exit.
Anna: As it turned out, the evil alien Brood were possessing the children of the Thieves and Assassins and starting another guild war. So, the X-Men went with Belladonna to New Orleans to solve the problem. They were eventually victorious, but Belladonna seemingly died from overextending herself...
The X-Men appear along with some random thieves and assassins and Gambit holds Belladonna in his arms as she artfully dies. Jubilee and Rogue cry. The assassins carry Belladonna off.
Rogue: Some time later, Remy an' me got ta go on a real date. The Legacy Virus had just started attackin' mutants an' we had already witnessed tha death of Illyana Rasputin, Colossus' 'lil sister. (Gambit and Rogue sit down at a table. To Gambit.) How come ya never wanna talk about your wife, Belladonna? (X-Men #24)
Gambit: Why don' nobody know y'real name? (X-Men #24)
There is silence between them. They get up and start walking. Gambit tries to kiss Rogue, but she pushes him away.
Rogue: Ah wanna kiss ya, ya know Ah do. But Ah cain't.
Gambit: Then we don' kiss, Rogue. Simple as that. (X-Men #24)
The Delta Blues comes back in.
Rogue: (Sings.) Ah just want someone ta love,
Ah'm beggin' tha stars above...
The raucous New Orleans piano jazz comes back in and dominates.
Gambit: (Sings.) Ain' never been a good boy,
But I'll try f'r you... (He reaches out to her.)
Rogue: (Jumps into his arms á la the cover of X-Men #24.)
Ah was once bad too...
Gambit: We'll be happy as can be,
It's a Rogue f'r me.
Dat's gon' be de case.
Anna: It was a beautiful beginning.
The music ends. Gambit puts Rogue down and they go back to their mikes. Belladonna enters and lies down.
Gambit: O' course New Orleans came knockin' again soon after. My brother snuck into de mansion and b'fore a rogue Assassin shot 'im dead tol' me dat Belle was alive an' needed m'help.
Rogue: Ah demanded that Ah go with 'im, even if he didn't want me to.
Anna: To make a long story short: Belladonna had survived with her father's help. But she was comatose and needed the Elixir of Life from Candra to survive. Gambit charmed Candra into giving it to him and Rogue stayed with Belladonna. And-
Rogue: Ah touched her by accident, 'kay. Lord, Ah didn't mean to. An' I got her thoughts in mah head.
Anna: So Gambit got the Elixir and got back over to Belladonna's or his house, it doesn't make a scrap of difference really, and tried mixing it together-
Rogue: Ah tried ta tell 'im about what happened b'tween Belle an' meh, but he didn't have time ta listen.
Gambit: Rogue, whatever it is you're tryin' to say, it gotta wait...I'm gambling with Belle's life here, please! (Gambit LS '94 #4)
Rogue: I love you, Remy. (Gambit LS '94 #4)
Anna: (The scene unfolds exactly as Anna is speaking.) Then Julien, who had survived, crashed through the window and attacked Gambit with his sword, stabbing him through the hand and breaking the vials he held. He tried to squeeze the drops of the Elixir from the bedsheets, and dripped them into Belladonna's mouth. (Marius enters.) It did the trick and she was alive. Much to her father's amazement and joy.
Gambit: I handed her t'her father. (He picks up Belladonna and does so.) She couldn' remember who she was. (To Belladonna.) You live happy. (Gambit LS '94 #4) Then I took my best girl into my arms...(He embraces Rogue.) An' I tol' her...Tonight me an' you are goin' do dis town right for the last time, neh?...Long past time that you an' me got serious, chère. (Gambit LS '94 #4)
He tries to kiss her, but she pushes away and flies off and back to her mike.
Rogue: I can't. (Gambit LS '94 #4) (A beat.) Well, not too soon after, Cyclops an' Jean got married. It was so romantic. Ah caught the bouquet an' Remy caught tha garter. Of course, Ah got mah own limited series which y'all can call Gambit Limited Series version 2.0.
Gambit: Hey, dat's not fair!
Rogue: Didn't say it was, sugah. (A beat.) So Ah went down on mah annual visit ta see Cody. 'Course Belle went all crazy an' kidnapped him, claimin' she was gonna make meh pay fer stealin' her memories, which Ah didn't do on purpose.
Anna: And Gambit followed after you, you fought some assassins, had lovey moments, and had a showdown with Belle herself and Candra, who had both by then captured Gambit. You eventually triumphed despite you and Belle being temporarily de-powered by Candra. You snapped Belle out of her madness. But Cody still got killed, and Tante Mattie arranged a good bye on the Astral Plane between you two...
Cody appears. White light everywhere.
Rogue: Oh, Cody, Ah'm so sorry.
