Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 36th cycle. Now cycle 37!


"Lullaby Girls"
Sam/Rachel & Nell (OC)
Sequel to 'Personal History'

As expected, by the time they'd gone back to school, everyone knew about their Breadstix date, even the kiss. Neither of them really minded people knowing, the one thing was how they would react in Glee Club, as it contained two of her exes and one of his… The whole thing had been settled with a comment here and a jab there, after which Mr. Schuester had called them to attention. After the period was done, they were all heading out and Sam followed Rachel.

"Can we reschedule movie night to Sunday instead of Saturday?" he asked her.

"Uh, yeah, I think so, why?"

"Well it's just my mother's got me to go with them to this thing on Saturday night. She only told me about it this morning. I have to find a sitter for Nell and everything, can't bring her."

"I'll watch her," Rachel found herself offering. Sam stopped to look at her.

"Really, are you sure? I mean you don't have to, it's not a problem, I…"

"No, but I want to," she nodded. "You know I like spending time with her, and I'd do it for free," she finished with a smile.

"Deal, but I'm still going to pay you," he told her.

"But…" she started, and then he kissed her. She blinked, startled, then smiled.

"Is that my payment?"

"Part of it," he nodded with a smirk.

"In that case, yes, you definitely have to pay me," she announced. "What time do I have to be there?"

"Four o'clock?" he asked, and she agreed.

When she got to the house on Saturday afternoon, everyone was running around, getting ready. She got a hold of Nell, who'd been left in her playpen. As they were leaving, Sam came to say goodbye, taking Nell a moment. The girl must have sensed her father was leaving, as she started crying. He comforted her, handed her to Rachel so she'd feel okay once he did leave. And then it was just the two of them.

"Right, okay…" Rachel let out a breath, looking to Nell, who turned those very Sam Evans-like eyes up toward her. She'd babysat before, sure, but rarely babies, and never a boyfriend's baby. But if there was one thing Rachel could do, it was to adapt. And she knew what she wanted to do with her. "Tell you the truth," she carried her into the living room, "I don't remember the first time they told me about her, and I just knew, but I guess even before I was born, you know?" she went on as she put her bag down, took out a DVD case and put the disc into the player, all with Nell in her arms. "It's never too early with these things, I say," she sat on the carpet, putting Nell in her lap, facing the television. She took the remote and hit play. The movie began, and she could tell already the tiny blonde was good and focused. When she reached a finger out to point at the screen, Rachel beamed. "Yes, that's her, good! Can you say Barbra?" she sounded out the word for her, laughing.

They watched the movie, and as it went Rachel would tell Nell about this thing and that thing. She knew it wasn't as though she'd understand or really remember, but it didn't matter to her. Then when there were songs, of course, she'd sing along with them. Seeing how Nell would get animated just made her smile; she was very familiar with her voice now, with all the lullaby CDs she'd made and given to Sam for her… This was giving her so many ideas, like she could expand from the lullaby format and put together some CDs of other things, like musicals, Broadway…

She fed her, changed her, then got her ready for bed, though she wasn't sure about leaving her in her room, so she'd sat back on the couch, laid Nell down in her arms, with her head near her shoulder, spoke to her gently so she'd fall asleep. She'd just tell her about this and that, things of her daily life…

Somewhere deep down she did think about talking to her about the mother thing. Even if Nell was too young to realize what was happening, that she had no mother because she hadn't wanted to be part of her life; she didn't understand that this wasn't the case for everyone, didn't feel good or bad or anything about it… One day she would though, and Rachel did know about what it was like to grow up without one's mother.

But she would have told her that it was okay. She would have told her that for a time it had been really important to her to know who her mother was, to have her be part of her life. But now she got that maybe she didn't need her, not for the reasons she used to be believe.

She didn't need to tell her these things, especially if she wasn't going to remember. Besides she'd be asleep before long. Once Nell had fallen asleep, Rachel wasn't sure what else to do, especially with her lying there, over her. So she reached for the television remote and turned it on, keeping the volume very low. She wasn't sure at what time Sam would get home, and she tried to stay awake, but before long, she was falling asleep.

It felt like it should have been frightening, the thought of how the closer she got to Sam, the closer she got to Nell, too. And with Sam it was one thing. With Nell, she wondered who the baby thought she was. Did she think she was her mother? She couldn't explain to her one way or the other, not without disappearing from her life, and she couldn't do that, didn't want to. If she did see her that way, then what would it do to her if she just left? For the time being it wasn't a problem if she wanted to think it. She was happy with Sam, so who knew? Okay, maybe that was thinking ahead a lot… better leave it aside for now.

She'd fallen asleep still thinking about it, lulled into sleep by the steady rhythm of Nell's breathing so close to her ear. Her arms lay protecting the small girl… she wouldn't fall, not as long as she had her.

THE END/TO BE CONTINUED IN #785


A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.
In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are
always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!