Disclaimer: This is the spoiler of Book 11 of Fruit Basket, Fruit Basket and the characters of this fiction belongs to Natsuki senpai. But the fiction is mine, I just borrowed the character for my story.
I love her. I love her the first time I saw her. I don't know why, but I do. She is the only one that makes sense in my world. She didn't run away when she found out about my true form, she was so scared, her voice was shaking, her hands were cold and clammy, there were fear in her eyes but she looked at me and didn't see my hideous form but she was looking at ME, Kyo Sohma, the real me behind that monster that was my true form. She still held on to my hand. Maybe because she knew if she let go, I would probably never come back again. That I would not trust anyone again, ever again. Its not that she took away the pain that is eating me inside, but that's okay, I didn't expect her to fix me, no one could, but with her being there, with her smile, makes me feel much better about myself. It's not that she's not afraid to encounter my true form again, or be happy being with me, spending time with me. I just wish she would think of herself more than others, than her friends, and yes, her somehow new family if she feels that Shigure's house as her house and we are her helter-skelter new family. I got nothing to offer her but still she stayed by my side, looks happy being with me, even though at times I mean to her, well, most of the time.
"When you close your eyes, what do you think about?" Kyo asked himself, dawning on him what he felt for Tohru.
I love you…I love you so much!
When did it start? When did I start feeling this way for her, my name sounded so special when she says it, it has a special ring to it, like her voice is music to my ears. When did I tell myself, that I would do anything over and over again, if that's the only way I can see her smile? That wondrous smile that lights up her face.
When did I start loving you, that you invade everything about me, my skin, my system, my eyes, my lips and even my heart.
I would lie…I would lie to Akito, I would lie to the world, I would even lie to you…to keep you. To spend the rest of my borrowed times with you, my Tohru, my sweet Tohru.
Why did it have to be this way? Why did it have to end up this way? Why can't I keep you? Why can't I have you? Just because of what I am? A monster. But in your eyes, I'm only Kyo, high strung, irritable Kyo who hates the rat, Yuki.
You can see through me…my façade, my walls, my barriers, my masks. You've unlocked the barriers, you opened the door, you removed the mask…you look beyond my hideous form and accepted me for what I am and stayed with me. Oh, how I love you. I vowed to spend the rest of my borrowed times with you, my love, my secret love. Until I'm locked away for the rest of my life, I will spend each and every moment with you, till it's time for me to leave, till it's time for me to vanish.
I want you to remember me as someone you loved, as someone who meant something to you, someone you are fond of, and someone you are gonna miss. Oh, how I love you, Tohru. I would whisper it to you when the time comes. But, now its gonna be my secret. I will keep it in my heart for you. And you will keep my heart soon. When they take me away, I would just be an empty shell, for I will leave you my heart, I will leave you my love, I will leave you the real Kyo Sohma, the real one you grew to hold dear. Someday….one day….my heart would be yours.
Owari