Cody: It's ahlright, Rogue. Ah got no regrets. (Rogue LS #4)
Cody exits.
Rogue: (To Anna.) Leave it ta you ta summize ev'rythin'.
Anna: In the issues to come Gambit's darkest secret was slowly revealed, and culminated in a shocking event. It all started with a kiss...
Part Three: Sinister revelations...
Rogue: Professor X's son, codename Legion, got loose an' traveled 20 years inta tha past ta kill Magneto but killed the Professor instead. He let loose a crystal wave that shattered the current time-line an' led us ta believe we were gonna die...(A beat.)Ah know how you feel about me and all, but with so little time...Remy, if things were diff'rent...did ya ever think about havin' a family or anythin' like that? (X-Men #45)
Gambit: Rogue, I learned a long time ago…there's no point in worryin' 'bout what you can't have. (X-Men #45)
Rogue: (Pulling him close.) Remy... (X-Men #45) (They passionately kiss each other, but eventually Gambit weakens and falls to the ground unconscious. Rogue opens her eyes and is greatly surprised that she is alive and to see him on the ground. She kneels down beside him.)Mon Dieu. Remy, wake up. (She shakes him. No response.)
Jean, Cyclops, and Archangel run in.
Jean: We're alive. I don't know how. (Sees Gambit on the ground.) Oh, my God. Rogue, he's unconscious. We need to get him home.
Archangel: That was some kiss.
Cyclops and Archangel carry Gambit off and he soon returns to his mike.
Rogue: Bishop had fixed tha time line in an alternate reality. Anyhow, Ah had Gambit's thoughts in mah head an' I started havin' these horrible mem'ries with people screamin' an' this crushin' sense of guilt. Ah ran away from tha X-Men, an' Ah also tried mah hand at thievin'. Iceman found meh an' we went on a road trip. Remy found us when we got ta Seattle. That's where the mem'ries lead meh...
Gambit: I knew what Rogue had absorbed an' I wanted t'stop her b'fore she hurt 'erself.
Rogue: But he wouldn't tell meh what, an' Ah didn't wanna know. (A beat)You have given me all you got…an' it wasn't enough…(X-Men #45)
Gambit: I love you, Rogue. (X-Men #45)
Rogue: Ah love you, too, Remy. From the first time Ah laid eyes on ya. (X-Men #45)
Gambit: I told 'er to absorb me again, an' know everyt'ing.
Rogue: But I couldn't do it. Then Ah left.
Gambit: A few days later, Sinister decided t'make good on my debt t'him...
Sinister appears.
Sinister: ...Soon it will be time to play the hand which Sinister has dealt you.
(X-Men #45)
He disappears.
Anna: It became increasingly evident to Gambit that he could no longer run away from his past. Psylocke had even scanned his mind when he was in a coma from Rogue's kiss, but she didn't find out anything because he blocked her.
Rogue: Tha following Christmas tha Shi'ar Empire abducted us an' several otha X-Men, an' Trish Tilby, inta space ta fight tha Phalanx who had possessed most of 'em. They nearly got meh, but Gambit saved meh. (A beat.) Get outta here, Remy! While you can! Don't throw your life away. (Uncanny X-Men #343)
Gambit: Girl, don' you ever listen? Wit'out you...I don't have much of a life! (Uncanny X-Men #343)
Rogue: We were victorious, an' were hailed as heroes. 'Cept Remy didn't wanna be a part of tha celebration. (A beat.) We boarded a craft back home, but while we were flyin' back, the shuttle got taken off course an' we landed in Antarctica. We didn't know what happened. We walked 'round in a daze, 'til all ova sudden this citadel sprung up outta nowhere. Then these bounty hunters captured us an' this odd 'bot, Nanny, negated our powers an' we got put inna cave.-
Gambit: The bounty hunters were m'old friends Spat and Grovel. I knew at that moment that I was doomed.
Rogue: Without mah powers gettin' in the way, we got real close that naght. Use yoah imagination. (A beat.) Next mornin', I told Remy that Ah loved him, but he told meh Ah couldn't love 'im 'cause Ah didn't really know 'im. The mem'ries Ah absorbed from him started hittin' meh really hard, an' Ah was soon gonna find out what Ah neveh wanted ta know.
Gambit: Spat an' Grovel came f'r me an' I surrendered m'self to 'em.
