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BLOCK ESTATE

1:37 P.M.

THE KITCHEN

"But mom! That is so unfair! LBRs! At my house?!" Massie Block let her mouth gape for a few moments until she realized that her Chilled Ice Glossip Girl lip gloss was drying out. She quickly pressed her lips back together, holding back the rage that threatened to burst out of her at any second.

Kendra Block pursed her lips and pulled the low-fat mayo out of the clean, steel fridge. "You mean our house," she corrected.

Massie huffed indignantly, "Whatevs." She traced random scribbles with her finger against the marble countertop.

Kendra placed the mayo on the counter and dug a knife inside. She slapped the mayonnaise on a piece of white bread and Massie rolled her eyes up to the ceiling. She moaned to express that she was especially disappointed in her mother's decision to invite nearly her entire grade to her end-of-the-year pool party.

"What on earth are LDRs?" Kendra inquired, accidentally spilling a drop of mayonnaise on her cream-colored, short sleeved Georgia Armani button down.

"LBRs mom! B, B, B! Losers Beyond Repair. Duh." Massie leaned forward on the marble counter, holding back an eye-roll.

"I see," Kendra seemed amused as she dabbed at the stain with a napkin.

"Mom, that is so not funny. It's a catastrophe!" Massie grabbed a handful of her gleaming brown hair in her frustration.

"I'm sorry Massie, but that's how it is. I don't want anyone left out." Hello, isn't leaving people out the point?

Massie sniffed, annoyed. In her mind she was racking through an automatic list of excuses to use against her mother. None of her excuses would fit the occasion like a pair of True Religions fit Massie though. It just wouldn't do.

Massie stood up from her stool in a huff. She stared at her mother, giving Kendra her best glare. She would gladly have liked to cancel the party if LBRs would be walking all over her property but HELLO! She had to give people something to talk about.

Kendra shrugged and placed some lettuce on her sandwich.

"That's full of calories!" Massie snapped. She really couldn't find anything else to say. She stormed upstairs in her nude two inch Michael Kors heels, twisting them hard into the hardwood floor just the way Kendra liked it. Not.

BLOCK ESTATE

6:45 P.M.

MASSIE'S BACKYARD

Massie was sure everyone was out to get her this week. Nearly everyone had retreated to the backyard where the latest hits were pulsing from the stereo speakers. Massie was about to join her friends in the pool, when a familiar drawl sounded from behind her over Katy Perry's Hot 'n Cold.

"Hey, Block!"

Massie glared at the glossy polished floor before putting on the biggest fake smile she could and turned around.

"Well, well, well. Finally out from the trailers, eh Derrick?"

Derrington smirked. "Not bad, Block. But it's gonna take more than that to stop me," he wiggled his butt.

To show profession, Massie simply rolled her eyes. "Puh-leeze. What's it gonna take then, Derrick?" she leaned in seductively.

"I never got that apology."

"Your point?" Massie studied her cotton candy pink cuticles.

Derrington gave her a little grin.

Massie found that a little uncomfortable, because that was a grin that showed absolute respect, admiration and… well, like. Massie simply rolled her eyes once more and hurried away to the backyard.

"Hey, Block!" Derrington called from behind her.

But she forced herself to keep walking, no matter how much her legs wanted to go the opposite direction toward the cutie wearing those amazingly hot board shorts.

After that little adventure, the party began to progress. LBRs seemed to understand that they weren't really wanted, and some of them even left. Massie was approached by Claire as she sat on the pool's edge, her feet resting in the cool water.

Claire roosted beside her, kicking up little spurts of water with her toes, which were tackily painted blue to match her ah-noyingly cute, blue eyes.

"Nice hair, Kuh-Laire."

Claire looked offended. "I like it."

"I do too. That's why I said, 'Nice hair,'" Massie explained.

Claire's hair actually looked pretty. It was tied back in a ponytail but it was curled, and a couple of her side-bangs that she'd grown out were bouncing free from the ponytail, framing her face.

"How's Cam?" Massie quickly asked, trying desperately to strike up a conversation once she realized that Derrington was looking at her. She forced herself to stare straight into Claire's eyes.

"Fine," Claire seemed uncomfortable and fidgeted with her sky blue Target bikini top.

Massie focused only on the blue in her eyes.

Claire started to freak out a bit, "Massie why are you staring at me like that?"

They were both surprised as Cam Fisher grabbed Claire by the waist, lifted her up into his arms and leapt into the pool, with the shrieking blonde still cradled in his arms.

Massie smiled at first, because she had to admit that was cute. But suddenly, a huge torrent of water burst from the pool and absolutely doused Massie and her ah-dorable purple Gucci bikini.

She heard an irresistible laugh and turned around. Derrington was busting a gut laughing at her little humiliation. Massie stood up and trotted off.

Massie strode as coolly as she could to the buffet table. Her wet feet felt like suction cups against the dry, tiled floor.

"Hey Josh!" she scurried up to Josh Hotz, Alicia's boyfriend who definitely lived up to his name. If Derrington wanted to stare at her all night, then he would stare at her with someone else. Preferably from an angle.

Josh turned from Plovert and gave her a strange look, "Hey, sup?" he smiled, friendly.

"Ehmagawd! Josh! You look ah-mazing!" Massie fake-beamed.

