The heat was nearly unbearable. Hot waves of liquid fire pulsed through Spock's body in tact with his increased heartbeat. His earlier attempts to suppress the immediate symptoms in meditation hadn't helped and as the captain had entered and the shaking had started he was forced to abandon them. Jim Kirk sat at the desk his eyes on the computer Spock had crushed earlier.
„Does the ceremony take long?" he asked „The one you have to do before... when we reach Vulcan."
His face showed concern and something else but Spock only saw it from the corner of his eye, he couldn't force himself to look at his captain during a conversation like this.
„It's just... what if it takes too long? It takes quite a while to reach Vulcan and I... well it won't take that long...?"
„No∼", Spock had to concentrate on his words, his lungs were burning and he was afraid of letting out a grown or gasp. „It would be illogical... The ritual is very brief..."
Somewhere in his mind, submerged in the flames of the Pon Farr his logical part questioned the fact that he was telling this to captain Kirk. A human, who wasn't even involved. Not only had he told him what the Pon Farr was, a decision that was logical as it was necessary to stay alive, but now he was going into details. Then the wild, primeval part of his Vulcan consciousness would heat up the flames, shutting out the logic and argue against; This is Jim, Jim has a right to know what's happening, Jim needs to know what's happening.
Spock stared at the ceiling listening to the battle inside him, the battle between the animalistic instinct and the analytical mind, it was clear which side would win eventually.
At the desk Kirk let out a small laugh, which send small impulses of heat down Spock's spine.
„I know, this would be a stupid way to die; because of long ceremonies..."
‚You'll be with T'Pring soon, she'll end this, rang the tiny voice of logic over and over through the flames but this thought didn't soothe them the slightest bit.
„...and I guess that's the last thing to expect from Vulcans."
He looked over to the bed; he had insisted that Spock should rather lie down, not that it made a big change in face of the Pon Farr. Kirk's eyes rested on Spock's hands and he frowned. Following his gaze the half-Vulcan looked down at them and noticed how they were shaking. He grabbed the sheets angrily, irritated about the fact that he couldn't control it with his captain around. Kirk stood up staring at his first officer.
„Spock, your fever..."
He disappeared out of sight and before Spock had fully realized that he was gone, Kirk reappeared right in front of his bed holding a glass of water.
„You must drink something, you are sweating too much..."
Spock's eyes were fixed on the hand before him, a drop oft he clear liquid trickled over cool human fingers. His eyes darted up but still not able to look into Jim's deep golden eyes, filled with concern, he stared at his captain's throat instead.
„No!" Spock said sharply making the human stop. His eyes were glued to the the steady pulsation right underneath the soft skin, the human's heart beating slower then his own but strong and steady, pumping blood that was not intoxicated by the blood fever.
„I..." Spock was mesmerized by the simple movement struggling to make his logic come up with a reason why Jim shouldn't come any closer.
Jim's body, usually warmer then his now seemed to drain the painful heat from the Vulcan and he could sense, through his blurred mind, that the human's mind was also colder then usual. To his battled consciousness Jim looked like an oasis, he just had to reach out, burry himself into this cool body, enter this wonderful golden mind and the flames... Jim!
„This is not a human fever, captain. There is no need to act as if I experience one of your illnesses", Spock managed to say as calm as possible, not letting any of this absurd thoughts influence his voice. He held his eyes shut.
„Oh. All right. Sorry, it's just what I'd do if this really..."
Jim's voice trailed of as he turned away. Spock's sensitive ears caught the rustling of his uniform and the soft steps, a sweet scent hitting him and he nearly let out a gasp.
Why now? Why did he have to be so over aware of Kirk's attraction in a moment like this? The flames raged inside of his head, screaming for him to find a reason to get Jim closer again, to get his coolness within reach, completely ignoring the faint mental link that connected him with T'Pring.
Spock knew that the fires of Pon Farr could be held in check by a marriage bond, it wouldn't let him slip into the Plak Tow as long as there still was a chance to reach his wife in time. And yet his animalistic instinct was demanding for Jim, the person whose mind was in perfect harmony with his own, the person who was closest to what he would call a soulmate. It was true, Spock felt closest to his captain, closer then to anything or anyone else in the universe and he had suspected there could be complications as Kirk had first asked him for his problem. It was hardest to keep control around him, as the symptoms grew stronger with him being closer.
But Spock couldn't; he couldn't possibly let his friend become part oft he madness.