Anna: Thus began a trial no one would ever forget. The remaining available members of the X-Men, along with Maggot, had been summoned to Antarctica... (Jean, Cyclops, Wolverine, Beast, Psylocke, Archangel, Storm, Trish Tilby, Cannonball, Jubilee, and Maggot enter and are all chained in place with Magneto in disguise coming to a pulpit in front of them. Gambit takes his place at the center held prisoner by Spat and Grovel. They act it out as Anna speaks.) Magneto, in the disguise of Erik the Red, had somehow found out about Gambit's involvement in the Morlock Massacre and was going to try and execute him. He forced Archangel to be his lawyer and Rogue to testify against him. Remy admitted to gathering some bad people for Sinister, but couldn't bring himself to say more. He begged for the forgiveness of all gathered. Magneto then forced Rogue to kiss him so she could tell the rest of the story with Gambit's help. Everyone was shocked...
Archangel: You...how could you? I lost my wings. You are responsible!
Beast: Why didn't you tell us?!
Anna: (The scene continues to unfold as she speaks. The other characters eventually leave.) Rogue, using Gambit's powers and the Queen of Hearts card he had given her the night before, freed Beast. And then they helped free the others. The X-Men fought Magneto, but he caused the citadel to collapse. Psylocke shadow teleported the other X-Men out of there. Rogue flew Gambit out of the citadel, but he would not get to leave Antarctica...
Gambit: Rogue! Psylocke's over... (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Rogue: Yoah not goin' home. You ain't got no home, sugah. Not with me….not with the X men. Fend for yourself. You seem to have done a good job of that in the past...You're honest with those you love, Gambit. Otherwise...it's a gamble.(Uncanny X-Men #350)
She throws his Queen of Hearts card back at him and goes back to her mike. Gambit is slumped on the ground, hopeless and defeated.
Gambit: (To the heavens.) I'm sorry. For all de stupid t'ings I done as a pup...all de lies and de betrayal, to me an' my own. (Uncanny X-Men #350)
Anna: Well, that's a downer. The X-Men left Gambit to his death. People, you should never turn your back on a man for the sins of his past. Well, thankfully, Rogue abandoned him because of his psyche in her head telling her to do it, and not really because she wanted to. She did try to find him after she came to her senses, but she had no luck. Fortunately, the X-writers didn't let Remy die and he eventually came back...
Part Four: Back in mah arms again...
Rogue: Ah had left tha man Ah loved ta his death. Ah tried ta look for 'im in Antarctica, but Ah couldn't find 'im. Ah started havin' these awful dreams 'bout touchin' people an' drainin' 'em dry. Tha worst one involved Wolverine, an' when Sauron attacked 'im, mah teammates though it was meh. Around that time, Ah found out 'bout Dr. Agee's mutant curin' machine. Ah about took 'im up on his offer. 'Course mah mama, Mystique, intercepted an' stopped meh from makin' a big mistake. Ah had ta destroy that machine, no matter how much Ah wanted ta be normal, so it wouldn't be used on unwillin' mutants.
Gambit: Meanwhile, I about got turned into a Cajun-sicle.
Rogue: Rub it in, why dontcha? Ah said Ah was sorry. (A beat.) I just wanted ta die, Ah was so miserable. Ah was about ta give up hope, when he suddenly appeared again in that boathouse behind tha mansion...
Gambit flips around in surprise and charges some cards.
Gambit: Bonjour, Rogue. (No response.) Say somet'in'...say anyt'in', chère.
(X-Men #81)
Rogue: Gambit...you're about to blow off your hand...and don't call me "chère," sugah. (X-Men 81#)
Gambit: De Wolverine o'course showed up an' gave me "de man t'man chat."
Wolverine enters.
Wolverine: Gambit...listen good, 'cause I don't plan t'rehash this. Xavier's is a place for second chances. Even after all the lies...the trial...it's good that you're back. But...you play us all for fools, or break that girl's heart again...we're gonna have words, strong ones, you dig? (X-Men #81)
He exits.
Rogue: We tried to reconcile but a certain "green mist lady" kept gettin' in tha way. Ah didn't know for a while. Ah figured it out when Ah touched Gambit twice by accident.
Gambit: I didn' wan' tell nobody t'protect 'em. When I was starved an' close t'death, I found this green mist in th' ruins o' Magneto's citadel. Figured it'd let me survive long enough t'get to civilization. 'Course it was a young lady who wanted t'bond wit' me an' make herself a baby. She kept threatenin' t'hurt Rogue.
Rogue: Beast came up with a device ta trap 'er, an' she soon died.
Gambit: Her name was Mary.
Anna: Well, Gambit had another problem he didn't want anyone to know about. Of course they did eventually, as with most things...
Gambit: De New Sun, an alternate version of m'self...
Anna: Who gave you passage from the Savage Land and had you do some errands for him. And you're wondering, why does this keep happening to me?-
Rogue: Oh mah God, Gambit's got a new girlfriend.
