Author's Note: Hello everyone. Welcome to a very quick one-shot centered around Wario, Waluigi, and Mona. This was just a small project I whipped up so I could upload something on this site before too much time has passed. I just hate being inactive. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this short story, despite how quickly it moves by. Think of it like a montage or something.

Disclaimer: Wario, Waluigi, and Mona are property of Nintendo. But tennis, soccer, go-karts, basketball, and hanging out are property of the public.

P.S.: Pretend the bolded words have strikes through them. I couldn't figure out how to get the strikes to convert to this document. Sorry about that.


Wario: 56
Waluigi: 60

A tossed wink, a winning smile, and a quick picture. Mona leaves the two boys, off to her next class. Waluigi smirks, Wario grumbles. The competition was close, but far from over. The objective: 1000 Brownie Points. The Promised Land lies beyond that distant mark.

The competition had only just begun, but a week had passed already since it started. Neither boy was very impressive so far, but they were simply warming up at this point.

Waluigi whipped out a notepad and crossed off the first item on his list: Week 1: Compliments

Wario leaned in to see what he was doing, only to have his nose pushed away with Waluigi's foot. Wario's arms flailed furiously in resistance as Waluigi tucked the pad away and let his foot back down, allowing Wario to slam into a locker on the opposite side of the hall. Waluigi laughed raucously at him before running away, Wario's rock-hard head allowing him to take little damage from the incident.

The boys slowly became more and more extravagant with their methods. Beginning with simple small compliments, they worked up to inviting Mona to personal events outside of school. With Wario, an hour after school, one-on-one, just to talk. With Waluigi, a two-hour drive around town. Wario, a picnic in the town park. Waluigi, bowling and a late dinner. Wario, a romantic movie in his own personal mini-theater. Waluigi, talking on the phone for six hours of entertaining and intimate conversation.

Wario: 120

Waluigi: 115

Wario flexed, Waluigi tucked his hands in his pockets, mumbling. Mona took a picture before leaving.

Week 2: Dates

Now it was time to get just a little more intimate. Though the boys and Mona knew what was going on, others around the school began murmuring. Was Mona dating Wario and Waluigi at the same time? One day she would be seen holding hands with Waluigi. The next, she was giving Eskimo kisses to Wario. Another day, Waluigi hugged her from behind and whispered into her ear, causing her to blush and giggle. And yet another, Wario grabbed her hand and gently kissed it. Rumors spread around about the nature of this triangle, but the three didn't care. The competition continued.

Wario: 201

Waluigi: 200

The boys glared at each other. The electrifying friction could be felt, but Mona simply smiled and snapped a shot before leaving.

Week 3: Flirting in Public

Of course, the boys wouldn't be able to complete this competition without spending some money. They had an equal amount to spend, but it was what they spent it on as opposed to how much of it they spent that was important this week. They brainstormed silently as they walked into the mall together. Ideas hit them, and they were off. Mona was pleased. Wario got a necklace and a ring. Waluigi, a card and a single rose. Wario scoffed at the inexpensive gifts, but Mona loved them.

Wario: 290

Waluigi: 310

Waluigi bent over to properly laugh in Wario's face, who fumed, but kept himself from retaliating. Giggling, Mona produced her camera once more for a photo op.

Week 4: Gifts

A dance was coming up. The boys had to practice. However awkward as it felt, they would slow dance with each other when they were certain they were alone. They both swore they heard a click during one of their sessions, but soon shrugged it off. Their practice paid off, the dance was a success. Mona had plenty of energy that night, continuing to dance as the boys switched out to catch their breath after certain faster songs. Both were very impressive with their ability to both slow dance and match her energy for fast-paced songs. The three gathered outside just before the dance ended.

Wario: 420

Waluigi: 420

A tie. Both boys looked proud, smiling brightly. Mona took the opportunity for a photo.

Week 5: Dancing

The dance inspired something in Mona that unnerved both boys. They knew the next week would be the hardest so far, but they were up to the challenge. On top of spending hours upon hours perfecting their serenade's lyrics, they had to learn how to sing. After spending days finding the perfect lyrics, they began singing to each other to hone their voices, feeling equally as awkward as when they danced. When performing in front of Mona however, they felt comfortable, and that night, they were as good as natural-born singers.

Wario: 650

Waluigi: 640

Having already taken photos while they were singing, Mona smiled at them and left. That night, the boys didn't seem to feel conflicted at all. They simply looked at each other, even praising each other for their songs.

Week 6: Serenading

The boys were given a week off. Mona was satisfied with all their hard work over the month and a half and decided to give them a break. Wario and Waluigi decided to hang out together a bit more. After worrying about Mona for so long, they realized they hardly spent time with each other anymore. The week was spent on tennis, soccer, go-karts, basketball, and just sitting around, doing nothing in particular. The entire time they could feel a presence, but they felt they knew what was going on. Though they weren't expecting it, Mona gave them a surprise evaluation at the end of the week.

Wario: 850

Waluigi: 840

Neither of the boys knew how to react, since they weren't competing that week, but Mona giggled and waved as she left.

Week 7: Week Off

The final week of the competition had arrived. School was out for the week and Mona asked the boys to set up a camp near the forest outside of town. She would be joining later. The boys followed through and set up three tents and a small campfire on a hill overlooking both the forest and the town. The sun had set and they were roasting marshmallows over the fire, participating in small talk.

Mona approached the pair, smiling as usual and holding her hands behind her back. The competition was complete and Wario and Waluigi looked at her expectantly.

Wario: 1000

Waluigi: 1000

The results were confusing. Had they both won? Or did they lose? Their answer would be delivered by Mona.

She brought her hands to her front, holding a number of photos. She gave them to Wario and Waluigi, who scanned them intently. All the pictures were of them. The first few showed them arguing, as they often did. The pair frowned at the pictures, but eventually came upon one that showed them dancing together. They both looked up at Mona, who giggled. The boys slightly blushed before looking back at the picture. They flipped to the next one, showing them both smiling proudly the night of the dance. The next couple of picture showed them singing to Mona individually. The night flowed back into their minds. The first night they actually complimented each other after an evaluation.

All of the remaining pictures were taken during their week off. The boys slowly formed smiles on their faces, looking at themselves enjoying each other's company without Mona on their minds. Now that they looked back, that was a very good week. It was rare they just chilled out like that.

The very last picture featured the boys roasting marshmallows together. Something was written on the back of it as well:

"Wario, Waluigi, I'm proud of you. We started this silly competition to decide which one of you I would date. You started off at each others' necks, but now look at you. You're best friends. I never want you to forget that. I hope you never forget how important you are to each other, and never fight with each other over a girl again, okay?

- Mona"

Though neither boy won Mona's love, all three of them won each others' friendship. Wario and Waluigi soon learned that this was the result Mona was hoping for. The dancing and serenading challenges were meant to get the pair to talk and practice with each other, even though the act of doing so was embarrassing. The week off served only to help strengthen their bond and to temporarily forget about the competition for Mona's heart. Everyone was even now. Though, Mona had to admit, she was very impressed with both boys. Making a hint at eventually seriously dating one of them before climbing into her tent for the night left Wario and Waluigi looking at each other. As if reading each other's mind, they clamored for her tent, bumped into each other just outside of it, and commenced a fist fight for Mona's love.

Week 8: Final Results