Tekken Race

Introduction:

Pls. Review and no copying

Biography

Jin Kazama – a wealthy man, very cunning and smart. Heir to the Mishima Zaibatsu. The son of Kazuya and Jun. Likes to party all night long

Steve Fox – a world class boxer, Smart and very cocky. The only son of Nina Williams and Paul Phoenix.

Hoawarang – A master in taekwondo. A skilled mechanic in vehicles and likes to carry his wrench.(The size of the wrench is the red wrench and longest you see in a hardware store.) and whack people with it. Likes to kick Kazuya's ass. Trained in the military as a former pilot and soldier.

Kazuya Mishima – a man of many talents nooo! What am I saying; he's an asshole, a drug addict and an inconsiderate father. A good for nothing piece of shit? He does like to shove fruits where they shouldn't belong.

Heihachi Mishima – a horny pervertive sick bastard with no sense of humor! He hides a deep dark secret in his bed while he sleeps.

Paul Phoenix: a man with dreams. Desires a restaurant for bikers in the Texan state.

A very skilled fighter in street fighting and likes to play with his hair a lot.

Jun Kazama: The very faithful wife of Kazuya likes to pamper her son Jin. A very protective mother who can be very dangerous when a threat comes about.

Nina Williams: The wife of Paul a world class assassin yet she may be coldhearted. She has a big heart for her son Steve.

Lei Wulong: A badass pervertive cop, always thinking of ways to screw with Kazuya and Paul and also trying to score with their wives.

Julia Chang: A hot environmentalist who likes lot's of green. Has power to make things live.

Ling Xiayou: A cool Chinese school girl who is addicted to Jin and coffee and sweets. She likes to play with her pet panda.

Lee Chaolon: A freakin faggot, very gay. Warnings if seen do not approach unless you're a homosexual.

Chapter 1: The RACE

(At the Mishima's mansion, Kazuya burning his eyes out in front of the computer screen.)

Kazuya: They have pink cocaine in E bay. But nothing can beat the original white powder. Ohhhhhhhh! They're now selling tropical mushrooms. (Giggles) Wait, what's this they're selling a genuine World War II smoking pipe. (Kazuya's eyes turning around and around) Neeeeeed toooo haavvveee thiiiis piiippee.

(Suddenly Jin, Steve and Hoawarang came in Kazuya's room)

Jin: Hey Dad look wha…. The

Hoawarang: …the HELL are you doing!

(Jin, Steve and Hoawarang see Kazuya licking his computer)

Kazuya: Dammit! How many times do I have to tell not to disturb me in my private time you idiots.

Jin: But Dad we won something.

Kazuya: Nah that is just a piece of crap!

Jin: No it's not.

Kazuya: Jin, I am your father!. (Kazuya walks to his chair and sits.)

Jin: NNNNNNNOOONNOOOOOOOOOOO! No seriously are you?

Hoawarang: It's not crap. You sick bastard.

Kazuya: (Picks up a banana and waves it around.) Don't make me shove this banana where the sun doesn't shine.

Hoawarang: (screams like a little girl) Okay, Jin, your old man is right its just bunch of crap.

Jin: Hey! Whose side are you on?

Steve: He's in the side where Mrs. Banana doesn't meet Mr. ASS.

Hoawarang: (Angry) Are you picking a fight with me beeotch?

Steve: Hell yeah CHICKEN SHIT!

Hoawarang: That's it the gloves are off!

Steve: Ready when you are pussy.

(Hoawarang gets ready to fight Steve. Suddenly Steve throws a strong hook at Hoawarang that sends him flying to the bathroom. Hoawarang rises and charges at Steve and kicks him in the gut. Hoawarang then executes a powerful cannonball kick at Steve chin that sends him flying out of the room and into the roof of the mansion where the dojo of the Mishima's is located. Hoawarang jumps up after him.)

(On the Dojo)

Hoawarang: Let's finish this Steve.

Steve: Sure

(Steve quickly grabs a spear and charges at Hoawarang. Hoawarang brings out his Wrench and charges at Steve. As they met Hoawarang turns and parries Steve's Attack. The Wrench got hook just below the blade of the spear, Hoawarang breaks it in half and hits Steve with the wrench squarely on the face then launches Steve in the air with a powerful kick then jumps up Ninja STYLE hits Steve with the wrench that sends him flying out of the dojo and lands in the garden)

Meanwhile

(Lee is cutting the grass)

Lee: This sucks, I should be watching the fab 5. (Stands up in a girly manner) but no I have to do that asshole stepfather's dumb chores. What's even worse he doesn't pay me a damn cent. Oh I wish a man would just fall in front of me.

(Steve falls in front of Lee)

Lee: (Raises his hands up.) Thank you, Author.

(Lee brings Steve back in the house)

Hoawarang: (Comes back in the room finds Jin on the floor.) My God!

(Kazuya circles Hoawarang and shoves a fruit on Hoawarang's but. Hoawarang falls to the ground unconscious)

Meanwhile

(In the basement)

(Steve wakes up)

Steve: (Looks around) Where am I? (Sees Lee about to lick him) OMFG!

(In the front door Ling and Julia)

Ling: (pushes the doorbell while singing a poem about Jin) Oh Jin oh Jin ohohohoho. You're LingYLin is waiting.

Julia: What the hell is taking so long Kazuya's smug face should be in front of our faces right about now!

Ling: Shush Julia I'm just here for 2 things. Coffee and my one love Jin.

Julia: (Not listening to Ling. Touches the door) It's open, Ling, c'mon lets go

(Back in the basement)

Steve: Get away from me!