Anna: Seriously, I couldn't handle him. (Gambit tries to interrupt, but she cuts him off.) I need to keep the story going or we'll be here all night. In the midst of this, Remy had an adventure going back 100 years in time to save a teenage Jean-Luc from...whatever...with his new friend Courier, AKA Jacob Gavin. He found 19th Century Sinister so he could save Courier, who had been melted. Sinister resuscitated him as a woman because he didn't know he was a man, but that's beside the point. Gambit couldn't get back to the present without some help, so Sinister re-implanted the brain matter he had removed from Remy when he was 18 and couldn't control his powers. That jacked up his power levels so he could manipulate time and get back.
Gambit: Dat's about it, but p'tite, don' try tellin' m'story f'r me ever again. You get y'facts mixed up.
Anna: That's because I never read those issues. (A beat.) The point is you could kiss Rogue!
Rogue: I met him at tha airport an' he just up an' kissed meh. An' he didn't pass out. I got a nice buzzy sensation. Unfortunately, the buzzin' soon turned inta an electric shock an' Remy was actually chargin' people's skin. He broke up with meh 'cause of it.
Gambit: 'Bout 'round then, my papa resigned an' somebody decided t'make me Patriarch of de T'ieves Guild...
Lapin and a few thieves enter.
Lapin: Y'all gotta vote f'r Remy.
Thief #1: Anyone got a bet'er sug'estion?
Thief #2: Non.
They exit.
Gambit: Ok, real fast now. De New Sun hired ev'ry assassin he could t'amp up m'powers to omega level. Belladonna showed up claimin' she was hired but dat was a lie. She jus' wanted t'sort out her feelin's f'r me. We decided t'combine de guilds an' I sent 'er home. (Anna points to her watch.) Okay, okay. De New Sun an' I had a showdown in his crystal palace, an' wit' Archangel's help an' my amped up powers I defeated him. 'Course I burned t'rough m'powers t'their normal level. Fast enough for ya?
Rogue: Amen. Ah 'bout fell asleep.
Anna: Another major problem arose at that time. Professor X had been acting crazy since the X-Men had returned from the Skrull homeworld after being captured. It turned out in the end that Wolverine had been kidnapped and replaced with a Skrull shapeshifter. The Professor wanted to find the perceived imposter so he worked the
X-Men to their limits, causing Gambit to leave. Remy soon came back with a device that would find the traitor, and one of the strangest events in X-Men history commenced: an elaborate psychodrama...
Gambit and Rogue stand on opposite ends of the stage. Kitty, Marrow, Storm, Nightcrawler, Cyclops, Colossus, X-Man, Cable, Jean and Professor X enter. Storm lies on the ground as do Professor X, Cyclops, and Jean. Cable systematically takes out Marrow, then Rogue. X-Man takes out Nightcrawler and Colossus, who takes him out as he falls down. Kitty screams and runs over to him. Gambit holds Rogue as she dies.
Gambit: I love you, Rogue. I've always loved you. You need to know that… (Uncanny X-Men #375)
Rogue: Never have worked…move on, Remy…just move on… (Uncanny X-Men #375)
Jean as Phoenix gets up and takes out Gambit who throws charged cards at her. Then, Professor X as Onslaught takes out Kitty.
Anna: Of course no one really died. But it certainly was the beginning of a rift between the X-Men and Professor X-
Rogue: (She gets up as does Gambit.) Excuse meh, this is about our relationship.
Anna: You're part of the X-Men. (A beat.) For a while Gambit and Rogue were broken up...again. Cyclops got taken over by Apocalypse so, for lack of anyone else, Rogue became team leader. She of course had to defeat Wolverine in the Danger Room first...
Rogue: Remind meh not ta try that again.
Anna: And Gambit got to be unofficial team leader of another team of X-Men, including Storm. Don't ask why, I have no clue.
Gambit: I was savin' a friend o'mine.
Anna: Gambit and Rogue's teams soon faced off against each other in a ploy to stop the Neo slavers who had intended to sell off mutants for food. Soon both teams came together and Rogue, absorbing Gambit's powers, after the leader of the Neo, the Goth, shot them down, threw a charged card and killed him. She felt awful and Gambit comforted her...
Gambit: (He holds her.) ...as far as I'm concerned, you did right. You wan' feel bad 'bout dat, your privilege. Jus' like it's mine t'hold you close an' give you comfort, for as long as you need, for as long as you want. (Uncanny X-Men #385)
Anna: That's so sweet. No one ever says romantic things to me. (Sighs.) The next part of our saga includes my favorite Romy moment ever... (Gambit and Rogue both return to their mikes.)
Part Five: On the wings of Destiny...
