Hero's and Celebrations Chapter 1.
Ok so this isn't completed story like I wanted it to be but I've decided to post if anyway just to see what you think. Please R&R and let me know.
Just a little something that slid into my brain during a bout of insomnia.
Set after episode 5, but there was no final scene. The second tour ended badly for Molly and she's not in a good place. Can Charles get through?
To: charlesjames22
Hi Babes
Just a quick message while I'm still at the uni and I've got wifi. Will be heading back tomorrow via Bastian and will probably not manage contact from now on.
Can't believe it's all done and final students have left. I've had the best time ever. Having a special tea with Maytham and Nasarie tonight, they've popped out to get me some honey buns and other bits from the market. They're top guys, they've helped me massively and have a cracking sense of humour. I'll really miss them.
Can't wait for a hug and a massive bar of galaxy. Only 3 days and counting.
Love Molls xxx
The 3 days passed and Charles was expecting a call, a text message, something, in fact anything from Molly. He'd been trying to get in touch but nothing, no reply to her mobile and no answer to the messages and emails. A further week had passed.
Starting to panic he decided to use he connections in the army and managed to get her NOK detail from her personnel file. Armed with a telephone number he rang and spoke to Mrs Dawes
**OG**
Charles stood on the balcony outside the Dawes family home he'd knocked once normally and then hammered on the door. He was just about to resort to shouting though the letter box. Following his call with Molly's mum he was confident she would be in. He'd stand here all day if necessary.
The door opened. "Oh shit it's you" said Molly. She was stood in her pj's and dressing gown, her hair was scrapped back in a greasy pony tail and she had huge dark circles under red eyes.
"Jesus Molly your mum said you weren't right but my god are you ill?"
"No ... Yes... Well maybe. Oh I don't know. I just feel, well ..." Replied Molly with tears flowing down her cheeks.
"Are you going to invite me in or are we just going to stand here on the doorstep?"
Molly walked back into the house leaving Charles to follow in her wake. Molly flopped down on the sofa and picked up her mug. "Are you going to tell me what's happened? Why you haven't been in touch."
"I can't, I just can't ok. I'm sorry but I can't deal with this, us, the me and you thing. I just can't do any of it at the moment." Replied Molly taking a large mouthful from the mug.
"Molly something's happened and you need to tell me what" Charles got up and opened the curtains. Bright autumn sunlight flooded the room causing Molly to squint. "Last I heard YOU were happy and excited to be coming home, WE were making plans for our future then bang absolutely bloody nothing. I've been worried sick, thought something terrible had happened"
"It did" came a quiet reply.
"Well will you bloody tell me what? I'm not a mind reader all I can see is you like this. Are you sleeping, eating and looking after yourself because it doesn't look like it to me".
"I can't, I can't sleep my brain won't let me, I can't eat with out feeling sick, I can't do anything" she responded before taking a massive gulp from the mug.
"Molly are you drinking? What's in the cup?"
"So what if I am, it helps ok, it helps me to forget and then and only then can I get some bloody peace in here" she said banging the side of her head with the heal of her hand.
Charles reached over and took the mug away and placed it on the coffee table. He crouched down in front of where Molly was sat and tried to hug her but she fought him off. "You see these hands? There's more blood on them, again. People who come near me either get killed or seriously hurt. Lives wrecked one way or another and that is why I can't be around you, you might not be as lucky next time" she was stood up screaming the words out. Her voice was horse and snot and tears mixed together running down her face.
Charles grabbed her, wrapped his arms tightly round her and held her like this til she calmed down. "Shush, shush" he was rocking her like a small child with a grazed knee". He could feel the sobs that had been shaking his body starting to subside. "I'm not going anywhere, I'll take my chances. Now go and get a shower and I'll make you something to eat".
Eventually Molly moved out of his arms. "There'll be nowt in you know, never is." Said Molly over her shoulder as she walked upstairs.
Charles checked in the kitchen while Molly was in the shower. She was right the cupboards were pretty much empty. He decided that a trip to shops would be required.
Molly came back down stairs having showered and blasted her hair with the hair dryer. "Feel better?" Asked Charles.
"A bit" came the quiet reply.
"Your right you know, there's nothing I could make you to eat, so your going to have to take me to the shops."
"What outside? To the shops? I dunno, don't think I can"
"Yes, yes you can, come on the fresh air will do you good." He said passing her some trainers and a jacket.
"I really don't want to go out Charles, please I'm fine I'm really not hungry" Molly sat down on the sofa.
"Molly get these shoes on" he said sitting in front of her holding the trainer open and ready for her foot.
Ten minuets later they were in the shop at the top of the street. Molly was petrified, constantly looking over her shoulder. Beads of sweat were visible on her forehead and her hands were shaking deep in her pockets were she had rammed them.
They walked out of the shop and Molly froze on the street. "No no no NO" she cried getting louder and more panicked. Charles swung round and saw Molly standing in front of a big woman wearing a burqa.