(Steve punches Lee on the face and sends him flying to a power conduit box. Electrocuting Lee makin the house go loco)

Kazuya: Now (Gets near the computer as he was about to press the buy button the Computer turned off) What the hell! Noooooooooo my ppipppeee! (Pissed off, Kazuya punches the computer with his strongest punch breaking it in half.) There!

(The strength of the punch caused a shockwave which makes Lee fall off the electric box. Then the lights turned on)

Kazuya: Thank you! (Looks at his computer) Noooooooooooo! (Kazuya rips of the wires and electrocutes himself, knocking him out.)

(After 3 hours)

Kazuya: (wakes up) Uhhhh

Hoawarang: Ouch my but! Like something was shoved into it. (Touches his but)

Jin: Ouch my belly like something kicked it like a wild man (clutches his stomach)

Jun: (comes in the living room) Okay wake up were gonna have a Tekken family meeting.

Ling: (In the kitchen making coffee while adding lots of cream and sugar)

Kazuya: (stands up) Even my faggy brother.

Jun: Yeah you got a problem with that.

Kazuya: No maam

(An hour later)

(The doorbell rings, outside Paul and Nina were waiting.)

Jun: (opens the door) Hey guys! Come in (Jun pushing Nina and Paul in)

(Jun turns around and screams as she sees Lei.)

Lei: Let me in sugar! (Poking Jun's breast with his silenced pistol)

Kazuya: (Comes out grabs Lei and throws him in the living room) Stay away from my wife you bastard.

(Living room)

Jun: Now let's talk

Kazuya: (Smoking marijuana. Sees Lei reaching for his pocket and brings out a bag of pot and a pipe)

Lei: Like my pipe Kazuya, I just got it from EBay apparently one person was betting but he disappeared. I took the liberty of buying it (laughs at Kazuya)

(Kazuya getting pissed attacks Lei with a Sofa chair)

Kazuya: That's my pipe you bastard! AhhhhhhH! (charges at Lei but was stop by Jun)

Jun: Now stop it honey. (waving her finger around)

Kazuya: Fine. (throws the sofa chair back and sits down)

Jun: I called you all out here because my son Jin won a wonderful thing.

Kazuya: No it's just a piece of crap.

Jun: Shut upppp! (picks up a fish and hits Kazuya on the head)

Kazuya: Ahuh! My dinner

Jun: Continue, Jin.

Jin: I won tickets for the Tekken Race!

Paul: Do we get paid?

Jin: I think so!

Paul: I'm in

Kazuya: I'm out

Jun: (Picks up a piece of ham and hammers Kazuya's Head)

Kazuya: Oww! My Breakfast

Jun: It's decided were going in the race!

(Suddenly Heihachi pops out of the sofa.)

Heihachi: I disagree, I don't want to go to a trip where a gay, freaks and pansies in a damn race around the world!

Ling: (Comes out of the kitchen bringing a coffee cart and stops in front of Kazuya.) But we need to go. Were gonna have lots of fun and best of all I'm gonna have a date with my Jinnyyy. (Gets near Jin and sips on her coffee machine) Isn't that right my boyfriend? (Jin sweats and squirms away from Ling.) Besides all you folks need a vacation, right?

Jin: (Moves silently to Hoawarang) Help Me please! I don't want to go to a date of crazy Chinese girl chugging a coffee machine for a drink.

Heihachi: No is no dammit! (Grabs Ling's Coffee machine and throws it outside) Now get out of my damn house!

Ling: BUBUB but? (Ling about to burst in tears)

Heihachi: Is it that hard to understand what's coming from my mouth or do you need a damn gorilla to tell you! (Starts acting like Ling in an idiotic manner)

Ling: I hate you! (Ling burst into tears while running out of the room and into the kitchen. Julia and Hoawarang follow her into the kitchen)

Lee: (Thinks deeply and then he stands up.) You can't do that! I can never accept you as my father! Jin, accompany me! (Lee burst into tears and runs to his room in a freakishly girly manner)

Hoawarang: Wow! Heihachi pissed of Lee and Ling faster than us! This calls for a celebration.

Jin: I'm gonna get the champagne. (Goes to the bar room)

Jun: No one's gonna accompany Lee? (Stares at everyone) Forget I ask?

Heihachi: Yeah! I'm gonna wash my hands now.(Heihachi places his hands in a pool of super glue thinking it was water)

(Suddenly the kitchen doors open wide. Everyone sees Ling carrying a rod that is attached to a teddy bear dangling inches away from a boiling pot of hot espresso)

Ling: (Hysterical look) Okay! You sick bastard we're going to the race or the bear gets it.

Heihachi: Okay we're going to the race just don't hurt my Mr. Cuddles.

Ling: (Calms down) Okay!

Heihachi: Hu thank you.

(Jin comes out holding the champagne bottle)

Jin: (Singing in a happy tune.) It's celebration time al'ight.

(Jin pops the bottle. The cork flies to Heihachi's forehead)

Heihachi: Uhhhh! (Clutches his face with his hands but they stuck together.) Ahhhhhh! Crap! Whut dya helll ish shtuk on my faceee. (Gets closer to the window.)

Kazuya: Watch out dad! (Kazuya stands but trips on the coffee cart Ling brought. The cart smashes into Heihachi's groin. Propelling him to the window)

Heihachi: (While falling of the window) Damn you Kazuyaaaaaa!

Kazuya: (Gets up casually and dust of his tie.) We will not speak of this.

Hoawarang: Let's party (brings out a keg of beer)

(As the Tekken crew parties they prepare for their biggest adventure)