Rogue: Tha team had come upon tha diaries of mah otha foster mama, Destiny, that predicted tha future. They talked about how tha X-Men were gonna meet their demise, an' about meh killin' this guy named Vargas. Real strange, y'all. With Professor X all outta sorts, Storm decided ta form a team ta go search fer all tha diaries an' find out how ta stop tha awful events they predicted. Shortly before then, Ah had absorbed this dyin' Z'Cann girl who wanted ta get a message ta tha Professor. An' Ah started manifestin' ev'ry power Ah'd ever absorbed, includin' those of Cyclops and Wolverine. So Ah had bone claws comin' outta mah hands an' optic blasts so Ah had to wear glasses at all times. (A beat.) 'Ro wanted Remy ta join tha team but Ah told 'im no. Ah'd just die if Ah hurt 'im. Ah hurt his feelings, but he gave meh a really sweet present, a picture of us.
Gambit: 'Course y'all, I wasn' gonna jus' let 'er go. You could say I followed behind doin' some jobs. An' den I managed t'get framed f'r murdering an Australian crime lord.
Rogue: After a long torture session by accupuncture, a man named Red Lotus got us out an' we found out that tha Hellfire Club was responsible for tha murder. But enough with that y'all. Ya wanna get ta tha best story. Take it away, Anna.
Anna: Thanks, sugah girl. The X-Treme X-Men consisting of Storm, Rogue, Lifeguard, Sage, Slipstream, and Bishop had ended up in Madripoor. Gambit knew from Guild lore about the Madripoor Set of jewels that when collected all together would allow the bearer extraordinary power. He had managed to steal all the jewels except one, a ruby that was the only remaining possession that Storm had from her mother. She reluctantly gave it to him. However, immediately after, the general of Dimension X, an alien race that conquers other worlds, captured Gambit and Lifeguard. Gambit was chained up and, with the help of the Madripoor set, used as a power conduit for a space portal that would allow their leader Khan to take over the earth.
The other team members soon found Remy and when they were unable to free him, he told them they would have to kill him to save the world. He had some beautiful parting words for Rogue...
Gambit lies on the floor, a red light shining on him, and Bishop enters with Slipstream.
Gambit: (To Bishop. He is in a lot of pain.) When you see Rogue, tell her...tell her...mon coeur et sa coeur...toujours! (X-treme X-Men #10)
Anna: Rogue, being the stubborn gal she is, wouldn't let Remy die and had Sage increase her powers so she could control every ability that she had absorbed and flew out to save him. (The following happens as she speaks.) She destroyed the computers controlling the alien ships and fought her way to the temple where Gambit was being held prisoner. She tried to pry him free of his bonds but she couldn't and got caught in the beam. Vargas had meanwhile found the temple so he could kill Rogue. He got his opportunity and stabbed them both through with his sword. (The red light goes out. Storm, visibly injured and held up by Bishop, Lifeguard, Slipstream, and Sage enter and are horrified at what they see. They remove the sword and Rogue gets up.) Rogue didn't die thanks to Wolverine's healing factor but Gambit was close to death. Rogue seized the opportunity to get her revenge on Vargas, who had previously murdered Psylocke. (Rogue holds Gambit a moment before flying off.) Rogue told Remy not to die on her and went off. She didn't actually kill Vargas. Meanwhile a MASH unit had been set up for the injured. (Rogue slinks back and falls on the floor. Storm is also lying on the ground.) Rogue's powers began to fail and she started to bleed profusely and slipped away from the world. Jean had come along with Beast, Wolverine, and Nightcrawler to help them. Jean found Rogue on the Astral Plane, and told her that she was not dead yet but that Gambit needed her to get him back to the land of the living...
White light shines everywhere. Gambit stands up looking at the light as Rogue runs to him. The embrace each other and kiss. He is drawn to the light but Rogue keeps pulling him back.
Gambit: Rogue, please! I'm in a state of grace. I may never get this chance again!
(X-treme X-Men #18)
Rogue: Our story ain't done. (X-treme X-Men #18)
Gambit: This is the happy ending! (X-treme X-Men #18)
Rogue: Ah'm selfish! Ah want better. An' so should you! (X-treme X-Men #18)
They both fall to the ground, Rogue pulling Gambit with her. They both grab hands and find they can touch. They slowly get up and kiss each other and return to their mikes.
Anna: Beast managed to save Gambit with a micro-surgery device. However, Gambit and Rogue both lost their powers. They decided to leave the X-Men for a time and settled in Valle Soleada, CA. (Gambit and Rogue run arm in arm as if on a beach and eventually sit down as if to have picnic.) I'd like to note that around that time, Storm and Gambit had an amorous encounter when he accompanied her to a mutant conference at the presidential ranch in Texas.-
Rogue: Shut up!
