Author's Note: Ok so, this idea came about in a very interesting way. So I was talking with CrazyTimesAMillion right? Well I call her Jaybird and she calls me Wingnut, and I always call her adorakable. An adorable dork. Then I thought to myself, hey? What would happen if Dick called Jason adorkable? And I became determined to write that. Well then when I was talking with PrincessNightstar24 about one of my Jaydick stories when she said what if Jason went up to Dick saying 'Swiggity, swooty, I'm coming for that booty'? So then I became determined to write that, and I combined the two together and made an actual one-shot idea. Sooo, now that you know how it came about, enjoy!
Warning: Language, some makin out, I use the word sex! *gasp*, and this is a slash! M/M. Don't like it? Don't read it.
Disclaimer: No, I do not own these characters, but I do own this awesome idea X3
Third POV
Dick Grayson and Jason Todd's relationship has always been, err, complicated.
Even before Jason had died, things between them were strange. For one, they had resented each other at first. Jason took over the Robin mantle without even Dick knowing. Of course that was Bruce's fault, but still. Dick was Jason's predecessor, the golden child who set the bar extremely high for him to follow after. Then of course they were kinda supposed to be brothers, but it never really was a brotherly bond that formed between them.
Yeah ok, Jason had had a huge crush on his older 'brother' when he donned the scaly green panties, but he continuously claimed it wasn't his fault. He'd always mutter something about Dick's stupid, gorgeous ass and embarrassedly shuffle away. So despite that, before Jason had died at the hands of the Joker, the two boys never really established what they felt. Then after the world shattering loss, life changing return, and a few mishaps of Jason being a tad bit bonkers, things were settling down just a smidgen.
It was two years, almost three, after Jason's return from the dead, and it just seemed things never stopped changing. Almost four and a half months ago another major change had occurred. It had happened during an odd team up due to circumstance between Nightwing and The Red Hood. After they managed to take out the gang and free some hostages in Blüdhaven, they ended up fighting, again, over Jason's new 'methods'.
For weeks there had been this awkwardness hanging between them, and it seemed every time they saw one another it just got worse. When their fighting on an abandoned building's rooftop ended up with Dick being pressed into a brick wall by Jason, things got, interesting. If you count interesting as suddenly they were passionately kissing without warning, then yeah it was interesting.
Ignoring the cuts and bruises they had given each other, the two pressed as closely together as they possibly could. Tongues dueled as both moaned, lost in the sensation. When they finally ran out of air and had to pull away, both realized exactly what had just happened. Jason was the first to recover as he stumbled backwards, both flushing and panting, eyes wide and confused. In a moment Jason had swung away, both needing time to think.
A week later they met again on patrol. Although they really shouldn't have considering they had different routes, but they couldn't bear to keep waiting any longer. So when Jason landed on the rooftop behind Dick, the acrobat was relieved, and also apprehensive. Of course Jason tried to cover the moment with bravado, but Dick saw right through that façade. This time it was Dick who pressed Jason into the wall in a split second, making Jason blink in surprise.
"You're so stupid" Dick breathed before kissing Jason deeply, not allowing him to make a retort. Although he did try, but just wound up with the older's tongue down his throat. Yeah, but he really didn't mind that at all. Not, one, bit.
So from that night on after they had stumbled into Dick's apartment kissing and touching everywhere they could, the two became something, more. Of course the first month they both denied it was anything besides the occasional hook up, Jason always leaving through the fire escape afterwards. Then in month two they finally got to confessing to each other their feelings and officially became a 'couple'. Of course it wasn't until month three, practically four, that they had bothered letting their family know, and the reactions weren't actually all that bad.
Alfred had of course already known, being Alfred, Tim supported them, saying they were good for each other, Damian at first was hesitant but by the end of their family dinner was as much on their side as the little demon could possibly get, and as for Bruce? Well, at first he was completely shocked. They had managed to surprise the almighty Batman. He had a minor freak out but after their dinner and Dick pointing out how much less killing Jason was doing since they had started their little thing granted them his acceptance.
Now in the fourth month of their relationship Jason had moved in with Dick, and the two were happy as could be. Yeah there had been a lot of obstacles to overcome and things to get used to, but they made it work. It had taken a long time before Jason had finally opened up to his boyfriend, and when he did the two grew even closer. Their obvious love had even spread into their alter ego's. Everyone knew Red Hood and Nightwing were an item. However, it in all actuality helped them considering the gangs knew if they hurt one of them, the other would hunt them down. It all worked out.