Kirk was saying something, but the words were lost in the rushing of boiling blood in his ears. The heat and the ubiquitous presence oft he sweet scent made his whole body burn and the half-Vulcan's mind was slowly drowning in the acid of the primeval drive. Spock could taste it on his tongue, the strong beat of a human heart somewhere to the left, the presence of a familiar mind brushing against his white-blazing making his inside explode in a pain filled scream, he wasn't sure if it had stayed inside or had escaped his mouth.
The cold was there, painfully close but still out of reach, too far to provide an ease to the fire. Spock's eyes were wide open but all he saw was a blur of green, blood green everywhere and suddenly there was gold, two hands grabbed his shoulders, wonderfully cool hands and then there was Jim's face, he was worried, no, he was close to panic, his beautiful eyes stared down at the half-Vulcan.
Spock could feel him calling his name but there was no sound apart from his fluttering heart. The primeval part of him pushed everything aside taking control of his actions and the Vulcan reached out for the human's delicate neck and pulled him down for a kiss. For a few moments all Spock could think about was the exotic tasted of the lips under his tongue but then his mind snapped – Jim!
Pulling back Spock stared at the captain in wide shock. The human still clutched his shoulders and had somehow managed to climb on the bed without the Vulcan noticing it. Jim looked at him his trademark smile on his lips.
„So this is the solution. You will die if you don't... mate and I'm here with you."
He leaned closer.
„But Captain! Do you... are you even aware of... I can't let you..." muttered Spock, the flames in his blood and the proximity to the human made it hard to think.
Jim let out a laugh and brushed his fingers over the other's tight causing him to shiver.
„Spock, of course I do! I sleep with you and the Pon Farr won't kill you. What do you think I'm doing here?" He bushed his hand through Spock's hair and grinned. „And I'd lie if I say that I'm not happy about taking advantage of the circumstances."
And before Spock had a chance to reply Jim closed the gap and pressed their lips together. The rest of Spock's mind was floated by the bloodfever as he reached out to pull Jim closer. The human gasped against his lips at the sudden wildness oft he Vulcan but let him proceed.
The sweet human skin made Spock dizzy, he brushed his lips over Jim's cheek down over the jawline to the throat. Kissing and licking the exotic skin he realized how fragile the man in his arms was compared to himself.
For a second he wondered if he should pull away as long as it still was possible. He would simply wait until they'd reached Vulcan, he would mate with T'Pring and they could all forget about this. But he had no wish to kissed and be touched like that by anyone else then Jim and also the human had wrapped his arms around him pressing his body to his, making it impossible to let go.
Feeling his resistance slipping, Spock tried to touch as much of the cold skin as possible, licking the skin above Jim's collar. Why was there so little skin? He furiously pulled at the golden material and then simply ripped the shirt oft he human as if it was thin paper. He pressed his face in Jim's chest, breathing in and kissing every inch of skin he could reach. Jim buried his fingers in Spock's hair letting out a soft moan as he felt the lips over his stomach. He saw the other's dark eyes staring up at him with a feverish glint of desire.
Spock snatched Kim's waist and rolled them over, so that he was kneeling over him. Loosing his patience Spock tugged at Jim's trousers, his shaking fingers not able to perform the simple task of unzipping them. His sight blurred and he felt those hands pushing his own aside and then the sound of his own clothes rip. Jim reached out to pull Spock into a hungry kiss.
„You know I want this as badly as you need it." He whispered, his breath tickling against Spock's delicately pointed ear.
Not able to answer he reached out for Jim's face, his shaking fingers searching for the melting points. In this moment Kirk trusted his hips up, their hard groins crashing together. Later Spock wouldn't be able to tell what had happened after his vision went white.
They lay on the bed with entangled legs, their arms wrapped around each other. None oft them could move, Spock because the Plak Tow had left him completely exhausted, Kirk because each attempt to move reminded him of his aching sore limbs. That and the fact that he liked lying with his arms around the Vulcan.
Spock stared at the ceiling not sure what to say. The human had saved his life but he also could feel how contended he was with the situation. Jim's warm breath tickled the skin on his neck.
„Ca- Jim..." Spock finally broke the silence.
„Hmm?" his voice was sleepy but he smiled.
„I... am grateful for... You saved my life. I cannot possible repay you for what you have done for me."
Jim let out a small chuckle and looked up at Spock.
„There is nothing to thank me for. It was selfish in some ways. If you would have died-", his voice broke and Spock could feel a small shiver going through his body.
„It's not that I didn't want to... sleep with you. The fact that it saved your live is a nice side effect but it didn't even have to be me. If we hadn't done this now, you would have simply waited until we reached Vulcan and you would have been... saved by someone else."
