A/N:
Before I start, I want to thank my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, for giving me the idea for this story. Without His influence, I know that this would have never been done. I thank You for blessing the works of my hands, so that whatever I put my hands to, I am blessed. I give you the thanks and honor right now, in Your Holy name, Amen!
Hey everyone! Here is the first part of my "Hanna-Barbera Head Dumps" that I promised a while back. I've already updated my profile so you can see it under the list of current projects. This was originally going to be four chapters long, but it turned into six when I saw that I'd have to jam-pack everything into four chapters.
This kind of came about after watching the Galaxy Goof-Ups on YouTube, since I couldn't find episodes of Yogi's Treasure Hunt anymore. Many who watched it said it was crap and one of the worst cartoons Hanna-Barbera ever made, and I've heard there were many during that time. But being a person who always looks for the positive in something, I checked it out for myself and ended up liking the series for its oddball style (even though I will admit the animation wasn't spectacular at all).
I wanted to do a story about Snerdly and the Goof-Ups' wacky adventures before, but soon a darker story along the lines of "What would happen if the Galaxy Goof-Ups screwed up big time and there were major consequences?" popped into my head. The result: the story you see before you now, which ended up being so much longer I had to do the same move I did for Redemption and break it up into many chapters. This is also my first attempt at writing a sci-fi story with a blend of fantasy elements and some humor, and there will also be tragedy. You'll see that some things have been inspired by Star Wars, what with the Empire and Rebellion theme (a reason why I love the original trilogy) and The Clone Wars-esque space battles. I'm trying my darndest to not steal the Imperial-class Star Destroyers and put them in my story. :)
I'll probably be updating this story every few weeks. After that, I'll be getting back to work on Fiery Heart, Broken Soul, Redemption: The Story of the Last R.O.B., and Sodor Magic Crusaders, since I kind of have my inspiration back for that story and I want to really finish chapter 13.
Well, enough of my rambling. Here's the story!
Prologue
Galactic Federation D-class Warship Vitalization
Sector Alpha
In the deepest, darkest parts of space, the D-class Warship cruised by, the engines giving off a low hum. The name of the ship, the Vitalization, was etched across its prow in blocky black letters. The tuning fork like prongs of the ship were aglow with white and blue lights as its fighters, having come back from their daily patrol docked safely inside its hangar bays.
The captain of the ship, Captain T.C., sat in the bridge, watching as his crew members were bustling about making sure the ship was running smoothly. The expanse of space was a welcome sight compared to the confinement of his hospital bed months ago, when he'd had a serious accident. He'd practically made an Olympic track record that day with how fast he'd run out of the hospital.
"Here you are, T.C. Two shots o' cream, as you like it."
Top Cat turned his chair around to face Fancy-Fancy, his intelligence officer and second in command, as he brought a tray of coffee and donuts.
"Thank you, Fancy," Top Cat said, quenching his thirst with the sweet caffeinated beverage. "Ah…on days like this, I could use a pick-me up."
"Things seem to be running kind of slowly around here, T.C. We haven't had any trouble on our sector for months."
"I'd say close to a year, since I was in the hospital," Top Cat replied, reaching for his donut. "In a few weeks, it'll be shore leave. Got any special plans?"
"Hmm, not really. Other than hitting up dames at-"
Fancy-Fancy was promptly cut off when alarms blared all throughout the ship, bathing the bridge in red light. Similar alarms rang out everywhere else on the ship, signaling that this was no normal turbulence. He could hear the airlocks on the starboard side of the ship sealing shut, and knew immediately that this was an invasion.
Top Cat jumped up so fast, he almost spilled his coffee. "Benny! What's going on down there?!" he yelled.
The blue furred cat known as Benny the Ball looked up from his control pad below. "We've got a whole fleet of unknown ships entering our sector! A lot of them!" he reported.
"And from the looks of it," Choo-Choo said, "they don't look friendly…"
There was a loud boom as five large warships, each rivaling the Vitalization in size, emerged from the other side of space. The ships were black and purple in coloration, and the six prongs in front of them were in the shape of scythes. Dozens of screams tore through the air as the command ship unleashed several volleys of missiles. Blue and white tails of fire streaked towards the bridge of the Vitalization.
"Raise the shields, and then fire our homing missiles at those ships!" Top Cat ordered.
"On it, sir! All hands on deck!" Fancy-Fancy yelled. Those who were still slacking around raced towards their posts.
"Shields raised!" Benny called, and not a moment too soon. The windows were filled with blue and white light, and explosion after explosion rocked the Vitalization like a battering ram. Top Cat and the rest of the crew had to hold onto something in order to keep themselves from tumbling down the deck. The ship shuddered as the rest of the enemy missiles hit the rear and the sides.
