-1Monday Night F.L.A.W!
Episode One
The Fink enters the ring, carrying a microphone.
Fink - "Hello everyone and welcome to Monday Night F.L.A.W! Fucking-Loser-Ass-Wrestling!"
Random Fan - "Hey, shut the fuck up! You got a fucking lisp! Shut your fucking snake mouth!"
The Fink starts to cry uncontrollably as Jim Ross makes his way to the ring with a shotgun. He steadies the piece and blows a head stain on the mat, destroying The Fink's un-wonderful good looks.
JR - "BOOMER SOONER MOTHER FUCKERS!!!"
The crowd goes wild for the man with the lazy lip. And Jerry "The King" Lawler joins JR at the commentators table.
JR - "I see you managed to pull your face out of that hooker's pussy long enough to call a few matches. Hey, remember when you actually knew what a wrestling move was? Yeah me neither. I'll just sit here and read shit from my teleprompter while adding random syllables to words that are extremely easy to pronounciate."
King - "Yeah JR. I got puppies on the brain! I wanna fuck some puppies!"
Random Fan - "That's bestiality, mother fucker!"
Triple H's music hits.
JR - "Here comes Mr. Battleship, Mr. Monopoly, Mr. Chutes and Ladders, Mr. Candyland, The Game, Triple H, cause his name is three fucking H's!"
King - "Right, JR. And his wife has some huge puppies!"
JR - "Well, they're not dauschsands, that's for damn sure!"
King - "I know, they're Beethoven dogs."
JR - "What the hell is a Beethoven dog?"
King - "You know, the dog from that Beethoven movie."
JR - "That was a St. Bernard, it's not called a Beethoven dog."
Random Fan - "Do you fucks actually talk about wrestling, or perhaps, call a fucking match?! Triple H and Mankind are already in the ring and the bell has rung! Pay attention!"
Triple H and Mankind lockup, which would obviously look to go in Triple H's favor, but since all his muscles are just leftover titty implants from Stephanie, he's overtaken by Manny! Mankind kicks HHH in the gut and goes for a DDT, but HHH drops him with DVD and puts him in the STF and gives him some STD's.
JR - "Wow, that was a great combination of holds right there that was!"
King - "Huh? Oh, I was mesmerized by Mankind's puppies! I want some puppies!"
Triple H goes to the outside of the ring and grabs a sledge hammer from underneath the ring.
JR - "Oh my god! He's got a damn sledge hammer! I didn't see that coming! Not at all!"
Random Fan - "What?! He does that every fucking week! The fucking sledge hammer actually receives a fucking paycheck! Do you even pay any attention?"
Mankind catches HHH from behind and hit's a side Russian leg sweep on the concrete. As HHH attempts to get up, Manny grabs the top part of the steel steps and drops them on HHH's kneecap, which pops completely out of his leg and smacks into a fan's face.
Fan - "Oh shit! Oh shit! I just caught Triple H's kneecap! I'm gonna sell this mother fucker on e-Bay!"
HHH - "Wait, I need that!"
Fan - "Shut the fuck up! You probably got some extra kneecaps stuffed in that fucking elephant trunk of a nose you got! Suck it!"
From out of nowhere, HBK super kicks the shit out of the smart-ass fan and retrieves HHH's kneecap.
HHH - "Thanks, I don't know what I would do without you."
HBK - "Um… I actually didn't work here for four years… you did a bunch of shit without me."
HHH - "It was figurative, Shawn. Sheesh! Just grab a seat and watch me kill Mick!"
HHH pops his kneecap back into place and clotheslines Mankind to the ground. HHH picks up his sledge hammer and swings full force, smashing into Mankind's head, splattering blood and brain all over the surrounding area. HHH raises his hands in joy, but someone else's music hit's the arena and out walks…
