Disclaimer: I'm not J.K.R. Unless my parents have been keeping something from me.
(A/N: I once watched "Window of Opportunity" (the "Groundhog Day" episode of Stargate SG-1) six times in one day. This was the result.)
Chapter 1: Spare Time
In a third floor lavatory at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, four boys were holding a conference.
"This is bad, even for you, Prongs," said one in a conspiratorial whisper.
"Oh, come on! Name one bad idea I've ever had!" another said, clearly offended.
"Just last term you had us breaking into the girls' dormitory to steal their knickers," muttered a third, sounding as though he was trying not to laugh.
"Well, how was I to know they had that stupid sliding staircase?"
"We had detention for a month," said the fourth morosely.
"Are you blushing, Wormtail? We didn't even get to the dormitory!"
"Not exactly a surprise, is it? He's probably never seen a girl's knickers in his life."
"That's not the p-point!"
"Shut up, all of you! Listen, I've got—"
The door opened suddenly and all four snapped to attention, one cracking his head smartly on the washbasin.
"What are you lot up to? Making trouble again, I expect?"
James Potter made a show of dragging himself to his feet, stretching and yawning.
"Nothing, nothing at all. Perfectly innocent, of course. Well, must be going." He pushed past…whoever it was, some prefect whose name he couldn't be bothered to remember, and the other three followed in short order.
"You're mental, Prongs," Sirius Black said earnestly. "You don't even know who that was, do you?"
"Why? Was it someone important?"
"It was only the Head Boy, you git!" said Remus Lupin, looking at him with exasperation.
"He isn't! I remember him. He's just a prefect."
"That was last year, mate."
"Was it? Ah, well. He'll get over it."
"Before or after he puts us in detention for the rest of our lives?"
"Well, if that's your attitude, you can stay behind, Moony." He cocked an eyebrow at the remaining two. "Anyone else? Padfoot?"
"I'm in. You've got the best bad ideas of anyone I know."
"Wormtail?"
Peter Pettigrew looked reluctant. "Oh, well, I—I suppose…"
"Right, then. Moony, go do your homework or something. The rest of us will be off having fun."
"You're only going to get into trouble, you know," he said to their retreating backs. James waved back at him over his shoulder.
"'Bye, Moony!"
"Dammit," he muttered, sighing heavily as he caught up with them.
OoOoOo
"Has he asked you out again?"
"Of course he has. He's done it every day since fourth year." The voice caught James's attention and his stomach lurched unpleasantly. It was Lily Evans, and she was talking about him.
"Er…you two go on. Padfoot, c'mere.
Sirius gave him a questioning look. "What—oh, not again! She's been shooting you down for two years, mate. I think it's safe to say she's not interested. And she's got Annabella Trifid with her; you know how much she fancies me—"
"They all fancy you," James snapped. "Look, all I need you to do is keep her busy while I talk to Evans."
"Chat her up, more like," muttered Sirius bitterly.
They walked slightly behind the two girls, catching one last snippet of conversation before they interrupted.
"You talk about him a lot, you know. You even do it in your sleep."
"Do I? Well, I expect even my subconscious hates him."
"Not exactly—"
"Morning, Evans," James said brightly, falling into step beside her and throwing an arm around her shoulders.
"You again. What do you want now?"
"Merely the pleasure of your company. Up for another round of I-ask-you-out- and-you-say-no? What are you doing on Saturday?"
"I'll be burying your body if you don't piss off."
"Oh, why do you hurt him when he loves you so?" said Sirius. Lily's friend caught sight of him and immediately began fussing with her hair.
"All right, Anna?" he asked her without enthusiasm, and then to James, more quietly: "You owe me."
James gave him a wolfish grin before to turning to Lily once again. "That a yes, then, Evans?"
Lily didn't even look at him. "I suggest you take that hand off me unless you fancy losing it, Potter."
"Why? Have you got somewhere else you'd like me to put it?" James said, or rather started to say, the end of the sentence having been cut off by the appearance of Remus and Peter.
"Got tired of waiting," Remus said shortly. He nodded a vague greeting to the two girls, then glared at James. "Let's just get on with it, all right?"
Lily eyed the four of them suspiciously. "Get on with what?"
"Can't say, I'm afraid," James said, putting as much distance between them as he could without actually running.