"Firing missiles!" Spook pressed several buttons on the control pad, and four large missiles launched from the underside of the ship. They homed in on the bridge of the command ship, and an explosion of yellow and orange fire occurred moments later. The ship soon started to sink into the vast ocean of space, but the other ships in the flee moved forwards, and volleys of laser fire came from their forward mounted cannons. The blasts struck the ship head on, and smoke filled everyone's vision as the command tower was hit.
"Brain, damage report!" Top Cat said, pointing to the lower deck driver.
The small, dopey feline studied the ship's hologram on the monitor for a moment, which was blinking red.
"Brain, we don't have time to dawdle! This could mean life or death here!" Fancy-Fancy yelled.
"Uh, it's not looking too good," Brain said finally. "We got hit pretty bad. I think it's saying, uh, that those missiles hit the secondary weapons."
Top Cat felt his blood turn to ice. "I think we're in trouble."
"Should we, like, retreat?" Spook asked.
"Yeah. Yeah, that would be a good idea right about now," Top Cat said. "Everybody, prepare to head to lightspeed!"
Everyone jumped into their seats, setting coordinates for home base. After receiving confirmation from Fancy-Fancy that the coordinates were set, Top Cat pulled the lever downwards, and waited for the ship's Hyperdrive systems to kick in.
There was a loud hum as the engines started…and then there was a moment of feedback, which sounded like pounds of gravel rolling in a can. The engines sputtered and fought to come back to life, but died away with a pitiful scratch.
"Hey, what the heck's going on here?" Spook asked.
"Uh, I forgot to mention that they also hit the Hyperdrive systems," Brain said.
"You mean to tell me we can't go to lightspeed?!" Top Cat yelled.
"Uh, yeah."
"We're in trouble," Top Cat muttered.
Choo-Choo reported, "T.C., the lead ship is attacking us from the side!"
Top Cat then noticed that the lead ship that had opened fire on them was no longer in front of them, and cursed his panicking. He should have seen that-
There was a loud crash, and then an explosion as the missiles blew a hole clean through its side. Crewmembers screamed in terror as they were pulled into space, and gunfire quickly filled the crew's ears.
"I think they're, like, attempting to storm the bridge!" Spook said.
"Men, get your weapons ready. I don't know who these people are, but they aren't going to take over my ship!" he ordered. With that, everyone pulled out their pistols, loading them with stun bullets, and prepared to fire.
Small, sharp footsteps resounded through the ship, and the next thing everyone knew, the doors were blown right off, sending large pieces of steel crashing into the lower deck. Brain and Choo-Choo ducked to avoid getting crushed.
When the noise had died down, a raspy voice said, "Well, now. This is new. I had expected to find the original captain who'd sealed me away."
Top Cat and his gang looked up at the intruder, and their faces were filled with disbelief. Standing before them was a human who was so old, "ancient" might as well be a compliment. He was only a foot and a half taller than Top Cat, and his beard, long and smoother than silk, reached down to his feet. His hair was just as long, if not longer. He wore black, green and purple robes, and he had a staff that was taller than he was; the rod appeared to be made out of bones, and a brilliant purple amethyst crystal sat in the center.
Milky white eyes stared into black ones. The ancient one's features curled into something that was not a smile.
"Then again," he said, "he wouldn't have lived longer than me, of course."
"Who are you, old man, and what are you doing on my ship?" Top Cat ordered, taking charge.
The man stared down at Top Cat, his expression flat and unchanging. "Ah, yes, of course. I should introduce myself," he said. "I am Donkirk, known as the Master of Manipulation. I was sealed away a long time ago, forced to watch as my empire was destroyed piece by piece by the Galactic Federation." His eyes sharpened, and Top Cat could feel the evil resonating from them. "And now…it is time I have my revenge."
"H-Hey, look oldie, you're probably just a little loopy," Top Cat said, feeling very uncomfortable around this man. "Why don't you just take your fleet and get-"
His sentence was cut off abruptly when Donkirk, at a speed nobody at his age should be able to go at, grabbed him by the throat and held him in the air by his neck. Donkirk's eyes shifted lazily to each member of Top Cat's crew as they cocked their guns, aiming at the old man.
"I wouldn't kill him if I were you," Fancy-Fancy said.
"I am sorry to inform you of this," Donkirk said, his grip tightening on his staff, "but in my path for revenge…deaths are necessary."
There was a loud clack as the butt of Donkirk's staff hit the floor. The room went a light with purple lightning, filling the bridge with the smells of ozone and singeing fur. The roar of the attack drowned out Top Cat's and the gang's screams as they were electrocuted, as well as Donkirk's laughter as he watched them suffer.
The attack was over in a matter of seconds, and the room returned to normal. Spook, Brain, Benny, Choo-Choo, Fancy-Fancy and Top Cat all hit the floor with a thud, smoke rising off of their fur. Donkirk stared at their limp forms and then turned towards the command deck. He threw Top Cat's coffee and donuts off of the deck, sending the contents crashing on top of the unconscious captain. The old man's smile was wicked as he flipped open the cover of a large red button, and pressed it.