"Molly it's ok, it's ok I promise. Look at me. Look straight at me" Charles held her face in his hands and forced her eyes to focus on him. "Breathe Molly, calm down and breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Now keep doing that and looking at me, that's it." Charles was worried Molly was having a full on panic attack in the middle of the street.
All of Molly's instincts were telling her to run and take cover. She knew Charles was talking sense and she followed his advice but she craved the sanctuary of the house again. "Are you ok, do you think you can walk again" Charles asked
Molly shook her head vigorously as if trying to clear fog in her head "thought it was him again, thought it was Badrai Just get me back, get me out of this hell hole".
They quickly retraced their steps back to the flats through the communal door and up the stairs. The door slammed shut at the bottom of the staircase which made Molly jump and run the last flight of stairs and along the balcony. By the time Charles had caught up Molly was fumbling with the key in the door lock.
"I fucking said no, I said I didn't want to go out. You forced me and now look" Molly was stood I the hallway sobbing. "You made that happen"
"Molly I'm so sorry. I didn't know that would happen". Charles took her in his arms and hugged her. He was just grateful that she would allow this closeness. It was obvious to him now that something had happened to Molly at the end of that second tour to trigger PTSD.
Charles went into the kitchen and set about cleaning up before making an omelette filled with cheese and ham. He placed it in front of Molly and watched as she struggled to eat it. He knew that talking about whatever incident had triggered the PTSD would help but only when the person was ready - Molly obviously wasn't. He also knew that peace and quiet would help. Long walks in the country and getting to grips with nature, not much chance of any of that round here.
"Molly you do know that your showing all the signs of post traumatic stress disorder, there are things we can do to help"
"I'm sad not mad" she snapped.
"I'm not saying that Molly. I'd never say that. I'm trying to tell you that with the right environment and techniques you will start to feel better"
"What makes you the fucking expert PTSD anyway?"
Charles knew Molly's temper would be part of the condition so did his best to ignore it. He took a deep inward breath and bit his bottom lip as he always did when he was thinking if the right thing to say. "Well as an officer I had training to spot the signs. But I have personal experience too. The check point left it's mark, the near death experience was hard to deal with. My rehab at Headley Court wasn't just leg exercises I had counselling too." His counselling was not something he ever talked about before but it opening up helped.
"Really?"
"Yes really, I had a few sessions with a top guy called Vince, he's excellent Molly I'm sure he could help you. He helped me to talk through the demons in my head and deal with some horrific nightmares.
"I've told you, I'm not mad and I don't need to see a fucking shrink". Spat Molly before storming out of the living room into the kitchen and scrapping the half eaten omelette in the bin then throwing the plate into the sink. She stood there with her hands on the sink and her head hung low. She wished she didn't feel like this, if this oppressive darkness would kindly fuck off she feel much better.
**OG**
By 3.30pm the house was filled shouting children. Molly had taken herself off to her room and shut the door. Charles spoke to Belinda "Is this how she's been since getting back"
"Yes pretty much, she avoids us mostly. Up in her room till the children go to bed and then comes down later"
Charles explained to Belinda all about what had happened at the shops with Molly's panic attack "she needs looking after, she needs peace and quiet and a routine but most of all she needs to speak to a therapist, someone to teacher how best to deal with how she is feeling".
"How do we do that" said Belinda still at the table and passing Charles a mug of tea "cheers for the milk by the way". She said holding up her mug.
"I don't know" said Charles rubbing the back of his neck. "Please don't take offence but I really don't think here is helping, do you know she was drinking wine when I arrived at 11am?"
Belinda was shocked, she knew Molly was bad but drinking during the day on her own, panic attacks and everything else she shook her head. "what can we do love? Her dad thinks she should just snap out of it, but that int gunna happen is it?"
Charles thought for a while "I have friends who have a holiday home in Chichester, I'm sure they'll let me rent it for a few weeks. There's lovely beaches and the South Downs for country walks and it's within driving distance of Headley Court."
"What's at Headley Court?"
"Sorry it's the Defence Services Medical Rehabilitation Centre. They have specialists who deal with PTSD as well as rehabilitation of injuries." Replied Charles. "She just needs to talk to someone professional to help her through this, these people are experts in the type of trauma Molly may have faced".
"I've told you many times I'm not going to see any head doctors. I'm fine I just need some time and peace and quiet to get my head sorted" said Molly from the doorway of the sitting room, were she had been stood listening to the conversation inside. "I'll go though because it ain't gunna happen here anytime soon" as two of her brothers barged passed in a mad rush to get prime spot in front of the telly.
**OG**
Two hours later after a few phone calls they were ready to set off. "Take care love and listen to Charles he seems to know what he's talking about" said Belinda giving Molly a big squeeze.
"Yes mum I will" Molly said as she got in to the passenger seat.
"I'll look after her I promise. I will do every thing I can to get her back to her normal self. I'll keep in touch just to let you know how she is getting on".
"Thanks love". Belinda watched as Charles got into the car and drove off down the street. She just wanted her Molls back and this seemed for the best, it hurt that she couldn't do it herself but she was clueless.