Anna: Sorry.
Gambit: You jus' killed de atmosphere, p'tite.
They go back to their mikes.
Anna: Alright, Je suis canaille. (I am mischevious.) Gambit and Rogue were eventually drawn back to the X-Men. Rogue had Sage jumpstart Gambit's powers, and her own powers naturally returned. It was a very odd time for them both and would end quite sadly...
Part Six: Here we go again...
Havok, Polaris, and Iceman enter and Gambit and Rogue join them in a group formation.
Havok: Well, I'm officially your team leader now, so on to our first order of business. For those of you who don't know me, I'm Havok, AKA Alex Summers and (points to Polaris) this is Polaris, AKA Lorna Dane...
Iceman: Hi, Lorna.
Polaris: Hi again, Bobby.
Havok: Well, I guess the only ones of us who don't know everyone would be Gambit and Rogue.
Gambit: Never met you in my life. Don' tell me, you're Cyclops' brother.
Havok: Unfortunately, yes.
Rogue: Why ain't we gettin' ta tell our own story? Movin' right along. Um, Alex, sugah, Gambit and Ah wanna spend more time togetha before we go back inta action. So can we be reassigned?
Havok: Ask Scott.
Cyclops enters and then promptly exits.
Cyclops: All team assignments are final!!!
Gambit: Dat went well.
Havok: I'm not responsible for him. So, our mission is to go to China, blah, blah, blah, and get this Xorn dude.-
Anna: I am so not going there; it's way too complicated. (The team gets into battle formation and pantomime battling vines and avoiding gun shots.) So they battled the Eight Immortals and (Happens as she speaks.) Gambit tried to charge a card but his powers didn't work right, and a stray bullet hit the card, and it blew up in his face, blinding him.
Gambit screams and Rogue runs to him.
Rogue: Remy!!! What happened? Oh mah God, ya been blinded!
Polaris: We're all injured here. He can quit sniveling already.
Rogue: Damn, girl, that's cold. (A beat.) Why don't we take a commercial break an' talk about mah solo series? (Everyone else exits except for Gambit who goes back to his mike.) Tha team was drawn on a mission ta Mississippi of all places ta deal with a disturbance caused by a 'lil mutant girl. 'Course it was all a set-up by some mutant dream guy, Campbell St. Ange, who wanted meh ta stop mah Mama, my real Mama, Priscilla, from havin' these wriaths terrorize tha area. Real weird, y'all. On tha way Ah had a reunion I wasn't expectin'...
Rogue goes to a pretend door and opens it. Her Aunt Carrie enters.
Carrie: Coming. Coming. (She opens the door and is greatly shocked.) Why... Anna...Anna Marie? (Rogue: Going Rogue) (Rogue is speechless. Pause.)
Rogue: Ah eventually outstayed mah welcome, but Ah touched her ta find out what happened ta mah Daddy. Ah found out that she loved meh an' how much she hated mah Daddy. Ah soon found out 'bout how mah Mama died, but enough 'bout that, y'all. Gambit followed meh blind as he was. He absolutely hated bein' helpless. Well, he found meh inna motel room with Campbell an' tried ta punch him out an' punched meh instead. An' then Remy ran out nearly gettin' killed by a truck, rolled down a hill, an' smacked his head onna tree. At that point, dream boy, and Remy, unbeknownst ta mahself, took meh inta tha Far Banks to stop mah Mama. 'Course Remy managed ta meet mah dream twin, created by mah Mama ta keep her company, an' thought it was meh. Well, Ah convinced mah Mama ta stop her craziness an' we had a real Mama an' child moment...
Priscilla appears and holds Rogue.
Priscilla: Mah angel baby girl, I ain't never gonna leave you again.
(taken from Rogue: Going Rogue) (She starts to dissipate.) No!
Rogue: Her spirit need ta be let free. She had wanted ta destroy mah dream self, but Ah saved 'er an' made 'er a part of me. Ah then reconciled with mah aunt, who had been mah real Mama. (A beat.) Tha next part of mah series, ta make a long story short, Ah went to Japan 'cause of an incriminatin' photo of meh an' Sunfire. Ah met up with an old friend who Ah couldn't remember 'cause her power was ta erase people's mem'ries of her. She ended up erasin' mah mem'ries of bein' in tha X-Men an' I fought 'gainst mah teammates. Ah eventually came ta mah senses, but meanwhile Lady Deathstryke appeared an' chopped Sunfire's legs off. He wanted meh ta absorb him an' put 'im out of his misery. Ah didn't wanna but she pushed meh on 'im, an' he was so willin' ta die. Ah got his powers an' that's why even right now, Ah shoot flames. Gives new meanin' ta tha term "fiery Southern gal" doesn't it?