"Top secret," Sirius added in confidential tones as he followed James. "Security risk, you understand."
"You idiot!" Remus exploded the second they were out of earshot. "Are you trying to get us caught?"
"But we haven't even done anything yet," Peter said in a small voice. Remus ignored him.
"And the only reason I'm going along with whatever ridiculous thing you've got planned is because—"
"Because you haven't got anything better to do?" Sirius asked innocently.
"Because I don't even want to think about what'll happen if I don't," he finished.
"And here I thought you liked my ridiculous plans," James said in a sad and wholly unconvincing tone.
"Besides, what else have we got to do until full moon?" said Sirius.
"Say it a bit louder, Padfoot," Remus muttered. "Parts of Romania might not have heard you."
"I said, WHAT ELSE HAVE WE—"
"Oh, shut up," Remus said, but even he couldn't help laughing. "All right, what're you really up to?"
"It's going to be something brilliant," said Peter.
"The suspense is killing me," Sirius said, already sounding bored.
"Just tell us, will you?" Remus snapped.
"We," James said with a seemingly eternal pause for effect, "are going to steal a Time-Turner."
OoOoOo
"You're mental," Remus whispered. "Absolutely mad, all three of you."
"Oh, shut it, Moony," James said in an equally quiet voice. "If you think it's such a crap idea, find something else to do."
"You do know this is illegal, don't you? If we're caught anywhere near—"
"Illegal, eh?" Sirius said in a bemused sort of way. "Reminds me of a few other slight violations we've committed. Certain monthly violations, perhaps?"
"That's different—"
"You know full well it isn't," James hissed. "And if you lot don't shut up arguing, we really are going to get caught."
"It's all very well for you and that bloody cloak of yours," Remus said sourly.
James had a tendency to ignore people when he was losing an argument and kept his mouth shut as the four of them trudged solemnly down the hallway, though as far as anyone else could see, there were only three. It had nothing to do with the angle or lighting; it was the fact that James was well hidden in the folds of his invisibility cloak.
"And honestly," Remus went on, refusing to drop the subject, "what good will it do us when you're the only one who's invisible? How do you think the rest of us look milling about in the corridors talking to ourselves?"
"Will you please shut up?" James said. It was very difficult to look irritated while invisible, so he settled for sounding annoyed. "McGonagall will kill us twice over if she catches us lurking in front of her office."
"Then how exactly do you plan on sneaking in there to nick the stupid thing in first place?"
"I'm invisible, Moony. How do you think I'm planning on doing it? Look, she's still dealing with our little diversion—"
"Did you really have to stop up all the toilets?"
"Yes. Anyway, that'll give us half an hour at least. All you three have got to do is keep watch while I get it, all right?"
"And just what are we supposed to do if someone sees us?" asked Remus, rapidly running out of patience with the whole situation.
"Looks like we're about to find out," Sirius said.
Scuffling down the hallway with his alarmingly shaped nose roughly a centimeter from the pages of the book he was reading was—
"Snivellus," Sirius said sweetly, a horribly malicious grin spreading over his face. "How are we doing this fine evening? Greasing up the reading materials, I see."
Severus Snape frowned intensely, his hand shifting towards the pocket that held his wand. "You—"
"Expelliarmus!" Sirius said instantly.
"Just leave it," Remus said, knowing it would probably not affect the situation in the slightest. "We've got better things to do."
"Oh, I've always got time for old Snivellus. What do you reckon, Moony? A nice Bat-Bogey hex for our dear little friend? Perhaps we'll petrify him and leave him in the girl's loo..."
A sharp, invisible kick struck Sirius's shin, and a low, invisible voice said, "We'll get him later, Padfoot."
Sirius gave a disappointed sigh, but relented. "It's your lucky day, Snivelly. Go disgust someone else for a while." He muttered an inaudible spell under his breath and sent Snape's wand skittering down the corridor, snickering minutely as Snape chased after it.
"Miserable git," James said cheerily. "Wish me luck, boys."
OoOoOo
Gaining uninvited access to Minerva McGonagall's office was no easy task, and it took James the best part of ten minutes just to get the door open.
"Hurry up," Remus said, attempting to shield the seemingly independent movement of the locked door from anyone who might be approaching. "It's already been twenty minutes—"
"I would if this stupid bloody door would just—" The lock clicked and James exhaled triumphantly, "—open."