They still had their bad days like every other couple, but they were always there for one another. Completely and utterly in love.
Which is why one day Dick said something he knew only he could get away with. "You know what Jay?" the older man asked.
Currently the two were watching tv together on a lazy Sunday morning. It seemed so rare that they ever got moments like this, but they both loved them. Dick was laying on top of Jason's chest on their couch. A long time had passed before Jason had become ok with the cuddling and constant affection, but now he was starting to enjoy it as much as Dick. The two had been snuggling before the acrobat had lifted his face up to peer down at Jason, chin resting on his chest.
Jason had his arms wound around the other's waist as he turned to look up at his boyfriend from the TV with a raised eyebrow. "What?"
"You are completely adorable" Dick answered, grinning widely as Jason frowned.
With a shake of his head the younger retorted "I am not adorable, and you're a dork."
However this didn't sway Dick as he continued "Yeah, you are. You're always so sweet to me and it's just adorable. Yeah yeah I know, but so are you."
Rolling his eyes, Jason stated "The Red Hood is not adorable, I'm a badass motherfucker."
Dick laughed and placed a soft kiss to the larger's lips. "Yeah sure, on the outside, but on the inside you're a big ole softy."
"Mm, only for you" Jason murmured, dragging the other into a deeper kiss.
Briefly allowing the embrace, Dick broke it to reply with a grin "Aaw, see? You're being absolutely adorable right now, and I love it."
Sighing, Jason knew he was never going to win this argument with Dick. He slid his hands down to rest on the acrobat's perfect ass, and relished in the small sound of appreciation it earned him as he said "I try, and you're still a dork."
A simple, affectionate smile spread across Dick's lips as he kissed Jason. The younger happily returned the gesture as the kiss deepened, Dick's hands in his hair. Then suddenly the acrobat pulled back with a gasp. "What?" Jason asked, slightly annoyed as that delicious mouth left his own.
"Adorkable."
Jason's eyebrows knitted together in confusion as he questioned "Excuse me?"
Grinning, Dick repeated "Adorkable! It's what you are, an adorable dork!"
"That may be the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my whole entire life, and I've heard your puns" Jason stated, making Dick pout.
With a huff, Dick retorted "It's not ridiculous!"
Jason rose a brow commenting "It's about as ridiculous as that horrible Disco Nightwing costume you wore back when I donned the scaly green panties."
"Ok, let's get some things straight here" Dick began, counting off on his fingers as he went along, "First of all, I know for a fact you loved that suit when you were kid, so you can't make fun of it. Second, I looked damn gorgeous in that suit and you know it. Third, it takes talent to come up with puns like mine baby."
Smirking, Jason replied "Ok first I didn't love the suit, I loved the way you looked in it. Second, you look damn gorgeous in any suit. Third I can come up with way better puns than you can babe."
"You're so sweet, and no you can't. I'm the original pun maker, you can't beat the original" Dick answered with a mischievous smile.
With a roll of his eyes Jason remarked "I can beat you at puns, any time or place."
"Fine, care to make a little wager then?" the older asked.
"Depends."
Dick leaned back further explaining "A week, and whoever makes the most puns gets to do whatever they want to the other."
Humming in thought, Jason grinned as he replied "Sounds good to me, but I hope your ready to not be able to walk for a week after I win."
"Mm, I don't think so Jaybird. I'm going to win, and when I do I'm going to..." Dick began, whispering some very filthy words in his boyfriend's ear.
Breath hitching as Dick tongued his ear, Jason gulped and tried to get moisture back in his mouth that had run dry at his boyfriend's words. Clearing his throat to prevent squeaking, he said "Can I get a preview of that?" Dick leaned back and grinned down at Jason before pouncing with a "Gladly."
And so began the war.
Really it probably wasn't a good idea to start a bet of the most ridiculous puns with being who they were. You know, considering they were both super competitive. The puns began coming out in full force, and soon the 'pun' war turned more into a 'who can say the most ridiculous thing at the right moment' war. Like how when Dick and Jason were in the kitchen of their apartment cleaning, Dick thought of a pun.
"Hey Jay" he said, turning around with a loaf of bread in his arms and waggled his eyebrows, "I loaves you dozens!"
Jason took in what was said and smirked, he could so do this. "You're a weirdough" he replied, leaning back against the counter.
Copying Jason's movements, Dick leaned back against the opposite counter with a grin. "Oh come on, I'm on a roll."