Gambit: Sage, an' dis guy Elixir, restored m'sight an' I was back in business. I had some more fun down in New Orleans. Solo series number two.-
Anna: I absolutely loved it! It was hilarious.
Rogue: Ya like him more than meh!
Anna: No, I don't. He just gets to have more fun than you.
Gambit: Friendly competition, neh? I wanted t'see if I still had de skills, so I took a job for a jolie fille stealin' a deck o' cards. Dey turned out t'be indestructible, mystical tarot cards wit' one guaranteed t'blind you f'r life. During de heist, Lilli Penrose, dat was 'er name, decided she was gon' compromise my integrity. (taken from Gambit: Hath No Fury) Nothin' really happened. Th' costume doesn' come off that easily.-
Rogue: Wanna bet?
Gambit: Have mercy, chère. A rival t'ief killed mon ami, Dan, an' o'course dere were hell demons involved in de whole story. Real mess, y'all. In de end, Wolverine helped me out, an' even when Lilli tried t'cut my heart out f'r some bizarre ritual, I had an ace in de hole. Dat's right, it was de tarot card dat caused blindness. Floored dat femme. I even warned 'er 'bout it, but de woman didn' listen. Y'all catchin' on now.
Anna: Moving right along, Gambit's little friend, Ginny, decided to send the surveillance tape of the Lilli and Remy 'hot moment' to Rogue and Belladonna. Remy retrieved Rogue's copy, but she still saw it. Don't worry, that didn't become an issue. In the second half of the series, Gambit took out some zombies, with the help of Brother Voodoo, who had been conjured up by the aunt of a young man that Remy couldn't save from being shot to death. It resulted in one of the funniest moments ever...
Brother Voodoo enters.
Brother Voodoo: In our brief time together, I've seen evidence of a personality type that's narcissistic, kleptomaniacal, pathological, adrenaline-addicted, anti-authority, and given to reckless suicidal tendencies. (Gambit: Hath No Fury)
He exits.
Anna: (Laughing.) That is so funny! And now, back to the main series and another very funny moment.
Rogue: Oh no, ya don't.
Anna: The team was called, along with Emma Frost and Wolverine, on a mission to fight this madness-inducing alien parasite called a Golgotha. They all started acting strangely...
Gambit: (Visibly nauseous.) I don' feel so well...There's dis stench like when we pulled dis boy outta de Mississippi...Been dead three days...(He throws up. Sings.) "Ol' man river..." (taken from X-Men: Golgotha)
Wolverine enters trying to attack Gambit but Rogue stops him and they soon embrace.
Anna: Things started to get even crazier as Rogue and Wolverine had an intimate moment, and Gambit said some things he shouldn't...
Gambit: Not touching is the only thing that's kept us together. It's what adds the sparkle. Without that...we'd be bored with each other. You'd be just another one-night stand...You make a perfect couple. The old lech and the maiden. (X-Men: Golgotha)
Wolverine falls down and both come to their senses. Rogue helps him up and he exits.
Anna: Rogue thought she was Wolverine for a moment and Gambit thought Sinister was attacking him. The X-Men defeated the Golgotha in outer space and Gambit and Rogue shared some sweet moments. (A beat.) More unfortunate events began happening, the next of which was when Mystique infiltrated the school in the guise of a student named Foxx. She had intended to tempt Gambit away from Rogue so she could have her fall in love with a mutant named Pulse.
Rogue: She made meh doubt tha man Ah loved even more. Once Mystique was found out, she shape-shifted inta mah form ta make Gambit cheat on meh.
Gambit: I didn' do not'ing wit' her, I swear.
Rogue: Cain't prove nothin', can you? Ah confronted her 'bout ruinin' mah happiness an' I couldn't get a straight answer from her 'bout sleepin' with Remy. An' then, ta add insult ta injury, she asked to be a part of tha X-Men. All tha senior members took a vote an' she got ta stay. She certainly didn't get mah vote.
Gambit: Didn' get mine either, Anna. I tried t'kill Mystique. Too bad Rogue stopped me. Burned m'biscuits good too.
Rogue: Remy, ya just couldn't kill her. An', honey, how're yoah biscuits? (He smiles.) Soon after, tha Scarlet Witch went nuts an' changed tha timeline to one in which Magneto ran tha world. Thankfully, it got fixed with help from Wolverine an' Emma. But anyhow, she restored tha timeline but decided to declare that there was gonna be "no more mutants." 90 percent of all mutants lost their powers. Of course, Gambit an' Ah kept our powers, but Polaris didn't an' neither did the Professor or Magneto.