"Let's see if they will come to their aid, as they always say they do," he said.
The button he pressed did three things, all in rapid succession.
First, it alerted all personnel that the ship was under attack. Not that they would hear it anyway, as the other personnel had been killed.
Second, it activated all security systems in order to keep the items stored away under lockdown.
Third, and most importantly, it sent out a distress signal to the Galactic Federation's headquarters. The second they got it, they quickly notified a certain group of authorities to take care of the problem.
One such group was Captain Snerdly and the Galaxy Goof-Ups.
(There is no room for failure.)
Iheartgod175 presents:
Galaxy Goof-Ups: The Return of the Phantom Empire
Tags: Sci-fi/Tragedy/Dark/Adventure/Humor
Rating: T (for dark themes, tragedy, violence and psychological torture)
Summary: The galaxy as a whole is under attack when a menace sealed away ten years ago is awakened and has started to take over systems. This menace is Donkirk, a powerful wizard who was the ruler of the former Phantom Empire, and he seeks his revenge on the Galactic Federation for destroying his empire. The Galaxy Goof Ups are called onto the case, but when their bumbling puts Snerdly into the hands of the enemy, the team could be facing serious consequences as a result of their constant failure. Galaxy Goof-Ups fanfic, and obviously much darker than the original show. Part 1 of my Hanna-Barbera Head Dumps.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of the H-B characters used in this story...just my original characters that came from my Iron Chef fanfictions.
THE RETURN OF THE PHANTOM EMPIRE
PART 1: The Menace of Old
Galactic Federation Registered Planet: Trion
Ditzy Doo's Disco Mania
"I'm like a hot air balloon that could go to space…"
"Huck, I am never going to be able to listen to that song the same way again."
"What's that supposed to mean, Cap'n Snerdly?" Huck asked, indignant.
The commander of the Galaxy Goof-Ups, Snerdly, watched as three members of the team-Yogi Bear, Huckleberry Hound and Scare Bear-were busy cleaning up their disco club. It was pretty much the only thing they could do consistently and competently. Snerdly could only pray they could carry that same dedication over to their jobs.
"Never mind. I've just got nothing better to do right now, other than to wait for trouble to happen," Snerdly replied, toying with his coffee mug. Right now, anything would be better than having to listen to Huck butcher more songs.
"No need to worry about that, Cap. There haven't been any reports of trouble for weeks," Yogi pitched in cheerfully. "You know what that means, gents!"
"Disco party all week!" everyone said, high-fiving each other.
Snerdly felt his hopes for any excitement go lower than the bottom of the sea. "Oh, joy," he groaned, his head hitting the desk.
He was almost relieved when he heard the alarms go off.
The Galaxy Goof-Ups did just what all normal, highly trained patrolmen are supposed to do when there was an emergency: freak out and run around in circles, dropping everything they were doing and generally messing everything up. When they finally met in the middle, they crashed into each other, spilling cleaning materials all over themselves.
Snerdly was about to scold them again when he heard fast footsteps approaching. The looks on the other Goof-Ups' faces told them that they knew who was coming as well.
"QUACK-UP ALERT!" everyone yelled, and pulled on helmets just as the fourth member of the team, a hyperactive, crazy duck named Quack-Up, skidded into view, kicking up a massive cloud of dust behind him. When the dust cleared, Quack-Up was right in front of Snerdly, bombarding him with random chatter.
"Yes, sir, Snerdly, sir! Reporting for duty, sir! Ready to make myself useful, sir!" he babbled.
"You can make yourself useful by BEING QUIET!" Snerdly yelled, having enough of the incompetence from this group. Upon seeing how hurt the duck looked, he paused and calmed himself down. "N-N-Now team, I believe it's time for you to head off to base, and see what the trouble is this time."
Huck looked around at the now dirtied disco club and sighed. "I reckon we'll have to clean this up after we're done," he said.
Snerdly facepalmed. "You can worry about that later, you nitwit. Now GET GOING!" he said.
"YES, SIR!" With that, everyone took off running for the base…and ran right over Snerdly, leaving him in the middle of the club in a mangled mess.
He groaned to himself, tapping his fingers on the floor. "Mom was right about me just joining the Space Corps."
Space Patrol Base of Operations
Several moments later
"So, what do we have here, fellers?" Huck asked when he finally got to the base. Yogi, Scare Bear and Quack-Up were already at the computer, tracking down distress signals.
"It looks like an enemy army attacked an important warship in the Galactic Federation," Yogi replied. "It's the Vitalization, from the looks of it."
Scare Bear took a look at the ship closely. "Yeah, that's definitely it," he said. He then jumped out of his chair, screaming in fright. "W-Who would attack a well-known warship?!"
"It looks like that ship right over there," Huck pointed out, pointing out the large black and purple ship that had docked with the Vitalization and practically dwarfed the ship in size. "I can barely make out the name…"
"Were there any casualties?"