Now Spock definitely saw the hint of a pout on Kirk's face. He thought about T'Pring. With Jim next to him and without the fire of the Pon Farr it was hard to imagine himself marrying her.
„I would not have wished for that" he muttered but quickly pushed the thought aside.
Now that the flames were gone he needed to regain control over his emotions.
Kirk smiled again and leaned closer.
„How do you feel?" asked Spock and stared at the faint bruises on Jim's hips and arms.
„Well I feel a little sore and the hickeys hurt a bit but that always happe- should be expected after hours of fu... well, you know..."
Spock chose to ignore the last bit. He raised an eyebrow and stared at the human.
„This is serious, I could have hurt you; I didn't know what I was doing."
„It could have could have been worse. Imagine what would have happened if you had regarded me as an enemy and chose to fight me..." said Kirk grinning and threw a meaningful glance at the crushed computer.
The image of Jim in his arms, dead and broken, flashed before Spock's eye and he tightened his grip burying his face in Jim's hair.
They said nothing for a few minutes simply enjoying each other's company motionlessly.
„And there is something else..."
Soft hair brushed Spock's nose as Kirk looked up questioningly.
„I am not sure, maybe I'm imagining it because oft he proximity. And I'm not familiar with this kind of things..."
„Say it!" Jim looked at him seriously.
„When we melded, I created a bond, a mental link between us. There is a Vulcan term for what we are now; t'hy'la."
For the splinter of a second Jim didn't know what to say and he stared at Spock confused but noticing the warm expression of his brown eyes he smiled.
„T'hy'la" he said trying out the unfamiliar word. „It has a nice sound... but what does it mean?"
„T'hy'la has no real translation in your language. But it means so much as friend, brother... lover. It is used to describe one's other half, the soulmate. T'hy'la is an ancient warrior bond, it is the strongest link a Vulcan can create."
Jim simply stared at him. Getting uneasy Spock concentrated on the mind beside him searching fort he link. It was there, not really clear as the minds it connected were already very close to each other but definitely there.
„It is there, I can sense it. I don't know how it feels like for you, I never heard of a human having this kind of bond but I... feel it. You are my t'hy'la."
A sweet smile spread on Kirk's lips and he scooted closer to Spock's face.
„This is a nice way to say ‚I love you'"
He kissed the half-Vulcan softly. Both paused in this position, tasting each other's lips until Kirk pulled away. He rested his elbow on the bed.
„I guess we should get dressed and get to the bridge. It's not good if both the captain and the first officer disappear for a few hours without notice. And Bones will get suspicious if he finds out where we've been all this time..."
He reached down to pick up his shirt from the floor and frowned as he noticed its state.
„I'll need new shirts soon..."he muttered getting up.
Spock sat up wrapping the sheets around him. His eyes followed the naked figure of his captain as he walked around looking for a part of clothing that wasn't ripped. Spock was so deepened in the sight of his beautiful t'hy'la that the sound of the ship's comnearly let his face slip into a surprised expression. Nearly.
Kirk grinned knowingly and walked over to the wall.
„Yes, Kirk here?"
„Keptin, we are klosing to Wulkan. We can leawe Warp in about half an hour.", came Ensing Chekov's voice out oft he speaker.
Kirk gave Spock one of his trademark smiles.
„There is no need to go to Vulcan anymore, Ensign. Plot the course to Altair IV!"
„..." there was silence and then: „KEPTIN? Keptin, are you serious? But we'we nearly reached Wulkan! And... and..."
The Russian sounded as if he was about to cry and Sulu said something in a comforting tone in the background.
„Yes, Chekov, you heard me. Plot the course to Altair IV. Kirk out."
He turned away from the speaker and looked at Spock.
„What's got him so upset?", he muttered. Spock raised an eyebrow.
„Perhaps we gave him to many contradictional orders in a short time."
Jim laughed.
„Yes, you're right. We'll have to come up with a reason for your sudden recovery. And it has to be a good one if we want Bones to believe it."
He stopped right in front of Spock and smiled down at him.
„You know, I feel kind of guilty for taking your shore leave away."
Spock raised his eyebrow even further.
„I do not require shore leave. This was an exception."
Jim smiled mischievously.
„No Mr Spock. Vulcans do need free time. I promise I'll take you on a shore leave as soon as possible. Then we can have a nice time full of long exceptions."
A small illogical shiver of anticipation went down Spock's spine. This experience would surely prove fascinating.
