This is a conspiracy theory, but since it's one of my conspiracy theories, don't take it seriously. I was just playing around with a few ideas when it popped into my head. Apologies too for the weird way it's written, it seems to fit, and if you're truly concerned I wrote it in about fifteen minutes straight after getting a haircut, so that may have something to do with it. Anyways, I'm feeling rather proud of myself because this is the first Harry Potter fic I've written that hasn't gone completely flat, so I present to you:
Harriet Potter and the Life-Changing Operation
Once upon a time, there was a boy, which is not particularly unusual because there have been a lot of boys in the history of the universe, but this particular boy was called Harry Potter. This is not a story about Harry Potter or the fact that he's a wizard and goes to a wizard school and has extremely trippy adventures… this is about Harriet Potter and her life-changing operation.
Now don't start to get any ideas about transvestites, etc, for there is a perfectly normal reason for it. For you see, Harriet Potter was Harry's twin sister, but alas, she was suffering from a life-threatening disease and had to have an operation. So Lily and James took their several-days-old daughter to the wizards' hospital, and bade her tearfully farewell, and wondered if they would ever see her again. And then they left, because they had left little Harry in the care of Sirius and Remus, and we all know how that can turn out.
Fate is a very strange person, for that very night, as Harriet was having her operation, Lily and James were tragically killed by Lord Voldemort, who in turn tried to kill Harry but instead his curse rebounded on him… and Harry was sent to live with the Dursleys. Voldemort had no knowledge of Harriet and she was, therefore, safe for the moment. The doctors were worried, however, and so after performing the operation (which went without a hitch, enabling Harriet to live a perfectly healthy life), they fiddled around with Harriet's DNA for a little bit, and then sent her to an orphan's home. They thought it was all for the best.
Harriet was adopted after a few days by a muggle couple. Her new parents loved her dearly, since they had no other children of their own, and under their loving eyes Harriet (for that is what we shall call her, although her parents gave her a new name), with no knowledge of her magical background, or of Harry, whatsoever, grew up to be a girl with bushy brown hair, a passion for learning and a tendency to get rather bossy…
And you may come to your own conclusions about Harriet's identity… but to those who write Harry/Hermione fics I say: EEEWWWW!!! INCEST! INCEST!
The end.
It doesn't make sense, I know. Blame the hair.
~Enelya