"Working on it now, Yogi! Will have it out soon!" Quack-Up said, hitting buttons with all the proficiency of a monkey on a typewriter.
Yogi sighed. "This could take a while," he groaned.
"Actually, it didn't really take that long, Yogi," Huck said. "Look at what Quack-Up's pulling up on the computer."
Yogi and Scare Bear walked over to the computer, watching as pictures of a massive space battle filled the screen. Five large ships surrounded a smaller, silver ship, fire rising from the left of the side. Streams of cannon fire ripped through the air and struck the ship, setting most of it ablaze. Holes the size of the Moon were visible on the sides and the prow of the ship, and Yogi could have sworn he'd seen some people floating in the midst of space. He swallowed back bile in his throat. He didn't want to think of the worst.
"There are some more images I've found," Quack-Up replied, typing some more on the keypad.
"I reckon you oughta move on from that picture right there," Huck said, stating what everyone else felt.
More images relayed on the screen: the undamaged ship moments before the attack, then terrified crewmembers being chased by a battalion of soldiers, and then an old man standing at the bridge of the ship, talking with Top Cat. The next picture made Yogi and the rest of the Galaxy Goof-Ups stare in utter horror. The old man had moved to the control deck, and Top Cat and the rest of his crew were on the floor, their forms limp and their fur singed as if they'd been electrocuted. The old man's smile was inhuman as he pressed the ship's emergency contact button, as though he were anticipating the Galactic Federation's response.
"Do...d-d-do you think they're..." Scare Bear gulped. He couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence.
"No." Yogi's answer was practically growled. "If I know Top Cat, he'll be back on his feet in no time and clawing that man to pieces."
"I sure hope he and the rest of the crew are alright," Huck added. "I don't like the looks of this old man..."
The images on the computer disappeared to reveal Captain Snerdly, who looked disheveled and very annoyed. His gaze was patronizing as he glared at the Galaxy Goof-Ups.
"Gentlemen," he stated, his voice layered with forced calm, "I hope you've finished gathering your information."
"We were just about to contact you, Captain Snerdly," Huck answered, "and we've found something really disturbing."
The look of annoyance on Snerdly's face disappeared in an instant, replaced with concern. "What do you mean, disturbing?"
"Well, we tracked down the distress signal, and it turns out the Vitalization was captured. We can't tell who the enemy is, but whoever it is somebody who has a lot of money," Yogi reported, "because their ships are massive. They made the Vitalization look like a toy boat!"
"Were there any casualties?"
"Not from what we can tell," Scare Bear said, "t-though...Captain Top Cat and his crew were unconscious on the deck. They were possibly...e-e-electrocuted by the leader of the attack."
Snerdly's face melted into utter horror. "Electrocuted?! By who?! Who could have done this?!" he demanded, the forced calm gone from his voice.
"It was this old feller in the picture," Huck said, and Quack-Up sent over the picture of the old man in the ship's bridge. Snerdly looked at the picture, and the color drained from his face. He sank into his chair, his eyes wider than dinner plates.
"Ca-Captain?" Scare Bear asked, worry in his voice. Everyone stared at their captain with equally worried expressions.
Snerdly couldn't answer. The screen's glow bathed his face, gone ghastly pale, as he stared at the picture. His tongue worked around his mouth nervously, and bullets of sweat poured down his face.
"C-Captain?" Scare Bear asked again.
In a split second, the utter terror on Snerdly's face was replaced with steely determination. "Yogi, get to the rocketship and wait for me there. And whatever you do, do not leave without me. I'm contacting General Bullhorn right now to explain the situation, and to get a fleet. We'll need all the help we can get."
Yogi blanched. "But sir, don't you think a fleet's a bit-"
"This situation is serious, Yogi! I'm not going to let this enemy get away from me again!" Snerdly's tone was indignant. "And this time, you had better not screw up this mission or else the whole galaxy is at stake!"
Before Yogi or the other Goof-Ups had a chance to interject, Snerdly broke the connection, leaving them in the room by themselves.
"Well, then, let's get going!" Yogi ordered. "We don't have a moment to lose!"
With that, the group took off running for the landing platform.
Snerdly's fingers flew across the keys as he hurriedly typed out the message to his superior. His face was beaded with sweat, and his brow was narrowed in concentration. He really hoped that General Bullhorn was still there. If what Quack-Up had found really was true, and what he had seen wasn't a trick of the eye, he couldn't afford to not have the General's okay on this.
He hit the send button, and buried his face in his hands, horrible memories coming to mind. He had thought he was going to die when he saw that man on the deck...when he saw those massive warships overwhelming the Vitalization. That ancient human being who had the gall to send a distress signal to his enemy after attacking and boarding the very ship that had ended his reign of terror was responsible for the deaths of millions. He was responsible for the war that had split apart the galaxy.
He was responsible for robbing Snerdly of the people he loved.