Gambit: Dat was the beginning of the end f'r me with th' X-Men.
Rogue: Tha last sweet moment we had was in the Infirmary after Remy had gotten hurt fighting tha Sapian League with the help of our new security force, the Sentinels...
Gambit: (He sits down.) Il n'est rien. (It's nothing.)I must 'ave a thick skull. (Decimation: House of M: The Day After)
Rogue: Wish Ah could kiss it better. (Decimation: House of M: The Day After)
(A beat.) As luck would have it, Apocalypse decided ta show up an' help tha mutants. He even managed ta get Sunfire, whom ya could say Poccy rescued from death, ta join 'im. Sunfire became tha Horseman Famine an' attacked us all. Havok, Iceman, Remy, Emma, Cyclops, an' meh. Poccy'd even captured Polaris an' gave her back her powers. But he made 'er tha Horseman Pestilence. Poor Lorna, she's had enough troubles as it is. What Ah didn't bet on was Remy joinin' 'em. How could ya, sugah?
Gambit: I wanted t'protect you an' de X-Men.
Rogue: Instead ya nearly killed meh. That's a bad gambit if Ah've eveh seen one.
Gambit: Ha, ha, Rogue. You real funny.
Rogue: Ah wondered where he'd gone, an' then when we faced Poccy, Ah got tha shock of mah life... (Apocalypse enters and Gambit joins him as the Horseman Death with his staff. Sunfire stands nearby.) Oh...oh no... (X-Men: Blood of Apocalypse)
Apocalypse: Death! (X-Men: Blood of Apocalypse)
Rogue: Remy!!! What have they done to you?! (X-Men: Blood of Apocalypse) (She runs to Gambit and he starts attacking her and puts her in a strangle hold á la the cover of X-Men #185. He then goes to shoot gas at her when Mystique runs on with Pulse and kicks Gambit down. She gets up.) We managed ta destroy all tha antidote ta tha plague that Poccy was gonna use to wipe out all but 10 percen of humanity ta match tha 10 percent of mutants that were left. He wanted ta have a "survival of the fittest" battle. Anyhow, Ah had lost Remy an' Ah tried ta get him back but Ah couldn't...
Anna: (Happens as she speaks.) In the final battle with Apocalypse, Rogue once again fought Gambit and it looked like he was going to snap out of it. But Mystique knocked him out cold, and before anyone could do anything about it, Sunfire carried Remy away. (Apocalypse exits. Rogue sits on the floor with Pulse. Mystique stands close by.) Gambit, or should I say Death, returned soon after with Sunfire to retrieve Polaris. (Action continues as she speaks.) He then came into contact with Rogue again, and once again tried to kill her. Pulse jumped in and neutralized Gambit's powers. He weakened and he and Sunfire left without Polaris. Rogue was distraught. Pulse then tried to start a romance with her, but she wouldn't have it...
Rogue resumes sitting on the floor with Pulse.
Rogue: The love of my life just looked into my eyes and told me he wanted to kill me. So I don't wanna hear one word about romance! I doubt I ever will again. (X-Men: Blood of Apocalypse) (Mystique and Pulse exit. Rogue goes back to her mike as does Gambit.) Soon after, Cyclops asked meh ta be a teamleader. I had ta get on with mah life, but Ah didn't wanna lose faith that Remy might come back one day...
Cyclops enters.
Cyclops: Rogue, I know that losing Remy has hit you hard. I'll understand if you say no. (X-Men #188)
Rogue: Didn't lose him, Scott. We're just...he made a wrong choice, is all. But, I'm gonna be here when he comes back. Believe it. So yeah, I'm in. (X-Men #188) (Cyclops exits.
A beat.) I put Cannonball and Iceman on mah team along with Lady Mastermind, Mystique, Karima Shapandar, and Sabertooth. Ah know what y'all are thinkin'. But what were we gonna do with the baddies, have 'em terrorize tha students? Alright then. We defeated these creeps called tha Children of the Vault. Then we met tha new Acolytes led by Exodus. An' then, Ah met a certain mad scientist, who'd only seen meh once, an' he was messin' with mutants' powers and DNA. He injected meh with Strain 88 b'fore anyone could save meh. Ah passed out an' was close ta death. 'Course we defeated him first. So here Ah am, comatose in some hospital bed on Cable's paradise of Providence. X-Men issue #197, Ah think. (A beat.) Ah loved you, Remy. An' now it looks like Ah'll never get ya back.
Gambit: Don' give up on me, Anna. I'll get back to you somehow.
Anna: The end. Stay tuned for our future episode: Typhoid Mary and the Suicide King, coming in about two years I think.
