I'll be updating A Flight To Remember soon. I just had to get this out of my system. I think this one is going to be so much more interesting.
Disclaimer: I don't own House.
Chapter One – Loneliness
The alarm buzzed, echoing off the walls as it intruded on the silence of the room. It was six in the morning. Doctor Lisa Cuddy turned it off immediately. She had been awake for nearly an hour already and loathed that it was time to get up. Cuddy had spent another sleepless night in her office for the third night in a row. She had spent as little time at her house as was possible this week. It was big…and empty. She had no desire to be there alone.
Lisa Cuddy had gotten used to being alone by immersing herself in her work, but this week had been exceptionally slow at the hospital. Her unruly diagnostician hadn't had a case in weeks, and therefore had no reason to barge into her office seeking approval for some insanely dangerous procedure. This also meant she had no lawsuits or patient complaints to tend to. But she did long for the interaction. She craved the challenge that was a typical day at Princeton-Plainsboro Teaching Hospital.
She had felt invisible this entire week. No one needed her. So, she walked the halls unnoticed for five days now. It was frustrating beyond belief. As she walked to the locker room for a quick shower, she was overcome by the realization of just how lonely she truly is. She has no one at home and no one at work. Suddenly she felt very small and very cold. Walking the big empty halls, she couldn't have felt more insignificant.
She took a long, hot shower. She was in no hurry to return to the confines of her office, just to work her way through mountains of paperwork. She let the hot water soothe her muscles, which ached from the nights of tortured unrest on the stiff cushions of her office couch. She rubbed her neck, trying to release the tension building there, giving her an intense headache. She let the water run over her body until she felt the temperature drop as the last bit of hot water streamed from the faucet.
She stepped from the shower stall, wrapped a white towel securely around herself and went to her locker. She sat on the bench staring at the contents hanging in the space before her. She had packed her essentials for spending the past few nights at the hospital, but she was down to her last suit. She would have to return home tonight. No more hiding, trying to escape the loneliness that was her life.
She dressed in the gray skirt and lavender top, leaving the jacket hanging in the locker. She went to the mirror. She cringed when she saw her reflection. She looked as drained physically as she felt emotionally. She dried her hair letting her curls flow loosely about her shoulders and applied an excessive amount of makeup. When finally satisfied with her appearance, she left the locker room and headed toward her office. She held her head a little higher, feigning the confidence that should be exuded by a woman in such a position as Dean of Medicine.
It was nearly seven o'clock when she reentered the hallways of PPTH. Shift change. The hallways were quiet, like they were an hour before, but now they were void of all staff as well. Doctors and nurses were likely in the lounge. Some were inevitably just walking in, ready to start their days at the hospital. Others were ending their shifts eager to get home to kiss their kids or spouses goodbye before they headed off for school or a normal nine-to-five, completely unaware of the envy their boss, Lisa Cuddy, had for them. She let her mind drift there. She so desperately wanted someone to be waiting at home for her. She wanted to kiss a man, a child, goodbye. She wanted someone to care when she spent the entire night at work. She didn't want to go unnoticed anymore.
She was so engrossed in her thoughts and feeling sorry for herself, that she nearly tripped over the cane that was carelessly angled across the doorway to her office. She was taken aback by the sight before her. Dr. Gregory House sat in a chair outside her office. His head was leaned back against the glass of the window and his eyes were closed. His legs were stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankles and his arms were crossed over his chest. He looked like he was sleeping. Fortunate for her, he did not see her nearly fall over his cane. He didn't even open his eyes.
For a moment, Cuddy considered leaving him there, ignoring him and going about her business. She did miss his presence and the comfort of the confrontations that were their conversations, but now probably wasn't a good time for that sort of interaction. She would have left him undisturbed had she not realized that he wasn't due into work for another two hours, which meant she shouldn't expect him there for about three. She cleared her throat and kicked the underside of his left shoe. He opened his eyes.
"Dr. Cuddy. Good morning." He said scrubbing his hands against his face.
"What are you doing here, House?" She asked looking down at him, arms crossed. "You shouldn't be here for at least another two hours, and judging by your appearance, another hour of sleep would do you good."
"I just had a sudden urge to come see you. Are you complaining that I'm here early, Dr. Cuddy?"
"There is plenty here for you to do. I'm sure they could use you in the clinic. Why are you sleeping outside my office?"
"This chair is so comfy, I couldn't resist." He said sarcastically, tapping the metal arms of the chair beneath him. "The clinic is deserted. No sick people this week. Thank God." He drawled, looking upward.
"Then, again I ask, why are you here?"
"I'm bored."
"I'm sure I could find something for you to do."
"My shift doesn't start 'til nine. I'm all yours 'til then." He wagged his eyebrows in a suggestive manner.
Cuddy rolled her eyes and smiled. "If you don't want to work, go home, House. I am busy here. I don't have time for this."
House followed her into her office and watched her sashay to her desk. She could feel his eyes on her. She would never admit it, but it was refreshing to have him in her office ogling her. It was familiar, and hopefully a sign that things at the hospital were on their way back to normal. She took a seat behind her desk and rifled through some paper work, not really seeing any of it, as she was concentrating on House leaning against the other side of the desk.