The Galactic Federation had defeated him ten years ago, way before Yogi, Huck, Scare Bear and Quack-Up had joined. They had sealed him and his followers away in another dimension, destroying what remained of his cruel regime and freeing people from the horrific traps he'd designed. It had been a war that had cost the government money and many more their lives.
Against all odds, after so much sacrifice and suffering and barely escaping death by inches, he was back.
Heaven help them all, he was back...
"SNERDLY!" The enraged shout from his superior almost made the captain fly out of his chair. "What is going on that requires you needing a fleet?!"
Snerdly faced his superior, who was redder than a strawberry and looked ready to beat him to a pulp. They didn't call him "Bullhorn" for nothing. Snerdly cleared his throat, and decided to explain the situation in as few words as possible.
"S-Sir...he has returned," Snerdly said.
Bullhorn's face went from outrage to utter confusion. Then, dawning comprehension and shock crossed his face. "No...you can't be serious! We sealed him and his empire away years ago!" he said.
"It seems he's found a way to escape. If we don't stop him now, there's a good chance more people will die at his hands," Snerdly replied, his hands balled into fists.
General Bullhorn sighed. "Well, I can't exactly hand over the number of ships needed for a fleet. I'll send you a section of our navy, with the best L-class war cruisers available," he said. "I may consider lending you the Liberator II for this case."
Snerdly gaped. "Are you serious?!"
"If the Phantom Empire really has returned as you have discovered," Bullhorn answered, "then you'll need best weapons you can get your hands on. Don't destroy this ship like last time, alright?"
"Sir yes sir!" Snerdly answered, and signed off of the communication. He jumped out of his chair and went to find Yogi and the rest of the Galaxy Goof-Ups, determination driving his actions.
It was time to put this menace down for good.
Galactic Federation Space Cruiser Buccaneer
Control Bridge
"What's taking the captain so long?" Quack-Up asked, twirling around in the pilot's seat. "I want to get going so we can see what happened to the Vitalization!"
"He asked us to wait for him, remember?" Huck replied. He and Yogi were busy playing a game of Go Fish. "You got any threes?"
"Nope. Go fish," Yogi answered.
Scare Bear, who was seated on the left side of the ship, looked out the window and saw Snerdly coming towards the ship. "Hey! Here comes the captain now!" he said.
"Oh boy, now we can start the mission for real!" Quack-Up said, jumping out of his chair. In his excitement, his hand hit the ignition on the control pad, and the ship started to liftoff. Everyone onboard glared at Quack-Up, who gave them a sheepish look.
"Whoops," he said.
"QUACK-UP!" Snerdly's scream was somehow audible over the roar of the engines blaring to life. "I TOLD YOU NOT TO TAKE OFF WITHOUT ME!"
"Oh, yes sir, right away, sir!" Quack Up leaped to the controls, and jerked the steering wheel to the left. "Preparing to land now, sir!"
The rocketship teetered to the left, and rapidly started to spin out of control, heading directly for the base. Everyone except Quack-Up reacted accordingly.
"More like p-p-preparing to CRASH!" Scare Bear screamed, holding onto Yogi in fear.
"I can't see a thing if you're covering my face, Scare Bear!" Yogi yelled.
Huck put a hand to his head, his face going green. "I'm feelin' dizzy..." he groaned.
Outside on the landing platform, Snerdly watched as the rocket careened towards mission control. His eyes widened in horror. "NO! DON'T LAND ON THE BASE, YOU IDI-"
CRASH!
A massive explosion rocked the area then, sending chunks of the building flying in all directions and smoke billowing into the air. He ran over to the damaged rocket ship, his face redder than a beet with anger. The side door to the ship opened, revealing Huck, Yogi, Scare-Bear and a disheveled Quack-Up. Huck leaped down and landed on his face, but he didn't seem to mind. He began kissing the ground, relief flooding his bones.
"Oh, thank heavens we're back on the ground!" he cried. Everyone else got down on the ground as well in order to address the Captain properly.
"Uh, sorry, sir," Quack-Up apologized, a lopsided grin on his face. "The landing was less than perfect, sir!"
"Less than PERFECT?!" Snerdly yelled, but that was when an even louder and angrier shout came from inside the base.
"SNERDLY!" The unmistakable voice of General Bullhorn bellowed from the base's speakers. The general appeared on the holoscreen, his face redder than when Snerdly had seen him last. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"
The anger that Snerdly had been about unleash on the Goof-Ups disappeared in a matter of milliseconds. "S-Sir, I can explain-"
"There's nothing to explain! You're goofing up on the job, aren't you?!" Bullhorn interrupted. "The next time I see you, Snerdly, you're going to regret being placed in my regiment!"
"He already does," Huck added, completely ignoring Snerdly's severe glare.
"Oh, so you do, eh?!" Bullhorn went even redder, if that was even possible.
"Yeah, he kind of grumbles it under his breath when he thinks we're not listening," Huck continued, not noticing Snerdly gesturing at him to shut up.
"Is this true, Snerdly?" Bullhorn demanded.