"Not really, one more pun like that and you're toast" the younger stated, returning the grin.
With a fake sigh Dick snapped his fingers muttering "Jammit."
Jason stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Dick's waist saying "Dick, it's not really like you knead to win."
"Mm, I doughnut think you need to win either" Dick retorted with a smirk.
Chuckling, Jason said "I don't know, I think I'm breader than you are."
Dick shook his head and nudged Jason lightly, sighing "Alright, enough loafing around. Go finish cleaning."
"Ugh fine" Jason groaned turning to continue his work.
However after a few minutes he stated with a smirk "This cleaning is the crumbiest."
And that was only on the first day of their challenge.
Of course as the days went on the puns got worse and worse. They didn't even stop when they were out fighting crime, driving all of the villain's insane with their continuous flow of horrible puns. Even when they were at the manor or out in public, they never stopped. It earned them laughter and annoyed looks. Of course they were keeping score of who had the most puns in the beginning, but soon they lost count and they were really only doing it for fun. I mean, who doesn't want to say horrible jokes?
Yeah, that thought quickly got proven wrong.
Almost everything they said was a pun or something like it, and it was quickly becoming a little annoying. Why on earth had they agreed to this? Once they started, they just couldn't stop. I mean, they hadn't even had sex since the challenge started. That alone was a red flag considering you could consider them a very intimate couple. By the time they reached their final day of punning, they were pretty much on auto-pilot twenty-four/seven. I mean, Jason hadn't even bothered to wake up at a half decent time like he usually did on weekends so that they could spend time together. The only time they really actually saw each other was when they were both getting ready for bed after patrol, like now, having gone on separate routes.
Dick sighed as he stripped out of his Nightwing costume, and noted Jason didn't jump him like he normally would if neither were injured. In fact, the larger man didn't even spare a glance in his direction and that made Dick sigh again as he slipped on a pair of sweatpants. Why on Earth had he started this stupid contest? It was all because of that stupid freakin word. Now things were strained, and almost as if they weren't even dating at all. The thought made Dick sick to his stomach, but what could he do? He didn't feel like reading Jason's expression to try and figure out what he could do, so he just let out another sigh. Defeated.
The younger vigilante noted how much his boyfriend was sighing and let out a sigh of his own. Things were just not the same between them. It was so strange, one week you could barely keep them apart for longer than ten minutes, a week later and Jason couldn't even remember the last time that they'd kissed. Patrol had been very slow unfortunately, so all Jason could think about was Dick and their now strained relationship. Especially since they now always patrolled together.
As he shed his Red Hood uniform to slip on some shorts, Jason noticed out of the corner of his eye that his boyfriend was practically naked. Typically he'd jump at the opportunity, but instead he simply wanted to shrug at the bare skin. He didn't feel like... Wait a minute, wait just one fucking moment he didn't feel like looking or touching his amazingly sexy boyfriend?! What the hell was wrong with him?!
When Dick went to crawl into bed, he stopped short noticing that Jason was simply standing stock-still in the middle of getting dressed. Raising an eyebrow, he called "Jay? You ok there?"
However when Jason didn't respond, Dick began to worry. Walking over to his boyfriend, he placed a hand on Jason's shoulder asking "Jason, what's wrong? Did you get hurt?"
Jason looked over at Dick's worried face and wasn't quite sure how to begin what he wanted to say. Words had never been his strong point. "Our contest is over" he blurted out, and wanted to face palm himself immediately afterwards. That's not exactly what he wanted to say.
Sighing, Dick drew back now knowing that Jason wasn't hurt and went to go lay in bed. "Yep, it is."
"Who won?" Jason asked, coming to lay down beside Dick as he looked at his boyfriend.
Another soft, sad sigh escaped Dick as he rolled over stating "There isn't one." And Jason knew it was more than just the contest they were talking about.
They laid in silence for awhile, both of them thinking about how they could fix the situation. Jason knew he'd have to make the first attempt, and he began to set his plan into action. Scooting closer to Dick, he wound his arms around the smaller's waist and pressed a kiss to his exposed shoulder. Dick tensed at the contact, but Jason was undeterred in his resolve to fix the situation.
Continuing to kiss along the curve of his shoulder upwards towards his neck, Jason stopped his butterfly kisses when he reached Dick's ear and breathed "I love you, Richard."