Derrington seemed to be un-interested. He was studying his grey sandals.

Massie grew impatient, "JOSH! I SAID YOU LOOK AH-MAZING!" she nearly bellowed.

Derrington looked up.

"Uh, yeah you just said that," Josh shifted his weight uncomfortably.

"I know!" Massie recovered, "I was just making sure you were listening."

"Well, I was." Josh said, turned back to Plovert to hide his confusion.

Massie refused to let her mouth drop. She made a loud, "HUMPH," before sailing off into the crowd.

As Massie shoved through the sea of LBRs, she slammed straight into Dempsey. Massie turned straight away, but it was in vain.

Dempsey said, "Hey Mass! You've been running around all night! Let's go for a swim."

"NO!" Massie said a bit too loud. "I mean, I'm done swimming. See?" Her bikini was still a bit wet. She poked at the fabric. "Sorry. Bye!" She quickly evaporated into the crowd before he could protest. Or stare at her in a wet bikini.

Gawd, thought Massie. She liked Dempsey—before he got all ah-noyingly clingy and protective.

About another ten minutes into the party and some light chit-chatting, Massie was approached by Dylan.

"Ehmagawd! Massie, I feel like a racehorse. I've gotta go inside," she hopped from one foot to the other, signaling that she needed to pee. For some reason Dylan wasn't looking at her in the face. That was a hard feat to do. Being so beautiful, who wouldn't want to look Massie in the face? Hello.

Massie waved her hand dismissively, "Thanks for announcing that. Try not to get the floors wet." She was eyeing Dylan's wet Juicy bathing suit.

Dylan bit her lip nervously and burst into the mansion.

At first, Massie had thought nothing of it, like how she thought nothing of last year's jeans rotting in the back of her closet.

Massie suddenly caught a glimpse of grossly platinum blonde hair flying around like a huge tornado of cheap-looking dye—Olivia—beside a simply unforgettable face. Of course, that face was Derrington.

She sucked in her breath and sprinted over to the flirtatious backstabbers. Now how could she stop that brainless bleached blonde from taking over her man?

WAIT. STOP. PAUSE.

Rewind.

Massie stopped dead in her tracks. Had she just told herself that? Did she just tell herself that she was still crushing on Derrington? And more importantly, why was she talking to herself in the first place?!

Massie coolly sauntered forward, this time at a more relaxed and steady pace. She finally arrived beside Derrington and Olivia. At first they didn't know she was there, but then she "accidentally" stepped on Derrington's foot.

"Ehmagawd! Sorry."

Derrington gave her a miffed look. "Watch it, Block."

"Sorry— I guess I couldn't avoid your big feet," She batted her eyelashes.

Derrington seemed a bit amused.

Massie's perfectly waxed eyebrows pulled together. Why wasn't he getting mad?

Olivia pushed past Massie, knocking the brunette back a bit.

Tip: DO NOT DO THAT TO MASSIE.

"Derrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiick," Olivia whined in a needy manner, "Let's go over there." She pointed to a deserted corner and lifted her eyebrows.

Massie nearly exploded. She scanned the premises for witnesses and then lifted her eyebrows as if she was surprised about something. "Ehmagawd! Olivia, look!"

"What!" Olivia sounded excited.

"Look!" Massie dragged Olivia to the poolside by a thin arm.

"Down there!" Massie pointed to the bottom of the pool. "Gullible is written at the bottom of the pool!"

"No way! Who would do that?" Olivia bent over, "I don't see it!"

"It's uh… down further," Massie explained.

Olivia was astonished, and bent over even further. "I still can't see it."

"Bend over more!"

The blonde bent over. Anyone standing across the pool could easily see down her pink Betsey Johnson bikini top into her ample cleavage.

"MORE!" Massie commanded, half snickering.

Then it happened so fast that Massie didn't even realize her plan had worked until a satisfying wave of water erupted from the pool. Massie quickly jumped backwards just in time as the water soaked Derrington to the skin.

He didn't seem to mind. He was too busy laughing and staring straight at Massie with those big, brown, puppy-dog eyes.

She forced herself to look at Olivia, who'd just come up from the water. Her face was red and flustered, and her hair was considerably shorter.

Massie noticed a couple platinum blonde extensions floating away. She decided not to say anything. For now.

"Massie!" Olivia screeched, "I still didn't see it!" she pushed her hair away from her face.

Massie shrugged. "I guess you scared it away," she proclaimed to the dumbfounded blonde. "You are quite terrifyingly looking you know."

Olivia's mouth fell open. "I am?" "Um, hello? Have you never owned a mirror?" Massie wanted to say, but she resisted the temptation.

Massie nodded truthfully.

"Block," It was Derrington.

Massie froze, "Uh… what's that, Claire! You want me OVER THERE? COMING!" she started to move away but Derrington grabbed her arm and Massie felt a tingle shoot all the way to her shoulder. She shivered against the feeling of his hand on her arm. It sent sparks flying up and down her body.

"Come with me," he said, and led Massie through the crowd.

"I'M BUSY, KUH-LAIRE! SORRY!" Massie hollered into the crowd.

Claire stuck her head out from the pool. "What?"

But Derrington had already pulled her into the shrubbery.

Current State of the Union

IN

Big Feet

Gullibility

Derrington

OUT

Hair Extensions

Sea Gulls

Dempsey