Snerdly paused in giving Huck a death glare and turned towards his superior, bullets of sweat running down his face. "Sir, you don't understand, I-I enjoy working in this regiment, it's just...well..."
"IT'S JUST WHAT?!"
"I-I-It's just that I-I can never seem to get my job done thanks to these idiots I'm in charge of!" Snerdly said, pointing at the Goof-Ups.
"HA! Idiots? These brave men get their jobs done, unlike you, Snerdly!" Bullhorn said. "I want all of you to take on the enemy. I'm counting on you all to do your best. This is a mission we absolutely cannot fail. There will be disastrous consequences if you do. Have I made myself clear?"
"Yes, sir, we understand, sir!" Quack Up said, saluting.
Snerdly sighed, spent from having that argument with his boss. "Yes, sir," he groaned. He was relieved when the transmission went off. Now, it was time for him to regain his composure, lead this mission and get things back in order.
After a moment of silence, Scare Bear asked, "So...what do we do now?"
Whatever composure Snerdly had gained was lost in an instant. "FIX THE SHIP!" he yelled.
"YES SIR!" everyone yelled, and ran towards the rocket to get to work. Snerdly facepalmed, groaning in annoyance.
"Why is it always me?" he muttered.
Galactic Federation D-class Warship Vitalization
Donkirk stood at the bridge of the Vitalization, his milky white eyes filled with approval as he watched his soldiers at the upper and lower decks running the ship. The D-class Warship was larger than the first time he'd seen it, back when it was known as the Challenger to his army. It had been a small, insignificant ship, with only a third of the weapons his warship, the Devastation, carried, and didn't have nearly as many fighters. However, it had managed to overwhelm his task forces with brilliant strategies, and when Donkirk had faced off against it for the final time, it had come with a massive weapon that was used to transport items into dimensional space, called the D-Drive. The little ship had managed to overpower him and send him and his army into dimensional space for over ten years.
Well, now here he was, in control of the ship that had defeated him ten years ago. A cruel smile graced his lips. The Vitalization would make an excellent addition to his trophy collection.
The doors hissed open and a playful giggle reached his ears. "Hey, Boss," he said. "How's life for you?"
Donkirk turned to greet his subordinate. Standing on the deck was a man who was younger than him by about twenty years, but the way he carried himself made him look much younger than he really was. His hair was a charcoal grey, and slicked back with hair grease. He wore a black leather jacket over a dark blue shirt, with leather pants and boots that had spikes on the sides that looked like icicles. His dark blue eyes were alight with mania.
"Rokusaburo," Donkirk started, "have you been messing with the prisoners again?" He had to keep tabs on Rokusaburo often. The man was practically a child in an old man's body. A murderous, psychotic, pitiless child, that is, who loved to toy with his prisoners.
"Oh, not really~!" Rokusaburo's tone was playful, but also full of psychotic glee. "I may have just threatened the captain of the ship to put him in his place. He said he'd claw me to pieces if I laid so much as a finger on a member of his precious gang. The way he acts around them, you'd swear he was their dad."
"I had a feeling none of them would die. I guess that saying about cats is true," Donkirk muttered. "You were right to put him in his place. He and his gang are now under my terms, and they will do good to remember that." His eyes slowly scanned for the other member of his group. "Where is Yutaka?"
"Right here." The droll reply came from behind Rokusaburo. A taller, middle aged man stepped into view. His beard and hair were the color of salt and pepper, and his clothes weren't as biker punk as Rokusaburo's. He wore an emerald green jacket over a black shirt and jeans, and a chain of jagged green lightning bolts dangled from his belt. His green eyes showed obvious distaste as he looked at his companion. "I think that's the last time I let you near a prisoner's cell again, Roku."
Rokusaburo pouted. "Aw, you're no fun~"
"If you are done pouting," Donkirk said stiffly, "I believe we have business to attend to. Remember the task force that the Galactic Federation promised to send?"
"Yes," Yutaka answered. "I've heard that General Bullhorn is sending the son of the High Admiral of the Liberator to handle the problem. And it is actually a section, not a task force."
"Go, Yutaka-san!" Rokusaburo cheered. Yutaka merely rolled his eyes.
"Ah, yes. I remember High Admiral Kirk Snerdly," Donkirk said. "He was the one who managed to defeat me in battle once, during the middle of the war. I quite admired him, actually. It was a shame you had to kill him, Rokusaburo."
"Hey, he didn't accept my offer, so he had to go!" Rokusaburo shrugged.
Yutaka rolled his eyes once more. "Honestly, murder is nothing more than a game to you, isn't it?" he asked.
Rokusaburo's grin was deranged. "It's a game I'm quite good at, if I do say so myself," he said.
"When did they say the force was coming?" Donkirk asked.
"They should be here in less than an hour, sir," Yutaka explained.
"Excellent." Donkirk's mouth curled into a deranged smile of his own. "We shall be waiting for them."