He crossed the floor as though afraid it might drop out from under him, but his target didn't seem to be anywhere within eyesight.
"Probably in the desk, then..."
A few quiet words under his breath and the drawers flew open, the lowest on the left revealing a glinting miniature hourglass.
"Excellent," James said.
"Prongs!"
James whirled around. "Didn't I tell you lot to stay—?"
"There's nothing to keep watch for! McGonagall's on her way back!"
"She's what?"
Sirius shot into the room behind Remus. "Someone must have told her, bet you anything it was Snivellus—"
"It doesn't matter! We've got to get out of here before she sees us!"
"We're dead, she'll kill us—"
"Shut up, Wormtail. I'm trying to think," James snapped. "How long have we got?"
"Er..." Sirius peered around the corner and immediately drew back. "About four seconds."
"Right," James said hurriedly. "Right. No problem. I'll just—Accio!"—the Time-Turner flew into his outstretched palm— "We can just—"
"No we can't!" Remus said. "You've got no idea what sort of thing might—"
"It can't be worse than what McGonagall will do to us! This is illegal, you said it yourself. Now do you want to be expelled or do you want to help me work this stupid thing?"
Remus paused, looking horribly unsure. "It's got to go round all four of us," he said with a great sense of urgency, "or someone will get left behind."
"Look, you've got to stand closer, the chain isn't—"
"Get off, Wormtail, that's my foot you're standing on—"
"No, you're doing it wrong—"
"Quit shoving—"
"Be careful, it's—"
Clink.
"—fragile."
For a moment they stood silently, assessing the damage done by the fall.
"You've broken it—"
"Doesn't matter, just pick it up—"
"Got it!"
"On three, then. One—"
"D'you think it'll hurt?"
"Shut up, Wormtail—two—"
"I've got a bad feeling about this..."
"Don't make me hex you, Moony."
"I'm telling you, something's bound to go—"
The four of them were propelled abruptly backwards through a tunnel of shapes and colors that refused to focus into more than aesthetic migraine.
"—wrong," Remus tried to say, but the words seemed to stretch out from his vocal cords with out making any sound at all.
"Was it supposed to do that?" Sirius asked loudly, struggling to be heard over the sound of Peter being violently sick.
"Er..." Remus checked over his surroundings, his typical worried expression intensifying.
"'Course it was," said James firmly.
Remus was still scanning the room with a look of increasing dismay. "I don't think so," he said slowly. "What're we doing in the dormitory?"
"If McGonagall isn't shouting the school down, it's done what it's supposed to."
"But we've still got pajamas on, this isn't what—"
"How many times have I got to tell you?" James said, his voice now edged with slight irritation. "There's nothing to worry about."
"Of course there—DON'T OPEN THAT DOOR!"
Peter pulled away from the door as if it had burned him. "What? What's—I didn't—"
"Just how thick is it possible for one human being to be?" James said rhetorically.
Peter looked even more confused than usual. "I was only—breakfast is nearly over, we'll be late for Charms…"
"Oh no we won't," Sirius said, his tone declaring that this was perfectly obvious. "We're already there."
"Ah. What?"
"We've gone back in time," Remus explained gently.
"I know that."
"So," he went on, clearly the only one with any patience left, "there'll be another set of us somewhere out there, won't there?"
"Er…yes?"
"And how do you suppose you'd react if you ran into another Peter Pettigrew?" James asked impatiently. "We can't be seen, not by anybody."
"No problem," said Sirius. "We'll use the map to keep track of our…other…selves, and have loads of free time besides. Moony, you had it last."
Remus was already digging through his book bag, eventually thrusting a faded sheet of parchment at Sirius.
"Right. Let's see…here we are in the dormitory…and…er…Prongs?"
"What?" asked James, who hadn't been paying attention at all.
"Have a look at this."
James stared intently at the map, frowning more severely the longer he looked at it.
"Ah. That could be a problem."
"What could be a—oh. Oh, dammit…"
"Well," Peter said hesitantly, "Maybe it's—"
"It isn't. It's never been wrong before, and it isn't now."
"How could it—?"
But Remus was unable to find an appropriate end to his sentence, and as they looked down at what was most definitely one set of marauders, it was evident that something strange had happened.