"Can I help you, House?" She looked up at him, not surprised to find his gaze locked on her cleavage.
"Yeah, actually. Lean forward just a little bit. I don't have the best view of the funbags from here and they are just screaming 'look at me'."
Unable to suppress the smile her lips were forming, she shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Go find some work to do, House."
He adopted an offended expression. "You wear the teeny tiny little shirts, and complain when you have my full attention. What's a man to do?" He stuck his bottom lip out in an over-exaggerated pout and turned to leave. She smiled to herself as she watched him limp slowly, head hung, from her office.
She shook her head and forced her attention to the paper work that had accumulated on her desk. She was satisfied. That was a welcome little bit of normalcy back in her life. Maybe she wasn't as invisible as she felt. She was still rather confused, however. She was fairly certain House and his team were still without a case, and he hadn't asked for anything when he was there. They had had a pointless conversation about nothing. His little visit had peaked her interest. She would have to find him later to find out what was really going on.
………………………………………………………………………………………………
Nearly two hours had passed before Lisa Cuddy had filed the last of the paperwork and stepped back out into the hall. She put on her best 'woman on a mission' face and headed for the elevators, hoping not to be detoured. Her efforts were in vain.
"Dr. Cuddy. Wait up." She heard a familiar voice call after her. She turned in time to see Wilson take his last few hurried steps, catching up with her. "Hey."
"Dr. Wilson." She nodded in greeting. "Can I help you with something?"
"Are you busy?"
"I need to find House. Why?"
"Oh, okay. Nevermind then. House is with the Coma patient. If you hurry you can find out on your own what I came to tell you."
"What is he doing?" A sudden wave of anger washed over her and her face turned red. He had given the poor, unconscious man a migraine before; there is no telling what he may be up to.
"Well, if Coma Guy can hear him, House is probably boring him to death. You'll see what I mean."
"Thanks, Wilson." She turned on her heal and headed deliberately down the hall to the patient's room. She slowed two rooms down from where she was headed, walking silently so as not to alert House to her presence. She caught the last bit of the one-sided conversation House had been having with Coma Guy and was astonished at what she heard.
"…I'm just not the kind of man a woman wants to wake up next to every morning, you know?" She heard him stand and stopped dead in her tracks. "Hey, thanks for listening. I should get back to work before the boss lady catches me in here again." Cuddy ducked away into another room just as House emerged into the hallway. The blinds were closed but she watched through a tiny gap as House walked by, oblivious to her presence. She had to find Wilson.
Cuddy silently emerged from the room. She watched as House disappeared around the corner, then proceeded along her original path toward the elevators. She pressed the call button and tapped her foot impatiently while the elevator made its way ever so slowly to her floor. The ride from the first floor to the third was agonizingly slow. As soon as the doors opened, she raced, as fast as her heals would allow, to the oncologist's office.
"Why didn't you tell me he was having a heart-to-heart with an unconscious patient before you sent me blindly down there?" She blurted as she barged through the swinging glass doors.
Wilson looked up from the papers on his desk. "I wanted you to hear it for yourself."
"A little warning would have been nice. How am I supposed to react to that? I know how to deal with Pain-In-The-Ass House, but this…" She began pacing around the office.
"What did you hear?"
"Oh, just that no woman wants to spend their life with him."
"Cuddy, I'm worried about him. He's been acting really strange. I heard him talking about how lonely he his. I've never seen that side of him. I think he was early today because he is craving some company."
"Does he know you know?"
"No."
"Good. Don't say anything about it. Okay?"
"Okay."
"I'll talk to him."
"Okay, just be careful. I have a feeling he is really fragile right now."
Cuddy nodded and left the office. She turned left, and before the courage to confront House left her, she entered his office.
"Miss me already?" House asked when she came in.
"Terribly." She answered sarcastically. "Did you want anything in particular this morning?"
"Huh?"
"You came to my office. I kicked you out. What did you want?"
"Oh, that. Nothing. Hey, do you want to go out for drinks tonight?"
"Are you asking me on a date, Dr. House." She smiled down at him.
"Not at all." He gave her a wink. "You know me though, I'm gonna need a designated driver, unless you'd prefer I drink all by my lonesome. Should I tell you now not to expect me at work tomorrow?"
"You want to go right after work?"
"Unless you have some sort of objection to that."
"You have clinic until five o'clock. Not a second earlier, House." This was clearly a command.
"Of course." He agreed, knowing full well that the clinic was dead today and it would be way too easy to escape into an exam room with his Gameboy and wait out the hours.
"I'll drive, then. See you at five."
Cuddy strode out of House's office, not quite sure what to think. They had been friends forever, colleagues almost as long, and they had never gone out just the two of them. Did she agree to this too readily? She was stopped when she passed Wilson's door.
"Well?" He called to her. He was still seated at his desk.
She stuck her head inside the office and whispered, "We're going out for drinks tonight."
He shot her a quizzical, somewhat confused expression.
She shrugged, returning the look.