Galactic Federation Space Patrol Cruiser Buccaneer
"Thankfully, Quack-Up's not behind the wheel, so we should be arriving at the appropiate destination very soon, sir," Snerdly said, talking to Bullhorn on the ship's holoscreen. The Galaxy Goof-Ups had gotten their ship fixed (after an hour of trial and error, that is), and they were now heading for the large blockade where the Vitalization was currently.
General Bullhorn looked much calmer than earlier, which was good for Yogi and the others. "The moment you and the rest of the section get there, I want you all to follow the plan. The lives of military personnel are at stake here. Do any of you remember the plan?"
Huck nodded. "We're supposed to break up most of the Phantom Empire's fleet with the starfighters and the warships we have, and then the four of us are to infiltrate the Vitalization and rescue Top Cat and his gang if they're still alive. Oh, and if necessary, destroy the Vitalization if this Donkirk feller refuses to surrender," he said.
Snerdly sighed. Well, at least one member of the team wasn't a complete idiot. "Excellent, Officer Huck. I figured you would, at least, remember the plan," he said.
"Thank you kindly, sir," Huck drawled.
"Good luck, everyone. Secure this victory for the Federation!" And then the screen went off.
Snerdly let out a long tired sigh as he continued to pilot the ship. His muscles were tense with anticipation and dread.
"Hey, uh, is something up, Captain Snerdly, sir?" Yogi asked.
"I'm just worried about what'll happen out there. Now that I know Donkirk's leading the attack..."
"Don't worry,sir!" Quack-Up called. "We'll have the old man in custody in no time!"
"'sides, all we got to do is stick to the plan," Huck said.
"That's what I'm worried about," Snerdly replied.
"You never worry, sir," Scare Bear said. "I'd like to not worry for once..."
"All I care about is getting rid of that menace and getting back to my normal life," Snerdly said, his grip tightening on the steering wheel. "I can't wait to get my revenge on that son of a-" He paused, remembering that Huck was in the group. "Son of a female dog."
"Hey, you sound like you've got a personal grudge or something against this Donkirk feller," Huck said.
"It is indeed...personal," Snerdly answered, his tone low.
"What? Did these guys kill your parents or something?" Yogi joked.
The whole deck went silent as Snerdly turned and looked at Yogi. The smirk on Yogi's face disappeared in an instant, and Huck turned to glare at him.
"That wasn't funny at all, Yogi," he chastised.
"Oh...oh my goodness," Scare Bear whispered, shaking in his chair. "Is that what really-"
"My father, actually," Snerdly said. He turned back to face the front. "It was during the middle of the war, when the Federation was just a rebellion movement fighting against the Empire. It was way before you joined, but I was there to witness it, since I was a teenager when the war started. I used to live with my dad on the Liberator, where he was the High Admiral. He was a great military strategist, and was the only man to actually defeat Donkirk once during that period, something unheard of back then. Back then, everyone either lost their ships to Donkirk or lost their lives. And then one day...the Liberator was attacked by Donkirk's fleet."
"The Battle of Sector Y. I remember learnin' about that in cadet school. I heard it got really ugly back then," Huck replied, wincing. "They tore that ship apart and killed the crewmembers. So...your dad was-"
"Killed on his own ship. Donkirk's psychotic subordinate, a guy named Roku or something, broke through the blockade and boarded the ship. My dad was not going to let Donkirk or one of his cronies take the ship as another war trophy. He ordered everyone off of the ship, including me, and told us to head to the Redemption, another warship that was in the fleet at the time. He decided to crash the ship into one of the Empire's warships in order to kill Roku with him. But Roku got to him first." Snerdly's left hand was trembling with rage. "I should know. I listened to him die."
"Oh...oh, gee, that's...t-that's awful," Yogi managed, feeling horrible about having made a joke about that earlier.
"And that's not even the worst part. The old jackal steered the ship around and rammed into one of our ships, the Sojourner. Many lives were lost that day," Snerdly said, "and I lost many people that I loved, too."
Scare Bear was horrified, Huck had tears running down his muzzle and Yogi blanched. "Oh, no..." he gasped.
"I became a member of the Galactic Federation when it finally became a government," Snerdly replied. "My mother urged me to go to the Space Corps, because back then it was safer. After my father died, she didn't want me to be caught up in another war. But I told her there was no way I was going to join the Space Corps. In the Space Corps, you don't get to work on high-profile cases like this. I wanted to be able to work on those, because then I have the ability to protect people, to save as many lives as possible. But mostly, I joined because I wanted to stop people like Donkirk from ever, ever rising to power again."
He glanced over at the rest of the team, who were all staring into the distance with blank expressions on their faces. They hadn't expected their own captain to have gone through so much pain and horror.
"So," Yogi said quietly, "that's why you were so horrified earlier."