Dick's breathing had hitched as Jason began trailing kisses up his neck, eyes falling closed as he enjoyed the sensation he hadn't felt in so long. A gasp escaped his lips when those words were whispered in his ear and Jason gently nibbled on his ear lobe. Turning around in his boyfriend's arms, Dick looked into Jason's blue-green eyes saying gently "I love you too, Little Wing."
At those words, Jason immediately dragged Dick into a kiss. The older's hands curled on Jason's chest, both groaning as they opened their mouths. God, it's been so long, too long. A burning heat filled them as slowly and sensually they shared deep kiss after deep kiss. Only breaking apart to take a quick breath before kissing again. Both were panting as Jason maneuvered Dick onto his back so he could hover over him. The kisses were so amazingly filled with fireworks Jason was swearing in between each one which made Dick chuckle, his toes already curled from the searing embrace as his hands clutched at Jason's hair.
Finally when the need for oxygen became too much to bear, and their quick breaths stopped helping, they pulled apart with a gasp. Both of their lips were red and swollen, but neither could care as they looked at one another. Breathing heavily, Jason panted "Shit Dickie... I, missed your, kisses."
"You, too, J-Jay" Dick replied as he eyed his love's lips, wanting more.
However Jason cupped Dick's face with a hand saying "Let's agree to never have a pun war again because I think if I go this long without kissing you again I might die."
A soft chuckle escaped his lips as Dick replied "I totally agree, and I'm sorry for, whatever it is I was doing."
"I'm sorry too" Jason chuckled, before pressing a quick kiss to the other's lips, "and you know you were wrong."
Dick's eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he asked between quick pecks "What, do, you, mean?"
Moving down to bite and lick at the other's neck, Jason answered "There is a winner." He pulled back and chuckled at the other's inquisitive look, explaining "We both won because swiggity swooty, I am coming for dat booty."
Immediately Dick burst into a fit of laughter, clutching at his stomach as Jason smiled. "What, even was, that?" the acrobat asked as he tried to calm down, wiping a tear of mirth from his eye.
"A rhyme I made up because you have a fine ass, and also because I wanted to make you laugh."
With a smile Dick dragged Jason down into a kiss muttering "I love you."
Jason couldn't help but smile and reply against his lips "Love you too."
After all, it was true.
Then the kiss intensified as Dick dragged Jason closer, somehow making their deep kiss grow even deeper. Both moaned as their tongues tangled, slowly at first as the kiss became hotter. Soon they were both panting again as they were kissing with a bruising force. They couldn't get enough of the other. A lack of air forced them to pull apart once more. However Jason just continued to kiss his way down to Dick's chest stating "You're calling in sick to work tomorrow, I'm going to need more than a night."
Chuckling, Dick's laughter shifted into a whimper as Jason's tongue found one of his nipples. "O-Ok, ok, oh Jay."
"God Dickie" Jason groaned, the noises the older man was beginning to make driving him insane, "I am going to devour you."
"Mm, please do" Dick breathed, making Jason smirk as he leant down to initiate another deep kiss. Then Jason set to work on fulfilling his words, both in complete ecstasy after not doing anything for a week. After a few hours, they were curled up together, exhausted. Both sticky with sweat and not yet completely sated, but good for now.
Dick nuzzled up under the younger's chin, practically purring. Arms wrapped securely around the man laying on his chest, Jason gave a sigh of contentment as he subconsciously pulled Dick closer. Neither said a word as they cuddled, content. Just when Jason was about to slip into unconsciousness, Dick finally decided to speak.
"Ya know, you're still adorkable."
"Richard John Grayson shut the fuck up or I swear to god I will murder you."
Yes, yes I just wrote that and I have no regrets! I loved writing this and I'll admit, I googled most of these puns. Thinking of puns is hard honestly. Haha, so hopefully you liked this! Again, thanks to PrincessNightstar24 for lending me her catch phrase and to CrazyTimesAMillion for inspiring this! It was supposed to be hilarious, but it turned more into a hurt/comfort... Oh well! And do you know how hard it is to make a long, T, a Jaydick?! Very hard. Anyways if you did like this don't forget to fave/follow/review or all 3! Maybe I'll do a sequel if people like this.
If you love Jaydick like I do, go check out my other Jaydick stories! I have a multi-chapter in the cartoon teen titans section. It takes place during Jay's lost days and is basically what would happen if Jay was Red X. Also CrazyTimesAMillion has a lot of different things and PrincessNightstar24 has a bunch of cute robstar! Please and thank you! ;)