Snerdly nodded. "I had seen firsthand what Donkirk had done to the galaxy. He utterly defaced everything, put people under slavery, had anyone who wasn't human killed, tricked people into working for him, trapping people in dimensions to be tormented for goodness knows how long, turned people into weapons...If he rises to power now, everyone in the galaxy is doomed."
Yogi was floored. "He killed anybody who wasn't-"
"We've reached our destination, sir!" Quack-Up reported, cutting Yogi off. "There are five large XX-class dreadnoughts surrounding the Vitalization, and they have hundreds of fighters on patrol!"
Yogi turned towards Snerdly, but the serious look on the captain's face told him that the conversation was over. "Alright, gentlemen. Begin Attack Formation Echo 3!" he said.
Huck and the rest of the Goof-Ups raced to their stations in order to do the roll call. Yogi reluctantly did the same, heading over to the middle deck.
"Deflector shields raised!" Quack-Up started.
"Warships in position!" Yogi said.
"Uh, cannons ready!" Scare Bear called.
"Shuttle prepared!" Huck said.
"All warships are in position, sir!" Quack-Up said.
Snerdly made his way over to the control bridge on the upper deck of the ship, his gaze hard and fire in his eyes. He glared at the warships in front of him and pointed at them dramatically.
"Begin attack!"
Vitalization
Prison Bay
"WHOA!" Rokusaburo stumbled backwards as the ship pitched and swayed with the volleys of cannon fire that slammed into it. The screams of missiles filled his ears as the Vitalization attacked back, as well as the other XX-class dreadnoughts. He grabbed hold of the prison bars, making sure that he didn't crash face first into the cell he was currently at. He knew his superior had given him direct orders to not go anywhere near the prisoners, but he just had too much fun messing with them.
So here he was, waiting to see if Top Cat really was going to claw his eyes right out of his skull like he said he would.
"Looks like you're going to be locked away for a while, oldie," Top Cat growled, his eyes locked onto Rokusaburo like a laser. "The second I get out of this prison, I'm going to make good on my promise."
"Oh, I do love a challenge," Rokusaburo said. "People like you are always the most fun to play with."
"People like you are the reason why I avoid old folks," Top Cat replied, his face twisted with disgust. "Now, if you really don't have anything to do, I'd suggest you go on your way, oldie, or else I really will claw your face off."
Rokusaburo's grin grew wider. "Oh, I'd like to see you try," he sneered, and then he turned and walked away. He could feel Top Cat glaring at his back, and he chuckled, just to make the cat angry.
The moment the door closed, Rokusaburo came face to face with Yutaka. "What did we tell you about messing with the prisoners, Roku?" he growled.
"I know, I know, but I couldn't help myself. I love riling them up to the point where they want to fight, because then I get to prove how empty their threats are," Rokusaburo said. He motioned to the door leading to the prison bay. "And I was having quite a lot of fun messing with Top Cat. He'll be the hardest nut to crack once the Boss gets a hold of him."
"Yes. Those are the people he has the most fun with," Yutaka replied. "But I didn't come down here to discuss the Boss' strategies. I came to get you away from them before they possibly do kill you. And the Boss wants us to be prepared. The Federation will possibly board the Vitalization in order to rescue the surviving crewmembers and capture us."
"If that is the case," Rokusaburo said, his grin all razors, "then we should probably dispose of the crewmembers before they get here."
"No. The Boss will let us know what to do if and when things get to that point," Yutaka replied. "Now come on. We have a battle to win here." He then turned and left.
Rokusaburo humphed as he followed Yutaka out of the prison bay. "Fine, fine."
END OF PART 1
Well, how was that? I hope I didn't scar anybody with all the darkness in this chapter. It's just kind of the way my mind works.
I kind of like Captain Snerdly in the show, and I feel bad for the face that he has to to put up with utter failures of patrolmen in the show. And I had to show that someone knew who the Phantom Empire was, so I came up with the idea that Snerdly was around during the war, which lasted for three years, and that he lost a lot of people he knew during that period. Part 2 will be about the space battle, Donkirk's plans and the Goof-Ups goofing up big time and having to pay for what they did. In other words, crap hits the fan in Part 2.
The original characters Donkirk, Rokusaburo and Yutaka are all from my Iron Chef fanfictions that I wrote when I was in 10th grade. And before you say, "You don't own any of the Iron Chefs!", Rokusaburo and Yutaka were actually clones of the Iron Chefs created by Donkirk that acted nothing like them. As in, psychotic killers. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but I still use these characters because I see a wealth of potential in them. Rokusaburo (who is named after Iron Chef Rokusaburo Michiba) was the only clone I created, and I didn't make Donkirk until later, but I had so much fun writing them in my old stories I couldn't resist bringing them back. If you'd like to know more about my crazy Iron Chef stories, I can send them to you on my Google Drive.
Reviews are appreciated, but constructive criticism is even better. I want to really grow as a writer, so tell me what you think of the story and don't hesitate to tell me what needs to be done to improve it.
God Bless,
Iheartgod175
